More than
“Sirius…Sirius, what is that?”
Sirius froze as he shut the door behind him coming face to face with his boyfriend, not entirely sure he had the words for the clusterfuck the night had been. Tightening his hold on the bundle in his arms lest he drop it, he opened and closed his mouth uselessly before giving it up as a bad job, pushing past Remus gently and all but collapsing on the sofa.
“Sirius?” Remus demanded moving to stand in front of him, his eyes raking over him, cataloguing the injuries he hadn't yet healed.
“Right, I need you not to overreact,” Sirius begged, forcing himself to say something even as the words felt clumsy in his mouth.
“What have you done?” Remus’ scrutiny turned to fear.
Slowly Sirius manoeuvred the bundle in his arms away from his chest, watching Remus warily. He saw the moment astonished comprehension dawned on his face and his jaw dropped
“Is that….is that a baby?” Remus breathed his eyes on the wriggling infant in his boyfriend's arms.
“So…yes. But ah…I mean there is no but…” he sighed in resignation, “yes it's a baby.”
“Did you steal a baby?” Remus demanded his eyes never moving from the child.
“What? No! Godric Remus, of course, I didn't steal a baby!”
“Then where did it come from?” Remus howled.
Sirius seemed to slump, “Bella was there,” he whispered. “They've found a way to track muggleborns and they're….fuck…" he swiped angrily at his eyes as the horrors he’d witnessed came rushing back.
“They're targeting them,” Remus finished softly a look of nauseated understanding washing over him.
“Yes,” Sirius agreed, looking down at the baby who was blinking sleepily up at him in a way that melted his heart. He felt the sofa dip next to him as Remus sat down.
“What are you planning on doing with…ah…it?”
“Her,” Sirius corrected softly.
“Ok”. Remus blew out a breath, “what are you planning on doing with her?”
Turning to look at Remus beseechingly, Sirius pulled out his best puppy dog eyes, “Can't we keep her Moons?”
“Keep her?” Remus spluttered “but someone…surely…her family…I…”
“They murdered them, Remus. Bella murdered them we only just got there in enough time to stop them from getting her.”
“Fuck,” Remus hissed
“And if they put her into the Muggle system she’ll be miserable Moons,” Sirius continued, “you know she will and Lils and James want one and if we had one it might hurry them along and…gods, look at her.” Sirius smiled down at the tiny scrap of human in his arms before continuing softly, “I spoke to Minnie. After.”
“And?” Remus prompted, not sure where this was going.
“Her name's Hermione. She checked the book. And damn it! She's four weeks old and I…just look at her.”
“Alright,” he agreed softly, trying to ignore how terrifying those words were but utterly unable to deny Sirius anything that put that look on his face. “I’m not sure this isn't an awful idea, but alright.”
“Really?” Sirius's head shot up.
Smiling softly Remus reached out to stroke a hand down the baby's downy cheek. She opened one eye before closing it again. “Yes,” he murmured. “Merlin help me, yes.”
“So we can…we can keep her?” Sirius checked needing to be sure.
“Promise me you checked she has no other family.”
“Only child of older parents,” he murmured. “Minnie checked for me. Her parents were in their early forties, one living grandparent residing in Peacocks nursing home, and a great aunt in Westwood Lodge. Uncle on her mother's side is dead, one cousin. For whatever reason the test didn't give a name for either of them. She's all alone.”
“Didn't give a name?” Remus demanded, “Has it crossed your mind they're magical?”
“I ah...well honestly, yes," Sirius admitted, "but without a name, we’ve nothing to go on. Her mother's maiden name was blank too.”
“For fucks sake,” Remus muttered, “So magical relatives who what? I've never bloody seen that before!”
“Disowned I imagine,” Sirius mused, “And therefore not an issue.”
“And how are we explaining it?”
Sirius stilled, “I ah… don't actually know. Do we have to right now? We tell the people who need to know the truth.”
Remus let out a sigh, “And when we need an explanation as to why we’re pulling back from the Order?”
“I have French cousins.” Sirius declared after several beats. “One of them was ah.. indiscreet.”
“What cousin?”
“Celene,” he replied with certainty.
“And she'll confirm it?
