Midnights
I feel stunning
And entrancing
Feel like running
And dancing for joy
For I'm loved
By a pretty wonderful boy
“What the hell is this?” Ursa kicks the bag laying on the grass in the backyard
“Aren’t you always going on about how smart you are, sleeping bag and a tent, what does it look like, genius?” Sirius smirks up at her looking smug “James and I are sleeping under the stars tonight” if they figure out how to set it up. It’s harder than it looks. He wishes Remus were here, he’d know how to do it.
“I thought James did that every night” she smirks and Sirius frowns at her. She rolls her eyes at him, it’s not fun to tease him if he’s too thick to understand it “sleeping under Regulus… the Leo star?”
“Yeah, I understood that terrible joke the first time,” he replies with a wrinkle of disgust
“Did it gross you out?”
“Yeah?”
“Then it served its purpose” she shrugs
“What I don’t understand— Doesn’t that gross you out too even a little bit? He’s your brother too”
“Well I’m not the one fucking him. Plus, I’d rather walk in on them 69ing than having to hear him call James the fucking sun again”
“You make my brain hurt with ugly pictures”
“Maybe it means it’s finally growing!”
“Fuck you. I’m not dumb, you arsehole, stop acting like I am”
“You don’t have to be dumb in order to be the dummy of the family. Even though you totally are” she hums and pinches his cheek, he swats her hand away “don’t worry though, you’re probably smarter than most of your friends”
“Pleaaase,” Sirius huffs but there’s no bite to their words, more like simply family taunting each other. Almost like regular siblings “I’m ten times smarter than you”
“Aw, you really believe that” she says it like taking pity on a child who’s too innocent to know better. In this case, too thick
“Being a crazy psychotic bitch doesn’t mean you’re smart, you know”
“No. But you gotta admit, it does make me interesting”
“In that case you and Bella make for a fascinating pair” he teases, her jaw twitches, her smile grows wider
“Well, you would know, you might just be the only person she hates more than me” her words sound light but every letter weighs a ton.
“What are you talking about?” he chuckles “She adores you” he’s dumber than she thought. He really wasn’t paying attention. No one ever is. She wonders what that’s like, blissfully unaware.
“Well, who wouldn’t adore moi?” she smirks at him and he rolls his eyes
“I don’t even remotely like you”
“ugh, you’re against murder” she waves him off, discarding his opinion as irrelevant for the sole fact that he’s… not pro-murder?
“Who have you murdered?” he sighs, she’s such a poser, even if he doesn’t put it past her to actually do it, she’s usually more sinister barks rather than bites. Okay, maybe bites to the mind, but she’s not actually ever bodily harmed him. Well no, that’s a lie, she’s literally tortured him until he was too weak to even stand. She’s definitely capable of murder, there’s not a doubt in his mind about that. Maybe he shouldn’t have asked that. He isn’t sure he wants to know the answer.
“Nobody yet” she tilts her head to the side and he’s not sure he believes her. Would she tell him if she had? Would he do something if she did? He doesn’t think he wants to find out “but I’m still young and people piss me off a lot, so that’s bound to go up eventually” he’s 90% certain she’s joking but he definitely doesn’t want to wonder about that other 10%.
Make it 80-20.
“What are you two talking about?” James jogs up to him jolly. A little too happy. His zipper’s down. Regulus trails just behind him. Great. Sirius looks at Ursa and she smirks
“Murder” she replies nonchalant. James eyes go wide and his smile droops.
“Uh… good?” James stutters and Sirius smirks at her proudly, biting down on a small laugh “so long as you’re getting along”
“Will you still say that when we’re disposing of your body?” she cocks a brow at him and he pales.
“Uh… probably, yeah” James nods with a frown like he’s genuinely thinking about that and that’s certainly what his reaction would be “though I probably wouldn’t be able to talk if I were dead, but I guess I’d probably be looking down from heaven in approval”
“He actually means it” Regulus sighs like he’s both enamored and exhausted by James’ fierce loyalty and kindness to his friends. The three of them chuckle and Ursa smirks.
