Siriusly In Trouble
And you're callin' my phone, you're all alone
And I'm sensin' some undertone
And I'm right here with all my friends
But you're sendin' me your new address
"You're so pretty" Sirius tells Remus not for the first time that evening during their ancient runes tutoring session. He blushes again even as he rolls his eyes
"See what I mean when Reg speaks in other languages?" James nudges him
"Can you two shut up? You can drool over them all you want later,” Ursa glares at them “his groupies are about to come in and I want to finish this rune first"
"They aren't my groupies"
"dysgwch i mi beth mae'r rhedyn hwn yn ei wneud" teach me what this rune does she orders him and he rolls his eyes, he translated that phrase for her during their last study session but he hadn't expected for her to remember it faultlessly and use it as a command for the thousandth time this past hour.
He complies and finishes up his explanation just as Peter comes in "How's Welsh?"
"Hot" Sirius supplies "I think I might like studying now. I may be in need of a study session"
"No." Remus shuts him down
"Wha— Moony! Why not?!"
"tu n'es pas le seul à baver pour lui" you're not the only one that drools for him Ursa slides off her chair and whispers to him with a smug smirk
"Wha— Moony! Is that true?!"
"I don't know french but probably not"
"I'm going with yes" James scratches his chin in thought "you said the entire study group has a crush on Remus, didn't you?"
"Ten points for Gryffindor" she bops his nose and Sirius gasps
"Moony, is this true?"
"Of course not"
"He also thought you didn't have a crush on him and trust me, you were obvious about it" Regulus hums because what do little siblings do better together than annoying the older one?
"That's it, we're staying"
"And we’re leaving" Ursa tells them just as the study group starts to pour in, led by Lily
"I was actually already planning on staying, I can't get that last conjuring spell right" Peter slumps down on the chair Regulus just vacated, all the rest are filling up fast. Remus’ groupies are quick
"The bouquet of flowers?"
"Yeah, that's the one"
"We’re doing History of Magic and Care of Magical Creatures today, but I can show it to you tonight if you want”
“I can teach it to him if you want” Emmeline offers with a shy smile taking the last empty seat which happens to be right next to Peter. What a coincidence.
“You don’t mind?” Peter blushes
“Mind teaching me too?” Ursa asks with a flatter of lashes because Pettigrew’s an idiot and apparently this is what she’s gonna be doing tonight “We haven’t covered that yet”
“You need help conjuring up flowers?” he scoffs before he thinks
“Yes Pet” he hears the warning in those two words even if they don’t sound that way to anyone else
“Of course not. Why don’t you take my seat, I’ll find another chair”
“No need,” she waves her off and sits directly on Peter’s lap like she’s done it a thousand times before. Peter rest his head against her side, his furious blush hidden behind her body and hair, hair that –fuck– it smells nice. Sirius stifles a laugh beside him and just for that he wraps his arms around her waist, pulling her close and placing a wet kiss just above her jaw. She buries a hand in his golden strands and brushes her lips softly with his “Pay attention ragazzone” big guy she smiles at Emmeline with her hand still buried in his hair, massaging his scalp. He knows it should bother him, her sharp, potentially dangerous claws near him, but he melts into the touch, it feels too good, soothing, relaxing.
“Okay” Emmeline falters for a bit before Ursa nods at her in encouragement to go on with her explanation on how to conjure a bouquet “well, the incantation is orchideous”
“Orchideous?”
“Yeah, that’s right”
“Say it” Ursa turns to Peter
“Orchidea” he nods and she giggles, sweet and innocent as an actual orchidea
“Orchideous” Emmeline corrects him, sliding on her chair closer to his face.