“Of course, she won't,” Sirius scoffed, “it would ruin her reputation which was the whole reason she gave her up in the first place.”
“Merlin,” Remus groaned.
“We'll complete the adoption ritual and then she’ll be ours and it won't matter either way.”
“Right,” he muttered, “And Moody?”
“Ah fuck. We might need to tell him the truth. Man can spot a lie a mile off.”
Remus snorted, “Quite, are we holding off on the ritual until you've spoken to him?”
“Absolutely not!" Sirius retorted vehemently, "Once it's done no one can make us give her up.”
“Fine,” Remus muttered, “Although Pads…ah what exactly do you know about babies?”
“Nothing,” he replied cheerfully, “But we’ll figure it out. We might need to borrow Lolly from James for a bit until we're sure we won't break her but we’ll be fine!”
Remus looked distinctly unconvinced. “Right,” he muttered, reaching for her, “are we keeping her name?”
“I thought we might,” Sirius admitted, handing her over reluctantly.
“But?”
“Well… it's just, I know my family's not what we want to emulate but I've always liked star names.”
“So we give her it as a middle name,” “Remus shrugged looking down at the baby with something close to awe as she gave the sweetest yawn he'd ever seen. “Oh,” he breathed.
“Her middle name is Jean,” Sirius whispered, his eyes also on the baby that had managed to completely enrapture him in a stupidly short space of time.
“But if we’re keeping her we get to change that, don't we?” Remus murmured equally as softly.
“We do, don't we,” Sirius mused, a small smile forming as the baby caught his finger in her tiny fist. “I’ve always liked Cassiopeia. Aunt Cassie was one of the only family members I actually liked.”
“Hermione Cassiopeia Black.”
“Lupin-Black,” Sirius corrected.
“What?”
“Lupin-Black,” he repeated firmly. “She's going to be yours too.”
“I can't…I can't saddle her with that Sirius! Everyone would know immediately! She couldn't hide it if she wanted to!” Remus replied looking panicked. “The daughter of a known werewolf…I…”
Letting out a mirthless bark of laughter, taking the infant from Remus to shush her when she startled, “I’m a bloody blood-traitor Black. I’m hardly a better option. And it's not like we're a secret love. The minute she says she's mine everyone would know she was yours too. You're being absolutely ridiculous! What were you planning? Raising her but making her pretend you don't exist? Don't be fucking absurd!”
“But what if I pass on…” he yelped when Sirius hit the back of his head.
“What did Lily tell you?” he growled.
“That's not how it works” Remus sighed.
“Exactly, so shut the fuck up and help me figure out what we need to keep a bloody baby alive so we can do this ritual.”
“I…I…right. I…maybe we need to heal your injuries first.” Remus stammered, not sure how he felt about having his arguments shut down, still illogically terrified he'd inflict his curse on the tiny girl his partner was staring at reverently.
“Oh,” Sirius glanced down at himself, taking in the torn robes and the blood and dirt. “Yeah, we should probably do something about those.”
“Right. Go put dittany on them, go for a shower and I’ll….I’m going to floo Lils. She’ll know what to do.”
“Good call,” Sirius nodded decisively, glad to have a plan in place as he gently handed over the baby and moved to do as he was told.
Sitting in the silence he left behind Remus looked down at the baby that was staring back at him. “Hi,” he whispered, feeling slightly ridiculous. “I ah…I have no idea what I’m doing. And I'm more than a little bit scared.” She blinked back seriously, making the corners of his mouth twitch up into a smile before it fell. “I’m really sorry about your Mummy and Daddy. But we’ll love you. I promise and we’ll give you everything you could ever want. And…now you're going back to sleep.” he sighed. “Let's go and see if Aunty Lily knows what to do shall we?”
“Remus!” James’ voice sounded above his head, “Is everything alright? Is Sirius?”
“He's fine," Remus rushed to reassure him, knowing they were all on edge these days. "well..minor cuts and bruises but he’ll live. We ah…we need a bit of a hand though if Lils is free?”
James frowned, “Moony… what's going on?” they both jumped when the baby in his arms gave a startled cry. “Remus?”
“Ah fuck.” he swore, “Just…come through. Bring your wife.” Cutting off the call abruptly, he stood, trying not to panic when she continued to cry. “Please don't.” he begged, cuddling her close to his chest and bouncing her slightly, “I don't know what I'm doing remember? Please don't cry.”