“Have fun sleeping on the cold hard floor”
“You could stay with us, it’ll be fun!” James’ beam pops back onto his face, it’s just as persistent as he is
“Now that sounds like something that would make my number go up”
“What number?” he frowns at her
“Trust me, you don’t want to know” Sirius pats his arm “goodnight Ursa”
“Whenever you’re not around” she waves back
It must be the heat
Or some rare disease
Or too much to eat
Or maybe it's fleas
“Do you not like it priy? I could make you something else if you don’t like it” Euphie kindly offers Ursa on the dinner table, she’s barely taken a bite. Actually, she hasn’t taken a
single bite at all. They’d bought food ‘so you won't have to bother cooking tonight. We thought we might give you a break, we can't keep taking advantage of your brilliant cooking skills’ ugh. Ursa hates their incessant attempts at niceness and making her feel cared for. It makes her want to hurl and slam the door on their faces, always doing so much— too much. She much rather they keep on allowing her to be in charge of every meal, in control, decide what they get to eat every day, every meal.
Still, Ursa keeps a friendly grin on her face and pretends to appreciate them the way they’re so transparently desperate for. She wonders if the reek of desperation inside this house is too great for Lupin’s heightened sense of smell and that’s why he’d been avoiding it. She waits for Monty’s Hindi translation before she replies
“Of course not, I’m sorry, it’s delicious. I just made the mistake of eating too much earlier”
“You don’t need to apologize, that’s what food is for” Monty assures her easily
“When did you eat? I didn’t see you— ouch” Regulus cuts Sirius off with a kick under the table and Ursa wishes she’d been the one to inflict that pain “what did you do that for?” he rubs his shin.
“Sorry,” Regulus grins an awkward smile at everyone when they turn to look at him “leg spasm” he lies and Ursa smiles at him, that’s why he’s her favorite brother by so far it’s not even a competition.
“Where’s it from? I’d never tried it before” Ursa deflects from her siblings and Euphemia goes on a tangent about this little corner in Diagon Alley Monty took her for their first date. An absolute, horrid mess, that was, but even with a pain for a first date they’d made it to happily ever after. It drips in just as much corniness as James' entire existence. Ursa would rather stab her hand with a fork than keep listening but she keeps the smile plastered on her face and pretends to care, politely nodding along to their story
Sirius keeps glaring questioning looks at Regulus who keeps pointedly ignoring him “arrête d'être grossier” stop being rude she hisses to her least favorite sibling and turns to Monty with a beam “So you are the one that installed on James his hopeless, persevering belief in true love?”
“Guilty” he flashes his son a proud glance and then at Regulus “I’m glad he’s found his Euphie. I hope you find your Monty soon”
“I hope he’s rich” she admits and they chuckle. At least that part isn’t a lie. Except perhaps for the insinuation that such a person exists. Ursa’s one true love is herself, no one else can even begin to compare.
That the city should give me its key
A committee
Should be organized to honour me
I feel dizzy
I feel sunny
I feel fizzy and funny and fine
And so pretty
Miss America can just resign
There’s a raging storm outside and Ursa doesn’t argue when Sirius crawls into his own warm and cozy bed. She’s pointedly ignoring him. Or maybe not. She never truly talks to him, but she hasn’t looked at him since dinner. Not that she usually looks at him. Sirius is going to lose the fumbling grasp he holds on his own sanity.
“Why didn’t you eat?” He asks some time later into the darkness of the night when he can no longer hold it in.
“I saw your face and suddenly wasn’t hungry anymore” she answers with a roll of her eyes. He’s like a dog with a bone, and can never let anything go. He kicks her under the covers but then he stills, hesitant with his next words
“You weren’t— You don’t— Should I be worried?” he has the nerve to sound concern
“Look at you, trying not to be your usual brute, untactful self”
“Ursa,” he huffs in a whisper and she rolls her eyes “should I?”
“Honestly, you never cared before, so don’t start now” she turns her back to him. End of conversation. Unfortunately, he’s slow on the uptake.
“I’ve always cared” he says softly, barely a whisper, she almost doesn’t hear him.
“Then stop” that does put an end to the conversation, Sirius falls quiet.
It takes Sirius hours before he manages to fall asleep. When he has a nightmare that night, she’s in it, not as a tormentor but calling for him. When he wakes up, damp from sweat and screaming, she, lovely as always, kicks him off the bed and onto the cold, hard ground.
See the pretty girl in that mirror there
(What mirror, where?)
Who can that attractive girl be?
(Which, what, where, whom?)