“Orchidius”
“Not quite” Emmeline pulls her chair closer to him. Ursa stares at her, her knee pressing against his. “listen carefully,” It’s an effort not to roll her eyes at her, is she really that stupid? Ursa grabs his face and turns it to hers instead
“Mon coeur, look at my lips,” she brushes his own with her thumb and his gaze flickers down to her mouth almost instantly “or-KID-ee-us. Orchideous” he nods, compelled and entranced by her very kissable lips. Have they always been this kissable? “Now say it”
“What?” He want to lick them, he licks his own instead
“Say Orchideous bonito” she smiles down at him and on autopilot he does “Good”
“Great.” Emmeline says awkwardly, sliding back into her seat “Now, the wand work is a bit hard—” Ursa gives his hair a small tug, when their eyes meet her gaze flickers down and he stifles a laugh as she smirks
“Sorry” when he can’t hold it in anymore he drowns it in her shoulder “I’m sorry” Emmeline seems lost as to what is funny
“Sorry, you were saying about the hard wand work?” she says with a totally sober expression and he snorts into her neck, she lets out a little chuckle of her own “Pay attention amore. Sorry, we’re listening” she frowns at them, staring with a lost, evaluating look from one to the other before she continues her explanation
“It’s like this” she shows them the motion and Ursa makes her repeat it another dozen times
“Doll” Peter nudges her and Ursa finally lays off the other girl in exchange for her wand
“Why don’t you try it Peter?” Emmeline offers him a smile
“Orchideous” nothing happens “Orchideous. Orchideous. Orchideous. It isn’t working. You try it” he nudges Ursa and she nails it on the first try. A pink light bursts from her wand and blue orchids bloom to life in a humongous purple bouquet with ribbon and all
“It matches your eyes” he stares at the beautiful bouquet remembering the night she conjured her own flower wandless. She told him he’d impressed her and for whatever reason, he wants to do it again. He plucks a flower off and tucks it behind her ear
“Gorgeous” he whispers, staring at the tiny baby blue sparkle in her dark gray eyes, he can’t deny they’re beautiful, a beautiful, alluring, endless pit ready to swallow you whole, chew you out and not even bothering to spit you out because they don’t care enough to do so, you’re just that insignificant to them.
“Try it again,” She tucks his hair behind his ear and frames it with a flower, blue and striking “You've already impressed me bonito” there it is again, the unspoken stop trying to impress people. It worked the other time, he might as well try it again. He holds up his wand “can you do it again?” his arm freezes in the air and he stares at her “impress me darling” it’s a challenge sparkling in her eyes. He sets his jaw and focuses on wanting to give the most beautiful girl he’s ever seen the most beautiful flowers he’s ever seen. So what if there’s a momentary glitch and he pictures Ursa as that girl? She’s objectively the most beautiful girl in school, at least looks-wise
“Orchideous” pink pours out of his wand and fills her lap with white orchids with a gray center chore and white petals wrapped in silver paper
“You did it!” She beams at him and he beams at himself.
“They look like her eyes” Emmeline tells him, she’s staring at them fondly, something like resignation or acceptance clouding her eyes. Peter stares at the flowers, the charcoal gray has tiny specks of silver and richer blues. It looks like an iris. It looks like the irises smiling down at him. Ursa cups his face and pecks the tip of his nose and he tilts his head up capturing her in a kiss
“Pete, it’s great that you managed the spell, but we’re in a library and that’s my little baby sister” Sirius glares at him
“Right, sorry, forgot you were there” his eyes never lose sight of the glittering sparkle in Ursa’s eyes, he needs to know how she does it, he needs to draw it
“Pettigrew!” Sirius hisses and snaps him out of his haze with a shove
“Stop being annoying Sirius, we’re busy” she swats her brother’s hand away
“We’re in the library! You’re supposed to be studying!”
“That’s what we’re doing,” she tells him after a fleeting kiss and redirecting Peter to her neck “we’re learning how to conjure a bouquet”
“He’s not doing much learning by sucking on your neck!”
“Positive reinforcement” she shrugs
“YOU—”
“Keep your voice down, we’re in a library” Peter hushes him and Sirius’ face turns red but Peter can’t bother to care when Ursa bops his chin up to kiss him
“Mooooony,” Sirius whines “make them stooop”
“Can you two stop sucking face please?” he pinches the bridge of his nose “Pete, did you finish your DA homework?”
“It’s due next week” he brushes him off, not tearing himself away from Ursa for more than a second
“Why don’t you start it now?”
