Chapter 20
Fair morn, King Hackblade.
I'm going to get interviewed eventually, probably by Skeeter. Even with my guardians present, there's no guarantee that she'll write what I want. Do you have any blackmail on her?
May your gold flow,
Harrison
Fair eve, Harrison.
You are my client, Harrison, and I gave you permission to call me by my name. No need to call me 'king.'
Miss Skeeter is an illegal Animagus: a beetle. I have sent pictures just in case.
She also has snuck into Ministry trials, which is considered treason.
May your enemies die at your hand,
Hackblade
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"Like 'em, do you, Potter?" Ernie sneered.
Harrison knew he was referring to the badge on his chest, as well as the ones pinned on the crowd behind him. The ones that said Potter Stinks.
"Like what, MacMillian?" Harrison said absently around his goblet of espresso.
"The badges!" Ernie said angrily.
"What badges?"
"The ones we're wearing!"
"Oh, those," Harrison said distractedly. "They don't really go with your outfit, MacMillian." He ignored the quiet sniggering coming from his friends.
"You're not mad?" Ernie said indignantly.
"Mad about what?"
"The badges!"
"What badges?"
Ron and the twins roared with laughter. Fred and George fell off of the bench dramatically. Sirius grinned from the staff table.
"Arg!" Ernie snarled.
"Yes?" Harrison said, looking up at him blankly. "Oh -- interesting fashion statement," he added, as if just seeing the badges. "Who made them?"
"I did," said Terry Boot.
"Hmm. I swear I took a shower this morning," Harrison said in a puzzled tone. "Draco, do I stink?"
"You smell like lavender and daffodils," Draco assured him, glowering at the group.
Harrison blushed. "Thank you." He tapped his chin. "Can I have one?"
"What?" Ernie frowned.
"Can I have a badge?" Harrison said innocently.
"What the Merlin for?"
"Because I want one," Harrison replied simply.
Terry handed him a badge, looking resigned. Ernie was still looking astounded.
"Thanks," Harrison grinned. He set it on the table and tapped it with his wand. Three more badges appeared. Harrison tapped each of the badges, and they changed to say, Support Marauders Junior! Support Victor Krum! Support Fleur Delacour!
"Hmm, what does this button do?" Harrison hummed, seeing the button on the badge Terry had given him. He tapped it and the letters changed to say, Support Cedric Diggory -- The REAL Hogwarts Champion!
"Well, you have that part right," Harrison told Terry. "I'm representing the Marauders Junior, not Hogwarts. Cedric can represent you idiots. I'm representing the people who love me even if I speak Parseltongue." He tapped the buttons on the other three badges.
The Marauders Junior's changed to say And a partridge in a pear tree.
Viktor's changed to Luke, I am your father.
And Fleur's changed to Ayyy, Macarena!
Harrison's friends burst out laughing.
"Hey, Champion's Chaos, what do you think of the new badges?" Harrison called. Viktor, Fleur, Cedric, Aleksei and Juliette came over to study them.
Aleksei cackled. "I did not know you knew Muggle books, Harrison."
"I grew up with my mother's sister," Harrison replied, grinning.
"Vhat is Macarena?" Viktor asked in confusion. "And who is Luke?"
"Ah, I must introduce you to Star Wars!" Harrison exclaimed. "Macarena is the name of a song. I need more ideas!"
"Potter!" Ernie seethed.
"Go away, we're planning chaos," Harrison told the boy.
Ernie yanked out his wand and yelled, "Densaugeo!" A jet of light shot out of his wand, missing Harrison entirely and hitting Hermione, who was sitting beside him.
Hermione screeched and covered her mouth.
"Where the f*ck did you learn how to aim?" Harrison snarled at Ernie, who blanched. He turned to Hermione. "Mia, does your mouth hurt?"
She whimpered.
Harrison glanced up and hid a smirk. Snape was standing right behind Ernie; how the f*ck did he do that? Harrison would have to ask him.
"Detention, Mr. MacMillian," Snape whispered icily. Ernie jumped and went gray. "And fifty points from Hufflepuff."
Cedric glared at him. "Just because you don't believe Harrison doesn't mean you should attack him!"
"But -- but Cedric, he-"
"Is a person?" Cedric snarled. Harrison blinked. He'd never seen Cedric this angry.
"Hufflepuffs," Draco muttered, looking awed and irritated at the same time.
"Mr. Potter, take Miss Granger to the hospital wing," Snape said tightly. "And then report to Professor McGonagall's office. The champions are meeting there for the weighing of wands and-" he wrinkled his nose "-interviews."
