Casanova of Gryffindor Tower

What they hadn’t thought of when they had come up with the way to prank their best mate was that if they couldn’t tell James they were together, they also couldn’t tell anyone else. And if Sirius and Remus had one thing in common it was their persistence, usually taken as sheer stubbornness by everyone else, especially when it came to pranks.

And so Sirius found himself absolutely fuming about a week after they had gotten together, pacing up and down their dorm while his boyfriend laid on his bed, an exasperated expression on his face.

‘’I don’t know how many times I have to tell you this but Clark Moss was not flirting with me,’’ the werewolf sighed. Sirius stopped in his track, throwing his arms in the air before exclaiming a mocking ‘’Ha!’’ before resuming his fuming, leaving Remus to groan and fall back into the mattress. They had been through this ritual three times now.

‘’He was just asking for my notes in astronomy, Pads, there was absolutely no need to put that leg twisting jinx on him,’’ Remus exclaimed from the bed. Sirius scoffed mockingly, coming to a halt in front of his bed with his arms crossed over his chest.

‘’It wasn’t what he said it’s how he said it. ‘Oh, Remus, your handwriting is just so elegant, no wonder you’re top of every class. I wish I had your handwriting,’. Absolutely vile, that damn prat,’’ Sirius spat and Remus couldn’t help the laugh that escaped his lips.

‘’What’s wrong with that?’’ he chuckled, sitting up while supporting himself on his elbows.

The Gryffindor scoffed again, his crossed arms moving to rest on his hips,

‘’No bloke compliments another bloke's handwriting if he doesn’t want to sleep with him, Moony, even you should know that. And the way he kept getting closer and closer to you, I can only imagine the look in his eyes! I should have put something much worse than that leg twisting jinx on him. Next time I’ll make his eyebrows disappear or better-’’

‘’Alright, alright!’’ Remus laughed, interrupting his boyfriend's rant by sitting up properly and looking up to him.

‘’I’m very sorry you were upset by him but even if he did flirt with me, which he didn’t-’’

Sirius opened his mouth to protest but at that moment Remus's eyes darkened and he hooked a finger through a loop of Sirius's trousers before pulling him closer, effectively shutting him up.

‘’But if he was, it doesn’t matter. He isn’t you so I really couldn’t give less of a damn about him,’’ Moony finally declared and Sirius felt his anger suddenly vaporized, replaced by sheer glee which was reflected by the smug grin on his face.

He reached his head out to push the hair out of his boyfriend's face before running his fingers over his scalp, making the werewolf close his eyes in satisfaction and hum.

Sirius was about to lean down to kiss him when the door to their dorm opened, leaving the couple frozen in place, his hand still in Remus's hair while standing in front of his bed with the boy on it.

‘’Interesting,’’ they could hear James say before Sirius had even had the chance to turn around. Remus and Sirius exchanged a quick look before equally mischievous grins appeared on their faces.

‘’What is, Prongs?’’ Sirius asked innocently, turning around, hand still not leaving the other’s head.

James' eyebrows rose up as his eyes landed on Sirius hand as well as noting the close proximity between his friends.

‘’This is,’’ he proclaimed, waving his hand in their general direction. Sirius furrowed his brows before turning to Remus who had an equally put on an expression of confusion on his face.

‘’Do you know what he’s talking about?’’

‘’Absolutly no clue,’’

‘’Whatever could you mean, Jamie? I was just checking to see if Remus's hair needed a trim,’’ Sirius expressed calmy, letting his hand run through Remus’s hair once again for good measure as if he really wanted to check out the other’s length. He could see Moony bit back a laugh and moved his head back around to face James in fear that he couldn’t control his own laughter if he met Remus's eye.

‘’Right, sure,’’ James said slowly, suddenly blinking rapidly in confusion. His scrutinizing eyes never left them as he made his way to the bathroom and he even entered in backwards before the door finally closed before him and Sirius and Remus could release the laughter they had been holding back. Remus fell back into the pillows with a hand over his mouth and Sirius practically on top of him, laughing into the other’s tummy.