“I should get going anyways, I’ll see you tomorrow, amore” she kisses his pout and leaves him with a smile
“Pete, remember that thing we talked about the other night?” Peter frowns but then he remembers, the night he asked Remus if he’d ever wanked to the thought of Ursa, he nods, Remus told him it was just hormones “Yeah, you’re fucked” he says and Peter sighs
“I know”
Seein' you tonight
It's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight
It's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight
It's a bad idea, right?
Seein' you tonight
Fuck it, it's fine
Later in their room Peter has to pay the consequences of his own actions, even if he was being guided by hormones rather than his mind at the time. Probably because he was being guided by hormones rather than his mind at the time. "I don't like you hanging out with Ursa all— chammy and friendly and— and— tonguey" Sirius tells Peter with a wrinkle between his brows
"Tonguey?"
"You know what I mean!"
"Thankfully, I don't"
"Are you really going to sit there and pretend you don't enjoy ‘spending time with her’ now that your ‘time with her’ consists on you defiling her?"
"Defiling seems a bit much, don't you think?" James lends Peter a helping hand
"Right. Defiling's what James does to Regulus every night" Peter hums knowing it’s an evil move but he’s desperate enough to make it. He throws James under the bus to save his own skin, is he proud? No. Would he do it again? Probably.
"And day" James beams proudly and Sirius curses his own existence. Peter would definitely like to do that again.
"James!" He groans, why does his best friend have to be so honest and open about everything?
“Sirius, I don’t think there’s anything left in either of your siblings to defile” Remus comes to the rescue "if anything, I'm pretty sure it'd be them doing the defiling"
“But it’s disgusting! They’re babies!”
“They’re not even a full year younger than I am and we both know you certainly don’t see me as a baby”
“You don’t understand! None of you has any siblings” Sirius grumbles and they all turn to Peter who very much does have siblings, and a much normal relationship with them for that matter, but that’s irrelevant right now
“If it makes you feel better, I’m still very much afraid of her?” he offers and Sirius sniffs
“Yeah, it does a little bit”
“There’s no point in having him pretend he doesn’t enjoy making out with her or doesn’t finds her insanely hot, we just need to make sure he doesn’t fall in love with her”
“Insanely hot?!” Sirius spurts
“She’s the girl version of you, sweetheart”
“Oh, right answer” James nods, looking impressed at Remus
“And I’m not anywhere near in danger of falling in love with her. By the way, did your sister ever put your grandfather’s fake severed head in your mother’s bed with a bunch of fake blood?”
“Oh, I’d forgotten about that!” he chuckles, his face lighting up at the memory “That’s the only time I ever saw my mother show any emotion, Regulus swears she almostcried, but I don't believe him”
“Oh, I shouldn’t have asked. I don’t know why I did”
“You weren’t there, it was hilarious. She actually reused that one, she put it on Uncle Aphald’s plate at dinner. Actually, now that I think about it, that was the last time we saw him, he stopped coming ‘round after that” it’s one of those instances Sirius says something he deems entirely normal or even funny only to be met with looks of pity and concern by his friends "we write to each other sometimes though"
“Sweetheart,” Remus pulls him into his arms and kisses his forehead, this is a significant improvement on how these moments usually go. Sirius doesn’t really mind this moments anymore if this is the new outcome
“Wanna make me feel better over my crappy, shitty childhood?” his hands slide down and he squeezes his bum
"I think that's our cue to leave"
"Yeap" Sirius pops the p
My brain goes, "Ah"
Can't hear my thoughts (I cannot hear my thoughts)
Like blah-blah-blah (blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah)
Should probably
(I should probably, probably not)
(I should probably, probably not)
Peter’s not quite sure how it happens, just that it does. Somehow. He ends up on a double date with Charles Greengrass and Emma Vanity. Both slytherins, both surprisingly agreeable. They make the expected sneers at his ‘Gryffindor affliction’, but none are made with malice. Most surprising of all, apparently he doesn’t mind the date in the slightest. In fact, he’d never admit it, but he kind of enjoys it. He especially enjoys the part where they’re done with their picnic (even though Ursa only ate the cake she brought and spent most of the time feeding Peter in the tiniest bites possible while they chat about life and people and— fine, they gossip, they spent the entire afternoon gossipping. It turns out when you’re popular and have lots of ‘friends’ you gather a lot of intel. That’s probably why Ursa has so many ‘friends’). They move on to the snogging and as much as he’s a sucker for fresh, hot gossip, he prefers this. He’s a fan of snogging. A huge fan. Especially with Ursa— because she’s beautiful, not as a person. He likes her as an object. That sounds worse. He’s just a teenager and teenagers like kissing beautiful girls who smile down at him and take action so his brain turns off and he finally stops overthinking every tiny little thing. She’s the one that guides his hands to the hem of her shirt and his hands are the ones that slowly snake up.
