familial territory
bold and italicized is remus
bold is regulus
Regulus would be lying if he said he wasn’t nervous.
Him and James had been dating for a solid few months. Though their relationship was still new, he knew that James loved him. Truthfully, that was all he could ask of the other man. He’d spent his whole life in the shadow of others; in the shadow of Sirius, in the shadow of his parents, in the shadow of everyone. But James; kind, caring, horrendously selfless James, had picked him. And even after he had found out who Regulus really was, he still chose him.
Out of all the people, James picked Regulus.
So why was he expecting the worst outcome for this?
He stood outside of James’ flat, hesitant hand raised to knock on the door. He had a key, but he was always too nervous to use it. Didn’t want to invade James’ privacy (even though he had no problem with James invading his).
All James’ text had said was “hey! i have something important i want to ask you, are you able to talk today sometime?” So, it’s not like James said he was going to break his heart or anything. Though, he couldn’t help that that’s where his mind went to. He’d gone through every scenario; James dumping him for a multitude of different reasons, James telling him that he wanted to take a break, James telling him he had found someone else and was running away to the rural United States to live an off-the-grid lifestyle…yeah, so maybe he was overthinking this. But when you’re Regulus Black; the spare, the forgotten one, yet another family disappointment, can you really blame him?
Regulus realized he had been standing in front of James’ apartment for longer than he should of. He knocked on the door. James answered a few moments later, hair tousled like he had just rolled out of bed…and judging by the lack of pajama bottoms, Regulus figured he probably had.
“Hi,” James said, smiling. He wasn’t wearing his glasses; and he’d clearly just thrown something on before answering the door. It was an old Hogwarts hoodie, the word GRYFFINDOR plastered across his chest in big yellow letters, and a lion underneath it. Regulus smiled; albeit, a small smile, before greeting James in return.
The two sat on the couch together, a mug of coffee in James’ hand, and tea in Regulus’. A slightly unnerving silence settled between the two. Regulus anxiously drummed his fingers against the side of his mug, nervously taking sips from it as he watched James fiddle with his hoodie.
“So,” Regulus started. “What did you want to talk about?”
James perked up at that, smiling warmly at his boyfriend. “Oh! Right. I’d forgotten,” He said, cheeks flushing. Regulus laughed quietly.
“So, um. I know we haven’t been dating for that long, and I don’t want to scare you by…I dunno, moving too fast? But I was wondering if, uh,” James trailed off at the end, which made Regulus’ mind race. Wondering what? If Regulus wanted to break up? Get married? Move in together? What the hell?
James took a deep breath before looking up at Regulus. “I was wondering if you wanted to meet my parents. They’ve heard a lot about you, both from me and Sirius, and I think you’d like them a lot. And I know they’d like you.”
Oh. Oh no.
Regulus felt the planet’s axis halt for a moment; the rotational pull stopping, sending his mind and senses careening off the deep end. His hands started to shake, only slightly, causing the tea in his mug to slosh around. James wanted him to meet Euphemia and Fleamont Potter. His parents. The people who him, Sirius, and Remus had spoken so highly of, for so long.
The people James loved more than anything in the world. Somehow this was more dramatic than a break up.
Yeah, he could definitely handle it. Definitely.
“Oh,” Regulus said. “That’s…that’s it?”
James looked at Regulus, confusion in his eyes. “What else were you expecting?”
The younger man blinked. “The way you texted me made it seem like you wanted to…” He trailed off, shifting uncomfortably on the couch. “I dunno. Break up, or something.”
James’ shoulders relaxed, and he set his mug of coffee on the table. “Oh, darling,” James said, reaching out to rest his hand on Regulus’ leg. “I’m sorry I made you worry. That wasn’t my intention at all. I definitely don’t want to break up. At all, hopefully.”
Regulus let out a dry laugh and smiled at his boyfriend. “Are…are you sure you want me to meet them?” He asked hesitantly. “I mean, I’m honored you’d like me to meet them, and I will, but I’m…I don’t know. Don’t you worry about something going wrong?”
“No. Honestly, I don’t worry. You’ve had a really fucking hard life. But that doesn’t define who you are, or dictate your life. The actions of your mother and father don’t define you. You’re not a bad person. You’ve just had bad things happen to you.” James said, nonchalantly. It caught Reg off guard, sometimes he forgets that James is literally a therapist for his career.
Regulus breathed heavily. “As long as you’re certain I won’t…I dunno, make them hate you or something.”