Ursa truly wasn’t lying when she said she was bored. Unfortunately for Peter, two weeks before school starts, Ursa declares he’ll have to get used to her flirting if they’ll be pretending to be a couple anytime soon, she doubts the blond’s acting skills and with good reason if he’s being fair
“You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” Ursa tells the mirror. Of course she’s in love with herself, Peter thinks to herself, she’s Sirius Black’s sister “But of course, you’re not bad to look at either” She turns to look at Peter and bites her lip, running her eyes up and down his body.
“Stop staring at me like that” he snaps at her. Her stare makes him feel naked even while fully clothed and the size of an ant while simultaneously the size of an elephant.
“Like what?” she flutters her lashes at him with an innocent smile
“You know how”
“Like I wanna see you naked?” Peter chokes. A cat-like grin spreads on her lips and confirms what he already knows, she’s just messing with him and she would never look at him like that.
“Will you leave me alone?” but his voice sounds weak and strained even to his own ears.
“Ask me nicely and I’ll think about it” she slips closer to him, she scatters tingles along his arm with a brush of her fingers
“Please” Ursa closes her eyes to the sound like it’s the sweetest thing she’s ever heard
“Say that again” she brushes his blond hair out of the way, he hasn’t bother cutting it in the entire summer and it’s starting to look a bit shaggy
“Fuck you” he slaps her hand away, that spreads her lips up into a blooming smile
“That’s the idea” she purrs. His cheeks burn but he glares at her, Ursa finds this hilarious. He’s given her the exact reaction she was looking for and hates himself for it, why did she have to look so good though? He might be able to stop his body from reacting if she didn’t look like that “Oh, come on darling, are you really gonna tell me you haven’t at least thought about it?”
“Only as something that would highly repulse me” he bites back, they both know that’s an out-right lie
“Hmmm, okay” she turns away with a smile “can you hand me that shirt please?” he rolls his eyes, Ursa is much closer to it than him, but he reaches for it to get rid of her faster. He holds it out in his hand for her to take. Ursa stares at him as she slips her shirt over her head and tosses it to the side, her charcoal eyes never leave Peter’s baby-blue ones. It takes all his will power not to do exactly what she wants him to do and dip his eyes lower, take a peek down at her extremely fit-looking body but, much to Ursa’s disappointment, he somehow manages “Thanks” she breathes and takes the shirt off his hands
“For fuck’s sakes! At least shut the fucking door!” Sirius slams the door shut
“You’re cute when you’re on your big brother mode” Remus taunts him and a soft rose blush flushes on his cheeks once he realizes he just called Sirius cute. But of course Sirius’ mind soars right past it, completely oblivious.
“I’m more worried about Peter than her at this point” the door swings back open and Ursa gives them a once over
“You’re a horrible brother, you know that?”
“Says the one that used cruciatus on both her siblings”
“Only puts her one above you” Regulus reminds him from James’ door
“He’s just jealous he’s everyone’s least favorite sibling. And child.”
“Fuck you!” Sirius balls his fists, too easy to rial up
“That last part is probably a compliment” Remus whispers to him and he simmers down
“Don’t calm him down,” Ursa crosses her arms over her chest like sulky, pouty child having a tantrum “I’m bored”
“You were actively trying to piss me off?!”
“There’s nothing else to do here” she throws her hands in the air. Regulus draws in a breath with a grimace
“What’s wrong?” James comes and wraps his arms around his boyfriend, noticing the look on his face.
“Please don’t start messing with people’s heads” he begs her
“Like I said, I’m bored,” a cat-like smirk spreads across her face “and I’ve already figure out what makes all of you tic”
“Oh, you have, haven’t you?” James scoffs but Regulus shoots him a warning look. He knows she has.
“Look, Sirius and I are used to you, okay? You can mess with us, but please leave the rest out of it” Regulus says, such a bore. But alright, if Sirius is within limits… She turns to Remus with an amused smirk
“Don’t you fucking dare” Sirius pushes Remus away from her and steps between them, ever the valiant knight
“Oh, Relax. He’s already sad and depressed on his own, messing with his head would be making him believe he’s actually worthy of love and attention” Remus simply shrugs in agreement
“Moony!” Sirius cries out
“really Sirius, you’re doing a horrible job as a friend, I wouldn’t be surprised if he changes his mind and dumps you this year again”
“Shut the fuck up!” he clenches his fists
“Seriously Sirius? Fifteen years and you still fall that easily?” Regulus raises a brow at him
“Oh, you’re so easy” she pats his cheek adoringly. Sirius shakes her off and she just laughs.
