Chapter 5
Defence against the dark arts was the worst subject in the whole world, Harry decided after his second month ended. His scar always hurt and Professor Quirrell never seemed to be able to get a word out without stuttering. His hands shook all the time meaning he dropped the chalk when he wrote on the black board, which meant he had to pick it up, which meant he’d hit his head on his desk, which meant he had to go back to his office and get an icepack. And then he’d hide there for the rest of the class and no one would learn a thing.
It was a treacherous headache that Harry was sure was gonna kill him.
“I should surely start a study group.” Hermione thought aloud at one of their library exhibitions.
“You do too much studying, ‘Mione.” Harry reasoned.
Hermione slammed her book shut and glared at him. “I study the perfect amount thank you very much!”
“Sure, sure.” He muttered, writing a verse from his book in his messy handwriting.
“Have you made up with your dad yet?” She then asked, sounding pitying.
Harry raised his head and scrunched his eyebrows. “Mums trying to get him to talk to me, and Remus, but he’s only said a few words to me.”
“What about your godfather?”
“You mean my dogfather,” Harry reimplied, “and he’s said he’s trying to talk to him but it’s bloody difficult. Dads always been stubborn when it’s come to things that annoy him. One time when I was younger, I hid his glasses and replaced them with mine. Dad pledged he’d wear mine if I wore his and we did that for a day till I started crying at the headache I was getting. Anyway, dad refused to take mine off, saying he could last longer than me, so dad wore my too small glasses for a week. Mum got sick of it and traded them when we were sleeping. He was more mad about mums betrayal than the actual joke, I think.”
Hermione sighed. “Maybe I’ll have a word with him, I need him to know he’s being immature and making you miserable in the process.”
“Don’t you dare! I had to stop Draco from doing that when he found me crying about it.”
Hermione gasped and covered her mouth. “You’ve cried about it?”
Harry groaned and shut his book, a puff of smoke lifted into the air. “No, just pretend you didn’t hear that.”
“That’s practically child abuse, you know!” She whispered furiously.
“How is that child abuse? He hasn’t hurt me.”
“Not physically.”
Harry glared at his friend. “Hermione, leave it.”
“I will not just sit here while my friend, no, my best friend is getting abused by his father!” She whispered again, eyes gleaming like fire.
They held eye contact for a moment, Harry looked at the ceiling and covered his face.
“I’ll talk to Moony and see if he has something to say about it.”
Hermione nodded seriously. “I’ll come with you.”
“No you won’t!”
“Oh yes I will, I bet my entire life savings you won’t even mention it.” She fought.
“You don’t know that.” Harry defended, his voice high at the end. Hermione was definitely right though, he’d probably wimp out and start a completely different conversation.
Hermione gave him a look that said she defiantly didn’t believe him. “I’m not stupid, Harry.”
“Never said you were.” He surrendered.
Hermione got up and collected all her books plus some extras she picked up for light reading. “Come on, Harry, we don’t have all day.”
“We’re going now?” Harry whined.
“Obviously,” She crossed her arms, "do I need to get Malfoy to drag you out?”
Harry replicated her stance still sitting down and grinned. “Good luck trying to get him to do anything, let alone find him. This castle is pretty big, you know.”
Hermione raised an eyebrow and stalked over to behind a bookcase, then returned a moment later with Draco, Pansy, Tracey, Millicent and Crabbe behind her.
“What’s this I hear about your stupid father?” Draco questioned, glaring at Harry.
“Nothing.” Harry groaned loudly, putting his face on the table.
Draco pulled up the seat next to him and poked his cheek. “You can’t have been nothing if the mudblood called me over.”
Harry lifted his head and scowled. “Do not call her that.”
Draco rolled his eyes. “It was a joke Har-“
“It has never been a joke and won’t ever be a joke.”
“Not this again, Harry, you know I was raised like this.”
“Well I certainly can’t be friends with someone who calls people… that!” Harry exclaimed, getting louder by the moment.
Draco huffed and scrunched up his nose, it would have been cute if Harry wasn’t furious.
“I don’t even know what it means!” Draco preserved.
Harry stood up then. “As if you lier!”
Draco stood up too. “I’m not lying!”
“Then why would you say it if you don’t know what it means?”
“Because father said that was what we call muggleborns!”
“How could you be so stupid to belief that’s what they’re called?” Harry yelled.
Draco looked taken aback. “I’m not stupid.”
“Oh that’s what you got from that?” Harry patronised.
