i know places we won't be found
December 3rd, 1976
The chill of the December air nipped at James’ nose, tousling his hair as he waited for Regulus.It was December now; the snow was covering every uncovered inch of the school grounds, the air was cold, and the first Hogsmeade trip of the year had come. James had proposed the idea of going to Hogsmeade together, since Regulus had run out of ink, and James had stolen all of Regulus’ quills due to him misplacing all of his. He adjusted his scarf around his neck, pushing his glasses back up on his nose as he stood in the snow-covered courtyard of the castle and waited for his boyfriend.
The Slytherin dorms were a fair bit away from the center of the castle, due to them being in the dungeons, so it wasn’t surprising that James had to wait so long for Regulus. He hadn’t listened to his anxieties this morning; the urge to bring the Marauders map with him, to make sure that Regulus was coming, to make sure Barty and Snape hadn’t gotten to him again. Those urges were all strong, but he was thankful he was able to simply leave the map in their messy dorm room, and though his nerves were still high, he knew he could trust Reg.
Speaking of Reg, James felt his nerves completely slip away as he saw his boyfriend walk up. Regulus was wearing a black trench coat, a dark green sweater layered underneath. He had his Slytherin scarf wrapped tightly around his neck and a bright smile on his lips. “Hey,” Regulus said, walking up to James. “Ready to go, love?” He asked. James nodded, reaching out to grab Regulus’ hand. They began the walk down to Hogsmeade, trudging through the vast expanse of snow before them.
“How are your ribs healing?” James asked. Regulus shrugged. “They’re healing well. Madame Pomfrey gave me some Skele-Gro when they first got broken. I’ll go back in tomorrow for her to check up on them, and then I should be good to play Quidditch again.” He said. James nodded, running his thumb over Regulus’ knuckles.
“Sirius has detention, and Remus decided to stay behind so they can have some alone time,” James grimaced, making Regulus laugh. “So it’s just us today.”
Regulus nodded. “What about Peter?” He asked.
James squinted, furrowing his brow as he thought. “I think he’s studying for a potions exam? I dunno, he said something about studying with a girl from Hufflepuff,” James said. Regulus nodded understandingly.
The two boys settled into a comfortable silence as they walked, arms swinging between them. It didn’t take them long to arrive in the village, the street lamps casting a warm glow against the white snow. “Where do you want to go first?” Regulus asked. James shrugged, pulling on Regulus’ hand and bringing the other boy closer to him. “I’m kind of craving a Butterbeer, wanna head to the Three Broomsticks?” James asked.
“Sure,” Regulus said, and they trudged through the snow and walked into the warm pub. Regulus walked towards the back of the building, sitting down at a secluded table. He shrugged his trench coat off, setting it down on the chair next to him. He adjusted his sweater and white button-down, pushing his hair out of his eyes and leaning back against the chair.
James walked up to the counter and ordered two Butterbeers, grabbing the mugs once they were ready and carefully walking them back to the table Regulus was sitting at. James set the mugs down on the table, tugging his scarf and jacket off similarly to how Regulus had. He slid into the chair, taking a long drink out of his mug. “So, you come here often?” James flirted teasingly. Regulus grinned, shaking his head as he took a sip of his drink.
“Very funny, Potter.” He said. A short silence fell over the two as they enjoyed their warm mugs filled to the brim with Butterbeer.
“Do you think we’ll tell Sirius about us?” James asked.
Regulus bit his bottom lip, sighing softly. “Eventually, I’d like to.”
James smiled softly. “I would too,” James said, taking another drink. “I do understand why you’re hesitant. Sirius had a fit when he found out I had my first kiss and didn’t tell him,” James said. Regulus laughed, smiling at James from across the table.
“Same here. When he found out I had my first kiss through a drunken game of truth or dare, I think he nearly passed out.” Regulus said. James, who had begun taking a sip of his Butterbeer, nearly spat it out at Regulus’ words.
Regulus laughed loudly, throwing his head back as James choked on the drink, wiping his face with a napkin. “Drunk truth or dare?” James asked, after he had calmed himself down.
