In 1979, Regulus Black sent his beloved house elf to the Dark Lord.
Soon after, Kreacher came back to Regulus, nearly dead and babbling nonsense.
This led to Regulus Black finding out a large secret, one that would bring on his premature death.
…
After months of planning, Regulus Black was nearly ready.
There were only two things that Regulus had left to do before he ventured to the cave and doesn’t return.
In a locked box were several letters, addressed to varying people. He places the box under a loose floorboard in his bedroom, not intending to send the letters but instead leaving them to be found years after his death.
He smiled at Kreacher sadly, repeating his instructions. At midnight, Kreacher would pick him up at a designated destination.
Before Regulus left Grimmauld Place 12, he stopped by his estranged brother's room one last time, picking up a ring that Sirius had once worn but forgot in his rushed packing the night he left.
Regulus slid the ring onto his finger before he apparated away.
…
He appeared near a familiar cemetery.
Currently, there were only two other people there, both muggles visiting a loved one.
Regulus had a hood on, his face mostly covered as he walked through the cemetery, finally stopping in front of a specific grave.
Louis John Carter
July 1st, 1961-November 22nd, 1978
A loved son, friend and partner
May he rest in Peace.
Checking that he wasn’t seen, Regulus conjured up several flowers. It had been Louis’ favourite spell.
Regulus knelt in front of the grave, placing the flowers down and resting a hand on the hedge stone.
“Sorry I haven’t visited in a while, my love,” He murmurs softly, “But I’m going to do the right thing, okay? And… and I’ll see you soon.”
…
Out of blatant curiosity, Regulus stepped into a muggle bookshop.
Regulus looked around, noting nothing special and yet… It seemed to be quite lovely.
He walked past book shelves, scanning titles and authors, recognising none, though that was no surprise.
With hesitation, he reached for a book, just as another hand did. He started in shock, quickly drawing his hand away.
“Sorry!” he squeaked, his cheeks flushed. He looked at the other person, almost gasping. It was a boy, the same age as Regulus, from what he could tell. The boy had sandy blonde hair that fell in curls, his eyes a gorgeous brown.
“It’s fine, you can take it,” the boy offered, boyishly grinning.
“No, I was merely looking,” Regulus uttered after a moment, scanning the boy still. It seemed that the other noticed this.
“I’m Louis,” He introduced, offering a hand to Regulus.
“Regulus.”
“Interesting name,” Louis commented, still grinning, “For what I am going to guess is an interesting man.
…
Smiling sheepishly, Regulus stood with Louis outside of Louis’ home.
“I had a really nice time tonight,” Regulus said softly, his hands clasped together in front of himself.
“I did too,” Louis breathes out, “I think it’d be a real shame if we didn’t do it again.”
“I am inclined to agree,” Regulus mused. They stood in silence for just a minute before Louis broke it by clearing his throat.
“May I kiss you, Reglus?”
“Please do.”
…
Regulus had his ear pressed against Louis’ chest, both of them breathing a tad heavy.
Louis laid with no clothes whereas Regulus only had a long sleeve shirt on, not wanting Louis to see the serpent branding on his forearm.
“I love you,” Regulus uttered, curling up further into Louis’ side. He felt his partner's lips graze the top of his head.
“And I love you, to the day I die and even after then.”
…
“What the fuck is going of, Regulus!?”
Regulus flinched at the yell from Louis. He didn’t know what to say. He hadn’t expected Louis to see it.
“I- it’s hard to explain!” Regulus weakly defended, his arms wrapped around himself as a form of comfort.
“I don’t care, just try,” Louis seethed, looking pointedly to the mark on his arm that seemed to move.
“You really want to know?” Regulus whispered, heart pounding in his chest. For the next few minutes, Regulus explained everything. Magic, Hogwarts, blood ideals and the Dark Lord. His hands shook as he explained it all, tears in his eyes but he did not cry. He didn’t dare look at Louis.