“Sweet Merlin,” James breathed, stepping through, looking at him as if he’d never seen him before. “Is that…is that a baby?”
“A baby?” Lily demanded from behind him, “Where on Earth did you get a baby?”
“I’ll explain later, just tell me how to make it stop!” he begged as the tiny girl continued to cry.
“Give them here,” Lily held out her arms expectantly, much to Remus’ relief. “Call Lolly, she should be able to get supplies short term, Merlin knows she's been pushing us to have one.”
“Right,” James muttered calling for the elf. Her eyes lit up at the sight of the girl Lily was attempting to soothe before she disappeared, returning with all manner of paraphernalia.
“The little miss bes needing changing,” she instructed, “And then feds.”
“I don't know how to do that,” Remus whined.
“Lolly will show you,” the elf bossed, “Master Remus will bes paying attention.”
“Yes Lolly.” he agreed quickly, watching as the elf snapped her fingers and a folded blanket appeared at their feet.
“Put the little miss down there.”
Lily moved to comply quickly, well enough aware to be wary of the elf's temper. “Now, yous bes watching closely.” she waited to ensure that they were all watching before she moved the dress out of the way, demonstrating the correct cleaning charms and how to put on a cloth nappy. “Now the little miss bes hungry. Lolly will bring a bottle and once she bes being asleep, Lolly will show you what to do.”
“Thank you, Lolly,” Remus replied fervently, eyeing the still-screaming girl with something close to fear. All of them breathed out a sigh of relief when, with the bottle finally in her mouth she was quiet.
“You're going to explain now, right?” James demanded as Sirius bounded back into the room, looking about in surprise.
“Prongs! Lils! I see you’ve met our little star.”
“Your little star?” Lily's eyebrows rose sharply.
“Didn't Moons say? We’re keeping her.” he beamed back at her, moving to sit next to Remus, his finger finding its way back into Hermione's tiny fist.
Lily's eyes slid to James’ a look of utter disbelief on her face. “No, I'm going to need you to repeat that.”
“Meet Hermione Cassiopeia Lupin-Black,” he informed them proudly, pouting when Lolly demanded he let her go so she could demonstrate how to burp her.
“Pads.” James began slowly, “Pads where did you get her?”
“Ah,” he frowned, his eyes darting to Lily. “Do you know what we were called to tonight?”
“No.”
“Fuck,” Sirius hissed “Right I ah… they've managed to gain access to the book of names or worked out how to track accidental magic, we’re not sure.”
Both James and Lily paled, “No.”
“Yes,” he replied gently an apologetic expression on his face, “We weren't quick enough to help her parents or the two families before her but…I couldn't put her into the muggle system! I won't!”
“So you're keeping her,” James sighed with a look of resignation, seeing the stubborn expression on Sirius' face. Silently, he wrapped an arm around his wife, “Of course you are.”
“Lolly will stay to help,” Lolly nodded decisively into the silence, “Teach Master Sirius and Master Remus what to do.”
“Thank you, Lolly,” Sirius smiled gratefully. “It's probably best we’re supervised for a bit.”
“What about her family?” Lily interrupted.
“Names of any living family are missing. We figured she's linked to a magical family but without a name, there's nothing we can do. Maybe her mother was a disowned squib?”
“Jesus Christ.” she muttered, “And you won't get in trouble. Just…taking a baby?”
“Minnie knows.” Sirius shrugged as if that made all the difference, “She was the one who checked her name and her family tree. We should technically hand her over to the muggle police and let them deal with it but… she's so small. And helpless and I just…I couldn't! Why shouldn't she be part of our world from the beginning, she's a witch! And those homes are meant to be horrible. Lils…look at her.”
Lily sighed, her eyes landing on the now sleeping girl. “Fine.” she sighed, knowing her own childhood would have been infinitely easier if her parents hadn't been so confused when she was younger. “What story are we going with?”
“The truth for those we’re close enough to tell. Indiscreet French cousin for everyone else.”
“Why would an indiscreet French cousin give a baby to you?” James demanded incredulously.