“That’s not fair! She never messes with you!”
“Because I’m not an impulsive idiot” Regulus boredly observes and Ursa leans back against the wall enjoying the show
“Plus, he happens to have a functioning brain”
“Fuck off, you think you’re so much better than—"
“I think that settles it, no party this year” James sentences. His pea-sized brain appears to have somehow shrunk. It’s a wonder how he manages to breathe all on his own “we’ll all end up fighting if she comes”
“You dim-witted poodle” Ursa sighs
“Ursa!” Regulus hisses
“You said not to call him a simple minded baboon. Besides, you keep saying my name like that but I think it’s time you realize it has absolutely zero effect on me whatsoever” she points out and Regulus sighs “What your mentally-challenged sex-pet hasn’t realized yet, is that you take me out to a party I’ll have to play nice to keep up the charming cover Bald-Voldie’s got me under. I’m supposed to be making him fall in love with me, remember?” she bops Peter’s chin and he shoves her away like a slimy bug
“And why would you tell us that? What are you planning?” Sirius crosses his arms over his chest
“Haven’t you been listening?” she knocks on his head but it’s hollow, no brain to be found “I’m bored. Plus, I’m interested to see him act like he’s into me” she smirks at Peter who pales at her words “you’ll have to do it in front of the entire school soon, so you better get used to it” she winks at him, delighting in the way her words bring him visible discomfort “When’s the party?”
“The week before school starts, but I’m not sure—”
“—that your opinion matters? I agree Jamie, it doesn’t” she bops his nose with a smile
“Why are you so mean?” he wines
“Do you only like it when Reggie does it?” she smirks at him
“Yes— but that’s not my point.” She flashes him an amused smile at his admission and so she grants him an answer
“It’s fun”
“Only because you’re deranged” Sirius says
“Perhaps” she muses with a careless shrug. The prospect of being deranged doesn’t sway her much. Probably because she’s used to it, most people in their family are.
I feel pretty
Oh so pretty
I feel pretty and witty and gay
And I pity
Any girl who isn't me today
I feel charming
Oh so charming
It's alarming how charming I feel
And so pretty
That I hardly can believe I'm real
“Peter come on, let me do your makeup, just a little bit of eyeliner”
“Yeah, come on Peter, I’ll look silly if I’m the only one wearing it” James chimes under Sirius’ inexpert hand on the carpeted floor of his room
“Stop moving” he swats him on the side
“Sorry” he sits as still as possible, not even blinking
There’s a knock on the door and Ursa actually waits to be allowed inside before she saunters in. It must be a miracle. Maybe she really will be behaving nicely tonight “Hey, Sirius, you got any makeup? James’ mum doesn’t believe in expiration dates and I’m pretty sure her makeup is older than we are” James’ room is painted a Gryffindor scarlet, Quidditch and band posters crowd the walls. How boringly predictable. A clear reflection of the extra space inside his head. That’s who both her siblings fell for. Shameful
“Ooh! Are you still good at doing nails?” Sirius twirls to her excited and James smacks him on the side of the face when he almost takes his eyeball in the process
“Better” she smirks at him
“Can you do my nails?!” he chimes excited
“Sirius, I just did your nails” Peter glares at him, he’s just painted a plain black coat onto them, he put his best effort into that
“Sure. Want me to do yours too? I bet something blueish would really make your eyes pop”
“I’m good” Peter says sprawled on the bed
“What about you? A snitch”
“Fuck yeah that sounds cool!” Actually, she thinks that sounds plain, boring and predictable. So perfect for James.
“Sirius, don’t you have anything besides eyeliner and nail polish?”
“I have liquid eyeliner” he defends
“I see that, you’re about to turn Potter into a pirate with it. I need to take you shopping, you don’t even have mascara”
“Pirates are cool”
“But I’m cooler and you look like a raccoon. Move” she swats him away and with a scowl he relents his hold on the liner. With a simple spell she clears away all the makeup on his brown face “Pencil liner please” she holds her hand out.
“So bossy” Sirius rolls his eyes but places it into her hand. With another quick spell it changes from black to red.