‘’How long do you think he’ll take?’’ Remus whispered frantically as he wiped a tear from his eyes. Sirius just shrugged, feeling hot in his face from the strain of refraining himself to laugh out loud, before he quickly moved up to kiss the other’s lips.

‘’We’ll see who caves first,’’ he laughed, Moony returning the sound sweetly and soft against his lips, making Sirius kiss him again. They heard the toilet flush and sprung apart and only a second later James stepped out, his eyes glued to their flushed faces and knowing smiles with utter confusion. 

It wasn’t until another week and a multitude of similar incidents later that Sirius found himself sitting on the sofa in front of the fireplace in the common when suddenly an uncomfortable hot breath ghosted over his ear,

‘’I know what you are doing,’’ 

Sirius recognized the voice of his sworn brother immediately and he fought every impulse in his body to flinch away from the uncomfortable proximity, James quite literally breathing down his neck.

‘’I have no idea what you mean but if you could get my neck out of your face I’d appreciate it,’’ he said, as nonchalantly as he could manage.

James scoffed before jumping over the sofa in one swift motion, show off, before standing in front of the fireplace with crossed arms, using his height as an advantage to glower down at Sirius. 

‘’I know there’s something going on with Moony,’’ he proclaimed. 

Sirius suppressed a snort at that and just leaned back into the sofa.

‘’You mean that he’s the object of my unrequited love?’’ the Gryffindor asked, sighing dramatically for good measure.

‘’Yeah, unrequited my ass. You thought it would be funny to wave it in front of my face but then deny it, didn’t you?’’

Sirius couldn’t help the smug smile that overcame his face yet only shrugged, unwilling to give up even in the obvious face of defeat.

‘’Don’t know what you’re talking about, Prongsie,’’ he said simply.

‘’Oh please. I know you two started fucking. I caught him in your bed three times by now, Pads,’’ James said defiantly. 

‘’Nightmares,’’ he simply shrugged.

‘’You’re literally wearing his sweater, Sirius,’’

‘’Wash day mixed up our laundry,’’

‘’Alright. What about how you were practically undressing him with your eyes at breakfast? How you’re always undressing him with your eyes. Or how you two snuck off during care for magical creatures last Tuesday? And how your entire back is mysteriously covered in hickeys and scratches and don't even deny it, I saw it in the changing room, an image by the way that will haunt me forever. Now, do I need to go on? Name the people you’ve hexed because they talked to Moony or hell even looked at him for a second too long in alphabetical order?’’

James' chest was slightly heaving by the end of his rant, his hair messed up even more than usual from the number of times he ran his hands through it in distress and his glasses had become a little lopsided. Sirius smiled devilishly before waving his hand to gesture him to go on.

‘’If you could do that I’m sure that would be very amusing,’’ he teased, earning a kick in the shin from his best friend.

‘’Ouch, what the hell? Alright, alright, we’re dating!’’ Sirius exclaimed as James threatened him with even more physical violence, holding up a pillow so manically Sirius was afraid he was about to get smothered with it. 

‘’I knew it! You tosser!’’ James exclaimed, now tackling Sirius onto the sofa in a friendly manner, ruffling his hair and congratulating him on finally getting his shit together.

Sirius laughed brightly, enduring the few jabs he got for keeping it from him, too happy to finally be able to boast about it.

‘’I bet it was all Moony’s idea, it practically reeks of him. You probably wanted to tell me the second it happened as I did with Lily,’’ James exclaimed after they had settled down from their wrestling, his legs over Sirius's laps as both had comfortably settled into the sofa.

‘’I’ll never forget how you ran up to scream like you had just won the Quidditch world cup before your entire face just drained itself of blood when you realized you had just left her and then had to run all the way back to the black lake,’’ Sirius chuckled, shaking his head fondly at the memory.

‘’I probably lost forty pounds that night alone,’’ James sighed. 

‘’You’re right, the prank was Moony’s idea though I came up with acting suspiciously and not telling you. He wanted to pretend we had a fight but I thought that would stress you out too much,’’

‘’Cheers, mate, I still have grey hairs from last year’s ordeal that shall never be mentioned. My mom has to charm them,’’ James sighed and Sirius shifted uncomfortably. 