Regulus nodded. “Yeah, it was after a Quidditch match versus Hufflepuff. We won, got drunk after the game, played truth or dare, and I ended up having to kiss some random fourth year.” He said. James gawked at Regulus. “Wow. When was that?” James asked.
The other boy’s brow furrowed as he thought. “Uh,” He said, scratching the side of his nose. “Third year, I think?” He said.
“Little Regulus Black played drunk truth or dare after a Quidditch match. Wow. Such a rebellious man.” James teased.
Regulus rolled his eyes. “What about you, pretty boy? Have you been charming Gryffindors since you strutted onto the Hogwarts express your first year?” Regulus asked, taking a drink of his butterbeer.
James rolled his eyes. “Shut up,” He teased, a deep flush on his cheeks. “Uh, mine was in my third year as well. I don’t remember her name, but I remember her having a crush on me and me being desperate to get a girlfriend.” He said. “Clearly that worked out well.”
Regulus giggled. “Oh, clearly. With all the girls you’re bringing back to the dorms.” Regulus joked. The two boys sat in the pub for about an hour before they bundled back into their coats and scarves, braving the cold walk towards Scrivenshafts. Regulus picked out two new containers of ink, and James grabbed a few new Quills so he could give Regulus his back. After Scrivenshafts, they headed to Honeydukes, Zonkos, and Dervish and Banges so James could pick up some new broom polish.
Bellies full of Butterbeer, and hands full of school supplies, the two boys headed back towards the large castle looming in the distance, laughing and joking the whole way back.
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December 5th, 1976
Focus, Potter, focus!
Eyes trained on the Quaffle sailing towards him, he reached out and grabbed it, holding it tightly under his arm as he flew towards the massive hoops. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted a flash of green with dark hair shoot past him, a flash of bright red quickly following. Both the Gryffindor and Slytherin seekers had spotted the snitch, and Gryffindor was down 155 to 175 against Slytherin. James quickly let the quaffle fly through the hoop, sailing past the Slytherin’s keeper and scoring another point for his team.
“Gryffindor scores, bringing the total up to 165 for Gryffindor, 175 to Slytherin!” The Announcer exclaimed. The match had been intense up to this point, but the two teams somehow stayed neck and neck in terms of points. James’ eyes darted around the pitch, searching for the other chasers on his team. After a few more minutes, James scored yet another point for Gryffindor, which put the two houses at a tie. James cheered as his team scored, eyes darting around the pitch to find Regulus, who was neck and neck with Gryffindor’s seeker for the snitch. In what felt like an eternity, he watched as Regulus was nearly knocked off of his broom, and the Gryffindor seeker grabbed the snitch, ending the game.
Loud cheers erupted from the stands, deafening James as he watched Regulus pull the hair tie out of his hair and scowl at the Gryffindor seeker.
“Good game, yeah?” The seeker said jokingly, smirking at Regulus. “Fuck off, prat,” Regulus mumbled, flying down to the grass and quickly walking towards the changing room.
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Later that night…
James couldn’t remember the last time he was this drunk. Currently, he was sitting on one of the plush couches in the Gryffindor common room, nestled in between Regulus and Marlene. Marlene had her head laying on James’ shoulder, and James had his head laying on Regulus’ shoulder. Sirius slumped down into one of the arm chairs, Remus perching himself in his boyfriend's lap. “Lads,” He exclaimed. “I think we should play ‘spin the bottle’.”
Regulus quirked an eyebrow up, shifting under the weight of his drunk boyfriend. “I’m down,” He said. James nodded, holding a finger up in agreement. Marlene followed shortly after. “Right, Wormy, grab an empty bottle please!” Sirius exclaimed. Peter quickly chugged the rest of his beer, setting the bottle down on the ground. The group of friends, which consisted of the Marauders, Regulus, Marlene, Dorcas, Mary, and Lily, all sat cross legged on the ground around the bottle.
