Chapter 13
Agatha had half a mind to cancel dinner with Jen and Alice and reschedule when the food she was attempting to make wasn’t trying to ruin her plans.
She was only making salmon with asparagus and dauphinois potatoes. But Rio had already burnt the first two salmons, the double cream for the potatoes had been knocked on the floor and she didn’t have enough cheese. She’d convinced herself there was more than enough in the fridge and therefore hadn’t bought anymore at the farmers market.
As for the asparagus…actually…there was nothing wrong with the asparagus. But what good would that do her? She couldn’t serve up a plate of fucking vegetables.
“Relax,” Rio said from her perch atop the island. She was very much in the way.
After burning their fish Agatha had sent her off to prepare the table. Now she was finished she’d made it her sole purpose to annoy Agatha as her frustration grew.
Agatha huffed. “Why would I relax when dinners fucking ruined and Jen and Alice are going to be here in thirty minutes?”
“Because everything’s fine,” Rio smiled.
Agatha wanted to strangle her.
“I know you’re not slow, so why are you acting like it?”
Rio gasped, feigning offence. “Ouch! I didn’t realise you were this pissed off. I wouldn’t have come back into the kitchen otherwise.”
“What?” Agatha replied half listening as she tried to wrestle a wooden spoon free from where Rio was sitting on it. The other woman made no attempt to move to let her get it.
“When you get particularly moody you-”
A rare (for Rio) squeal left her mouth as Agatha picked her up by the waist and lifted her off the island. Once Rio was standing on her two legs, Agatha retrieved her wooden spoon.
She turned to the stove and started stirring what was left of the double cream until she realised the voice that followed her everywhere had suddenly gone quiet. Agatha spun round to face her, and Rio was just…blinking at her?
Why is she…ohhh. I touched her. Whoops.
“When I’m particularly moody I…” Agatha prompted, a smirk spread shamelessly across her lips.
“You…um…you…”
“Do you need a minute?” Agatha’s smirk never wavered, even after she turned back to the stove.
Rio cleared her throat, ignoring Agatha’s comment. “You insult me without actually insulting me. When you get really pissed off.”
“I don’t do that,” Agatha countered.
“Oh, yeah? Remember the time-”
The doorbell sounding cut Rio off.
“Shit!” Agatha checked the oven for the time. “They’re early.”
“Are they?” Rio asked, a teasing smile on her lips as she sauntered out of the room.
Agatha scrunched her face. What is wrong with Rio today?
She turned her attention back to the stove, heard Rio having a muffled conversation in the hallway, the front door shutting, and Rio’s reapproaching footsteps.
The other woman walked in with three large white takeaway bags.
Agatha stared at her. “You ordered food?”
Rio smiled as she breezed past her, setting the bags down on the kitchen island. She put on a low voice that sounded like Buzz Lightyear as she said, “I’m an FBI agent. I’m always prepared.”
Agatha raised an eyebrow and Rio deadpanned.
“When I burnt the first fish, I already knew this meal was gonna end up a disaster, so I ordered food.”
“And you didn’t think to tell me?”
Rio shook her head. “Why would I do that? I like when you get all grumpy.” She smiled, “It’s very entertaining.”
Agatha scowled at her.
“See.”
She started unpacking the bags, laying out the food on the island. Agatha turned off the stove, tipped the double cream into the sink and began loading the dishwasher.
Once she was finished, she put away the unused food into their rightful places. When she looked back at Rio, she was plating up the food she’d ordered in serving bowls and plates. They were having Mexican. There was an array of dishes: tacos, nachos and guacamole, chilli con carne, you name it.
It was only then Agatha realised how hungry she was. The food smelt so good. Much better than the fish Rio burnt that stank up the whole kitchen.
She watched Rio as she worked, watched the shift of her wine-red silk top that tied into a bow at the back and exposed her slender shoulders as she reached across the table, watched the way she moved around the island in her deep grey trousers that hugged her ass perfectly and she had to keep pulling up before she accidentally slipped on the excess material. They were clearly meant to be worn with heels. The flared bottoms kept running under her bare feet.
Oh, how Agatha loved watching Rio do stuff. It could literally be anything, and she’d watch with all the concentration of a person in deep meditation.
Her stomach growling snapped her out of it.
Rio laughed. “When was the last time you ate?”
“I haven’t really eaten today; I got distracted with the whole Jen and Alice coming for dinner thing.”
Rio laughed again. “You haven’t even had any of the fruit we bought earlier?”
Agatha shook her head.
“I’ll bring them out later. You have to have some of the cherries.”
“They’re good?”
Rio threw her head back to exaggerate her point. “So good. You’re good at that, picking the best fruit.”
Agatha’s breath hitched involuntarily. You’re good at that. Had anyone ever said that to her outside of a sexual context? No. She didn’t think so.
