False assumptions
You feel someone tugging at your clothes. You hear beeping and people screaming. Wait that’s Emily, Emily I can hear you. You try to open your eyes but you can’t,
Someone pushed your eye open and you can see a flashlight shining in. What’s happening? Your eye was closed again. Your heart feels like it’s going to beat out of your chest, but the pain is now gone, you feel warm and cozy. Even in your devastated state you know that this isn’t a good sign. Everything goes black again.
Is this death you ask yourself. There isn’t a light to go into there’s just nothing. There is this beeping again it’s annoying, please shut it off. You can hear people speaking, you can’t make out what they are saying. You try to open your eyes but you had no luck.
„We don’t know when and if she will wake up“ someone says. „My team wants to see her“, wait that’s Hotch. Hotch I can hear you I’m not dead. They walked out. No please wait, you wanted to scream at them, but there isn’t a sound coming out no matter how hard you tried.
The next person who comes in doesn’t say anything. There’s sniffling next to you when someone grabs your hand, the crying becomes louder. „Please wake up. Baby please“ someone begged you. Emily. You would recognise the sound of her voice everywhere.
„I was a coward. The love I felt and still feel for you scared me. Wake up so I can explain everything to you. I want to show you how much I love you please. You can’t die now, I couldn’t even tell you that I love you“
I know Emily, I can hear everything. Why can’t you hear me?? She doesn’t leave after that. After a while you can feel her head laying down on your leg. She’s softly touching your face. You want to tell her that everything will be okay.
The door opens, you hear someone shuffling around. „Emily you should shower and change your clothes“. That’s JJ. JJ please can you hear me you try again, but there’s no reaction. Emily tried to disagree with JJ but there wasn’t a chance. The door closed again and JJ takes your hand.
„Y/N you really have to wake up“, she begged you. But after that she didn’t speak anymore.
Pain, that’s what you feel when finally manage to open your eyes. You are laying in a hospital bed. JJ is sleeping in an uncomfortable looking chair next to you. You try to speak but all you can manage to get out is a groan. JJ stirred awake her head shooting to you.
„Omg wait I’m going to help you“ she says quickly moving to help you sit up. She hands you a glass of water and pills. „What happened“ you rasped out. Before she could give you an answer Emily runs into the room.
Wordlessly she kissed you, you can taste the salt of her tears. She holds your face gently as if you would disappear again. She starts to talk but you try to stop her, she doesn’t have to tell you everything while you are still laying in a hospital bed. She just shakes her head „please. I’ve waited way too long to explain everything“.
And then she tells you everything. You find out that Mark was in fact not her boyfriend. He was actually gay. Her mother pressured her into a relationship so Emily wouldn’t show up alone at her galas because as her mother said „that wouldn’t make a good impression“. So she picked Mark. He was her childhood friend, they bonded over the fact that they both like the same gender. Growing up in a religious household that wasn’t accepted, so they found a sort of comfort in each other. Emily didn’t want to pressure the things going on between the two of you. You only had one date as her mother asked her to attend one of her galas again so she asked Mark, to be her alibi date. Next week is another gala Emily has to attend, that’s why she talked to Mark this morning.
You felt so incredibly stupid. You didn’t even let her explain everything. You just assumed that she was in a relationship. God if you would just have listend to her as she wanted to explain everything to you. As if she could hear your thoughts she talked again. „Hey don’t blame yourself do you hear me? I would have assumed the same thing if I was you. If I wouldn’t have been to scared to admit my feelings for you, I would have stayed every night. I mean I was never there when you woke up and then you her someone saying he talked to me this morning. Of course you think of cheating. If you want to blame someone, blame me.“
You just kissed her. You don’t want to blame anyone anymore. „Please I want to be your date for the gala next week Emily“ you told her. You don’t want to hide anymore, you don't want to hide ever again. If you could, you would run out of the door and scream as loud as you can that you love her. And the best thing? She loves you too and nothing can change that.
„First you heal okay? Then we talk about everything“, she replied smiling. As she laid next to you, your head on her shoulder, you both drift off peacefully to sleep, finally holding the ones you love.