‘’I’m glad it’s finally over though, even if it was a laugh. You can’t imagine how many people I had to fend off though, it’s insane. When did our shy little Moony suddenly become so popular? Fucking ladies man as well, I could be sucking his dick in front of the great hall and they’d still bring him chocolate and shit,’’ Sirius groaned, sinking further into the sofa.

‘’Well, that’s a mental image I’m never gonna get out,’’ James shuddered. 

‘’Oh hush, you. The guys are even worse so I’m glad when we can finally announce we’re dating. I’m planning something big that will shut them all up,’’

‘’Fireworks?’’

‘’Wouldn’t be a marauder announcement without fireworks, would it?’’

‘’Mh, Moony’s going to act like he hates it but secretly he’ll be absolutely thrilled,’’

‘’That’s my Moony,’’

‘’But, you know…’’ 

James' thoughtful tone piqued Sirius's interest and he found that same mischievousness in his friend's eyes that all the marauders expressed when they had come up with something new.

‘’What are you cooking up in that brain of yours?’’ he asked, feeling that familiar thrill in his heart he always got at the thought of planning a prank with his best friend.

‘’Well, I just realized that Remus doesn’t know that I know. And we all know he’s one persistent fucker,’’

Sirius had to laugh, already knowing where his friend's intentions were headed but indulging him nonetheless.

‘’So?’’ he asked. 

James turned to him, smirking happily.

‘’I say we see how far he’s willing to take his little charade,’’ the Gryffindor proclaimed, a wicked glint in his bespectacled eyes. Sirius laughed, shaking his head at his friend's antics.

‘’I don’t know if I could double cross my boyfriend like that, what if he withholds my daily dose of hugs?’’ Sirius asked, battling his eyelashes. James pretended to throw up, earning him a slap on his thigh.

‘’Don’t pretend that I am more disgusting than you are with Lils,’’

‘’Fair point. Now, come on, you wanna see Moony cave just as much as I do, don’t you?’’ 

‘’Ha! As if he would! But I’ll humour you, my friend. I won’t tell him that you know, it’ll be fun to try and seduce him all over again,’’ Sirius said, wiggling his eyebrows to which James snorted.

‘’Oh please, you didn’t seduce him, he just happened to be drunk and horny so you finally got lucky,’’ 

‘’You wound me, Potter,’’

The opportunity presented itself all too easily when the marauders were invited to a Hufflepuff party that night by the Quidditch team captain in terms of sportsmanship and whatnot. Hufflepuff parties generally weren’t as chaotic as the Gryffindor ones and that, as well as the promise of weed, was the only thing that had motivated Moony to come along as the werewolf was beginning to feel agitated by the upcoming full moon. 

When Sirius and Remus entered the common room, letting go of each other’s hands, James and Peter were already there, talking to the Quidditch Captain and some more members of the team excitedly about an upcoming match of a famous Quidditch team. 

Sirius, sensing that Remus's tolerance for Quidditch related conversations was stretched thin, put his arm around his boyfriend’s shoulder and led him to the corner of the common room where some students, some of them they knew, some they didn’t, were passing a joint between them.

‘’Cheers! Room for two more?’’ Sirius asked, putting on the infamous smile that got gotten him out of detention or into a broom closet on more than a few occasions.

‘’Oh, hi, Lupin! Sit down!’’ some fifth-year Sirius didn’t know exclaimed happily and Sirius scowled. 

The interaction had made Remus laugh as he turned to squeeze Sirius's arm before settling down into open the space the Hufflepuffs had made for them.

‘’Hi, Sirius,’’ a voice drawled and Sirius turned to see a vaguely familiar girl smirk at him across from him and he blinked once before placing her face in his memory. Terrified he remembered snogging her once around the fourth year and he visibly tensed, something that didn’t go unnoticed by his boyfriend next to him. 

Sirius turned to glance at him and watched as Moony’s eyes wandered between him to the girl who was smirking as she eyed the Gryffindor up and down.

‘’Oh,’’ he simply said and Sirius knew just from that how fucked he was. 