Sirius was up first, after making sure that Remus was okay with everything. Unsurprisingly, he ended up having to kiss Remus, which resulted in most of the people at the party groaning in embarrassment. Mary kissed Peter, and Marlene kissed Dorcas. Next up was Lily. She reached out, pushing a strand of her bright red hair out of her eyes, and let the bottle spin on the carpet. As the bottle slowed, it landed on Regulus, who looked up at her with a small flush on his cheeks.
“Alright, let’s get it over with,” Lily said, sitting up on her knees. Regulus straightened up, leaning to meet Lily in the middle. His lips pressed against hers; they were soft, like she had just put lip balm on a few moments earlier. They kissed for a few moments, before Regulus felt the back of his shirt being tugged on.
“No fair, I wanna kiss Reg,” James whined, pulling Regulus out of the kiss. He pulled him back down, kissing him passionately, as Lily watched in shock.
Regulus quickly pulled away, eyes wide in shock. “James, what the fuck?” Regulus asked, and James seemingly sobered up incredibly fast. Well, not entirely- his eyes were still half lidded and his pupils were blown out, but it seemed like he got a grip on what he just did.
Across the group, Sirius was fucking fuming. Remus reached over and tried to grab Sirius’ hand, but before he could, Sirius stood up and pointed at Regulus. “You…and, and you…” He said, pointing between James and Regulus. “How…wh…how long has this been going on?” Sirius demanded.
Regulus swallowed hard, trying his best to keep James steady beside him. “Sirius-,”
“Spit it out, Regulus.” Sirius demanded.
Regulus froze, his heart rate speeding up when Sirius called him by his full name. He sighed, looking down at the ground. “Since September.” He said quietly.
Sirius ran his fingers through his hair. “September.” He echoed, taking a deep breath before stomping off towards the dorms. Remus followed quickly behind, most likely to try and calm his boyfriend down before Sirius killed his best friend.
The group sat for a few moments, before Regulus cleared his throat. “Uh, well,” he said. “Now you know. James and I are dating.” he finished.
Dorcas rolled her eyes. “Yeah, and you’re about to get murdered by your best friend ‘cause you’re shagging his little brother.”
James flushed bright red. “We’re not shagging, Dorcas, we’re just dating.”
“Yeah, okay,” Dorcas said sarcastically, making the group laugh softly. The group settled back into a calm conversation as the party died down. The girls went back to their dorms, and James walked Regulus back down to the dungeons.
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“Pads, can you please calm down?” Remus asked. Sirius was pacing around the dorm room, running his fingers through his hair nervously. “Moony, I just found out that my brother and my best friend have been dating for three months behind my back. I’m sorry that I’m a little stressed about that!” Sirius exclaimed, throwing his arms up in the air.
Remus groaned, running his hands over his face. “Pads, please, it’s not like they were hiding it very well!” He said. “For fuck’s sake, Pads, we saw them holding hands walking to Hogsmeade together!”
“That could have been anything! How was I supposed to know that James is shagging my little brother?” Sirius exclaimed. “Out of all the people, James goes for my baby brother. What the hell are they even doing?” He said.
“You seem to be forgetting that Regulus is old enough to choose who he wants to date now. If he wants to date James, then that’s fine. It might suck, but Regulus is a big kid. He’s smart enough to know if James is using him,” Remus said.
Sirius sighed, running his hands over his face. “I just…I can’t. It feels like I just got Reggie back, and he’s already gone again,” Sirius said quietly. “I know that’s not the truth, but it just hurts a lot, y’know? Reggie and I spent tons of time together over the summer, but it feels like James is getting all the time with him since they both play Quidditch, and I guess since they’re dating,” He said.
Remus nodded. “So you miss him?” He asked.
Sirius blinked a few times. “Yeah. I do. And I just want to make sure that he’s making the best decision for himself. I mean, not long ago, James was fawning over Lily every hour he was awake. And now he’s dating Regulus, y’know? I just want him to be safe.” Sirius said, sitting down on the edge of his bed. Remus scooted closer to his boyfriend, letting Sirius lay his head on his shoulder.
Remus was quiet for a moment. “Sirius, you need to talk to Regulus about this.” Remus said.
Sirius sighed, chewing on his bottom lip. “Yeah,” He said quietly. “I do.”