"Ced, can you tell Sirius and Remus to meet me in McGonagall's office?" Harrison asked as he stood up. "You should write your parents, too. Minors aren't supposed to get interviewed without their parents present."
Fleur blinked in alarm and ran out. Huh. Harrison hadn't realized that she wasn't seventeen yet.
"I'll ask a house-elf to call them," Cedric decided, heading up to the staff table.
"Work on these while we're gone?" Harrison asked Aleksei and Juliette, who were looking furious.
"Batard," Juliette muttered. "Oui, Harrison." She gave Hermione a worried smile.
Harrison took a sobbing Hermione up to the hospital wing. By the time they got there, her teeth had grown past her chin.
"Madam Pomfrey?" Harrison asked loudly. The woman came bustling out of her office, frowning, and gasped when she saw Hermione. "Could you please help Mia? She got cursed."
"Of course, dear," she said worriedly, taking Hermione over to a bed. "I'm going to cast a spell on your teeth, tell me when they get back to the way they were before."
"Okay," Hermione whispered.
"Mr. Potter?" Madam Pomfrey said in a puzzled tone when she saw he was still there.
"I have a question, I'll wait until Mia's healed, ma'am," Harrison said politely.
She turned back to Hermione and flicked her wand. The teeth began shrinking, although not as quickly as they had grown.
A few minutes later, Hermione said, "When -- um, I mean, now."
Madam Pomfrey cut off the spell, raising an eyebrow.
"It's a Muggle thing," Harrison told her. "Usually, it's with how much sugar you want in your tea."
"Thank you, Madam Pomfrey," Hermione smiled.
"Wow, Mia! You look even prettier!" Harrison grinned, and Hermione's cheeks flushed. Madam Pomfrey frowned.
"I um..." Hermione blushed. "I had buckteeth before MacMillian cursed me, and I've been begging my parents to let me get them shrunk, so I... I let you go on a bit longer. Sorry, Madam Pomfrey."
"Quite all right," the woman said gently. "You may return to class, if you wish. If you feel tightness or pain in your mouth, please tell me."
Hermione nodded, hugged Harrison, and left.
"You had a question, Mr. Potter?" Madam Pomfrey asked.
"Yes -- how come you didn't notice I was being abused?" Harrison asked, his voice very calm but his eyes full of ice.
Pomfrey paled. "You -- excuse me, what?"
"You're a Healer. Shouldn't you notice when kids have more scars than usual, flinch away from contact, have trouble trusting adults?" Harrison said softly.
Pomfrey sucked in a breath. "I... I am not a full Healer, Mr. Potter," she whispered.
"Well, that explains it," Harrison said smoothly. "Obviously, not being a full Healer would make it impossible to notice signs of trouble at home."
She flinched.
"Is there a full Healer that you could recommend that doesn't trust Dumbledore?" Harrison asked. "And I'm not explaining why I don't trust Dumbledore."
"...Lady Narcissa Malfoy," she responded hoarsely.
"Thank you." Harrison left without another word.
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"Champion number four!" Ludo Bagman said brightly when Harrison entered.
"Hello, Mr. Excited-to-See-a-Minor-in-a-Dangerous-Tournament," Harrison said blandly, earning frowns from the other three champions. The reporter in the corner of the room perked up.
Bagman winced. "Ha-"
"What did I say about my first name."
"Mr. Potter-"
"Very good, Mr. Bagman!" Harrison said brightly, earning cackles from Sirius and a sigh from Remus. "Let's get the f*ck on with it. Would someone explain what wand weighing is?"
"Just checking to see if your wand is fully functional," Bagman said nervously.
"Pog." Harrison plopped into a chair between Cedric and Fleur, who was giggling. "Well met, magicals," he added to the reporter and photographer. "Heir Black."
"Rita Skeeter," said the woman, eyes glittering.
"Bozo," said the photographer shortly.
Harrison's eyes lit up, and Remus groaned. "Really? Your name is Bozo? That's, uh... a really interesting name." Sirius snickered.
Bozo gave him an unimpressed look. "You were raised by Muggles."
Harrison grinned maniacally.
"I've heard every clown joke imaginable, so don't bother," Bozo said blithely.
"Aw." Harrison pouted. "You're no fun. Miss Skeeter, you're here for an interview, I'm assuming?"
"I am," Skeeter said, giving a crocodile smile.
"Excellent. Why don't my guardians and I join you in the abandoned classroom across the hall?" Harrison asked sweetly. Skeeter's smile faltered slightly.
A moment later, the four of them were seated in a dusty classroom. Judging by the marks on the desks, it had been for Alchemy.