Not that he’ll ever tell Sirius about any of this. He happens to enjoy his head attached to his body.
Emma tosses the fourth twig out of the way just as a rock sticks onto her back “Alright that’s enough, I’m done!” she sits up straight and Charles groans
“We could take this up to my room”
“I’m not gonna sleep with you” Emma crosses her arms in front of her chest
“You don’t have to, we can just hang out for a bit”
“‘Hang out’ is code for sex”
“Think I’ve been doing it wrong my whole life then” Peter chimes and Emma glares at him
“Peter and Ursa can come too, right mate?” he elbows Peter and he knows he’s appealing to male solidarity but he doesn’t really care, he just wants to make out with a pretty girl, he blames his teenage hormones.
“Sure”
“Oh, we will?” Ursa cocks a brow at him and his eyes go wide with fright
“no— I—” he feels his cheeks go pink but then she’s laughing, she falls onto him like he put that smile on her face and he finds himself smiling back
“It’s okay baby, we can go make out on Charly’s comfy bed” she pats his shoulder and he tugs on her hand, she falls on top of him laughing. He feels the rise and fall of her chest against him and her eyes don’t leave his. They’re charged with something electric, that shimmering sparkle that always drives him insane is there
“I need to draw you” he admits aloud for the first time in a whisper, he brushes her cheek with his thumb and she smiles so bright it’s blinding. It’s like a current, it pulls him in and he’s useless to it, why fight it when you know you’re gonna lose either way? He lets go of his struggle and just tilts forwards. It’s so easy. It’s so complicated. It’s so—
“Okay, you saps, let's go” Charles yanks them up.
On the way over to the dungeons Charles mumbles to him “you’re making me look bad. Why’re you still trying to impress her? She’s already yours”
“I don’t think she could ever belong to anyone but herself”
“Oh shut up,” he rolls his eyes “she can’t hear you anymore” before Peter can say anything in response, Ursa hops onto his back and kisses his cheek. An instant later he doesn’t know how he knows but he’s certain Ursa put a silencing spell around them. It’s weird, different, because he can hear Charles and Emma talking, but he somehow knows they won’t hear him
“Don’t hold back” she whispers, hidden behind a kiss
“What?”
“Right now. I’ll tell you when to stop”
He’s nothing if not obedient. He meets their next corner and spins her round from his back to his front. He presses her against the wall and snoggs the daylights out of her. He licks into her mouth and slides his hands down to her rump, grabbing and squeezing and feeling and it’s wrong how good she feels, how right she tastes.
Nails dig into his arm, it means stop. He’s already pulling away but it’s too late
“What the fuck?! My eyes! Oh Merlin! My eyes! I am blind!” Sirius wails dramatically and Peter sets Ursa back down gently
“You’re so dramatic” Ursa rolls her eyes at him “Don’t worry, we were just on our way to Charly’s room, you won’t have to witness—”
“What?! No, the hell you’re not! You are a child, you’re not going to have an orgy!”
“Who’s having an orgy?” Remus rounds the same corner Sirius came from chewing on a chocolate bar
“We’re not having an orgy” Peter says at the same time as Sirius points at them
“You’re so embarrassing” Ursa hisses, yanking him away from prying eyes and into an empty classroom. Once the silencing spell is up, she adds “and predictable” she winks at him with her signature smirk “Thanks baby bro” she’s headed the other exit but he yanks her back
“I told you not to call me that” he full on whines
“Cry baby” she taunts and he’s ready to fight and argue when Peter and Remus squeak their shoes over to them
“Shit, are you okay? Did I go overboard?” Peter pants, his lips are red and swollen, his golden hair’s still a mess from where she ran her fingers through it
“You did what I told you to”
“Well yeah but—”
“But nothing. You did good”
“Yeah?” Why does he sound so breathless when he says it?
