Satisfied
Chapter 6: Satisfied
Are you satisfied with an average life?
Do I need to lie to make my way in life?
Are you satisfied with an easy ride?
Once you cross the line, will you be satisfied?
August
Lyra awoke in her four poster bed to the sound of bickering downstairs. The Ravenclaw noticed that the sun was still rising, much too early for a debacle, even for the recent state of their household. Since Andromeda’s departure the rest of the house became chaos; devastated over the lost of her closest confidante, Narcissa began to question her own relationship and choices, suggesting to Lucius they take a break so she could supposedly focus on her NEWTS and him on his business ventures as a new graduate, leading to a separation. Her Mother was devastated at this social loss, still dealing with the ramifications of their daughter leaving. Though this was not all.
The invitation to the wedding had come a week after the incident, a note attached,
A formality before the prophet announcement , I hope you can come around,
Andromeda
Their parents of course said they wouldn’t be going, Bella burning the invitation, Despite Lyra’s pleading. The household grew even more tense,her father seemed sombre, her mother enraged. Thus Bellatrix was forced into an engagement with Rabastan Lestrange, a wizard 15 years her senior. The argument she assumed about said engagement, Bella was not pleased, but she was going to fulfil her duty.
Deciding she could no longer ignore the bickering, she pulled on her plush navy robe, and made her way down the stairs to see her mother and sister arguing over a copy of the prophet, the announcements page. Looking down she noticed that the announcement for Ted and Andromeda beat Bellatrix and Rabastan to the paper.
“Well, Good Morning to you two” Lyra said smugly, proud of Andromeda, her Jo, for having the upper hand, taking a bite of toast as she did so.
“Do not Start Lyra” her mother scolded, “I’ll ban you from going to your little friends house at the end of the week” she spoke sternly at this, knowing that would devastate her youngest daughter.
Both Lyra and Sirius, had been invited to James’ for the remainder of summer, Though Lyra’s parents had not been too impressed, she had managed to convince her parents in the end, her father always had a soft spot she managed to hit. “Sorry” she mumbled, not wanting to risk it.
What her mother did not know was that Sirius would go to James’ this friday, the 4th of August, and while she thought Lyra was too, she would really be spending the weekend at Charlotte Fawcett’s with her other roommates, Maeve Dover, Emmaline Vance, and Mary Macdonald. Although she could not wait to see the rest of her friends, she was just a touch more excited to be reunited with the girls, communication had been scarce at her home, worried her mother would punish her for having muggleborn friends, especially after the events of the summer.
—-
The week was passed faster than she hoped, as she sat with Narcissa on the lawn, she asked her sister a question,
“Why did you really break up with Lucius Cissa?” She knew her look-a-like claimed it was because of NEWTS but she knew that wasn’t the truth, she was sure there was another reason, “Not the NEWTS excuse” she added with a pointed look.
“Dromeda made me realise that I need to know myself, not just who I am supposed to be” she said, looking wistful, “I want to make sure I know my values, I know what I want, before I settle” she smiled.
“Did you love him” Lyra queried further, ever curious about the love she saw around her, she knew her father loved her mother, but he loved her in a dutiful way, he did not look at her the way she saw Ted look at Andromeda.
Narcissa thought for a moment, drumming her fingers on her leg “Yes” she finally answered, “I love Lucius, I still do, but I need to make sure he’s what I want, not just what I settled for because it’s a comfortable love” she shrugged “ I want to know it’s the deepest love, I know there must be more than one type of love out there”
Lyra hummed, unsure of what to say, there were people she loved of course, her friends, her family, well, most of her family, but someone she loved like Narcissa described? She didn’t think so, “I don’t know if I’ll ever love anyone that way” Lyra shrugged in response, she couldn’t imagine loving anybody that way.
“You will one day little star” Narcissa responded, running her hands through Lyra’s hair affectionately, she looked her in the eye, with a particularly hopeful expression, “but for now, I hope you love me the most, because you’re my favourite person in the world” her sister spoke, now cupping her small face in her slender hands, the cool touch of grandmother Rosier’s opal ring shocking her.
“I love you the most” Lyra said, quickly wrapping her sister into a hug, squeezing as tight as she could, “promise you won’t leave too” she said tearfully, missing her elder sister during this conversation.
“You’ll always have me” Narcissa reassured, just as she spoke, an unfamiliar bird flew into their view, dropping off a letter, not even waiting for a treat after Narcissa untied the scroll.
“Who’s it from?” Lyra queried, peering over at the scroll.
“Let's find out” Narcissa smirked, clearing her throat she began to read the letter, a gasp escaping her as she read the first sentence;
Dearest Meg & Amy,
I hope you can forgive me for my lack of correspondence, things have been very hectic since we last spent time together. My darling Beau, Frederick Salazar, has been so kind in taking on the task of finding us a house, but for now we’re staying with some good friends. I hope you will accept my request; if possible to be my Bridesmaids. Nothing would make me happier. Of course, I know this may prove difficult but I will leave the Address of the event, and the time and place.
Longbottom Manor
Saturday August 12th
1:00 pm
All my love,
Jo
The two sister’s wept at the third sister’s letter, unsure of what was to come, but knowing she wanted them to be a part of their day was enough to help them push through until they could return to Hogwarts.
