Unexpected
“Who’re you?” House demanded, stopping dead in the doorway between his office and his teams.
At the table a lanky man with dark curly hair was sitting, his feet insolently resting on the table and a look of boredom on his face. His team was staring at him curiously. The man turned his head slightly, his eyes running over him slowly.
“You're not at all what I was expecting,” he murmured, a hint of amusement on his face. “Gregory House, I assume?”
“If I say no will you leave me alone?”
“No,” he replied bluntly, his aristocratic accent clipping the word.
“He's House,” he nodded at Foreman.
“No, he not.” the man countered, finally dropping his legs. “My name is Sirius Black.”
“I don't care.”
The man snorted, “Look mate, I need one signature, sighing away all your pesky little muggle rights to your daughter and I’ll be out of your hair.”
“His daughter?”
Sirius turned to the woman who had spoken, “Yes. Delightful little thing, rather terrifyingly clever. My partner and I intend to adopt her.”
“I don't have a daughter.” House countered, drawing his attention back.
“Huh. We wondered if you knew. You do.” Sirius produced a picture of a curly-haired girl from his pocket. “Hermione. As I said, delightful. Intelligent, rather ruthless when she chooses to be and yet with the biggest bleeding heart I've ever encountered. I gather her mother was a one night sort of deal following a breakup. She says she contacted you but you never replied.”
House eyed him warily, taking the photograph from his hands, vague recollections of a woman with similar hair to the girl filtering through his mind. “Assuming you're telling the truth, why are you here? I can't be on any birth certificates, I definitely didn't sign anything.”
“No. But…we needed to be sure you wouldn't resurface and claim rights later. It's…complicated.”
They jumped when two other people rushed into the room. “Sirius!”
The man grimaced “Remus.”
“What are you doing?”
“Well…” he trailed off, “Getting some paperwork signed?”
The second person had frozen, her eyes on House. “You're not what I expected,” she blurted in mimicry of the first man.
“I didn't expect you at all,” he countered, rather than reacting as he expected her eyes hardened, and her spine straightened.
“Yes, you made that quite clear,” she spat.
“Hermione.” Remus reached for her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.
“Hold on. You actually have a daughter?” he paused giving in to the pointed looks, “Eric Foreman.”
Sirius hummed, “To all intents and purposes he was a sperm donor and as soon as he signs this, we’ll be out of his hair.”
“Remind me why this is necessary?” Hermione muttered.
“Because Fudge is an arse with a grudge and we’d like not to give him ammunition?” Sirius suggested.
“We could just move him in with Rita,” she mumbled, making him snort.
“Difficult given his ah…lack of skills.”
She arched an eyebrow at him, “Because there isn't a really easy way around that? No one said he needed skills to be...helped to move in with her.”
“Terrifying,” Sirius smirked. “I do so love your less than sane tendencies Kitten.”
“Yes, means she fits right in,” Remus muttered, yelping as if someone had struck him seconds before Hermione smiled sweetly up at his narrowed eyes.
Everyone watched in confusion as Sirius laughed. “Insane and violent,” he grinned, “Kitten are you sure you're not biologically a Black?”
“I'm making Harry my favourite child,” Remus muttered peevishly.
“No you're not,” Hermione grinned, “Harry has no patience for the library.”
He sighed, hugging her back into his side. “Maybe the family madness is catching.”
“You picked him,” she muttered, “You've only yourself to blame.”
“Back to the point!” House interjected loudly.
“Ah yes,” Sirius thrust a document at him, “sign this.”
“No.”
“No?”
“No.” he turned, intending to walk away.
“Don't make me force you,” Sirius called, his face and stance utterly relaxed.
“You think you could?”
He smirked, “You have no idea. Now. Sign this and we’ll disappear.”
“But I don't want to,” he countered.
“Sign the form.” He spun at the sound of the girl's hard tone, eyeing her curiously.
“Why?”
“You don't want me.” she shrugged, “They do.”
“And your mother?”
“Is dead.”
House blinked at her, taking in her tense stance, the way she leaned into the second man for comfort, the way the first was watching her with concern and nodded slowly, holding out his hand for the paper. His team watched with astonishment as he scrawled his name at the bottom.
“Happy?” he checked sarcastically.
“Ecstatic,” she deadpanned. “Let's go.”
Sirius eyed him shrewdly, placing a card on the table. “If you ever decide you’d like to get in touch, you can reach us there.”
“I doubt it.”
He nodded sharply. “Just in case.”
House watched them as they walked out of the door, both men's arms wrapped around the girl, and he picked up the card, glancing at it once before dropping it into the bin.