“So… you’re one of these… death people? Who hates normal people like me?” Louis asks quietly.
“Yes, but no. I joined them because my whole family is part of them. I chose to survive but I do not hate muggles or muggleborns, not anymore,” Regulus answered honestly. He still looked down, only looking up when Louis sat down and sighed.
“Come here,” Louis softly instructed. Regulus tentatively stepped to him, melting when he pulled Regulus onto his lap. Louis wrapped the shorter boy in his arms.
“What you told me… it isn't okay, but we’ll figure it out, alright?”
“I’m sorry.”
…
Regulus had been away for three days on a mission. He had briefly stopped home to clean up before apparating to Louis’ flat.
He looked forward to seeing his boyfriend, just as he always did.
Unfortunately though, he did not arrive at a scene that he had wished he did.
Instead of seeing Louis curled up on the couch with a book, he was greeted with the man laying on the floor, eyes open and unblinking.
Regulus practically fell to Louis’ side, checking his pulse despite knowing that there would be none. A sob tore through him and tears ran down his face.
He had been so careful not to let anyone know of his relationship with Louis. He thought he could keep the muggle man safe from his world, and from him.
…
Louis’ funeral fell on a sunny day.
It was fitting, Regulus thought, for the boy who shined.
Regulus stood at the back and left when the reception began, unable to be there any longer.
Arriving at Grimmauld Place 12 took everything in him.
He was tired, having hardly slept since Louis died.
He certainly could not deal with his mother who still grieved Orion Black.
Unfortunately for him, Walburga was waiting for him in the lounge, sitting on the couch with a glass of wine in her hand, mindlessly swirling the beverage.
“I did you a favour, Regulus,” she said hollowly when he entered the room. Regulus froze in the doorway, eyeing her warily. “Spending such time with a boy is bad enough, but you chose a muggle boy.” She continued, unaware of Regulus’ growing panic. “Killing the boy myself was merciful. He didn’t suffer. But you, on the other hand, have to be punished for such horrid behaviour.”
Walburga finally turned to her son, eyes cold and wand in hand now. Regulus didn’t get a chance to draw his own wand before Walburga had the tip of his wand pointing at him, her mouth forming a word Regulus had heard too many times.
“Crucio.”
…
Regulus leaned forward, letting his lips ghost his lover’s headstone for just one last time.
Getting up, he looked longingly at the name, memorising it all.
And with that, he turned away, leaving the grave and Louis at last.
…
Regulus now had just one last stop before Kreacher would take him to the cave.
He was uncertain about this, but he carried on, a leather bound diary in his possession so that the Order may have an advantage.
It took Regulus weeks to track the apartment down but when he finally stood in front of the door, everything in him screamed for him to leave.
However, Regulus forced his hand up and knocked on the door, heart thundering. He hadn;t bothered with the hood for this, so he knew that the apartment's occupant would know him straight away.
The door creaked open and Regulus held his breath.
Sirius Black now stood in the doorway, confused for a moment before it settled that Regulus was there. With wide eyes, Sirius drew his wand, pointing it to Regulus’ head.
“How did you find me?” he seethed, voice venomous.
“I need to talk to you, please,” Regulus whispered, his hands up to show he was wandless.
“I ought to call the Aurors.”
“I know. But please, Sirius,” Regulus pleaded, his voice cracking. He could see the contemplation in Sirius's eyes before he let his arm drop, wand no longer pointed at the younger man.
“Five minutes. That’s all you have to convince me not to call the Auror’s or the Order.”
Regulus let out a breath of relief, stepping into the apartment when Sirius moved from the doorway.
…
The brothers sat at the dining room table opposite each other, each with a mug of tea though Regulus’ had veritasium in it to ensure he did not lie.
“Spit it out,” Sirius demanded.
“I am going to deflect.”
Silence filled the room, Sirius practically gaping at his younger brother.
“Tonight, actually. And after a lot of inner conflict, I decided I should get my last goodbyes in,” Regulus uttered quietly, taking a sip of his tea.