“Boys please,” Pansy stepped in, taking Draco’s elbow, “you’re all gonna get zits with all this arguing. Dray, apologise to Granger, then can we go?”
Draco crossed his arms. “I won’t apologise for something when I don’t know what I did wrong.”
Harry scoffed. “You are full of shit.”
“Language!” Hermione scolded.
“I’m defending you, Hermione!” Harry shouted, his eyes were wild. He groaned and covered his face with both hands.
Everyone was silent. Draco and Harry were breathing heavily and Hermione was sniffing. Crabbe coughed into his fist and scratched his head, looking at Millicent and Tracey awkwardly. Pansy wasn’t having it and stamped her foot like a rabbit.
“So are we going to see Mr Lupin or just stand here?”
Hermione cleared her throat and wiped her moist eyes. “Yes, right. Come on, Harry, we don’t want to miss him.”
Harry removed his hands, glancing at Draco he took his wrist and pulled it softly. “Come with me,” then as a reminder he added “please.”
“Okay.” Draco muttered. He then looked at Hermione and cleared his throat. “I’m sorry, Granger, it was wrong of me to call you that.”
Hermione didn’t reply but she smiled toothily, showing off her very white buck teeth.
“Can we please go now?” Pansy asked with frustration. “I have better things to do that talk to a professor!”
“You don’t even have any classes with him.” Tracey added as the group started walking out.
“That’s not the point.” Pansy huffed, walking faster.
“You gonna do Arithmancy in year three?” Millicent called out before her friend turned a corner.
“Not if I have to see him over the holidays if Hazz invites me over.” Pansy called back.
“You do know Rem- I mean Mr Lupin doesn’t live with me.” Harry giggled.
“He’s in, like, every photograph you own.” Draco put in.
Harry noticed he was still holding Draco’s wrist but decided not to let go. Since friends hold wrists with each other all the time.
He poked Dracos cheek and giggled again when he slapped his hand away “Not every photograph.”
——
Remus held his chin in his hand, his eyes were narrow, his knee was bouncing up and down and he kept taking little sips from his mug which had a silhouette of a dog printed on it and said ‘I love my dog more than any human’ in bold writing. Harry remembered when Sirius gave it to him for Christmas a few years back, Remus had laughed loudly and promised to break it once the couple got home. That obviously didn’t happen.
The group had made it to Remus’s office and were currently sitting on his comfy couch. Harry tried to tell his godfather what his friends were worried about but ended up getting the words stuck in his throat, causing him to choke up and almost started sobbing. He always seemed to start crying whenever he visited Moony. Hermione had his back, and told the professor instead.
Remus was currently processing.
“Well,” he started, “I see why you would want to come to me for this.”
“Obviously.” Draco muttered.
Remus turned his head towards the blonde and his jaw visually clenched, he then turned back to Harry and leaned forwards to place a hand on his knee.
“James, your father, is unintentionally hurting you. And I can see how it has affected you, Harry.” Remus muttered softly, looking Harry in the eyes.
Harry nodded quickly, forcing himself not to cry.
“Maybe this should be a private conversation.” Remus said, looking at Harrys friends. “I thank you for bringing this problem to my attention, but this is a family matter.”
“We live with him, Professor.” Crabbe defended.
Draco nodded and wrapped an arm around Harry’s shoulders. “I’ve been worried about him for months, Lupin, I think Crabbe and I should stay!”
Remus pursed his lips and looked between the roommates. “Alright, you boys can stay, if that’s what Harry is comfortable with. Girls, I’ll lead you outside.”
As the girls left, Crabbe and Malfoy sat closer to Harry as if to show they weren’t leaving his side. Harry felt a wave of affection wash over him.
Remus sat back down on the opposite couch and shook out his hands. “Professor Dumbledore said you were taken to the hospital after dinner two days ago, Harry?”
Harry nodded but Draco spoke. “It was terrifying, Professor, his scar was hurting so much he collapsed in the Great Hall during dinner! Blaise Zabini and I took him to the infirmary and stayed with him till he felt better.”
Remus nodded gravely. “Are you feeling better now, Harry?”
“Sometimes,” Harry stuttered, “sometimes my scar really hurts, then sometimes it stings, then other times it doesn’t hurt at all.”
Remus nodded gravely again. “Is it stinging now?”
“No.”
They were silent as Remus looked inquisitively over Harry’s frame.
“What’s this got to do with the current problem, of you know, Harry getting abused by his father?” Draco asked, sounding harsh.
“In a moment Mr Malfoy, I was unfortunately ill when Harry’s great Great Hall collapse happen, I’m just catching up.” Remus said, looking like he’s in another world.