“Well, I ah…hadn't quite thought that through,” he admitted sheepishly. “Ah… Marius always liked me and wanted to me find a decent family? Merlin knows he could hardly reach out to the rest of them.”
“Fair point,” James agreed. “I mean it's…flimsy but it’ll do I suppose. When are you doing the ritual?”
“As soon as possible? Want to be godparents?”
“Yes!” James grinned “Of course I bloody do! I’ll be the best godfather there is!”
Lily rolled her eyes, “I’m not reining him in,” she warned. “You'll have to deal with the consequences of that decision all on your own. But one of us should at least be sensible, poor girl.”
“So you’ll do it?” Sirius checked.
“Of course, we will,” she sighed, despite the fond look on her face, “Merlin knows how she’ll end up if it's left to you three.”
“Oi!” Remus objected.
“Christmas prank of '76.” Lily intoned making him flush.
Sirius grinned, “One of our best ones! Now, what about Peter, think we can entice him away from his mother for a night to meet his new niece?”
“You can try,” Lily murmured, a flash of worry crossing her face, “I think she's pretty ill though, he's turned down all our invites. Maybe he’ll be at the next meeting and you'll catch him?”
“Hopefully,” Sirius murmured, stealing the baby back from Remus.
“She's going to be the most spoiled little girl in the entirety of Britain.” Lily groaned, watching them. Both Remus and Sirius just smiled, wondering how long it would take Lily to appear with all manner of muggle children's things.
“Black! What in the name of Helga's yellow bloomers is that?” Alastor stared at him in horror.
“Auror Moody!” he beamed, “Meet my daughter Hermione!”
“Your daughter!” the Auror repeated disbelievingly.
“Isn't she adorable?” Sirius cooed, ignoring the darkening look on his boss’ face.
“Explain!” Alastor barked, startling Hermione.
“Oh no, don't cry little star,” Sirius begged, moving the baby onto his shoulder as Lolly had shown them. “Uncle Alastor was just a bit surprised. That's it, no crying on Daddy. It makes him sad.”
The Order stared at him in stunned silence. “Daddy?” Marlene McKinnon demanded. “Daddy?”
Sirius smiled back at his friend proudly, manoeuvring the baby back into his arms so he could tilt her up, “Meet Hermione Cassiopeia Lupin-Black,” he proclaimed.
“Sweet mother of Merlin.” Frank muttered, “Seriously? She's yours?”
“Of course she is! Just look at her, she's already working on those Black curls.”
“Hallway, Black,” Alastor barked, waiting until he shut the door. “Explain.”
Sirius lost his playful demeanour immediately, “She was the sole survivor of the raids last night,” he admitted. “Bella targeted her.”
Alastor drew in a sharp breath. “And you kept her?”
“What else was I supposed to do!”
“Follow proper protocol!”
“And have her lost in the system! Moody look at her! She's tiny and defenceless and I can't bloody explain it but it felt right. And I just fucking couldn't. So…do whatever you need to do. Sack me. I don't care. She's mine. And I'm not giving her to bloody anyone.”
"How did no one notice?" Alastor demanded, changing tactics.
"I sent them on with Bella," he admitted, "Said I'd take care of her and waiting on muggle liaison."
Alastor eyed him with a blank face that made him want to fidget before he seemed to come to a decision. “I should bloody fire you,” he muttered, his eyes drifting back to the baby. “I should. But i won't. You're really bloody lucky we’ve got Lestrange in a cell and I'm feeling generous, Black. Don't make me regret it.”
“Thank you.” Sirius breathed.
“Don't thank me yet.” he growled, “You've just had a baby in the middle of a war lad. If you think staying safe was hard before, now you've that wee lassie to consider.”
Sirius paled abruptly. “Fuck.” he hissed. “I didn't think…how do I…”
Moody smirked, “Constant vigilance.”
They were interrupted as Dumbledore walked through the door, “Is there everything alright?”
“Just finalising some work issues, Albus.” Alastor replied, “And meeting the newest Black.”
Behind Albus, Severus Snape both tensed and sneered, realising who else was there. Catching the movement, Sirius’ head shot up and his expression turned flinty.
“Snape,” he hissed.
“Is here on my invitation,” Albus warned watching with interest as Alastor caught Sirius’ arm.
