Chapter 1
I look up from my poor lunch, two eggs and some beans. Nothing looks good to me... I just wish I could stay in my bed and rehash the last few years over and over again…Go softly mad, forget reality and stay in my mind with them forever. Forget everything and live peacefully in a dream. I envy you Alice….trully.
That laugh again. Why must he have the same laugh as Jam…as his father. Potter a few tables away is living his best life with his friends doing some pre-holiday homework. Impossible to miss him with his army of Gryffindors listening to him as if the truths of the universe were coming out of his mouth. It looks like a sect; this entire house is crazy….
I can't stand it anymore; I'm going to explode in the middle of the great hall….
- Clarisse, Pansy whispers to me, you're making the whole table shake. Calm down…Dumby is looking at you…
Indeed, the director has his eyes directly fixed on me. Of course, he doesn't want people to know. He doesn't want HIS survivor to know. Several breaths in… but the air just makes me want to vomit, scream, cry, die.
Time seems to freeze, the only thing I can stare at are his glasses. The face was the same but the eyes are the wrong colour. He turns his head and his eyes meet mine. He shoots his best lion gaze at the snake that I am then finally looks confused. The look of hate becomes compassionate and I can't bear it, it's too much. I get up hastily, the lunch forgotten and flee the great hall as quickly as possible. I need air and fast or I blow up the whole castle.
I finally run, I run down the stairs, almost knock over several armours, get yelled at by a few students and maybe even Filch himself but it does not matter, I know where I have to go. Where it all began.
Two weeks earlier
- Why McGonagall always gives homework for the week before the vacation, even Snape isn't so cruel!
- No one would have had homework if Draco closed his damn mouth, he really thought that calling the teacher a sewer cat was a good idea… I whispered.
From the side I could easily hear the blond grumbling, a chihuahua unable to bite...
- Excuse me my lord, I meant your wonderful mouth.
- I prefer that my lady, he answered with his crystalline laugh.
Even from my place by the lake I could hear Millicent cursing her parents and her fiancé. Being stuck with Lord Draco all her life was going to be a funny thing.
- Hey princess!
- Hey Blaise.
The only guy who can call a girl princess so calmly, if I didn't know him since diapers, I would fall in love with him. The problem is that he is my best friend like our whole gang is and I am completely aromantic.
- How can you put both hands in the mud, it's disgusting. I hear your mother's comments from here...
I raise my head from the said-heap of mud to see his face stuck in a gesture of disgust.
- Please don't remind me what my mother might say, please, I'm at Hogwarts for a few more days, I don't want to think about all the etiquette before I get back to the manor. And for your education Mr. "I open a manual every blue moon", I am looking for small plants for Professor Sprout.
- Couldn't she do it alone? I don't want to get ahead of myself but that's not her job?
- For your information young padawan, Sprout has back pains and cannot do it. At the last lesson, she complained that she was missing the season for this little yellow plant. I said while showing him the famous herb.
- You're such a Hufflepuff it's crazy… always ready to help!
He says that with a mocking smile while giving a wobbly military salute.
- On the other hand, what is a padawan?
I push him with my clean hand and throw at him:
- I'm not doing it for her, stupid, I'm doing it for me and incidentally my house. If I bring it back to her during the next break, she will give me points and be on our side for the House Cup.
- Oh! I was wrong, you are a real Slytherin!
- If you say so, I believe you. I just need to hurry before Longbottom thinks of it. For the moment he is still in the infirmary for I do not know what, I must take advantage of my luck!
The brunette laughed one last time at my "outburst of sympathy" as he described it directly to Pansy and went back under the tree with the others, leaving me alone on the edge of the lake.
The day was perfect to enjoy the park. The sun high in the sky, the west wind and the owls hooting in the distance. The midday break is the best time of the day to spread out in the park. Looking around me I could see almost all the students on the edges of the lake. All in the afternoon revisions or just the nose towards the sun to try a minute of English tanning. Being a student here is heaven.
I was taken out of my little universe by the little argument between Blaise and Draco. The two were once again arguing over what might have happened at the bottom of the lake during the second task of the tournament. Draco is certain that Potter would have managed to save two "victims" by making a deal with a mermaid while Blaise bets that the saviour would have just used his wand. For weeks they've been fighting over it like the truth really do matters. Draco just wants to prove that he's not offended at not being chosen as the “victim”, he who is dating the second Hogwarts champion. Impossible to make him understand that as it is a kind of secret, the organizers could not choose him. But getting the blond to understand something is impossible when he is certain of the opposite…impossible.