He then ran a hand through his light curls and shook his hand again. “Okay. Harry, I do think you’re getting neglected by your dad which is a type of abuse.”
Harry’s eyes widened and he knew they were getting filled with tears. “What?”
Remus looked extremely sorrowful and leaned forwards to take his hand. “I’m so sorry. I can’t change Prong’s mind but I can yell at him until he changes his opinion.”
“I haven’t done anything, though.” Harry whispered, looking at their joint hands. Draco put a reassuring hand around his shoulders and squeezed.
“I know Prongslet, we’ll sort this out. But remember,” Remus suddenly turned stern and tugged their hands to get Harry to look in his eyes, “this isn’t your fault. This is your father being a dickhead and Sirius and I will fucking pound him till he gets the stick that’s stuck up his arse and give you the love you deserve. I won’t have godson crying into his pillow every night, okay?”
Harry nodded and pulled on Remus’s long fingers. Draco snorted and Crabbe was silently giggling, his shoulders obtusely shaking. They were definitely not used to Remus Lupins devotion to using a swear word in every sentence.
Remus noticed and grinned mischievously at the boys. “Don’t kiss and tell.”
Harry laughed loudly. “I don’t know how you survive six hours of classes without swearing.”
“I just mutter ‘what the fuck’ every second of the day.” He shrugged as if it was normal.
Draco looked impressed, staring at awe at Harry’s godfather. “Maybe I’ll do arithmancy in two years time."
Remus laughed and let go of Harry and his joint hands. “As much as I love having these fun conversations, we should talk about Mr Weasley.” He said the last part without any humour.
Harry crossed his arms and slumped into the couch. “I don’t want to talk about, Ronald.”
Remus raised an eyebrow. “He’s Ronald now, I’m predicting you two haven’t talked yet?”
“No! He won’t even look at me!”
“He talked to you before you fell.” Crabbe added, looking proud to participate in the conversation.
“Did he?” Remus asked with wide eyes.
Draco nodded. “Yep! He acted like he was worried about him but then ran back to his table with Neville when we tried to help Harry up.”
“Do you think my scar hurts when I’m stressed or something?” Harry asked, feeling the lightning on his forehead.
Remus shook his head. “I doubt it, it’s never hurt before at home.”
Harry fell back on the couch and stared at the ceiling, the chandelier was bright and lit the room with a warm glow. “Moony, this is too hard to figure out.”
Remus chuckled and stood to put his cup away. “You’re smart, Harry. Now, it’s getting late and dinner starts in half an hour, how about you go back to your dorms and have a little rest.”
“Good idea, we’ve been in these robes all fucking day.” Crabbe grumbled.
“Watch your language, Mr Crabbe.” Remus scolded.
Crabbe looked betrayed and opened his mouth to respond, pointing between Remus, Draco and Harry. “Wha- you saw what just happened, right?”
Remus shrugged and opened the door to lead them out of his office. “Yes we did, and I saw you swearing in front of a teacher. You three better go back before the Peeves finds you or I take away house points.” He gave them a pointed look, and winked at Harry before closing the door.
“What a-a-a-“ Crabbe said, trying to find the right word.
“Hypocrite?” Draco helped.
Crabbe nodded, his eyebrows furrowed into a frown. “Exactly! What a hypocrite.”
“I, for one, am starving.” Harry added quickly.
Draco groaned and rubbed his stomach. “Agreed. Let’s hope your scar doesn’t start hurting. It wasn’t too bad yesterday.”
“It stung.” Harry whined, tapping his head.
“It also stung in Defence Against the Dark Arts but that doesn’t mean it will suddenly make sense why.” Crabbe added, patting his empty stomach.
Harry only hummed.
——
“You are being ridiculous!” A deep voiced snapped through the dungeon.
“I-I’m n-n-not!” A stuttering voice replied.
Harry shushed the talking boys behind him, placing a hand over both their mouths, he looked around the corner to see Professor Snape talking, or more like fighting, with Professor Quirrell. His head of house had the quivering man up against the wall with his wand under his chin.
“Enough with the stuttering, we’re alone here” Snape spat, digging his wand into the mans chin.
The professor dry sobbed. “I-I can-n’t help i-it.”
Harry imagined Professor Snape rolling eyes. “You are an embarrassment.”
“N-not as-s much as Dumbl-bledor-“
“Shut up, you foolish man! The walls in this dreaded castle are thinner than you think.” Snape scolded quietly. Harry had to quickly hide behind the wall when he started looking around.