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December 6th, 1976
The morning after the party was slow, to say the least. Most of the Gryffindors didn’t show up for breakfast, James included. Regulus frowned as he noticed his boyfriend’s empty seat at the Gryffindor table. Grabbing his fork, he pushed a piece of bacon around his plate for a few moments, appetite suddenly gone.
“So, Black. I heard you and Potter are shagging, yeah?” Evan Rosier said, making Regulus look up from his plate. He rolled his eyes, pushing a piece of his long black hair out of his eyes. “Piss off, Rosier,” Regulus mumbled.
Evan laughed. “I’m not here to be an ass, Black. I just wanted to know if the rumors are true. Word spreads fast, you know.” He said, crossing his arms across his chest.
Regulus huffed. “No, Potter and I are not shagging. Why does everyone always say that?” He mumbled, pushing his plate of food towards the center of the table. He grabbed his bag, quickly leaving the Slytherin table before he did anything he might regret.
“Reggie!” Sirius called from behind him.
Regulus turned around, seeing his brother booking it down the hallway, leaving a very confused Remus at the entrance to the Great Hall.
He furrowed his brow curiously. “What do you want, Sirius?” He asked.
Sirius came to a stop in front of his brother, pushing his hair out of his eyes. “I wanted to talk to you about last night.”
Regulus scoffed. “If you’re here to berate me about my relationship, I’d rather not hear it.” He said, attempting to turn around and walk away.
Sirius reached out and grabbed Regulus’ arm, turning him back around. “Please, just listen to me. I promise it’s nothing bad,” Sirius asked. He stared into Regulus’ eyes, the ones that so closely mirrored his own, yet with those few slight differences that made Regulus...well, Regulus. Sirius’ leaned more towards blue, whereas Regulus’ leaned more towards a deep grey color.
“Fine.” Regulus said, and Sirius smiled weakly at his brother.
“Thank you,” Sirius said. “I know my reaction last night was…well, not great. I was very shocked. I know I should have said something, but I just couldn’t. But I just…I miss you, Reggie. I feel like I just got you back from our parents and you’re already gone again. And I want you to be safe. James isn’t a bad guy, but you’re my little brother, and I can’t help but worry about this relationship. Plus, I don’t want him deflowering my baby brother.” Sirius said, laughing at the end.
Regulus laughed, looking down at his hands. “If it provides any comfort, the flowers are still very much in tact.” Regulus said. “But…I don’t know if I love him yet. What I do know, however, is that James treats me incredibly well. And he makes me feel like I’m not just…Sirius’ little brother, or a blood traitor,” He said. “He makes me really happy. And I’m sorry that I’ve made you feel like I’m already gone again. I just got my big brother back, I’m not gonna let you leave again.” He said.
Sirius blinked, a few tears falling down his cheek. “He makes you happy?” He asked.
Regulus nodded, looking back up at Sirius. “He really does, Siri,” He said quietly.
A sigh left Sirius’ lips. “I…I’m still not thrilled about the relationship,” He said. “But I trust you. I know you can make smart decisions. And if you know he’s treating you well, then I believe you. But if he does anything shitty, you’ll let me know immediately, okay?” Sirius asked, reaching out to brush a tear away from Regulus’ cheekbone.
Regulus nodded, wiping his eyes with the sleeve of his robe. “I promise,” He said. “And you have full permission to kick James’ ass if you feel like you need to.” Regulus joked, smiling warmly at his big brother.
Sirius wiped the tears from his cheeks away, laughing softly. “Come here, you big loser,” He said, pulling Regulus into a tight hug. “I love you, little star,” He mumbled in Regulus’ ear.
“I love you too, Siri,” Regulus responded, hugging his brother as tight as possible. “You might want to let James know that you’re not mad at him, though. I’m pretty sure he’s convinced he’s going to die by your hand.” Regulus teased, which made Sirius laugh loudly.
“Okay, I’ll talk to him later today,” Sirius said, pulling away from the hug. “What are you doing tonight? We’re gonna be hanging out in the common room if you want to join us.”
Regulus smiled softly. “Uh, just studying, but I can do that with you guys,” He said, smiling.