He considered getting up but in that second someone passed Remus the joint and without ever taking his eyes off Sirius he accepted it, raising it to his lips before saying, ‘’Cheers,’’ and taking a hit. 

The whole action had made Sirius gulp, he didn’t know whether from the awkwardness of the situation or the intensity of Remus's stare which unsettled him in a strange but also delightful way. Sirius always craved the other’s boys' full attention and now he had, even if admittedly in a supposedly uncomfortable way, it did nothing but excite him. 

As expected, the weed helped lighten things up and after a while Sirius had almost forgotten about the whole ex thing, laughing as he leaned into Remus's side, the werewolf smiling in a way that made the corners of his eyes crinkle which Sirius absolutely adored.

James and Peter had joined them too and had begun passing alcohol around. James, in true party fashion, had suggested they play a game and soon the entire common room was involved in a daring game, combined of who would you rather and smash or pass in which you had to say who’d of the two presented choices you’d smash and who you’d pass.

‘’Hagrid or Filch?’’ Peter asked Charles Connolly who had invited them, earning a round of boos as well as appreciation for having thought of such a vile combination.

The rules were simple, you had to answer or you had to drink. The catch was that you had to choose between an assemble of shot glasses presented in the middle of their circle, some of which contained vodka and some of which contained potion that had the same appearance as vodka yet tasted more like, well, piss seemed to be the consensual agreement though Sirius had doubted and hoped that no one present had ever actually tasted…well.

Connolly took a shot instead of answering and landed a bad one, earning a round of laughter and applause. 

‘’Potter!’’ called the person Connolly had picked before, and James perked up immediately. 

Everyone knew he would answer, James Potter was never one to back down from a challenge. Sirius vaguely recognized the guy who called on him as someone who would join Moony’s study session from time to time. He didn’t have a grudge against the boy, he was one of the few who didn’t seem to have a crush on Remus, yet he tensed slightly when the boy’s eyes landed on his boyfriend next to him before moving on to Sirius himself, a smirk on his face.

‘’Between your best mates, who’d you smash, Lupin or Black?’’ 

Without even an ounce of hesitation that could’ve given anyone the time to properly react to the question James instantly blurted out,

‘’Remus,’’ 

Afterwards, the entire room, excluding those who were too hammered to know what was going on, erupted in laughter, Moony next to him laughing the loudest. Sirius's mouth had fallen open and he stared at his drunken friend in shock who just blinked once as if surprised by himself.

‘’Wow, I answered that like way too fast. Sorry, Pads,’’ the Gryffindor shrugged, the comment going over most people's heads as they were too busy laughing. 

‘Traitor’ Sirius mouthed at him, making a cutting motion across his neck. James just laughed drunkenly.

‘’Ah, I’m honoured,’’ Remus declared, laughing even as Sirius pushed his elbow into his side.

‘’Now you get to choose, Potter!’’ someone called out. Mischief immediately made itself known in James' eyes and Sirius’s, drunken and hazed brain, took a moment to catch up before he knew where this was going.

‘’Well then, Rem, the object of all my desires,’’

This earned him another round of laughter and a murderous glare from Sirius,

‘’Who would you rather, Sirius or Danny Mcallister?’’

That was a low blow to Sirius, even though James probably didn’t intend it as such. 

Danny Mcallister was the Ravenclaw prefect, a star student and absolutely stunning. In the school's unofficial ranking he came right after Sirius, James and Remus who held the top spots for fittest students. During Remus's prefect days many people had pointed out how well they’d fit together and it was rumoured that he had been Remus's first kiss, and though Sirius knew it had been a boy from his hometown, it still bothered him immensely. Despite the fact that he was good-looking he was also a perfect match for Remus, at least so people thought since he was just as bookish and academically inclined.

Sirius scoffed which was overturned by the cheers surrounding the question. Sirius turned to look at Remus expectantly and he found the werewolf smirking, leaning in while supporting himself on his arms, and the rolled back sleeves of his shirts revealing the veins and scars that graced his arms, making Sirius shift uncomfortably for a now different reason.

‘’Mmh, that’s a tough one,’’ Remus said nonchalantly, his eyes never leaving Sirius who suddenly felt very hot.