“You won’t. My mum has already started knitting you a scarf for Christmas.” James said, smiling brightly.
“Already?” Regulus asked, slightly taken aback.
James nodded. “Yeah. Already. She knows how much Sirius and I care about you, so she cares about you too. And she’s a big gift giver. And a hugger. But it’s okay if you don’t accept a hug.” He said, rambling for a few moments about his mother.
Regulus smiled warmly as he listened, his head resting against the back of the couch, mug of tea grasped between his hands. He’d come in prepared for the worst. But he knew he’d be leaving on cloud nine.
In many ways, Regulus preferred not having many friends. It was less maintenance; less relationships he had to put all the effort into working on, and engaging in. But, a tragic side effect of reconciliation with Sirius and dating James was that now, he had a lot of friends. He would call them acquaintances, but Sirius would simply call them “future best friends.”
It was almost James’ birthday, so Sirius had begun his month-long James-stravaganza, a name he had come up with himself, and was absurdly proud of. They were all over at Remus and Sirius’ flat to celebrate, even though James’ birthday wasn’t for another week. There were red and gold streamers decorating the walls, early 2000s music echoing through the apartment, sure to get Sirius and Remus a noise complaint. Currently, he was sandwiched in between Sirius and James, who were pulled into a conversation with Gideon and Fabian regarding…rugby, maybe? He wasn’t really paying attention; both James and Sirius were loud, which he didn’t mind, but it was starting to drone in his ears and make his head rattle.
He didn’t like parties. But it was nearly James’ birthday, so Reg chose to suffer through it, much to his head’s dismay. The combination of the hard seltzers he’d been nursing, the loud noise, and the admittedly boring conversation he was stuck between, was starting to grate his nerves far more than he expected. Regulus let his leg bounce up and down rapidly, hoping it would calm the ever-growing anxiousness building in his chest. Across the room, he saw Remus pull out his phone.
[19:21] you okay?
[19:21] overwhelmed
everything is loud
its making my head hurt
[19:22] follow me
Remus stood up from in between Lily and Marlene, using his cane to steady himself, before sending Reg a pointed look.
“Where are you going?” James asked, words slurred, as Regulus started to stand up up.
Regulus gave him a smile. “Just talking with Remus. I’ll be back in a second.” He said, squeezing James’ thigh before following Remus down the hallway in their apartment.
They arrived at Remus and Sirius’ bedroom, which Regulus felt oddly uncomfortable in. Something about being in his brother’s personal space after not seeing him for so long made him want to book it out into the living room as fast as possible. He knew that Remus knew he wasn’t having the best time. So he stayed, sitting down on the floor beside the bed, leaning his back against the mattress. There was a dull pounding from some Pitbull song Regulus didn’t recognize; even down the hall with a closed door, the music was loud enough for it to pound in his head, his mind throbbing to the beat. He hated it.
“You alright?” Remus asked, sitting down in front of Regulus. He heard Remus’ cane rattle softly against the rug- Remus’ joints had been getting worse recently, so Sirius and Pandora had designed him a custom cane as a gift to help alleviate some of the pain he was in. Sirius had taken on the brunt of their finances, since Remus had to drastically cut his hours at work, but with the inheritance he received from their uncle when he passed…well, they were fine.
Sometimes, when Remus felt like Sirius was babying him too much, he would come see Regulus. And Regulus appreciated having Remus around, even if Sirius would make “you already stole my best friend, you can’t have my boyfriend too!” jokes every time Regulus would send Remus home.
Regulus shrugged at Remus’ question. “Overwhelmed,” He said simply.
Remus nodded and stretched his legs so they were on either side of Regulus. “Do you want to talk about it?” Remus asked. “You don’t have to. But sometimes when I’m overwhelmed, talking makes it easier.”
He worried his bottom lip in between his teeth, letting his head rest against the mattress. “I dunno,” Regulus mumbled, staring at the ceiling. “I don’t…I haven’t had many friends in my life. And it feels like after James and I started dating, and after Sirius and I started to reconcile, I was just…bombarded with people who liked me. Who cared about me. It’s strange,” Regulus paused.
The taller man didn’t press further, which Regulus appreciated.
“Even in school, it was just 5 of us in a group. Me, Pandora, Dorcas, Evan, and…and Barty,” Regulus said. “I hadn’t spoken to Evan in years, since at least a few months before I left my parent’s house. I felt awful, but then he reached out to me, wanted to talk and become friends again. And I want that, but it’s just…” He trailed off.
“Does it have something to do with Barty?” Remus asked.