“Yeah,” she tells him with a gentle smile, one he’s kissed before, one he’ll kiss again and –fuck– one he wants to kiss right now “I look forwards to my drawing” she leaves them with a flip of her long black hair
Sirius turns to him and crosses his arms in front of his chest. Peter flees the same way she did “Pettigrew!” Sirius chases after him and Remus follows with a sigh.
Peter has been blessed by an angel and has luck on his side, that’s why James comes over to distract Sirius with an idea on how to get back at Snape before the brunet catches him.
Oh, yes, I know that he's my ex
But can't two people reconnect?
I only see him as a friend
I just tripped and fell into his bed
Evan walks into his empty room, only it isn’t empty “Heard you’ve been crying over me” he drops his books and raises his wand, startled by the sudden voice propped in his desk, legs dangling over the edge. He lowers it at the sight of that cocky smirk he knows well. His lips tighten into a thin line “Honestly, it’s a bit pathetic, don’t you think?”
“You sound just like your mother,” he says and she smiles. She hops off the desk and turns her back to him. She goes through his drawers with purpose
“She’s been known to have a few momentary glimpses of intelligence amidst her retched, vile insanity” she hums, finally finding what she was looking for. She smiles a feline grin as she pulls out the cigar box.
“Why are you here?” She offers one of his own cigars to him, so generous. He shakes his head.
“I’ve told you before,” She lights a cigar up for herself and stares into his eyes “you’re pretty when you cry”
“And I’ve told you before, I can tell when you lie” he snatches the cigar off her fingers and pulls it to his own lips. He throws himself on the bed “Let me rephrase my question. What’s your excuse for being here? We both know why you’re really here”
“Because I love you” she breaks down with tears in her eyes, the snap of a switch but careful to still wobble on the believable side of the line, no tears drop “and you’ll never love me the way I want you to. I’m trying so hard, I even started dating Peter, and he’s brilliant and beautiful, but he’s not you” her voice breaks and her throat wobbles as she swallows down “I need to get you out of my head, please, I need to forget about you” she begs and he rises from the bed. He cups her face into his hands with earnest, cigar tucked between his fingers, he peers into the storm in her eyes, a fucking hurricane brought to life. He swipes his thumb over a lonely, silent tear that escapes her long, curled lashes.
“Ursa,” he whispers her name like it’s a secret, staring steady into her weepy eyes and smiles sadly “I told you,” he rests his forehead on hers and lets his eyes flutter shut “I can tell when you’re lying” he murmurs and she yanks herself away from him, the sorrow in her face instantly taken up by exasperation
“I hate you” she grumbles and he smirks
“Liar”
“You’re obnoxious”
“Right back at you”
She glowers at him but there's something soft buried beneath it, she allows that softness to take over her face "just do this for me, okay? Please, just this once, let it go"
"I can't"
"Why can't you just do this one thing for me?!" she rages
"Because I love you" he says resolutely and she groans, she growls and she sulks. She snatches the cigar off his hand and slumps on his bed as she takes a long puff, letting the harmful air fill her lungs "you don't have to tell me the truth, even if I'm dying to know what's going on, but stop ignoring me" he leans against the poster of his bed and holds his hand out, she hands him the cigar with a scowl "I miss you" he says through a cloud of smoke
"Don't be sappy"
"I can be mean," he offers her stubborn, proud mind “if you want,” he nudges her “I can threaten you” he smiles at her “I learned from the best” finally, she meets his eyes and smiles "I'll send my father to hell and publicly denounce my support for Dumblewart if you’re not my friend again"
"If Crouch asks, I vanished your bits like I did his" she sighs on her way to the door
"You did what?!" She shuts the door on his questions and she smiles.
Now I'm gettin' in the car, wreckin' all my plans
I know I should stop
But I can't
And I told my friends I was asleep
But I never said where or in whose sheets
And I pull up to your place, on the second floor
And you're standin', smiling at the door
And I'm sure I've seen much hotter men
But I really can't remember when