“Brilliant,” Sirius said, grinning. “See you after dinner?”
“Yeah, see you then.” Regulus said, smiling at his brother one final time before turning to head back to his dorm.
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December 14th, 1976
A heavy chill had fallen over Hogwarts. The black lake was frozen over, a thick layer of frost covered the walkways. Regulus woke up that morning, eyes groggy and heavy lidded. He sat up in his bed, stretching his arms out above his head. He rubbed his eyes for a few moments before climbing out of the warm cocoon of his blankets, heading towards the trunk at the end of his bed. Regulus had a late start this morning; his first class didn’t begin until about an hour after breakfast was over, so he was thankful he didn’t have to wear his robes to breakfast this morning. He was also thankful that all of his dorm mates had left, presumably for an early morning Quidditch practice he couldn’t be bothered to go to.
He pulled out a black sweater and a pair of trousers, pulling them on, along with his regular shoes. He pulled his hair back into a bun, huffing as a few of the shorter strands by his face wouldn’t cooperate. Eventually he gave up, deciding he’d deal with it later, and he trudged sleepily down towards the Great Hall.
As he walked in, he immediately felt the intense stares of most of the Slytherin students. He made his way to his regular spot towards the end of the table, filling his plate up with the food displayed in front of him. Eventually, he saw a letter come dropping down beside him. He looked up, stomach filling with dread as he looked at the owl that had delivered it. It was his Father’s.
Regulus spared a glance towards the Gryffindor table, seeing Sirius staring straight back at him. He swallowed hard, tearing the letter open carefully to see his father’s scrawled handwriting covering the parchment.
With shaky hands, Regulus folded the letter back up, stuffing it into his pocket. He stared down at his plate, terrified to look up and see Sirius staring back at him again. Anxiety pooled in his chest; if he saw Sirius at all today, he knew he would ask about the letter. The same thing would happen with James. His hands began to shake more, forcing him to drop his fork down onto the table. With silver eyes, welled up with tears, Regulus stood up and walked out of the Great Hall as swiftly as possible.
Sirius perked up when he saw Regulus leaving, worry washing over his features. James raised an eyebrow at him, turning to see what Sirius was staring at.
“What’s up, Pads?” James asked, mouth full of toast.
Remus grimaced. “At least wait until you’re finished eating to ask.”
James simply stuck his middle finger up at Remus, making him laugh under his breath.
“Regulus got a letter,” Sirius mumbled, eyes still trained towards the archway of the hall. “I didn’t see who’s owl delivered it, but he seems pretty messed up about it.”
“What do you mean?” James asked, voice dripping with concern.
“He made eye contact with me, read the letter, sat there for a few moments and then got up and stormed out,” Sirius said.
James nodded. “I’m seeing him tonight after practice, so I can ask him about it if you don’t get the chance to before then.” James said, taking a sip of his water.
Sirius nodded. “I just…I hope he’s okay, y’know?” He said. Remus laid his head on Sirius’ shoulder comfortingly.
James chewed on his bottom lip and pushed his glasses up on his nose. The winter holidays began tomorrow; and Walburga’s threat weighed heavily on everyone’s mind. Remus had even convinced his parents to let him stay with the Potters over the holidays to make sure Regulus was safe. To say he was terrified would be an understatement.
“I think I’m gonna go find him and see if he’s okay,” James announced, grabbing his bag from the bench next to him. “You sure? Do you want us to come?” Sirius asked. James shook his head, putting his bag on. “Nah. You guys stay here, and make sure you eat enough today, alright?” James said. Sirius rolled his eyes. “Yes mother,” Sirius teased, making James roll his eyes.
James walked briskly out of the hall, spotting Regulus turning down a familiar corridor. He sighed knowingly; Regulus was going to the astronomy tower, where they typically met when they wanted to be alone. James followed Regulus all the way to the top of the tower, watching as Regulus ripped the hair tie out of his hair in frustration.
“Reg?” James asked softly.