Reg blinked a few times before looking back at Remus. Somehow, per usual, he’d hit the nail straight on the head. “Yeah. I think I’m scared he’s only doing this because Barty wants to talk to me again.”
Remus nodded. “Barty’s your ex, right?” He asked. Regulus nodded in response, running his fingers through his curls.
“He was awful. And, yeah, there’s always a possibility that he’s changed, but like…what if he hasn’t? What if he’s still the…the shitty, transphobic asshole that he was when we broke up? I don’t want to be around that. Am I wrong for that?” Regulus asked. His voice cracked, his eyes suddenly stinging with tears.
Therapy was helping a lot, but truthfully, he did not appreciate how easy it was to cry in front of people now.
Remus reached out, his hand hovering over Regulus’. Regulus gave him the okay, and Remus gently held his hand in his larger one, squeezing it softly. “You don’t owe Barty anything, alright? Even if he’s changed. You can’t control what he does, but you can control how you react. If Barty is still the same transphobic shithead he was last time you spoke to him, don’t engage with it. But if he’s changed, and he can prove that he’s really, truly changed, then make your decision. But you shouldn’t feel obligated to be friends with him again.”
Regulus nodded, sighing again.
“Something else is up,” Remus noted. “Do you wanna talk about it?”
Remus was correct. Meeting James’ parents had nearly slipped his mind in all of the overwhelming stress of speaking to Evan again.
The date was James’ birthday. He always spent his birthday with his mum and dad, so did Sirius. The night afterwards was reserved for friends, but day of? That was for Effie and Monty to dote on them. In less than a week, Regulus would be meeting James’ parents for the first time. And truthfully, he was terrified.
“I…how did it go when you met Euphemia and Fleamont for the first time?” Regulus asked.
Remus furrowed his brow, before realization crossed his features. “Ah, James asked you to meet his parents.”
Regulus nodded.
“Well,” Remus started. “Effie and Monty are…genuinely the kindest people I’ve ever met in my life. My parents are divorced, your parents are shit, we both don’t really know what it’s like to see two older people, like parental figures…really in love, I guess. It’s definitely weird at first, but you get used to it.” Remus said. “Monty loves books, Effie loves cooking. They both took an early retirement when they had James, since they had him pretty late. Effie will make you…an ungodly amount of food. I swear, I stayed there for the holidays one year and gained 15 pounds in two weeks. Best two weeks of my life.”
Regulus laughed at that, which made Remus laugh along with him. “Sirius…can be less than helpful about shit like this, we’re both aware of that fact. But truthfully, the only way Effie and Monty could dislike you is if you, like, shot and killed James in front of them. And even then, they’d probably find it within themselves to forgive you.”
“I guess I just worry about making a poor first impression on them,” Regulus said quietly. “Like, I’ve been raised to be so proper my whole fucking life, told that I’m only useful if I’m doing something for other people, it…it sucks that I’m struggling so hard to feel like I deserve their affection. It’s not fair that I’ve been made to feel like I’m worthy of love from…well, anyone.”
Remus nodded, squeezing Regulus’ hand again. Regulus hadn’t realized he was crying even harder until that point. “I know. It’s not fair at all. But you absolutely deserve that kind of love, okay? You’ve spent almost your whole life being treated like shit by every single person around you, it’s about damn time someone took care of you the way you deserve- which is gently, and deeply, and passionately. James gives that to you. Effie and Monty will give that to you. Sirius gives that to you. Even I do too.”
Regulus sniffled, using the sleeve of his sweater to wipe his cheeks. “You reckon I could do it?” Regulus asked. “You think I can impress them?”
“I know you can do it,” Remus said, squeezing Regulus’ hand once again. “They’re going to love you. I know it, Reggie.”
They sat in silence for a few minutes before Regulus stood up, sighing softly. “Thank you, Remus. Truly, thank you. If Sirius hadn’t gotten you first, I’d be ready to pounce.” Regulus joked, making Remus laugh loudly.
“Don’t let Sirius find out you said that,” Remus said, before they walked back into the living room.
“I’m nervous,” Regulus admitted, staring at James. They’d taken James’ car to his parent’s house, per Regulus’ request. He didn’t want to pull into Euphemia and Fleamont’s driveway with their son on a motorcycle; James tried to reassure him that they wouldn’t care in the slightest, but he was still horrendously anxious about impressing them.
Currently, they sat outside his parent’s house, Regulus’ hand gripping James’ tightly. James’ thumb ran across his knuckles, back and forth, a gentle reminder that he was real and he was sitting there, and nothing bad would happen.
