As Idiots Do

Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
F/F
F/M
M/M
G
As Idiots Do
Summary
James texts the wrong number. The last thing he expected was a sarcastic person that would change his and his bestfriend's whole world. This is a college wrong number fic babes, mistakes were made. And apparently, Sirius and Remus really need to get their shit together. Mary, Lily, and (even) Marlene are complete angels. Regulus really didn't think responding to a random number calling him a dick would change his life but it did. Unexpected reunions, lost causes, and a lot of shit that we can't control. And apparently, Barty and Evan really need to get their shit together. Pandora, Dorcas, and Andromeda are complete angels.
All Chapters Forward

Taste the Rainbow

The Three Stooges

Scorpio

So, theoretically. 

Does sharing a book and calling each other by last names mean dating?

 

Aries

Yes. 

Unless it's about Moony, then a hard yes. 

 

Leo

James!

Fuck.

Well, I would say first make sure that it wasn't a date. 

Because plenty of people go on book things with friends.

I mean I know I do.

Aries

But it's Moony.

 

Scorpio

Fuck. You're not helping Potter. 

 

Leo

Potter?

Aries

Jesus fuck Pads, next you'll tell him how I look too. 

 

Scorpio

Tall, devilishly handsome. Usually with a sexy mf next to him. 

 

Leo

Pads. Focus.

Scorpio

I'm #coping

Leo

You're #avoiding

Fuck. I hate hashtags with a passion why did I do that.

Scorpio

Because I am copy-able. 

Leo

Just ask him.

Do you see him at any point today?

Scorpio

Well...we are supposed to watch a movie tonight. 

Which originally was supposed to be a date

Until they brought up book-boyfriend and I panicked. 

And said I didn't know they had friends. 

And then they asked if I was ok. 

Leo

.....

Ok that isn't as bad as I thought it was meant to be.

Aries

Pads is very dramatic. 

 

Scorpio

Am not. 

 

Aries

Are too. 

 

Scorpio

This is homophobic.

Leo

Istg. 

Why am I stuck here.

Anyways back to the topic...

you guys are sharing dinner...and a movie

its already a date no?

Aries 

Well then by those standards Pads and I dated ages ago. 

 

Scorpio

But it's moony :((((

so it's special... :((((

 

Aries

GASP

did our movie dates mean nothing? :(

 

Scorpio

You know I didn't mean it my beloved!

 

Aries

I'm afraid this is over pads :(((

 

Scorpio

Nooooo. Husband come back!

 

Aries

Never. 

 

Leo

I'm going to go get hit by a bus.

This is what I get for giving advice to strangers on the internet.

 

Taste the Rainbow 

Sourpatch Kids

I'm done with idiots. 

 

Tootsie Rollz 

REG HI WHY ARE YOU TEXTING DURING YOUR CLASS?

lol imagine if I actually said that.

Sourpatch Kids

Barty...what did I say about the names? 

Also I thought someone stole your phone for a second.

 

Airheadz

Please, you totally make sense as sour patch, so for once I agree with Barty.

 

Tootsie Rollz

For once???

Wtf Rosier.

Airheadz

Eh sorry not sorry crouch. 

Plus its not like anyone disagrees.

@Skittles @JellyBelly

 

Skittles

Fuck. Rosier. I was about to talk to the blonde in my class before my phone pinged so fucking loud. 

And yeah I agree with Rosier, Crouch isn't usually right about stuff. 

 

Airheadz

Shit. Sorry. 

@skittles 

@skittles 

@skittles 

 

Skittles

I will end you. 

 

Airheadz

Ooooo fun. Ask Panda if she'll join and I'll be game. 

 

Jelly Belly

Personally, I wouldn't touch Rosier with a 10 foot pole

 

Airheadz

You're so sweet to me <3

 Jelly Belly 

Of course <3

 

Skittles

Careful or toots over here will get jealous 

Tootsie Roll

????

No I wouldn't?

Evan and I aren't anything.

Airheadz

Oh?

 

Tootsie Roll

Shut it Rosier.

Airheadz

Oh please babes, you are drooling for me. 

Tootsie Roll

In your fucking dreams.

Sourpatch Kids

Great. You've set them off again. 

Like I said.

I am done with idiots.

Bye <3

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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