“Last goodbyes?” Sirius repeated. “What, do you plan to off yourself? Avoid the war?”
“Not quite. I will be acting in hopes that the Dark Lord may be mortal once more, it is just that I doubt I will live to tell the tale.”
“You’ve got to be shitting me,” Sirius groaned, watching his brother wish harsh eyes. “You-Know-Who is immortal? And you plan to defy him and die?”
“Correct. It… has to be done,” Regulus confirmed, “I cannot tell you much more as it would present too much danger. However, I will give you this.” Regulus took the book from where it had been concealed in his robes. He slid it across the table and watched Sirius flick through it, finding information about the Death Eaters and Voldemort himself.
“The Order will help you.”
“No, Sirius. I have to do this. And… I am not scared to die. Not since I lost the last person I had left,” Regulus breathed out, at last meeting Sirius’ eyes.
“No,” Sirius practically growled. “You’re not going to die. You are going to prove that you are not a spineless coward, Regulus.”
“I do not detest that I am a coward. That does not change what I must do,” Regulus said sharply, leaving no room to argue.
“Why come here, then?”
“Because, despite everything, I still think of you as my brother, even if you don’t think of me as yours.”
…
Regulus heard Sirius’ door bang open mere minutes after the screaming finally stopped.
Hoping it to be safe, Regulus ventured to Sirius’ room, intending to heal the injuries as best as he could.
“Sirius?” Regulus said softly, confusion etched on his face when he saw the older boy’s trunk flung open and him throwing clothes and other objects in it.
“Get out,” Sirius said lowly, not even looking at Regulus.
“What are you doing?”
“Don’t act like an idiot, Regulus.” Regulus gulped, eyes panicked.
“You… you can’t leave, Sirius!” He got out, “Mother and Father-”
“Shut up about them!” Sirius snapped, finally looking at his brother with hate in his eyes, “I am leaving this horrid place, no matter what.”
“You can’t just leave me here alone, Sirius!”
“Why not? You fit in perfectly,” Sirius snarled, ignoring the look of hurt on Regulus’ face.
“But I’m your brother-”
“-You are no brother of mine,” Sirius said, closing his trunk. Regulus felt his heart shatter, tears in his eyes as Sirius left.
…
“I’ve always regretted that,” Sirius admits, knowing what Regulus was referring to.
“It was deserved. No matter how much you hurt me, I hurt you far more by never protecting you like you did for me,” Regulus says, having thought about this for quite a while.
“I was never mad at you, for that. I hated you, though, for never standing up for yourself,” Sirius replied, rubbing the back of his neck.
“I’ve made a lot of mistakes, Sirius. Mistakes that I cannot come back from,” Regulus settles on saying after the two sit in silence for a couple minutes. “I need to die, but I promise, if I can live, I will.”
Sirius watches his younger brother for a moment, tears welling up in his eyes but he tried to force himself not to cry.
“Just… try to come back, yeah? I want my brother back.”
Regulus smiles weakly, his own eyes watering. Almost in sync, they both stand up, walking around the table and into each other’s arms.
Sirius held his brother tightly, Regulus burying his face in the crook of Sirius’ neck like he used to always do when they were young children.
“I love you, Sirius.”
“I know, Reggie. I love you too.”
…
Eight days later, Sirius received a letter.
To Sirius Orion Black,
Regulus has been declared dead. You are not invited to the funeral.
Sincerely, Narcissa Malfoy
Sirius felt his knees go weak and he sobbed, dropping the letter in favour of covering his mouth as he did not want to wake Remus.
He crumpled to the floor, wrapping an arm around his legs.
He knew it was coming. But it still hurts.
Sirius remained on the floor for over an hour before Remus came out of their bedroom, taking one look at Sirius.
With no hesitation, Remus got to the floor and pulled Sirius close to him, feeling Sirius wrap his arms around him desperately.
“He’s gone, Moony. He’s gone.”