Some girls giggled and Sirius could see Remus’ eyes wander over to a familiar spot across from them for just a second before he reached out to place Sirius's chin between his fingers, making the boy’s breath hitch. Remus turned Sirius's head from one side to another gently as if he was expecting him. Sirius’s foggy brain now seemed completely clouded. Was Moony flirting with him, in front of all these people?

‘’I guess I’ll take this one,’’ Remus said with a wicked smile as we proceeded to wink at Sirius, he actually winked at him, leaving the renowned heartbreaker of Hogwarts blushing furiously, the Gryffindor shaking his head so that his long hair would fall over his face and hide his embarrassing flush. 

Sirius's uncharacteristic shyness caused a lot of whistles and cheers from the party and he heard Remus next to him laugh before nudging him with his knee as if to apologize to him.

‘’Only the Casanova of Gryffindor tower could get Sirius Black to blush!’’ someone called out, earning a round of agreeing laughter and Sirius put his face into his hands, groaning deeply. 

The game moved on when Remus naturally called on Peter, making him decide between Mcgonnagal and Dumbledore, resulting in another failed shot before Peter chose someone else.

By now Remus had pulled out a cigarette and was leaning back on his arms again, blowing the smoke up into the air, highlighting that sharp jawline that Sirius was absolutely weak for,  and Sirius could do nothing but sit there in trance, not even hiding his admiration. Moony was the coolest and hottest person he knew, no matter how cringy that might sound, and once again he wondered how he had waited so long before making him his.

‘’Be careful or you’ll catch flies, Black!’’ James called out in an obvious attempt to rattle an indication of their relationship out of them like he had been doing all evening. 

Remus's eye met James’ and he gave the Quidditch Captain the finger, earning a laugh. Sirius smiled privately at his boyfriend, not even aware of the other people in the room anymore.

‘’Are you two like together or what?’’ a shrill voice suddenly pierced through Sirius little bubble of just him and his boyfriend and his head turned to see Lacey, Lucy, god he didn’t even know her name anymore, glare at the two of them across the room. A sort of hush fell over those left, really not many since most were either knocked out by now or making out with each other, and Sirius was all too well aware of James’ and Peter’s eyes specifically on them.

Remus's eyes locked with those of the girl across from the room and he exhaled smoke slowly, saying nothing. Sirius felt that the tension might snap him in half so he ran a nervous hand through his hand, chuckling awkwardly in hopes of diffusing the tension in the room.

‘’Christ, I need a fag,’’ he murmured, more to himself than anyone. 

Remus hummed and Sirius's eyes snapped to him, though to be fair they never really were off him for long, and watched as Remus got that devious glint in his eyes he usually had when planning a prank, though this time there was something else in his eyes, something darker and lustful as he brought the cigarette to his lips and inhaled deeply. Then his eyes landed back on Sirius, looking right through him, to the marrow of his existence, and the raven-haired felt the desire that had been burning up inside of him all evening unravel itself. He didn’t even need to question it when Moony leaned forward, his eyes fixated on Sirius’s lips just as his had been on Remus’. Expecting a kiss, he opened his mouth willingly in anticipation but Moony had other plans as he used the hand still holding the fag between his elegant fingers to grab Sirius's face to keep him steady while he let his lips ghost only mere inches over Sirius’ as he blew the smoke from his mouth into Sirius. 

At that moment there existed no one but them and Sirius could feel himself smile before his brain even registered the emotions that had caused it. After inhaling the smoke he could no longer hold himself back and moved forward, connecting their lips in a messy and needy kiss which Remus returned all too willingly, Sirius feeling an equally happy smile move against his own.

Eventually, Remus pulled back, his pupils widened so much they could entail galaxies and smirked.

‘’That answer your question?’’ he called across the room and Sirius had to bite his lip to keep from groaning. Next to them, they could hear James holler with laughter and Peter sigh deeply, releasing a long built-up ‘’Finally,’’.

Sirius smiled brightly, too happy for his own good, and took Remus's hand in his, the boy he loved more than anything in the world smiling back at him, his eyes reflecting the same emotions.

Mine, he thought.

All mine.