September 1st, 1998
She didn’t understand how it happened. Truthfully, if someone had told her when she had gotten her Hogwarts letter for the first time that within the next twenty years, she’d have lived through two wars, gained and lost the best people she had ever met, had to raise the son of one of her closets friends, had another close friend go to Azkaban for twelve years for being falsely accused of murder, losing the love of her life trying to right the wrongs of his family- she’d have laughed it off. She’d think that it was a plotline to a series that she’d never heard of.
But as she stood at the end of a row of concrete headstones, she knew that it was no story. It was her life. It was their lives. It was the life of the boy standing next to her.
“C’mon, Aunt Hermione,” The taller boy mumbled, grasping at her head to tug her along the names of the unknown people until they both stopped at the first of five graves.
LILY JADE EVANS
01/30/1960 - 10/31/1981
Hermione gave a thinely veiled smile as she gently touched the concrete headstone that held the name of the first female friend she made when she stepped onto the Hogwarts Express.
The small eleven year old had a gaping mouth as she took in the train all around her. She had only made her way passed a few compartments when she ran head-first into what looked like another first year, realizing that she was too enamored with the details, colors, noises and even smells that she wasn’t watching where she was going.
“Oomf! Oh dear, I’m so sorry! Here let me help you!” Hermione exclaimed, rushing onto her knees to pick up a leather satchel that had tumbled over, spilling parchment, quills and a few paperback books. “I was too focused on the train, I didn’t mean to bump into you!”
“Thanks! Wait- are you a first year too? So am I! My name is Lily! I was just searching for an empty compartment for myself and my best friend Sev, would you like to sit with us?” A girl who was just an inch or two shorter than Hermione rambled, flashing her a bright smile. At Hermione’s nod, she turned around, letting her brilliant red hard catch the sunlight.
“Lily…” She breathed, sucking in a breath. She blinked, laying a hand on Harry’s shoulder, needing his presence to ground her.
The boy stood taller than her at 5’10. She was the first and most often one to tell him how much he looked like his parents, messy black hair that couldn’t be controlled no matter what, bright green eyes that reflected every feeling that he couldn’t hold back, his tan skin reflecting handsomely in the sunlight. Harry James Potter looked almost identical to James, his father but he was smart, he was witty, he was amazing at his wand work. His looks may reflect James, but hiis brains reflect his mother, Lily.
Hermione moved her hand across his shoulder blades, effectively wrapping her arm around him, tugging him into her embrace. She knew that he’d need her as much as she’d need him.
This was their first time visiting them all since the battle. Their first time seeing these five graves all together.
“Mum…” Harry whispered, sliding down to his knees in front of the pearly white stone that bore the name of a brilliant witch.
Hermione gave him a few moments to himself as she moved onto the next headstone. She swallowed thickly, her chest tightening. She leaned her head back, facing the sun that beat down onto them.
It was the first of September, the only day that felt right to visit the cemetery for the first time. Despite Hermione living only a few blocks away, she made a point to go the long way into town so as to not pass it and be confronted with memories she wasn’t ready to face.
The months after the war were busy. She was tasked with helping her god-son stand in court for every single trial of the Death Eaters that were caught. She was brought in as a witness for crimes committed by those standing trial in both Wizarding Wars as she was one of the very few that was alive and willing to be questioned relentlessly.
Kingsley Shacklebolt was appointed Minister for Magic within two months so he could no longer stand trial, Molly and Arthur Weasley were mourning their son Fred, Andromeda was mourning both her daughter and the end of her family line. Augusta Longbottom had been killed during the battle; Hermione wasn’t even aware the older woman had shown up until she saw Neville Longbottom fall to his knees in anguish in the Great Hall.
She had shown up to every single funeral, paying her respects to the fallen. She refused to figure out which war had more casualties, more innocent lives stolen away.
JAMES FLEAMONT POTTER
03/27/1960 - 10/31/1981
“I’ll take the lot!” A short boy with messy black hair piped up. Hermione had gotten requests from Lily and Severus for sweets and she agreed to go find the sweets trolley that she had heard about by Severus.
She furrowed her brows and crossed her arms in front of her chest as she took in his crooked glasses, a grin that took up half his face and wrinkled burgundy button up top.
