The Suggestion
Standing alone in the dark, yet familiar room, you are starting to get worried. "What if he doesn't come this time? What if something happened?"
You start pacing around the room, unable to stay still, your mind full of questions that cannot be answered, when you hear a key turn. Grabbing your wand and pointing it towards the door, being ready to attack anyone who is entering has become second nature to you by now, the world becoming more dangerous as the days pass by.
You immediately lower your wand when you see the familiar boy with dark curls enter the room. Sighing with relief you rush the last few steps separating the two of you, almost crushing the tall boy in a hug while he closes the door using a locking charm so no one can enter the room.
"I thought something happened to you, I've been waiting for over an hour." Silently cursing yourself for not being able to hide the trembling in your voice.
"I'm sorry love. I've been held up."
You slowly lift your head and look into his eyes, noticing how hard the last few weeks, since you've last met, must have been for him.
"We need to talk."
The difference in his tone, absent of the usual softness, makes you take a step back. Afraid to ask, you look at him. Seeing him stand tensed in front of you, his face betraying the cold facade he tried to keep up.
It would have worked, if there was anyone else standing in front of him, but you know him too well not to notice the way his jaw clenched and his brows ever so slightly furrowed, waiting for an answer.
"What about?" This was all you could ask him, not knowing what had made him change in his demeanor. "We got through him joining the Death Eaters, it cannot be that bad.", you tried to reassure yourself.
His gaze wandered to his hands, seemingly contemplating on how to start this conversation. You waited for him to start. Patience, which is usually not your strongest trait, always seemed to be uncomplicated around Regulus, but right now the time he takes to form his words is starting to drive you insane.
Piercing gray eyes meet yours, when he starts to talk. "We can't see each other anymore. I kn-"
"You're not doing this to me right now.", you interrupt him in an attempt to make him change his mind. "He can't be serious. He really can't be."
"It's not safe for you to keep this going, once they find out, and they will find out, there is no way they will let you live." He tries to reach out to you, but you wouldn't let him touch you right now, too hurt to be able to bear this.
"So you don't think it's worth the risk? You are abandoning me just like that?", you scream at him, tears already forming in your eyes. Hoping aggression will swallow the upcoming breakdown.
You almost missed the flinch he tried to suppress, a reaction that you knew he would have after you started raising your voice. You are also aware that you are being unfair using one of his weaknesses like this, when all he aims to do is keep you safe, but you couldn't care less.
Right now all you feel is agony. It is tearing you apart and you want him to feel the same pain he just caused you.
Feeling a weight dropping besides you makes you realize that at some point you must have sat down on the bed across the room. It is Regulus who breaks the silence by carefully taking your hands into his, like he was afraid you'd be running away from him if he wasn't holding onto you.
"I will make up for everything, I promise. You'll have to trust me, you might be the only one who doesn't believe I am this horrible person everyone else sees in me.", he whispers beside you, staring at your intertwined hands.
"Okay."
"Okay?"
"You already know I trust you.", you reply in a whisper, everything else feels too heavy, too intense right now, "but I'm not letting you go back there alone."
He looks at you, the surprise over what you said evident on his face. "I can't let you come with me. They'll kill you out of spite, not to mention your brother took Sirius away from them. They also think you work for the Order. You know walking straight into their arms is insane, do you?", the worry in his voice was unmistakable, making you contemplate your idea. Even if it's only for a second.
Closing your eyes, looking away from him, you decide that you cannot leave him jet again. You had to be selfish this one time and go with him, regardless of the consequences.
"I've never told you this", starting to draw circles on his hand with your finger, having to draw a shaky breath before continuing, "but I have been asked to work as a double agent for the Order. Dumbledore somehow knows about us being close and asked me to use you to get closer to Voldemort."
"And you chose them over me didn't you?" he asked, shifting your gaze towards his face again, you see him focused on something across the room, appearing to avoid eye contact.
You know you shouldn't get tired of his mistrust against you, understanding the war has changed everyone and knowing his question is valid, but you can't help feeling this way.
"I did not", you explained as calmly as you are able to manage at this moment.
"I don't trust him like my family does. Don't you think it's weird how he uses us, people who just got out of school, to do his dirty work. He wouldn't help me to get out of it, if things escalate, I'd just be a useless toy, nothing more."
This revelation makes him look at you again, surprise visible in his eyes. But he remains silent, waiting for you to continue. Patience has always been his strong suit.
You stand up pacing around the room, releasing some of the energy that has built up in you. Not sure how to convince him to let you go with him.
Regulus stops you, placing his hands around your face, caressing your cheeks. You calm down instantly, he's had this effect on you ever since you got to know each other better.
"I know they don't trust me, but I could let Voldemort use legilimency to make him see that I turned Dumbledore's offer down and see that I am doing this for you and you only. You know I took Occlumency classes. I've already secured every secret memory. But please let me come with you."
"I can't let you leave me again.", you didn't say that out loud hoping the unsaid still found its way to him.
Pulling you into his chest, strong arms wrapping around you, the both of you stand there, not moving, wishing the moment would never end if you stayed like that.
After a moment passes he takes a step back, still being close enough for you to feel his breath on your face when he looks down at you.
"I must be entirely mental to agree to this. But I'll let you come with me. I will take you to Grimmauld Place first, since no one really knows where the Dark Lord is settled at the moment."
He couldn't help but let you go with him. The past few weeks without you, not knowing where you were and what the Order made you do were torturing him. Seeing you today, all tensed up in the abandoned house they've made their hiding spot, had him realize his plan of leaving you, the only person who ever really cared about him, was going to be more difficult than expected.
Glad you were the one making this insane proposal, because he would have never suggested such a thing and seeing now a ever so slight chance of never having to leave your side again.