Oh, how Regulus adored this boy.
“They’re going to love you, sweetheart,” James reassured him. “They have no reason not to.”
Regulus chuckled. “But what if I give them a reason not to? Like, what if I choke on my food and throw up everywhere?”
James let out a laugh at that. “Darling, my mum would be far more concerned about you being okay physically than she would about the food, or her table. She’d probably make me clean it up while she babied you all night.”
“Oh god, I don’t want that to happen,” Regulus lamented, burying his head in his free hand. He’d spent most of the day at that point fussing over his appearance- checking, double checking, and triple checking that he didn’t look absolutely atrocious before James picked him up. Pandora had come over the night before to help him pick out an outfit- they’d decided on a dark brown sweater, his green trousers, and an old vintage leather jacket on top of it. Additionally, Pandora had slid a multitude of silver rings onto his fingers, and fastened some delicate silver necklaces around his neck.
He felt like he looked alright. From the way James stumbled over his words and turned bright red when he’d first seen him, it seemed like James thought so too.
“My love, it will be fine. They’re going to love you. I promise.” James reassured him, for the millionth time. “They already know they like you. Now, it’s properly putting a face to the name.”
Regulus sighed, squeezing James’ hand again. “Okay. Fuck, let’s head in.” He said.
Soon enough, they were at the Potter’s front door. James squeezed his hand gently, sending him a small smile before ringing the doorbell. A few moments passed before Regulus heard the doorknob turn, and he was then greeted by the face of an incredibly kind looking older man.
The first thing he noticed is how similar James and Fleamont looked. They wore the same circular glasses, their eyes held the same gentle kindness, their noses sloped the same.
The second thing he noticed is how similar James and Fleamont acted. He knew damn well they’d just seen each other a few days prior, but the hug Fleamont had pulled James into looked like one of a father that had not seen his child in fifteen years.
He felt a small tug on his heart.
“Mērā muḍā, it’s lovely to see you,” Fleamont greeted, releasing James from the tight embrace they’d been engulfed in. He turned his attention onto Regulus. “Ah, and you must be Regulus. It’s lovely to meet you.” Fleamont stuck his hand out for Regulus to shake. He said a silent thank you that Fleamont did not immediately crush him in a hug- he might have cried if that happened, and truthfully, he couldn’t tell you if they would be happy tears or not.
Regulus grasped Fleamont’s hand, shaking it respectfully. “It’s lovely to meet you too, sir.” Regulus responded, smiling politely.
“Ah, enough with the sir, just call me Monty,” Fleamont said, grinning as he dropped Regulus’ hand. “Sirius did the same when he first came to us. Monty is just fine. Effie might have a conniption if I don’t bring you in to meet her now. Come in, boys,” Fleamont said, guiding the two inside the house.
Potter Manor was lovely, truly. It reminded him a lot of Andromeda’s house in the way it was decorated- warm colors, plants, lovely tapestries, candles that smelled of cinnamon and clove. It reminded him of James’ flat, which reminded him of…well, home.
Euphemia rounded the corner into the living room right as the three of them crossed through the threshold. She held the same kindness in her features that James did, the same warmth and love that James showed everyone around him. “Mērē pi’ārē muḍē!” She exclaimed, bringing James into her arms. Euphemia was a fair bit shorter than him and Fleamont, so James had to lean down a fair bit to hug her. “Tusīṁ sahī sī, uha bahuta sudara hai, James.” He heard Euphemia whisper in James’ ear as they pulled apart, and he saw James turn red.
“Mama, this is Regulus,” James said, extending his hand towards Regulus. Euphemia grinned, her smile warm and inviting, and quickly made her way over to him. She reached a hand out and grasped Regulus’ hand in hers, they were soft and lovely, they contrasted nicely against James and Fleamont’s rough hands from years of rugby. She gave his hand a squeeze and rested her other hand on top of them. “It’s lovely to meet you, pi’ārē,” She said, and Regulus smiled back at her, squeezing her hand in return. “It’s lovely to meet you too, Mrs. Potter.”
Euphemia let out a short laugh, turning her head to look at Fleamont. “He reminds me of Sirius, it’s no surprise to me that they’re brothers,” She said, which made James and Fleamont both laugh. “I promise, love, Effie is just fine.” Regulus flushed a deep red, a small smile on his lips. It was such a small thing, Effie calling him and Sirius brothers, but no matter how far into his transition he got, it never failed to fill his chest with the same lovely warmth.
