The Amulet

Severus woke with a start. A gasp trapped in his throat as his eyes wildly searched his surroundings. His muscles tensed at the unfamiliarity of the room as he pre-emptively clenched his jaw in effort to dampen the sound of each strike of his erratic heartbeat. The steady hum of the magic encasing him rippled reassuringly up his field of vision, a healing aura of ocean-green magic he was very familiar with from his time at Hogwarts. The egg-white colour of the ceiling and walls along with the potent smell of dittany in the air led him to surmise he was within a healing facility.

Not dead yet, he mentally quipped.

A melodious guffaw that only could have come from a young child ended in a playful screech on his right. Baffled, Severus tilted his chin to face it and his heart stuttered in rhythm at the sight of Lily bouncing Harry on her lap a distance away. Severus’ vision tunnelled until all he saw was how the light nearby made Lily’s hair look like long tendrils of flames that swayed to and fro as she dived to playfully nuzzle Harry’s neck making him squeal and drawback bashfully at the attention. Her mischievous green eyes glowed before disappearing out of sight to make way for her flushed cheeks and her wide smile.

She was the embodiment of spring.

It was as if his time away from her was a long dreary winter. It was a sight he relished in but the feeling began to ebb away when he reflected she no longer looked at him that way.

He felt the muscles of his cheeks slowly droop into neutrality, unaware of when he started smiling. It was unsurprising. Lily always had a way in engrossing him with her light until he forgot what a sorry sod he was. With her, anything seemed possible. He thought himself capable, inventive and bright when she stood by his side.

Severus’ field of vision widened to the rest of the room, and the warm glow faded to the clinical white above from the static Lumos charm held in place. He shuddered as if from a chill, but he understood that winter would truly never be over for people like him. It was set too deep in his soul and he found himself both hating and loving the small reprieve. He forcibly looked away from the tender scene to focus on his body. There was a stiffness and ache he was all too familiar with from his time in the holding cell at the Ministry. He lifted his hand to his face and rotated it until his palm was facing him, testily curling his fingers before stretching them once more. His eyes narrowed at the length of his nails and the dirt and rock caked underneath it. He couldn’t recall doing anything to warrant it to be in such a state. The Ministry holding cell was not clean by any means but Severus made little use of his hands knowing that he would be using them in place of utensils.

A flash of dark tattered robes and the gurgling sound of a death’s rattle echoed in the room. Severus’ eyes stared unseeingly at his hand as the vision took hold of his sight. The tips of his fingers curled at the memory of him clawing at the stone floor trying to find something to grip as the dementor behind him tried to suck everything from within the cell into its bottomless mouth. He could hear a rhythmic knocking in his ears as he witnessed the scene as if he was still there. His body once more tensing in fight or flight, oblivious to the small micro-movements he made that mirrored his past actions as the memory played out like a reel. He clenched his hands into fists when he heard the screams of the woman of the cell next door, and he ground his teeth to resist doing the same when the wrinkly grey hand outstretched towards him began to close the distance. He could feel the omission of life and magic and the resounding thrum of his heartbeat within his ears. Severus nearly jumped right out of his skin at the pressure on his wrist and his wide panicked eyes snapped to the blue eyes of the Healer who held it.

“-does that sound good to you, Mr. Snape?” The Healer said with a kind smile.

Severus could visibly see how his view of her was being distorted. She moved up and down as he heaved deep gulps of breath from his panic. He internally berated himself to erect his Occlumency shield to get himself back into control but he found he was unable to. The memory of the near-death experience had him more than visibly shaken.

The Healer’s rosy lips dropped in concern and her pale blue eyes scanned him. “Are you okay?”

The sound of her voice anchored him to reality and he managed to raise a curtain in the depths of his mind to obscure his emotions. The change was instantaneous, he cast his eyes downward, and he held his breath a couple beats to regulate his breathing, his heart soon followed afterwards until he appeared no less than his normal state.

He dared himself to look at her eyes with a challenging look that was more for himself than for her and managed to say with a sarcastic drawl, “Oh, yes. Never been better.”