“The thing about being a parent,” he hissed lowly, “Is remembering you need to be a better person than you were before. For them. Do you want that wee lass to grow up with the same prejudices you had? Have her grow up seeing you act like an irrational arse based on nothing more than school Houses? Make her scared to tell you if she happens to be sorted into Slytherin? Most Blacks are lad.”
Sirius froze, turning that over inside his head before he glanced down at his daughter, tiny and vulnerable, trustingly asleep in his arms. “No,” he breathed out.
“No. Then you're going to listen before you react, am I clear?”
“Yes boss,” he muttered, fighting the urge to argue.
“Good lad. Why is he here, Albus?”
“Severus approached me some time ago when it became clear they were planning to target children. He was the reason we knew what families the attacks were aimed at last night. I am only sorry we weren't quick enough to save any.”
“One survived,” Severus hissed. “You promised you'd help me find her!”
Sirius stiffened, feeling Moody's eyes on him. “Why are you looking for them?” Alastor asked deceptively lightly.
Running an agitated hand through his hair, Severus looked more than a little exhausted. “My father had a sister. I…formally disowned them all once I was of age but they mentioned my aunt when discussing the mugglborn families, thinking it was hilarious I had more muggle relatives. I didn't know she had had a child. She and my father were not close, I never saw her growing up, but…her daughter is only four weeks old and she's missing! If they have her….”
“They don't,” Sirius interrupted abruptly before his brain caught up with his mouth.
“They don't,” Severus repeated stupidly.
“No.”
“How do you know?” he growled.
“Lad.” Moody's tone was a warning as he glared at Sirius. “The truth.”
“But what if….”
“You think that Albus hasn't checked him thoroughly?”
Sirius’ eyes darted to Dumbledore's.” Of course I have.” Albus agreed, watching Sirius' face with interest..
Nodding slowly, Sirius wondered if he could do this. Admit what he’d done to Severus Snape of all people. Especially when what he really wanted to do was hex the man. He glanced down at the baby, missing the realisation on Severus’ face.
“No!” he hissed.
“I’ll give you the same warning I gave Black, lad,” Moody growled when he started to move forward. “You don't want to be passing on your prejudices to the next generation.”
Severus froze, “Why do you have my cousin?” he bit out.
“Because she had no family, their names, your name, was missing. And she's bloody four weeks old!”
“Give her here then. I’ll…sort something.”
“No.” Sirius growled, “I’ve already sorted something.”
“She's my cousin!” Severus hissed.
“And what are you going to tell them when you appear with a baby? What happens when they put two and two together?” Severus paled, the dark circles under his eyes seeming to deepen. “Exactly.”
“What are you going to do with her?” he asked, sounding like the civility pained him.
“Does it matter?”
“Yes!” he howled. “Of course it does! My aunt and her husband are dead! She has no other family!”
“She does now.” Sirius muttered, cradling the girl close, “Remus and I adopted her. Full Black blood adoption.”
Albus caught Severus’ arm as he swayed on his feet, genuine horror on his face. “So the question is, can the two of you put your own issues aside for the wee lass?” Alastor asked, eyeing them both.
“What?” Sirius turned to his mentor looking startled.
“It doesn't do the lass any harm to have more family, Black, now does it?”
“You cannot be serious!”
Moody arched a brow, “Why not? The lad's been vetted by Albus. I’ll be vetting him next. We’re at war, we're on the same side, and she’ll need all the protection she can get.”
Sirius stared back at him in horrified disbelief, “But…”
“Fine.” Severus cut in. “I want to ensure she's alright.”
“Wonderful,” Albus twinkled at them. “Then both of you can remain behind to discuss the particulars. Presumably with Mr Lupin. Now, shall we?”
He gestured them into the room, wandering in in stunned distraction, Sirius didn't even register the swelling of noise that accompanied Snape's appearance, nor did he notice the worried looks Remus and James were shooting at him. Sitting down between Lily and Remus mechanically, he wondered if he was adult enough for this, Moody's words swimming inside his head.
He was so lost inside his own head that he jumped when he felt a hand clap down his shoulder, turning he met Moody's amused eyes, “You're immature, irreverent and a bit of an arse Black.” Alastor glanced down at the baby, “This is your chance to prove you're more than that.”