Euphemia ushered the three men into the kitchen, guiding Regulus through a tour of each dish she had prepared- naan, paneer tikka, dal makhani, butter chicken with jasmine rice, and to finish the meal off, gajar ka halwa. It was a lot of food, but Remus had already prepared him for this fact, and the fact that she loved sending guests home with leftovers to ensure that they were well fed.
Once Effie was certain that her boys were sufficiently fed, they were ushered back into the living room, where Monty served them each a mug of Chai while they sat and talked. It started out as simple small talk, mostly getting to know Regulus since, while James had talked a lot about him, there was still more Effie and Monty wanted to know. He talked about his art career, doing commissions for people, and his future plans to start working at Betty’s Garden with Dorcas and Peter. He talked about his friends, the ones Effie and Monty hadn’t met yet, and they’d responded with lovely enthusiasm at the thought of meeting them eventually. And he talked about his motorcycle, which Monty was already fascinated by, and trying to convince Effie that yes, buying a side car for Regulus’ bike for him to ride him was an incredible idea , thank you very much.
By the end of the night, Regulus had a tote bag full of takeaway containers, filled to the brim with the remnants of the food the four of them hadn’t eaten. Standing at the doorway, he watched James be embraced by his mother, listening to her whisper things into James’ ear about getting home safely, and ensuring that he lets her know when Regulus gets home, too. He felt Monty put a hand on his shoulder, and Regulus looked up at him.
“While I know what happened with Sirius, you’re under no obligation to tell us what happened to you. But I want you to know that no matter what, our home is always open for you, Regulus,” Monty said, peering down at Regulus through his glasses. “The same way our home is open to anyone James cherishes, it is always open to you. Especially since my son cares about you more than anyone else.”
Regulus felt his throat start to burn, and swallowed hard, nodding his head. “Thank you, Monty.” He simply said, giving the older man a small smile. Monty simply nodded in response, giving him another smile, and squeezing his shoulder before moving away so Effie could come over to him.
“Is a hug alright, Śahida?” She asked.
Regulus smiled again. “Absolutely, Effie,” He said.
Effie embraced him, leaning up to give him a small kiss on his cheek. “It was lovely meeting you, Regulus. Make sure my son treats you well, alright? And if he doesn’t, I’ll pull out the embarrassing baby photos of him.” She said teasingly, quiet enough for only him to hear. Regulus laughed and hugged her back, reassuring her that he would come to her for absolutely anything.
The drive home was quiet, save for the soft music James was playing through the radio. James’ thumb softly ran across the rings on Regulus’ fingers, occasionally giving his hand a squeeze as he drove Regulus back home.
“It seems like my dad has taken a liking to you,” James said with a smile.
Regulus nodded, letting out a soft laugh under his breath. “I’m quite thankful for that. And I do like the idea of him in a sidecar on my bike.”
His boyfriend let out a loud laugh at that, grinning ear to ear. “The thought of my father riding around in your sidecar through the streets does sound very intriguing, even if my mother doesn’t fully approve.”
“Eh, we’ll do it in secret,” Regulus scoffed. “Not even you will know.”
“Oh yeah?” James inquired, still grinning. “I didn’t realize you were that sneaky.”
“I’m quite sneaky, love, I just haven’t had a reason to be in a few months,” Regulus remarked back.
The two fell into a comfortable silence for a few minutes, before James pulled into Regulus’ parking lot. The two carried their bags into the lift and into Regulus’ apartment, and James helped him pack his leftovers into his fridge.
“I’m very glad my parents love you,” James said, breaking the silence.
Regulus looked up at him from where he was standing at the kitchen island, pulling the last container out of the large tote. “Did you have any doubts about that?”
James shook his head. “No, but I know you did. And knowing that my parents love you will definitely help both of us sleep better tonight. You’ll sleep better knowing that my parents love you, and I’ll sleep better knowing that you’re not up all night worrying yourself half to death because they didn’t.”
Regulus snorted. “You know me too well, James,” He said, placing the last container in the fridge before shutting the door. He walked over to James and wrapped his arms around the man’s waist, pulling him close. He felt James wrap his arms around his shoulders, and a soft kiss on the top of his head.
“You mean everything to me, I hope you know that.” James said softly, running his fingers through Regulus’ curls. Regulus felt a blush creep onto his face before pulling away slightly, leaning up to press a kiss to James’ lips.
“You mean the world to me, James Potter. Thank you for being you.” He said in response.
James smiled and kissed him again.