Chapter 36
"Harry, can you hand me that wrench please?" Tony asked, bent under the popped hood of a car.
"That's the... all silver one with the mouth looking thing?" Harry's hand hovered over a variety of tools that were lying atop a small table.
Tony smiled to himself, thinking about how adorable Harry was, and nodded. "Yeah, the all silver one with the mouth looking thing."
Harry handed the wrench to Tony, who resumed his tinkering.
"Sir, you have an incoming phone call," Friday's voice announced.
"Who's calling?" Tony grunted, pulling some wiring out with a yank.
"It's your lawyer," Friday responded in her Irish accent.
Tony took a step back and stood up, grabbing a towel and wiping his oiled and greased hands off quickly before grabbing his phone and answering.
"This is Tony Stark," he answered, and Harry gingerly took a seat on a stool. He had completed PT this morning, and it had left him beyond sore. The scarring on his back was becoming quite restrictive as it healed, and so they were trying to help with that as much as possible. However, it meant that Harry was exhausted and sore.
"That soon?" Tony asked, his voice quiet but surprised. "No, that's good but... I thought we would have more time to prepare."
There was silence on the other end as someone responded. Tony glanced over a Harry who looked down at his hands, pretending he wasn't listening.
"No, we're ready but I just worry about..." Tony trailed off, and there was another pause. "Okay, just keep me updated. We'll be in touch."
Tony pulled the phone from his ear and set it back down on the table with a sigh. Walking over towards the kitchenette area he had in the shop, he opened the fridge and pulled out two bottles of soda before returning to where Harry was seated.
"That was my lawyer, obviously, calling to tell me that they set a trial date," he handed Harry a bottle of Sprite.
Harry's face paled, and his hands began trembling as he accepted the bottle of soda.
"When?" He asked, clenching his jaw to keep his emotions at bay.
"Two weeks from tomorrow," Tony replied, voice low.
He had thought that they had more time to get Harry emotionally and mentally prepared for the trial. While he was glad that the case had received a priority, he was hoping that Harry would be in a better place once the trial came around. And while his kid was doing better, he worried about how well he would hold up in a court of law, being questioned from several sides.
Including a side that was attempting to re-grant custody to his aunt.
"Hey, it's alright. You're going to be alright, I'm not going to let anything happen to you," Tony hushed as the bottle of Sprite fell from Harry's shaking hands.
Harry reached out and grasped Tony's hand in a panic, squeezing it four times. Remembering how Peter had told him about the warning system that they use, Tony sprung into action.
"Hey, shh, you're alright," Tony soothed, lifting Harry off of the stool lightly and gently setting him on the ground so he was resting against the wall. The last thing either of them needed was Harry falling off of the stool and hurting himself.
"Deep breaths. Breathe. Breathe," Tony coached, "you're alright. It's okay, you're going to be alright."
Harry clutched at his chest, pulling his shirt away from his throat.
"Can't breathe," Harry wheezed.
"I know, buddy, but you're alright. Just try to take deep breaths and focus on me. Just keep your eyes on me."
Harry grasped at the front of Tony's shirt now, pulling the neckline so far down that his reactor could be seen glowing.
His hand reached out and touched the reactor, closing his eyes as he felt the soft warmth.
"There you go, you're alright. Just take some deep breaths," Tony soothed, brushing his thumb along Harry's temple.
"Wh-what i-if you- you can't hel-help me?" Harry sobbed, head feeling fuzzy and light. His stomach tossed and twisted in protest, making him nauseous.
"I'll make sure I can. I'll make sure to do everything in my power to keep you safe. No matter what," Tony wiped the tears from underneath Harry's glasses.
"Wha-what if-" Harry choked.
"Nope. We're not worrying about the what if's right now. We're focusing on you and your breathing. That's all," Tony soothed. "I'll teach you a trick that I always use to help me calm down."
Harry nodded furiously, his head bobbing up and down more times than necessary as he closed his eyes and tried to draw in a deep breath.