“I said please” she cups James’ face with the hem of her fingers, a touch so soft and gentle it takes him by surprise. She traces the pencil along his lid and smudges it out with her fingers. She spells the pencil back to black and draws a thinner line that she smokes out, melting into the red “Now hold still” she points her wand at him and he goes crossed eye
“uhm,” before he can argue against it, the spell is casted and his lashes are long and full.
“Sirius, your turn” she uses the liquid liner for her brother, all sharp, clear lines with a thicker lower line that brings the attention to his stare rather than his eyes and she does it swiftly, quickly, with trained ease of expert hands.
“I look beautiful!” James beams at himself in the mirror
“Smoking” Peter winks at him through the full length mirror
“Regulus will surely think so” Ursa says instead of denying it and James doesn’t even hide his joy.
She hands Sirius the cotton and acetone on the ground. He looks down at his hands as he dabs the cotton along his nails “You’re supposed to give the product time to work” she takes the cotton off his hands with a gentleness he forgot she was capable of. She holds the cotton on his nail for a few seconds before wiping it off, it comes off a lot easier
“This feels weird” Sirius’ eyes flicker from their hands to her eyes “you doing my nails again” she smiles softly and nods “remember the first time you did my nails?”
“Yeah, the phases of the moon, really?”
“It’s the first thing that popped into my head!”
“Idiot” she shakes her head fondly
“Oh, and then dad caught us and you told him you needed to practice so you could look your best at some piano concert or something, you were brilliant, you little manipulative psycho, he even started comforting you—Ouch!”
“Sorry” the gentleness of her touch returns and her eyes remain glued to his nails “What do you want?”
“Bowie” he doesn’t even hesitate.
“Anything in particular?” she asks and Sirius shrugs.
Twenty minutes later Ursa puts the finishing clear coat on Sirius’ nails. He has Bowie’s face painted on each thumb, one with the electric-sky-blue eyeshadow and the other with Aladdin Sane legendary look. A black Bowie on his right ring finger’s nail and a red one on the left index, David on the middle finger with the respective colours, one index nail had a star and the other ring finger a man, the little fingers showed off the iconic flash.
“Don’t touch anything or I will tell Binley” she warns him and he chuckles, that’s the same thing she told him that first time she did his nails, only Kreacher instead of Binley.
“I swear on Kreacher’s life” he says the same way he had back then. He’d never understood why she and Regulus care so much about the mean, bloodpurist house elf. Although he seemed to reserve all his vileness for the older black, never to the twins, a recurring thing in his family
“My turn!” James says, allowing his usual excitement and enthusiasm to shine through in the presence of Ursa for the first time without fear. She takes his hand silently and sets to work without raining on his parade. She switches the clear polish to black and sets to work.
James ends up with a Quaffle in a finger, a snitch on another, a bludger on a third, another one bears their bats, another a broom, other the hoops, the cup on another, his shirt’s number (four) on the last and a constellation on each thumb “I don’t get the stars” James frowns at them after he’s proclaimed his mad, vast love for them
“It’s the Leo and the Canis Major constellations”
“Regulus and Sirius’ constellations” James gapes, he stares in awe at his thumbs with an idiotic smile traced upon his lips
“Thought it was time they were over your thumb instead of constantly under it” the corner of her lip twitches and Sirius flips her off
“You have to admit she isn’t lying”
“Fuck you Pettigrew, James is under my thumb!”
“Hell, yeah I am!” James cheers because he’s entirely a jock “I’m gonna show Reg my nails!” he soars out the door
“Do you really think blue would make my nails pop?” Peter asks sheepishly after a beat of silence where Ursa lined her own eyes.
“Yeah, obviously not as much as makeup would, but your eyes are gorgeous, they don’t need much to stand out” his cheeks glow red and Sirius turns his back on them to roll his eyes. She’s such an insufferable kiss-arse. Even if Pete’s eyes are objectively gorgeous.
“Okay. You can do my makeup if you’d like” Peter mumbles to the ground and Ursa beams at him so brightly, it always wanders Sirius how she can be that great of an actress. It always lightens a sparkle of hope that maybe she isn’t…
Keep away from her
Send for Chino
This is not the Maria we know
Modest and pure
Polite and refined
Well-bred and mature
And out of her mind!