Second Year - Elton John
Sirius Black
Sirius didn’t have that much of an eventful Christmas, he didn’t end up getting to go to James’s house, and had to stay to be with family. Which wasn’t at the top of his list, it wasn’t half as bad as last Christmas though.
He tried to be on his best behavior, which is hard to do when everything you happen to do is wrong.
“Hiya boys” Sirius says, his two friends James and Peter sitting in a booth.
“Sirius!” The two say in unison, “how was your break? You didn’t come to James’s”
“Black family dinner” Sirius shrugs, James shoots Sirius and questioning look, and Sirius just nods, and a wave of clarity washes over his face and his shoulders untense .
“We’ll sit down” Peter suggests, Sirius suts across from the two “ alright holiday Pete?” Sirius questions “yeah it was alright,”
“How was yours james?” Sirius directs his attention to his friend who’s not paying attention “James” Sirius repeats “right! Good- great, my dad got me a broom for quidditch “ James bolts back up into his usual cheery self.
His curly brown hair falling in front of his face, his glasses sit awkwardly on the bridge of his nose. “ think Remus is alright, not a word back from my letters” James gives the angle of his glasses, running a hand under his nose, itching away the awkward feeling.
“Me neither” Sirius shrugs, a wash of worry runs through Sirius’s body. He hadn’t thought much about Remus not responding. He just thought it was Remus being his usual unresponsive self, but what if he wasn’t alright.
“Sirius” He hears a cough from his right trying to get his attention. It's Regulus .
“Do you want these, I hate the things” he shakes a box of Bertie botts beans
“Hate the things” James mocks, regulus shoots his gaze at James “how could you hate those”
“Then you have them, Potter ,” he tosses the box to James and James’s smile widens from ear to ear, as he rips open the box of sugary treats. Regulus scrunches his face in disgust, flickering his eyes back to his brother.
“You look pale” he suggests bluntly, sirius looks at his pale hands, and wonders.
Am I always this pale?
“he does” James agrees, mouth full of sweets. “Gross, didn't your mother ever teach you some manners, Potter?” James doesn’t respond , just stuffs more candy in his mouth, excitement goes over his face every time he tastes a good flavor.
Sirius is becoming overwhelmed in this moment.
Sirius directs his eyes to his brother, who’s shooting a concerned stare. “I’m fine” he assures, he is fine.
Sirius seems extremely aware of his surroundings at this moment, hearing James’s chewing and feeling Regulus’s stare. The train seems to be moving extra fast, making him feel uneasy.
“Alright” regulus says, sounding unsure of his brother's words, “see you “ he adds, leaving their booth.
The train comes to a stop, which makes Sirius just as uneasy, he feels all the people trample in. It repeats in his head, like a heartbeat.
“Remus!” His two friends cheer. Sirius takes a moment to process his surroundings, and he looks up to Remus.
Who’s eyes droop tiredly, dark circles around his eyes, his clothes wrinkled and his right shoelace has come untied.
Jesus.
His uneasiness instantly fades away in a flash, his worry for his friend makes an appearance.
Remus drops his trunk on the floor, plopping his body next to Sirius “Remus, are you alright “ James asks.
“Hm?” He hums sleepily, Peter stands up and grabs Remus’s trunk and puts it away,
Remus doses off onto Sirius’s shoulder, which makes his stomach coil up in knots, but pushes down.The three boys give each other a concerned look.
Questions go over in Sirius’s head. What happened? Who hurt him? What hurt him?
He comes to the realization after running over in his head what coulve happened to him.
His mother. Sirius’s stomach flips
***
The four make it into the school, James carries Remus and his trunk, and Peter and Sirius help carry Remus, their other arm holding their own trunks.
They make their way to the infirmary, Madam Promfrey is fluffing pillows, but instantly drops the pillow when she sees Remus.
“What happened ?“ she rushes over, grabbing Remus from the two boys' arms.
“He got on the train and fell asleep and he’s just been sort of asleep ” Peter rambles.
Madam promfrey holds Remus up, who’s become more awake and seems to be hugging her.
He sounds like he’s mumbling “ don’t want to leave mom” over and again. His words sound choked, his choppy sentence leaves shivers down Sirius's spine .
“Alright help me with his legs” she orders, Sirius rushes over to madam pomfrey, she lays him on a hospital bed, Sirius lifts his legs up and places them on the bed.
“Is he going to be okay madam pomfrey?” James asks sheepishly.
“Yes dear, he’s just tired “ her lips curl into a frown. “You three should go, he won’t be awake for a while” she suggests, “I’m not leaving him “ Sirius protests.
“Mr black” she sighs, a crease forming between her brows. “He’s going to be asleep for a while, it’s best if you come back tomorrow. You all should get your own rest”
“Fine!” Sirius grabs his trunk and rushes , “we’ll come back in the morning sirius, “ James rushes after him. Remus and his suitcase still in hand. He can feel James and Peter exchanging looks behind him.