Regulus turned around to look at James, tears in his eyes. “James.” He said quietly. The two boys stared at each other for a few moments, before their bodies collided, James’ arms wrapped tightly around Regulus. “What happened?” James asked quietly, running his fingers through Regulus’ dark hair.
The other boy sniffled a few times, tears streaming down his cheeks. “I…” He whispered. “I got a letter.”
“From who?” James asked, pulling away and cupping Regulus’ face in his hands.
Regulus wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his sweater, reaching into his pocket and handing the letter to James. James grabbed it, reading the words out loud.
Regulus,
Your mother and I will be waiting to collect you tomorrow. Be ready. I am not inclined to take pity on you, and you know how much your mother despises waiting.
Orion Black
The Ancient and Noble House of Black
“He’s going to be at the station tomorrow. Or, worse, he’ll just show up here,” Regulus whispered. “I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to avoid them.”
“We’ll figure it out, Reg,” James said, folding the letter back up.
“How?” Regulus exclaimed. “I don’t think the idea you came up with is going to work anymore, James.” He said, grabbing the letter out of James’ hands. “Orion Black will stop at nothing, nothing to get what he wants. He wants me to become a Death Eater. Apperating from Dumbledore’s office to your parent’s house won’t stop him!” Regulus said.
James sighed, running his fingers through his hair. “I don’t know, okay? I don’t know how to stop your father,” He exclaimed. “But I do know that I can’t fucking lose you, Regulus. Neither can Sirius. We’ll figure this out, together,” James said, reaching out and grabbing one of Regulus’ hands in his own.
“We’ll figure this out, okay? I promise.” James said.
Regulus stared into James’ eyes for a few moments, tears still streaming down his face. “Okay.” He whispered, his voice cracking.
James smiled softly. “I have Quidditch practice tonight. I know we were supposed to see each other, but I think you should stay in the Gryffindor dorms with us for the night. For safety,” He said. “And, uh, also because I miss you.”
Regulus gave James a weak smile, nodding slowly. “Yeah. I miss you too,” He said. Regulus cleared his throat, stuffing the letter back into the pocket of his trousers. “I should go get ready for classes. I’ll see you tonight, yeah?” He said.
“Are you sure you’ll be okay alone?” James asked.
Regulus smiled; it was feeble, and bordering on fake, but it was a smile nonetheless. “Yeah, I’ll be okay.” He promised.
James nodded hesitantly. “Okay,” He said. “See you tonight.”
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Later that night…
“Great job out there, guys. There’s tons of improvement coming from everyone. I believe our next practice is the second Tuesday after we come back from holidays? I’ll double check that later. But good job everyone, and have a great holiday,” James said, smiling at his team mates. Everyone trudged back to the locker rooms to change, their brooms dragging against the snow covered grass. James sighed to himself, running his fingers through his hair and adjusting his glasses on his nose, before following behind the large group of teens.
“James!” He heard someone exclaim behind him. He turned around, seeing Sirius, Remus, and Peter running up to him, Marauders map gripped tightly in their hands.
“Woah, woah,” James said, holding his hands up to stop Sirius. “What the hell, guys, what’s wrong?” He asked.
Remus held the map out to James. “Look in the dungeons,” He said.
James stared at the map, searching through the dungeons. “What about them?”
Sirius rolled his eyes. “You bloody idiot, Regulus isn’t there.” He said, pointing to where Regulus’ dorm would be.
Normally, towards the back end of the Slytherin dorms, a small banner with the name Regulus Black would be residing in the space. But it wasn’t. And it wasn’t in the library, or the kitchens, or the Great Hall, or the Astronomy tower. Fear bubbled in James’ chest, eyes widening in shock.
“Fuck,” James muttered. “Shit, this is bad. Let me put my gear away and I’ll be back.” He rushed out, sprinting to the locker rooms to strip himself of his gear. He tore his uniform off, quickly changing back into his normal clothes. James haphazardly threw his kit into his locker, slamming it shut and sprinting back out to the field. He knew his team would get mad at him for causing such a disturbance, but he couldn’t care less. His Regulus, the one who promised to stay in the Gryffindor dorms that night to keep him safe, was not on Hogwarts property.
Regulus was gone.