Annoying.
“I don’t think so!” She hit back, lifting up an eyebrow as she walked closer to the trolley. She flashed a smile at the older woman and dug out the coins that Lily and Sev gave her for their treats. “I’ll take two sugar quills- a strawberry and cherry, three pumpkin pasties and two chocolate frogs!”
“Hey! You can’t do that! I claimed dibs!” The boy said, giving her a challenging grin.
“If you can tell me what that means, I’d gladly give my treats to you.”
“Oh-I-erm, shit.”
“Language, young man!” The sweets lady scolded him, putting her hands to her hips as she shot him a half hearted glare.
“I’m sorry! That slipped out!”
“I miss you, Jamie,” Hermione mumbled, biting her bottom lip, the tip of her nose burning with the effort to keep her tears away.
She cleared her throat and took out her wand. Muttering a few charms had the ground in front of James and Lily’s graves turned up, a few purple tulip seeds for Lily and a few white daisy seeds for James were planted and in the timespan in a blink, the flowers were fully grown. Three flowers directly in front of their headstones. The other three graves would get the same treatment.
She gazed at the white stone for a few more moments before moving onto the third one.
REMUS JOHN LUPIN
03/10/1960 - 05/02/1998
“Hiya! I’m Hermione Granger, and you are…?” The bushy haired eleven year old thrust out her hand to a tall, thin, lanky boy with curious scars all over his face.
As the light brunette boy hesitantly shook her hand, she realized he also had scars on his palms and the back of his hand.
“Remus, Remus Lupin,” He spoke, clearing his throat.
“Who names their son ‘wolf’ ‘wolf’?” The boy with the lopsided glasses asked, cocking his head to the side slightly.
A few swishes of her wand and a few nonverbal spells had pink peonies growing before she knelt down in front of Remus’s headstone.
“You were supposed to be here, you dick.” Hermione’s voice broke on the last word as the tears finally fell free, sliding down her red cheeks. “How can you leave me? Leave Harry? He needs you, Remus! I bloody need you.”
She slapped her hand over her mouth as she leaned against the stone, her shoulders trembling as she worked to keep her sobs inside her.
After James and Lily died, Harry had been given to Petunia and Vernon Dursley, Lily’s muggle sister and brother-in-law. He was only with them for two months before they had gotten into a car crash. Dumbledore was forced to give Harry over to Hermione and Remus. Hermione was his godmother and his godfather was in Azkaban- Remus was the only one left.
After the death of James and Lily, Mary left for the muggle world. She couldn’t handle the grief of losing James, Lily, Marlene, Dorcas, Sirius, Peter, as well as Alice and Frank.
Hermione and Remus were the only people to give Harry the love he deserved. They gave him his best chance in this world.
Hermione and Remus had spent 17 years together, raising their best friends’ son, grieving their own lost loves and healing together…
She looked over at the next grave, placing a hand on its side, the tears dripping down her face as she took in the name of her next dead friend.
SIRIUS ORION BLACK
11/03/1959 - 06/18/1996
A loud snort came from the boy who sat next to Remus. “Merlin’s balls, that’s almost as bad as my name!”
“Yeah? What’s yours?” Remus asked, dropping Hermione’s hand and turning to the boy. He face was ever so slightly chubby while a straight nose, dark eyes that Hermione couldn’t figure out the color of in the dark, and full lips that were spread in a smirk. He was just as pale as the other two boys in the small rocking boat.
Was that a wizarding trait? Surely not as wizards were white… She looked down at her own tan skin with a frown.
“Sirius Orion Black, at your service!” He smirked, glancing at the boy next to Hermione who let out peals of laughter.
“And yours?” She asked, finally giving the boy her actual attention once more after the trolley incident. He and Sirius had found her directly after getting off the train, Remus was the last one on the boat.
“James Potter!”
She remembered how insanely worried she was when she woke up to The Prophet announcing Sirius Black’s escape from Azkaban. How she almost didn’t let Harry go to Hogwarts that year, in fact, Remus and her got into a large spat over it.
It was only because Remus was also going back to Hogwarts, that she allowed him to go.
Imagine her surprise, after all the letters written between her, Harry and Remus, all the warnings for Harry to not go looking for him, for Remus to watch him like a hawk, that he ignored every word she said, and found himself face to face with his parents murderer.
