Inferior
A Woman of Inferior Birth
Lily had almost made it to the door. She was surprised the beating of her heart wasn’t actually audible all over Dumbledore Hall. Her hand reached for the doorknob when suddenly she heard a sound from behind the door. She froze. If she left now, she would surely run into whoever was walking down the corridor and thus be seen fleeing a room with an unmarried man.
“I’m sure she has not left yet, for I made an arrangement with her guardian,” the voice of Mr Snape was easy to recognise. Lily recoiled, she shrank backwards, into the darkness, until her back touched the immovable bookcases that lined the walls of the room.
“Mr Snape, I’m sure she’s a tempting armful but why do you insist to offer for a woman of such inferior birth? It seems detrimental to the path you’ve outlined for yourself, if I were you I’d consider having the milk but not the cow. Go Carte-blanche, my dear fellow.”
“You make an interesting suggestion, Lord Yaxley…” Snape drawled.
Lily closed her eyes, the voices were so loud, they had to be right outside the door of the library. If they came in… She could hardly breathe. When the steps continued she clasped her hand in front of her mouth, eyes still shut tight.
It was one thing to know how other’s perceived her, it was another entirely to hear the words spoken out loud. She was near trembling.
A hand touched her wrist, and she almost cried out, she’d completely forgotten she wasn’t alone.
“Miss Evans, please don’t let their words disturb you. They only speak filth, none of that is true.”
She opened her eyes to see Lord Potter stand before her, eyes filled with genuine concern.
She looked from his hand on her wrist back to his face. His eyes widened and he released her, taking a step backwards.
“Please, forgive me my impropriety,” he said.
She nodded, her throat incapable of forming sounds. She started toward the door.
“I have to go, my lord,” she said but before she had taken more than two steps she thought better of leaving. If her lot were truly sealed, if she had no escape other than ruining a good man’s life and rob him of his choice, which she refused to do, could she then at least have one sweet memory of something better? Could she at least have an answer to one of the many questions that kept her up at night? “Could I ask you something, my Lord?” she said, turning around, her heart racing madly and her cheeks aflame (at least that was hardly visible in the little light, she thought).
He nodded, she saw herself reflected in his glasses.
“I know your opinion on my sex,” she began, “So let me assure you, I have no intention to snare you into a loveless match, nor anyone else for that matter, but…I've heard you are experienced...”she wrung her hands. She couldn’t go on. It was too much to ask. It was too embarrassing to say the words out loud.
“Miss Evans, whatever Mr Snape might have told you about me, I’m not in the habit of…”
Lily’s face fell at his words, she had thought him experienced, and she had hoped that to mean he would be… less virtuous, so he wouldn’t refuse her this. Had she foolishly thought he might even have taken pleasure in it himself? Even if she'd never kissed a man, had no idea how to make it pleasurable, how to even do it. Once more she cursed the world she grew up in, to have kept her so sheltered and uninformed.
“I’d hoped you would kiss me, my Lord,” she rushed to say and when his mouth fell open she realised what an absolute fool she’d made of herself.
“I’m sorry,” she mumbled and made for the door.
“Wait, Miss Evans,” he said but she was already turning the handle, pulling the door toward her. Only to discover the door would not open. She tried once more but it made no difference, only a racket. The door was locked.
She turned and found Lord Potter with his hands raised in the air. “Miss Evans, I apologise, I only meant to keep you safe from unwanted attention. You were asleep when I came in and I was worried someone else could come upon you in here…”
Lily swallowed, suddenly very aware of her own recklessness. What if she had been found by a man like Mr Snape? She shuddered at the thought. Strangely, she didn't feel unsafe with this man. Even if he'd locked her in with him. Despite his reputation, although she now believed even less of what Mr Snape had told her about the man standing with his hands up as if she was about to shoot him.
“Please, Miss Evans, let me go out first to see that there is no one about in the corridor. That way you can leave safely,” he said, fishing the key out of his pocket. His voice was subdued, he looked worried. “I know you believe me the worst kind of rake, but I assure you I only want you to be safe.”
“And here I thought you believed every woman out to snare you?” she couldn’t help but say.
He shook his head, “Miss Evans, I apologise for my arrogant words. You’ll be happy to know that the only woman I would wish to trap me, has assured me she has absolutely no intention to do just that.”
Lily stared at him, he looked nervous, but also hopeful? Who could this woman be? Who would have the nerve to tell Lord Potter outright she had no intentions to compromise him, nor trap him… oh…
A sliver of hope started in her chest, could it be?
“My Lord, forgive me my curiosity, but I can not but wonder how you had hoped this lady to proceed, how does one successfully snare the elusive Lord Potter,” she said, flushing again, for what if she’d grossly misunderstood?
Lord Potter stood with the key in his hand, he seemed to think about how to answer her. Then he said, studying her carefully, “it all depends on what she would be comfortable with of course, but I would not be opposed to being found with her, in a room alone. Perhaps…” He hesitated, “…she wouldn’t mind spending some of that time in amorous congress…” he blushed and added. “Only if the lady would wish it, I would never… it’s just that she did suggest something…of the kind, and I’d do anything she asked of me.”
“Would you?” Lily asked out of breath as if she’d been running instead of standing here listening.
“Miss Evans. Lily. Please, I beg you to snare me up, to compromise me, to make me do the honour bound thing, unless of course, you prefer to accept my offer for your hand directly."