She knew she should come up with a cocky or teasing remark, knew she shouldn’t let Rio’s words spread a warm and protective layer over her heart. And then the last time Rio said something that caused the same effect flashed in her mind.
I guess time means nothing when I’m with you.
Did Rio know what effect her words were having on Agatha? Did she know or were they just offhanded remarks to her? Agatha wondered if she’d even noticed.
The snarky or teasing remark didn’t come, all that did was:
“I am?” Her voice wavered.
“Yeah,” Rio said through a laugh. “You-”
She cut herself off, looking up at Agatha for the first time in minutes. Rio’s face scrunched like she wanted to understand, that she registered Agatha’s tone and wanted to know what prompted it instead of the usual cockiness.
Rio stepped closer, her voice a gentle whisper. “Yeah. You’re great at it.” She nodded as if willing Agatha to understand. As if Rio understood that this was deeper than fruit.
“Thank you,” Agatha breathed.
Rio brushed her cheek with the back of her fingers. “Anytime.”
It was happening again. They were being sucked into one of those moments where it felt like it was just the two of them, as if there couldn’t be more to the world outside of Rio’s brown eyes. It physically pained Agatha how desperate she was to kiss her, but she couldn't bring herself to do it.
Agatha ruined most things, her relationship with Rio wouldn’t be one of them.
Their first kiss would be well thought out and approached carefully on Agatha’s part. The last time she had tried to kiss Rio it hadn’t ended well, the other woman had quite literally run away. She couldn’t handle Rio rejecting her again, so she had to be patient, read the situation right. She didn’t want to say it had to be perfect…but yeah…it had to be perfect.
The doorbell rang snapping the pair out of their little world and back to the real one with real other people.
“I’ll get it,” Agatha whispered, forcing herself to walk away from her wife.
She needed a fucking medal. Nobody was stronger than her at this point.
***
Dinner had gone well. Drinks were flowing, food had been demolished and Rio surprised herself when she realised, she was really enjoying her company. Her fake wife, her fake wife’s best friend and her ex-best friend. She felt herself wanting to get used to this, wanted to make this a custom. She hadn’t recalled a time when she actively wanted to be around a group of people. Where she’d felt known.
Apart from when she was on the job, Rio felt invisible. She wasn’t sure if it was because it was easier to protect herself that way or because she simply didn’t have anyone.
The party had moved to the living room, each woman with a full wine glass in hand.
“Wait…so you two did what?” Alice said, wiping tears from her eyes from how hard she’d been laughing.
“We locked our principal in a closet during senior prank.”
“How did you manage that?” Alice asked, she wiped at her eyes again.
“We said Agatha was stuck in the closet in the drama department,” Jen said.
There was a pause before the room erupted into more laughter due to the irony.
“Have you ever been in the closet?” Jen asked.
Agatha shook her head, laughter spilling uncontrollably out of her mouth. Rio loved when Agatha laughed like this, it was like she could see her. She was unguarded, wasn’t hiding behind a thick layer of whatever emotion she chose to shield herself with.
“When you get outed at eleven and it's splashed on the front page of every magazine the next day there’s no closet to climb into.”
The laughter in the room cut off instantly.
Rio’s eyes shifted to her wife above her on the couch from the floor. Agatha’s locked with hers and she knew her eyes were filled with unapologetic sympathy.
“Aggs,” Jen started. “I am so sorry, I completely forgot about that.”
“Me too,” Agatha chucked, the sound getting lost as she gulped down her wine.
Every woman in the room was staring at her.
Agatha huffed. “I didn’t mean to turn this into a doom fest. It’s fine, I’m fine, let’s just-”
“It’s not,” Rio cut in. “Never is, never was.”
That same look Agatha had given her when she’d told her she was good at picking fruit earlier was on her face again. That look that looked like she couldn’t believe the words coming out of Rio’s mouth, the look of someone who had never heard those words before.
Agatha let her lips twist into a small smile. She reached for Rio’s hand and held it, placing it in her lap.
“Rio, are you a witch or something?” Jen asked.
“What?” Alice said through a laugh, the tension in the room evaporating.
“I’m being serious. She must have some magical powers because I have never seen Agatha Harkness get so fucking sappy or actively go out of her way to touch another human being gently unless it’s Nicky.”
Rio looked up again to see Agatha scowling at her friend.
“What?” Jen shrugged.
Agatha narrowed her eyes, but she didn’t release Rio’s hand like she thought she would. Instead, she squeezed harder.
“Okay, so how did you two meet?” Agatha said, changing the subject as she waved her wine glass in between the women on the other couch.
“We met at work,” Alice said casually.
