james potter was cold
he felt deeply cold
is was late in the night and the moon was shining above his head
he was looking at the stars
smoke around his pale presence
he recognised his best mate in them
in a way he was there for him
holding his blunt
staring blankly at the night sky
he took a deep breath
sadness was not something he was allowed to feel
it was not something he could show
he felt guilty about it
about being sad
he wasn't allowed to be like that
that just wasn't him
he wishes he could talk about it
about how much it was cold
how much he was cold
inside
is heart was beating fast
he could hear it while he allowed his thoughts to trail off how he felt
it's comforting
feeling
while the moon shines above him
he loves the moon
he loves the stars
and the earth
he loved everything
he loved so much
he cared so much
did they care
about him as well?
would they care if he showed that he wasn't really happy
would they leave
if he tried putting words the coldness that was taking over his body
would they leave if he showed that he wasn't always happy and loud and funny
would they find him worthless
if he didn't make them laugh then what the point of keeping him around
james potter has always been lucky, and sometimes he felt guilty about it
because his friends has been through so much
his friends has suffered so many times
they are the strongest people he has ever met
the silence was taking over
there was no more smoke coming out his lungs
maybe he wasn't enough
maybe he was too much