Sirius doesn't pay much attention to his friends, which he knows is insensitive. But to their dorm. His uneasiness makes an appearance again, but it feels worse this time.
The feeling of guilt and worry, forms a knot on Sirius’s stomach. A grim reality of his friend's life, Remus’s mother has always been a sensitive subject for him. Which Sirius understands, but not Remus’s way.
Remus has such love for his mother and her being in pain physically pains Remus, but it’s quite the opposite for Sirius. He doesn’t feel this connection with his mother, his pain isn’t hers and hers isn’t his.
Sirius drops his trunk, and the sight of his bed brings him relief. Sirius makes his way to his mattress and collapses onto his duvet, wrinkling the perfectly made bed. Sirius doesn’t fall asleep though, he stays awake. James and Peter ask if he wants to come down to supper and Sirius’s shakes his head.
When his two friends leave, Sirius sits up on his bed. Has Sirius been so negligent of his friend, he should’ve checked in on him . Even more after he didn’t respond.His mother could’ve died for all he knows. And Sirius was selfish enough to not think twice about him not writing back.
Sirius isn’t paying attention , until he feels a pain in his hand. He picked a hangnail, his thumb has turned into shade of red, and a small amount of blood drips from his finger.
“Ugh” he sighs, rolling over to his side to his bed stand, pulling a small first aid from his drawer. James had given him and the rest of the boys in the dorm at the beginning of the school year.
He rips open a small bandaid and wraps it around his finger. He knows he could easily use magic to fix this in a second but doesn’t has the energy to grab his wand. Or the energy to speak. He doesn’t have the energy to do anything except help Remus.
And there’s nothing he can do, which leaves Sirius stumped and there’s no outlet for his emotions. He starts picking at his other thumb, and can practically hear his mother call out this disgusting habit.
About an hour passes by and James and Peter have returned, Sirius has closed his bed curtains and waits to hear his friends snores. Time passes and Sirius hears James’s snoring echo through the room, and Sirius pokes his head out of the curtain, and sees Peter sleeping quietly.
Sirius decides to make his move, he grabs Remus’s present from his trunk and makes his way to the end of James’s bed, he grabs his invisibility cloak and pulls it over himself .
Sirius walks out of the dorm, he feels the knot on his stomach tighten as he gets closer and closer towards the infirmary.
Sirius enepters the infarct and sees Remus tossing and turning in his sleep, no one else in sight. His shoulders instantly untense at the sight of his friend, but the knot remains.
Sirius walks closer , his foot resting on a loose floor board, a creak from the wood surrounds his ears, and Remus bolts up.
“Who’s there?” he looks around in the dark, looking for someone.
Sirius pulls the cloak off “it’s me, it’s just me” Sirius holds his hands up in surrender. Remus’s body untense “what are you doing here?” He squints.
“I wanted to see if you were okay “ Sirius says softly, his hands drop to his side, he holds the cloak in his right hand along with his present, that’s hiding under the cloak and his other hand pulls on the loose thread on Sirius’s shirt.
“I’m fine, just knackered” Remus directs his gaze on something else in the room, Sirius steps forward “Remus, you can talk to me” Sirius suggests.
“I don’t want to talk to you” Remus snaps, Sirius feet instantly shuffle back at Remus’s tone.
Remus brings a hand to the bridge of his nose. “I’m not the talking kind and you know that” Remus croaks, his voice hardly comes out.
“I know” Sirius whispers, “I can’t remember the last time I slept” Remus implies. Sirius furrows his eyebrows “did something happen?” Sirius start “right, sorry”
“My mums given up” Remus laughs lightly, and the short laugh leaves shivers down Sirius’s spine.
“Given up” Remus takes a short breath and Sirius sits down on the bed next to him.
“She stopped her treatment, doesn’t even want to live anymore “ Remus’s voice cracks, and he covers his mouth from speaking anymore.
“I’m sorry-“ Sirius starts, his attention on Remus’s face, his body posture arches tiredly. Remus interrupts “I don’t want your pity Sirius “ remus states bluntly.
Sirius shuts his mouth, “I just want her to try” Remus directs his gaze to Sirius , his eyes are glossed over.
“Hey I got you something “ Sirius suggest his hand going down to his present for remus, if he doesn’t want his pity then he might just want the subject changes entirely.
“Sirius -“ .
“Nope “ Sirius inturupts. Sirius leans over to the edge of the bed and passes Remus the present. “Merry Christmas “ Sirius smiles.
Remus holds the present in his hands, and a slight smile crosses his lips. Which makes Sirius feel pleased, as he holds back a smile.
“Elton John ! ” Remus exclaims as he analyzes the album . “I didn’t get you anything, “ he responds.
“Pft it’s fine” Sirius waves his hand “you falling asleep on my shoulder made my year Remus Lupin “ Sirius laughs
Remus scrunches his face “ugh, forget that ever happened “ remus groans.
“Nope “ Sirius shakes his head “it’s locked in here” Sirius taps his head.
Sirius hadn’t even noticed, but the knot in his stomach has untied, and he’s the most at east he’s been all day.