(Harrison wondered if Nicolas Flamel was really dead, and if it would be funny if he asked Flamel to teach Alchemy at Hogwarts.)
"Miss Skeeter," Harrison said, "before we begin, there's a few things I'd like to establish."
Miss Skeeter, who had pulled out a Quick-Quotes Quill, looked up curiously.
"Uncle Moony, would you be so kind as to cast an Anti-Eavesdropping Ward?" Harrison asked him.
Frowning a little, Remus did as told. Sirius was giving him a childishly interested look.
Harrison's expression became cold. "Miss Skeeter, I am aware of your bugging."
She blanched.
"And I have proof." He pulled one of the pictures from his bag and removed the glamour, revealing a picture of a beetle.
Skeeter turned green.
"And I will be sending all of the pictures, most of which are in a secure location-" Snape's office "-to the Ministry if you do not write exactly what I tell you to."
The woman nodded, swallowing.
"Now -- aren't you wondering why Dumbledore hasn't tried to get a minor out of a dangerous tournament?" Harrison asked sweetly.
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The Daily Prophet
The Quadwizard Tournament
As the Wizarding World are now aware, Hogwarts School is hosting the Triwizard Tournament. Usually, only three champions are chosen, one from each school, who then compete against each other in a series of trials.
In the past, the tournament was open to all ages, which led to a very high death toll of children. This year, the Ministry and the heads of the three schools have agreed to only allow those who would turn seventeen in January to join. Albus Dumbledore, our revered Chief Mugwump, Head of the Wizengamont, and defeater of Grindelwald, was in charge of placing wards around the impartial judge, the Goblet of Fire, so that only those who turned seventeen in January would be able to enter.
But he did not put a ward on the goblet that would stop students from entering other people's names. Because as we all know, Albus Dumbledore believes the best of people, and would never believe that a child could be so petty as to enter a rival's name into a dangerous, deadly tournament.
On the night of Halloween, the Goblet of Fire was ready to choose the "three" champions. Viktor Krum, the Durmstrang Champion; Fleur Apolline Delacour, the Beauxbatons Champion; and Cedric Diggory, the Hogwarts Champion, were chosen without any trouble. But just as Hogwarts was ready to celebrate, the Goblet picked a fourth champion -- a champion who had no desire to be part of the tournament.
Our savior: Harrison James Potter.
The entire school was outraged; they had immediately assumed that a fourteen-year-old child, who, before, had rarely run into danger except to rescue someone, and was certainly not powerful enough to hoodwink an ancient artifact, had entered his own name. They had witnessed several sixteen-year-olds attempt to enter their own names, being ejected by Dumbledore's wards, and still believed the worst of our savior. Even when Heir Black swore upon his magic that he had not entered his name, and had not asked an older child to, several students still believed that he had cheated.
A child -- a child who had lost his parents at a young age and had been forced to live with abusive guardians for thirteen years -- was now magic-bound to participate in a tournament that had killed countless children in ages past.
And what did Albus Dumbledore do?
Nothing.
He has not been investigating who put Heir Black's name in the goblet. He has not been tirelessly searching for a way to remove Heir Black from a deadly tournament. He did not even make a speech about Heir Black's innocence.
How can we trust Albus Dumbledore with our children if he has done nothing to help Harrison Potter?
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Fair eve, Mr. Dumbledore.
After investigating your vaults, we have discovered that you have been stealing from several of our clients, including one Heir Black. We will be returning every Knut, and evidence of your thievery will be sent to DMLE Director Amelia Bones.
Your vaults have been seized and depleted, as well as the illegitimate ones you had set up with false identities.
Your brother will now be in charge of your finances. You will no longer be allowed to set foot in Gringotts.
We have also discovered that you are not paying your staff the amount of money they are owed. We have seized the school accounts and placed them under the control of the Board of Governors. Lord Malfoy and Lady Longbottom were particularly displeased when they discovered your duplicity.
May your enemies die at your hand,
King Hackblade of the Goblin Nation
Head of Gringotts Bank
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Fair eve, Mrs. Weasley.
After investigating your vaults, we have discovered that you have been stealing from our client, Heir Black. Your vault has been seized, and we will be returning every Knut. Evidence of your thievery will be sent to DMLE Director Amelia Bones.
Your husband will be in charge of your finances from this moment forward. You will no longer be allowed to step foot in Gringotts.
May your enemies die at your hand,
King Hackblade of the Goblin Nation
Head of Gringotts Bank
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Dear Mr. Potter,
Would you please come see me in my office at 5:00 today? I am particularly fond of Licorice Pops.
Sincerely,
Albus Dumbledore