He could see her head rear back in surprise before shaking it slightly of the confusion. She plastered on a smile once more, this one less kind than the initial one she gave.

“Well, then,” she said as a means of having something to say before she averted her eyes from the intensity of his gaze to the tray she brought sitting on top of a rolling cart line with potions marked with different numbers, and fumbled with the pages of her clipboard.

A sting of pain prickled on the palm of Severus’s hand and he craned his neck up discreetly to look at them. There were crescent marks left behind as he uncurled his fingers. He exhaled briefly in disappointment at his lack of control before placing them face down by his sides and looking back at the Healer.

The Healer picked up bottles of potions using the white of her apron to clean the muck and webs from some of them. It was unusual to see potion bottles lined up unless it was for a classroom setting. Potion bottles were often stored in a cellar or a dungeon for future use. Small batches using vials or drops were used for everyday use but the bottles always stayed where they were. He didn’t feel as if his symptoms justified an entire potion bottle, not even to take home.

The healer gave a soft hum of surprise and Severus could only assume she found what she was looking for when she doublechecked it with her clipboard but instead of turning to face him, she pivoted until she was adjacent to Lily and handed her the bottle.

“As discussed before, take plenty of breaks for the next week and allow yourself to recover.” From within her lime-green pockets, the Healer pulled out five vials of potions and presented them to Lily. She gave her a pitying look as she ensured her eyes held Lily’s even as she struggled to hug Harry to herself so he would behave. “The dreamless sleep potion can only be taken this week, I’m afraid. Anything beyond this would outweigh the benefits. Take no other over-the-counter potions.”

“I understand,” Lily said seriously, all mirth from her gone.

The Healer angled her hand down to deposit the vials into Lily’s waiting hand, the vials clinked as they disappeared into the pocket of Lily’s beige robes.

The Healer scanned her chart once more until she reached the end of the first page and tapped her index picture at something there. “Your Healer suspects that you will feel more pain during the night when there are no distractions to occupy your mind and the pain will hit most intensely. The tremors from the curse will ease on its own within a week while taking the potion but in case it doesn’t, please come back for a follow-up.”

Lily nodded and thanked her as she watched the healer tilt her head down in farewell before moving the curtain and leaving.

Severus stared after her, the silence that was left behind was filled with Severus’ internal questions.

What happened to Lily? How did she get hurt?

Lily’s vibrant green eyes drew him in like a magnet when they watched him. There were several moments of them just staring at each other and just existing before the spell broke with Harry arching his back in protest to his mother’s hold.

“You were cursed?” Severus’ voice croaked from underuse and he swallowed in an attempt to moisten his dry mouth.

Lily gave a small smile. “Thirsty?”

Severus cleared his throat to respond but became distracted when Lily readjusted Harry to puzzle him on her hips before crossing the short distance to take an empty glass on the bedside table and pulling out her wand while mouthing the spell to conjure water into it. Severus watched the cup greedily, already feeling the sensation of the liquid in his mouth. Lily handed him the cup, as he sat himself up to take a sip.

“The staff filled out and replaced the water the first two days but after the third day, I told them I would take over and ensure you had water when you woke up.”

Severus choked in between sips and sputtered out. “Three days?”

As if looking at Severus was too much, Lily occupied herself with interacting with Harry and engaging him in play once more by poking his nose. He cooed in response. “I was surprised too that Harry woke before you.”

Severus’ mind whirled in confusion trying to connect the dots but feeling like he was narrowly missing his answers. “Harry? Er- What? What happened?”

There was a long gap of silence before Lily sighed and regrouped. “What was the last thing you remembered?”

Severus looked at her.

This close he could see the thin spidery veins of her skin, the bruised coloured bags under her eyes and the puffiness of her face. She looked unwell. The Healer said she was cursed. What curse would require that big of a bottle to treat that a spell couldn’t fix?

He wanted to reach out to hear, ensure himself that she was fine and he found his hands eagerly twitching to satiate that need but he refrained. Instead, he asked again, as calmly as he could with the anxiety hiking up his body. “What happened?”