Watching them fight is so interesting that I didn't hear Pansy yell "WATCH OUT!" THE SQUID! ". As I was dreaming, I had not realized the distance between the group and me but also the new pressure that a certain creature was beginning to exert on my ankle. As I lowered my gaze to my leg the ground slipped beneath me and I was quickly submerged beneath the surface. By reflex I started to scream and the dirty water rushed into my throat and then my nose. With all the strength I possessed I attempted a swim towards the light but I only made a few ripples on the surface before the beast pulled me back into the darkness. The feeling of choking on emptiness made my brain burn; the world was gradually getting darker and darker and finally my last thought before fainting was: “Why put such an animal in a school’s lake?! ".
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Air ! Air !
So many sensations exploded around me at once! Water came out of my lungs in spurts to be replaced by air, the latter seemed to burn my throat like the water had done a few minutes before. The smell of the lake water mixed with the mud was horrible, the weight of my wet clothes really uncomfortable. Finally the worst was the sharp pain on my chest, as if someone had jumped with both feet on my rib cage.
Slowly I open my eyes, the light is not that horrible. I expected to have my retinas scorched by the midday sun but finally the sky was very cloudy and a few drops of rain were starting to fall. How could the sky change mood so quickly?
A movement to the side made me turn my head. Just to my right a boy was sitting on his lap. I took the time to come to my senses and then I really became aware of my surroundings. The boy wore a red and gold Quidditch uniform, his broom to his right, an archaic model by the way. Wet black hair, brown eyes, and like me short on breath after a long time in the lake. He ends up asking me breathlessly:
- You’re okay?
I admit I needed a moment of reflection before answering him.
- I think so. I remember the bottom of the lake then nothing, total darkness.
The brunette seemed reassured and finally laughed. I knew that laugh. I heard it every day in the Great Hall for two years and when he visited Draco's room on the weekends. I hated that damn laugh. How had I not recognized it at the time, probably because his mop of hair is flattened by the water.
- Why are you laughing Potter? You gonna report me for dangerous swimming to Dumby?
The thought seemed to surprise him because his laughing face softened to suspicious.
- So first of all, I never divulge anything to the director, especially not to go against the far too strict rules of this school. And second, how do you know my name? I don't think I've seen you before. You are definitely a student here, given the uniform, even if you miss the tie and the sweater.
Indeed, looking at my outfit, I had on me only my skirt and my shirt. I had removed the rest to take advantage of the break and not stain my things with the lake water. It's a bit of a miss now... But all that didn't explain why Potter didn't recognize me. We have spent the last few months together despite my unhidden hatred for him since he is dating one of my best friends. A year's difference doesn't seem to bother him and he treats me like some kind of child.
- Don't play with me Potter. I had the scare of my life, even I can put the hate aside after a near-death experience.
- I repeat that I don't know you. You are really strange.
He scratches the back of his head and stares at me as if I'm talking to him in Chinese. I hate this face so much.
- You're really stupid.
I tried to get up but the earth quickly called me back to her and I ended up again with my buttocks in the mud. Disregarding my comment and as the perfect Gryffindor, Potter hurriedly helped me up. While doing this he continued:
- I really don't know who you are. I don't understand what you have against me, but I think you really should go see Madam Pomfrey. You are still very pale.
- I don't understand what game you're playing either Potter but I still agree with you, I don't feel well at all.
Just after saying his words, I felt the few remnants of my hearty lunch go up my oesophagus and end up on my saviour’s pretty shoes.
- We're going quickly to Pomfrey!
Without asking, he took me in his arms and ran almost all the way to the infirmary. I know I'm ashamed but for the second time today, I fainted.
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I woke up, but unlike the last time, this experience is much more comfortable. I'm in a very soft and fluffy bed. I'm just warm enough and feel comfortable. I wonder what could have woken me up. A stormy conversation behind the curtain around my bed answers me:
- You really don't know who she is Mr Potter?!
- I repeat to you Professor McGonagall, I never saw her before taking her out of the lake. But she knew my last name and kept telling me how much she hated me. I promise you she’s a total stranger.
- Stranger or not, she is an injured student, she is therefore under MY jurisdiction, I forbid you to take her out of bed Minerva!
- Please calm down my dear. I trust you to take great care of our students but this young girl is unknown to us. In the midst of war, you can understand our suspicion.
Pause.
- You Potter go back to class, you have nothing more to do here.
- But professor?
- No "but"! Back to class!
- My next class is in two hours professor. Note that I didn't say "but".
- Stop this behaviour young man and go join your friends. I'm sure Mr Black is looking for you everywhere right now.
Another pause, and then a door is shut.