“Th-the Dark Lord is-isn’t as we-weak as you-u may think.” Quirrell suddenly whispered, Harry strained his ears to hear.
“Leave me out of this Quirrell,” he spat, “if you’re anymore obvious I’ll call the Auror’s on you myself.”
“Li-like they’d belie-believe you over, qui-quivering Pro-Professor Quirrell.” Professor Quirrell patronised.
“We will see.” Snape said slowly, yet very lowly.
The professors held gaze for a moment before pulling away, Snape put his wand back in his pocket. Professor Quirrell straightened his clothes out quickly and adjusted his turban.
“I’ve been down your road before Quirinus, you are not being subtle.” Snape muttered darkly.
Professor Quirrell quirked his head and then spoke very clearly. “Alright Severus.” Before turning down the hall where the boys were hiding. The boys glanced at one another with wide eyes, what the hell was going on?
“He literally falls over when a pixie jumps a little, I am so confused.” Crabbe grumbled.
Harry seemed to be the only one sensing Quirrell coming closer so he gestured to his friends to follow him to a tapestry which Remus told him about on one of their towers of the castle.
“I can’t tell you all the marauder secrets, Prongslet, but it’s helpful knowing the more obvious hiding places surrounding ones common room.” He had said, tapping his nose.
“Get inside, hurry.” Harry whispered harshly, pushing everyone inside before coming in behind them just as the Professor turned the corner.
Unfortunately, the Professor stopped right in front of the tapestry.
“The fuck.” Crabbe whispered, both Draco and Harry shushed him quickly.
Then, he walked closer to their tapestry, the shadow of his feet stopped right in front of them and all three boys froze. Harry felt Professor Quirrell staring right at him and he begged himself not to make any sound. He covered his mouth just in case, but didn’t close his eyes, still feeling like Quirrell was staring at him through the thick fabric. The odd Professor must have gotten bored after a few moments, because his shadow relinquished and the boys could hear his soft footsteps further down the hallway.
“What the actual fu-“ Crabbe started when all of a sudden the familiar anguishing pain flared in his scar just like it did in the Great Hall and Harry collapsed.
He tried not to scream or let out any distressing sound since the Professor was still in hearing distance so he kept his mouth covered and held his scar against the cold stone, as if that could stop the pain.
Draco and Crabbe had the same idea, and silently went to his height. Draco rubbed his back and turned so he could rest his forehead on the back of Harry’s head. The small rook in the wall was very small and very tight, and if any of the boys made a big move then that may result in making the tapestry move; which was something none of them wanted. Harry was practically on Dracos lap as the taller boy comforted him, whispering “it will be okay”’s and stroking his hair.
Harry soon felt the pain drift away and he lifted his head, moving his sweaty hair from his face. He took a deep breathe and rested the side of his face on Draco’s shoulder, Draco also took a deep breathe and continued to rub his back, up and down.
“Fuck, Potter, two times in one week is definitely not a coincidence.” Crabbe muttered, shaking his head with disbelief.
Harry felt Draco nod. “Agreed. And no one has told us anything. Stupid Dumbledore, I’m surprised he’s still allowed to teach at this school. I’ll be telling father all about this.”
“This has nothing to do with the Headmaster.” Harry muttered, not feeling well enough to raise his forehead from the comfortable position.
“Are we just gonna ignore what we just saw?” Crabbe exclaimed, pointing towards the corridor.
“That absolutely was very strange.” Harry thought aloud.
“I’ll ask Professor Snape,” Draco decided. “He is my godfather, after all, and I know he wouldn’t do something too bad.”
“‘Too bad’?” Harry questioned, raising his head and crossing his arms.
Draco shrugged. “He’s friends with my family so he can’t be that good.”
“Love the honesty. Ma and Pa don’t tell me anything about what they’re doing.” Crabbe added, sounding sad.
Harry scratched his scalp and pulled the edge of the tapestry back a little so he could see if the corridor was empty. Luckily, it was dead silent.
“We should go now, we only have 5 minutes till dinner.” He whispered, looking at his golden watch his dad bought him for his 10th birthday.
“We were having a good conversation!” Draco complained, getting up from the ground and dusting his perfectly clean robes.
“You can finish it at dinner, I’m starving.”
“God, me too.” Crabbe groaned, heaving himself off the hard floor.
When they arrived at dinner, Professor Quirrell and Professor Snape weren’t to be seen. Instead, Headmaster Albus Dumbeldore raised a goblet to the boys and Harry swore his eyes twinkled, but not the good kind.