"What are five things you can see?" Tony questioned patiently, watching as Harry's eyes opened and darted around the room for a moment.
"You... stool... car... drin-drinks... tools," Harry responded breathlessly, a choked sob accompanying his answer.
"Okay, good. Four things you can touch?" Tony coaxed, grabbing at Harry's hand and holding it to his chest so that Harry could feel his heart and the reactor. That seemed to be helping him calm down quicker than usual, so whatever worked, he would make sure to use.
"You... shirt... floor... wall," Harry moved his free hand, touching everything that he listed.
"Good job, kid. How about three things you can hear?"
"You-your voice..." Harry closed his eyes and listened. "Radio... my breath-breathing."
"Alright, now two things you can smell?"
Harry kept his eyes closed and took as deep a breath in through his nose as he could, focusing on what he could smell.
"Motor oil... leather," Harry responded, his breathing calming down a bit now.
"Perfect, buddy, you're doing great," Tony told him, noticing that Harry's breathing had almost returned to normal. "Okay, one thing you taste."
Harry shakily unscrewed the cap to the bottle of Sprite and took a long drink. His mouth felt as if it were made of cotton, and his throat was on fire from such labored breathing. The Sprite kind of burned, but it was a liquid and it helped soothe the fiery feeling that burned at the back of his throat.
"Sprite," Harry answered finally, setting the bottle down and twisting the cap back into place.
"Are you feeling alright? Need anything?" Tony winced sympathetically. "Here, I'll grab you some Advil."
He stood up and walked back to the kitchenette area, grabbing a bottle of Advil and a water, before bringing it back to Harry.
Accepting both thankfully, Harry tossed the pain medication into his mouth and washed it down with a swig of water.
"I'm sorry," Harry spoke finally, his voice hoarse.
"Nothing to apologize for," Tony explained gently.
"I just feel so stupid for... I don't even know. I just feel like I should be over this already. And I know that's not how it works, I know. But it just feels so stupid that Vernon is fucking dead, and I'm still scared of him. I'm scared of my aunt. I can't go back there, no matter if he's with her or not. I just don't understand why... why I'm so broken."
A tear dripped down Harry's face and splashed on to the scarred skin on his hand.
I must not tell lies.
"Harry, you are not broken. Not one bit. You've lived an extremely traumatic life, full of shitty people and fucking assholes, and you're still one of the kindest, most loving people that I've ever met. And I've met a lot of people."
"I just feel like things should be fixed now. Why can't I fix things? What's wrong with me, that even with all of this good in my life, I'm still so... so, fucked up?"
"Listen to me, son. You are not fucked up. Just... think of the people in your life- the good, and the bad- as puzzle pieces. Some people all fit together perfectly, and some just... don't. And sometimes you think a piece will fit, but it doesn't. Sometimes you try to force a piece to fit and it gets stuck. It's not where it belongs, and it's messing up the entire puzzle, and you just can't get it out. But once you finally can take it away, it disrupts the whole puzzle. And when you try to take away a piece that fits perfectly, you're incomplete without it.
"That's how people are, Harry. Everyone you meet plays a role in your life- every single one. You'll meet people that you think you'll be great friends with, and it just doesn't work out. You'll think people in your life should, theoretically, work, but they don't, and it disrupts everything. That's how your relatives were in your life. Theoretically, they should have loved you and cherished you, but that's not how it works out. But then come people like Peter, Pepper, Bruce, Steve, Bucky, Clint, Natasha, and I, and we help fill that space that was disrupted, and make it complete.
"And sometimes your life feels incomplete because you've lost important pieces, like your godfathers, your teachers and friends... Cedric. But that doesn't mean you're broken or fucked up. It just means, sometimes you have to make your own pieces. It'll never be perfect, or replace what you lost, but it's a start."
Tony reached out and gave Harry's hand a squeeze with one hand, and with the other, he cupped Harry's cheek in his palm.
"I love you kiddo, and I want you to know that you complete my puzzle. And I hope that maybe, just maybe, I can help complete yours."