________
The morning of August second, Lyra was once again asleep in her room, enjoying the luxury of a bed larger than a twin when several loud voices carried up the stairs, stirring her from her peaceful sleep, just as she was about to turn over, they burst into her room and she felt two large weights on either side of her, “Lyra wake up” shouted one voice, shaking her arm gently.
The blonde opened one eye tentatively, squinting due to the sunshine pouring in, she noticed on her right was an ecstatic regulus shaking her shoulder, turning to her right, opening both her eyes slowly, she noticed it was Sirius, of course, he smiled his signature smile at her, though she thought she noticed a hint of a bruise on his cheek, perhaps it was just the hue of her walls reflecting on his face though.
“Good morning Sunshine” Sirius teased, ruffling her bed head “did you miss us?” He queried, their family had just returned from the Black Chateau in France. Lycra’s family usually also joined them, but due to the circumstances they were all punished, not allowed to go as they fixed what her mother called “ the disgrace of the century”
Lyra wrapped her arms around both Sirius and Regulus, planting a kiss on both of their heads “ I missed you both so much, it’s been dreadful” she cried.
The boys hugged her back Regulus quickly, while Sirius held on, whispering “ never leave me alone with them again”, she hugged him back harder.
Regulus had now jumped up “ our letters came!” The normally even-tempered boy shouted, “ I can get my wand, we can go to Diagon alley on Friday go get my uniform too!” He smiled, blush on his cheeks.
“ Reg! That’s amazing” Lyra smiled back, jumping up “that’ll mean Cissa will know if she’s head girl!” She ran out the door, down to her sisters room, the boys trailing after her.
“Wicked!” Sirius exclaimed, thrilled at the idea of family in charge, Cissa, like Andromeda wouldn’t get him in much trouble for his shenanigans, ensuring his mother wouldn’t get a letter home.
When narcissa wasn’t in her room, she checked downstairs, and there, the trio found her, glumly stirring her tea, “ I’m not head girl” sighed Narcissa “ just prefect.” The three, wrapped her in a bear hug, whispering their reassurances that she was still great. “ I’m sure it’s some ravenclaw swot” smirked Sirius looking in Lyra’s eye”, she shoved him at that.
“I think it’s probably a Gryffindor” narcissa spoke rolling her eyes, “I’ll still take us all to diagon Friday, Reg, you can meet with us once your wand is bought, we can get ice cream at fortescues” she smiled a bit, though it wasn’t reaching her eyes, Lyra knew she was occluding, a skill their father taught them all when they turned 13.For protection he said, from what though, Lyra wouldn’t ever understand, the wizarding world was as safe as ever, nobody would ever harm them.
———
That evening, Lyra found herself in the library with Sirius and Regulus, making sure that nobody was near, she whispered to the boys, “Dromeda sent Cissa and I a letter, she wants us at her wedding.” Regulus gasped and Sirius perked up, “are you going to go?” Sirius pressed.
Lyra sighed “ I don’t think I can, I’ll be at the Potter’s and Cissa will be here” she shrugged apathetically.
“Well can I go then” Regulus pleaded, “Oh Reg come off it” Sirius scolded “ Like you could ever get there if Lyra can’t even figure it out” he rolled his eyes.
The three remained in silence after that, each reading their own book, or in Sirius’ case; trying to climb the giant statue of Merlin next to the hearth.
———-
As her cousin and sister sat in the library, Narcissa remained in the dining room, waiting for her parents to berate her, along side her aunt and uncle they requested her presence for a discussion.
Narcissa had had enough, all she wanted was to be loved but she felt Immense pressure to over achieve to compensate for her sister’s leaving and her other sister’s slight insanity. She also wanted to protect Lyra from feeling the same burden; and if she could be enough, maybe they’d leave her alone.
Her mother sat down next to her, “ I’m quite disappointed to hear you didn’t get head girl, such a shame you can’t even best that blood traitor” she spoke, indignantly, waving her hand in the direction of the tapestry, of which Andromeda had been burned off.
“ I am trying mother” she sighed, clenching her fists in anger, she could feel the crescent shaped dents in her palm due to the pressure.
“Well you’re failing miserably” Warburga cut in, as cold as ever “ couldn’t keep the Malfoy heir, couldn’t get head girl, maybe we should dig a little deeper to find out what’s going on”
Narcissa now understood what this was, her aunt, ever the skilled legilimens was likely going to use it against her. “ do you want an average life Narcissa” she said, poking in to Narcissa’s brain before she could throw up a shield, seeing Narcissa’s desire for children, a family.
“You want love?” How pathetic she tutted, “Druella, perhaps we should imperio her, she may be desperate enough to find a muggleborn or halfblood, let’s hope it doesn’t run in the family” she prepared to enter her mind again, but Narcissa pictured the calming waters of the ocean; and was able to occlude, feeling her Aunt try to enter, like nails on a chalkboard.
“ I want to be happy” Narcissa coldly responded behind the occlusion, “ I want to do what I want, Pressure free” she shouted t as she exited the room, running up the stairs towards the comfort of her younger relatives. Often she felt that they were the only people in the whole world she could trust and depend on, they hadn’t been broken like she had yet, and she hoped they never would.
Narcissa often worried the only way she would be able to protect them from the burden would be to lie, to pretend she was fully satisfied with whomever she married, to go along with their games. She just hoped she could love them enough to be happy, and that they would love her, she wanted to break this cycle for her sister, for her brothers, for her children.