“Oh, cool,” Rio said. She tilted her head up to Agatha and saw the other woman with a slight furrow in her brow and sneaking suspicion in her eyes. Eventually, her facial expression smoothed out and Rio wanted to know what dots she was connecting.
“That’s nice.”
“Mhm,” Jen said. “What about you two?”
“Same,” Rio replied.
“Damn,” Jen shook her head. “We’re all married to our jobs then, huh?”
They all laughed. Rio more so because she was married to her job, although it felt like it less and less every day.
“Aliceee,” Agatha dragged out.
“Yussss,” Alice echoed her delivery.
“Share with the class a story about Rio in high school.”
Alice perked up at this. “It’d be an honour.”
“Do it and I’ll murder you,” Rio glared at her.
“I’ll take my chances. Plus, Jen would clock you before you had the chance,” Alice smiled.
“Not if Agatha got there first.” Rio heard Agatha scoff behind her.
“You wanna go, Harkness?” Jen said, setting down her glass, seemingly to stand.
“Okay, Kale. But I don’t want any tears, I know how much of a sore loser you are,” Agatha said, releasing Rio’s hand to get up.
“Sit down.”
“Sit your ass down,” Rio said at the same time Alice did.
The two women were staring at each other like they were in a bullfight again before they begrudgingly lowered themselves to the couch. Rio mirrored the slight shock on Alice’s face when their wives actually listened.
Alice cleared her throat. “Anyways, embarrassing Rio stories.”
“Hey! She said stories from high school not embarrassing ones.”
Alice waved her off. “Same thing.” She stroked her chin in thought for a moment before she said, “Oh! I know! There was this one time in gardening club when-”
“You two were in gardening club?” Jen cut in.
“Yes,” Alice replied, warning in her tone. “What’s the issue?”
“Nothing… it's just…isn’t that really nerd-”
“Stop digging yourself a grave, Kale,” Agatha tutted.
“I’m not…but isn’t it?”
Agatha shook her head like a disappointed mother. “Shush now, Jennifer. You are only making it worse.”
“But-”
She saw the daggers in Alice’s eyes and promptly shut up.
“Yeah, so this kid,” Alice continued. “What was his name, Ri?”
“Josh Davidson.”
Alice shuddered at the name. “Yeah, him. He stomped all over our azaleas, kicking, pulling, ripping them out of the ground. When he was done it looked like a crime scene.” She took another sip of wine before going on. “And I just stood there watching, which now that I look back at it was kinda pathetic. Anyways, Rio over here witnessed the end of Josh’s tantrum, so the damage had already been done.”
Rio started to laugh as she knew what was coming next.
“But she didn’t let him get away with it. I swear I’d never seen her move that fast, she stormed over to him and kneed him in the dick, once, twice, three times!”
Everyone was laughing now.
“He cried like a baby, falling to his knees in the azaleas he’d just slaughtered.”
Rio looked up to her fake wife on the couch, her own chest moving up and down with laughter.
“He had to go to the nurse's office and couldn’t get it up without being in excruciating pain for a month…so…obviously me and Alice as well as every girl in gardening club and then the rest of our year when they found out had their fun…enticing him,” Rio finished off the story.
“Oh, you’re evil,” Agatha said, the biggest smile on her face. “That’s my girl.”
Rio blushed like an idiot.
***
Agatha and Rio were back in the kitchen. Rio was preparing a fruit platter and Agatha was looking for another bottle of wine. She’d stopped counting how many the four had gone through.
“You, okay?” Rio asked her wife.
An easy smile spread across Agatha’s lips. “Yes. You?”
“Mhm. I think I should’ve drank less. What if I accidentally reveal we’re in fake marriage?”
Agatha feigned offence, gasping and holding her hand to her heart. “I knew you were only with me for the money!”
Rio laughed as Agatha smiled at her.
She wished she could stop harping on about her wife’s appearance. There was so much more to Agatha than just her looks, but god, wasn’t she just divine? If your wife looked like Agatha Harkness, you wouldn’t shut up about it either.
Agatha was wearing a black tailored short dress with a round neckline that cinched in her waist, and deep red lipstick. Rio was a sucker for Agatha in red lipstick.
“You’re going to get drool on the fruit.”
That snapped Rio back to the present. She blinked as she realised, she’d be staring into Agatha’s eyes the whole time.
“Was not,” Rio shot back like a child caught red-handed.
“At least you thought to lie about it, makes you seem less desperate that way,” Agatha teased.
Rio wanted to smack her.
Agatha brushed her hand against the small of Rio’s back as she passed to get to the drawer with the corkscrew and Rio’s entire body buzzed.
And then so did her phone on the kitchen island in front of her, and Agatha’s in her dress pocket.
That meant one thing.
“We got a mission,” Agatha said, reading the phone in her hand.
Now Rio really wished she had drank less.