Remus had opened his floo that night, knowing word would get out that Harry found Sirius (or, Sirius found Harry) and she’d be by first thing. After checking with Ron Weasley and Remus in the hospital wing and hearing the story not once, not twice but three separate times by Remus, Dumbledore and Harry, Hermione herself had found herself face to face with Sirius.
Granted, he was chained to the wall of a wide open tower.
It took a long time for Remus, Sirius and Hermione to heal and to trust each other again, but with Harry as the glue, they soon found themselves laughing and telling stories about their time at Hogwarts more often than not.
Remus had his love back and she couldn’t be happier for him.
Hermione blinked, coming back to herself after falling into her memories when three red snapdragons grew in front of Sirius’s headstone. She looked up at her godson, noticing the tear tracks on his cheeks and the tears still lining his bright green eyes.
He held out his hand and helped her up before inching their way to the fifth and final grave.
She closed her eyes tightly, her chest feeling like it was caving into itself as she turned into Harry’s arms, wrapping her arms around his torso while he held her tightly.
REGULUS ARCTURUS BLACK
06/13/1961 - 07/01/1979
“Everyone! I would like you all to meet my younger brother! Be nice to him, or I’ll prank you!” Sirius said, slamming open the door to the compartment of the Hogwarts Express. It was the beginning of their second year, and apparently the first year of Sirius’s brother. Hermione, James, Remus and Peter all paused their conversations to look over at the boy who was smiling widely. His right arm was held out, probably grasping at this younger brother of his. “Come on, Reg!”
He tugged in a boy who was only about two inches shorter than himself. Black hair, pale, straight nose, thinner face than Sirius had last year, he was just as lanky and thin as Sirius though. His black hair was curly, unlike his older brother, his face was pointy.
“This is Regulus Black, my most wonderful younger brother, hopefully the next bane of our mothers’ existence!”
Harry slowly knelt down on the grass, pulling her down along with him. He kissed her forehead, leaning his head down on top of hers as he gazed at the grave of a man he never met.
Sirius never talked about him, in fact the only reason he knew of his existence was because Sirius had shown him his family’s tapestry. He recalled his godfather's eyes flickering up to Regulus’ name before he vanished whatever emotion had clouded his eyes.
Regulus’s name was only spoken by Hermione when she was drunk or by Remus when he was reminiscing about Sirius, his fiancé. They never had the chance to get married, neither did Hermione or Regulus- though they never even got engaged.
He was told that Regulus had given Hermione a promise ring that he took from his family vault, triple checked for curses before paying a hefty sum to layer protection charms onto it before he gave it to her.
She never took it off her ring finger.
Harry waved his wand, growing three yellow roses from the ground.
“‘Mione?” He asked softly, running his fingers up and down her arm.
Her sobs had broken loose, making it hard for her to breathe. It felt like her chest had been ripped open, like her heart had fallen out.
It suddenly felt all too real.
She knew he was dead, she knew the moment Sirius had gotten the letter from Andromeda, the moment his face fell before hardening, the moment his jaw flexed as he ground his teeth.
She knew that he would die the moment he had told her the plan, the moment he had come to her with urgent news regarding Voldemort, the moment she knew of the Dark Lord’s secret, she knew that he would die.
She truly thought her heart wrenching sobs 19 years ago was the beginning of the pain, she thought every sleepless night, curled up against Remus, Sirius, Peter, James or even Lily was the beginning of her grieving. She thought every reminder of Regulus, from the stars, to the books, to his plain tea, to that odd smell that smelled like him, was the beginning of her healing.
She truly thought she wasn’t grieving. She truly thought she was simply nostalgic.
The sobs that wrecked her body now said otherwise.
She pulled away from Harry’s grasp, grabbed her wand and swished it, letting an engraving crave itself into her lover’s headstone. Their favorite quote, one that she never truly understood until now, until she lost everything, until she lost him.
“How evergreen, our group of friends, don't think we'll say that word again.”
He had found it in a book titled Evermore by Taylor Swift , an author she never heard of before, deep within the confines of the Black library and showed it to her.
“I’ll miss you, every day, every hour, every minute, Regulus, and I’ll love you twice as long.”