She spent the next half-hour recounting everything that happened during her stay at Sirius Black’s. She seemed to skirt the details of her stay before revealing what led her to admit Harry into St Mungo’s care.  Very quickly he could feel a sense of hopelessness overwhelming him at not being able to help her while this happened before it was replaced with anger when she enlightened him to the name of her torturer.

Bellatrix.

His eyes hardened in reflex.

How could he have forgotten? Bellatrix imparted the news shortly after he arrived in Azkaban. He could hear the faded echo of her cruel laugh as she was swept away by the Aurors. He ground his teeth to hold back a snarl.

Lily. His brave Lily had been cursed with the Cruciatus Curse. Not only once, but many times. No wonder she needed the entire potion bottle.

Severus could tell Lily appeared to be bothered by his look by the way she leaned back and protectively angled herself so Harry was further away from him. The motion saddened him, and he cast his gaze downward to strengthen his Occlumency shields.

“Then, Dumbledore came and he knew straight away what happened and what caused Harry to react in such a way.” She paused as if waiting for him to fill in the blank. He had no idea what she was getting at. “The amulet,” she said, encouraging him along with a circular hand motion.

“The what?” Severus blinked in confusion.

She tilted her head and let out an exasperated sigh. She reached under the collar of Harry’s muggle shirt and pulled out the chain exposing the amulet underneath. The glisten of the ruby disk caught his eyes momentarily and he found himself mesmerized by its unique colouring.

“Do you remember when you placed this on Harry?” Lily asked with a raised brow.

Now that she brought it up, he did. Snippets of information helpfully started to pour in. It had been too long since he last saw her and Harry, and what occurred months ago felt like years to him. The amulet seemed like such a small detail in the midst of things and Harry felt like he had always been his son. He couldn’t discern when that mental and emotional change happened in such a short time, and he felt internal resistance to the idea of questioning the validity of it.

“I do,” he finally said, leaning back, unaware when he leaned forward in the first place.

Lily scoffed at the amulet, “Well, this little necklace hid a very large secret that nearly killed Harry.” She let out an odd giggle that ended in a sarcastic smile. “Anything that happens to you, happens to him. I don’t know the extent of it but the proof is in the pudding.”

Severus laid a hand over his heart as it sunk in worry and disappointment. Couldn’t he get anything right? “Why does he still have it on?”

Immediately after he said it he regretted it. What if she misinterpreted it as an insult?

Lily seemed unphased by his words. “Dumbledore thinks we should do more research on it. Removing it could result in something far worse.”

Worse than death?

She seemed in tune with his expressions because she let out a long sigh and as if reading his mind, responded, “I know. I know. I thought the same. But now that you’re in the clear, I figured as long as you don’t go tallying up more war crimes, there won’t be a need for you to go back to Azkaban. If he sticks close to you until we have this figured out then it wouldn’t be as dangerous. All we would need to do is go to your family vault where you found it and look for clues, documents or diaries. We might even figure this out by the end of the week.”

Lily’s hope sounded false to his ears almost like she was trying to convince herself.

“Erm…” He had no idea what to say. The Prince vault was barely a pittance in amount and he found himself embarrassed to show her. He couldn’t withhold his cringe when he suggested they go at their first opportunity.

The telling of events abruptly ended soon after and Severus rummaged through his thoughts to find another topic to prevent awkward silence.

“So, now that Black’s place has been blown up, where are you staying now?” Severus closed his eyes as he internally groaned.

Shut up, now, he mentally berated.

“Well, nowhere yet.” Severus watched as she shuffled in place and fiddled with the bottom of Harry’s jumper. “You see… We’ve been waiting for you to wake up. We, as in Harry and I.”

She must have hit a mental block because her words tapered off. He wanted to reassure her. Then his hand touched hers as if it had a mind of its own and her eyes met his, the suddenness of it startled him more than it should have.

“It’s okay,” he said awkwardly patting her. Then he moved his hand to his lap so his other could guard it from doing something stupid.

Lily hesitantly nodded with a curious look in her eyes that had Severus adjust his bedsheet in an effort to avoid it.

“Since Harry has to stay close to you anyway, I was wondering whether you could watch over him until I’m more stable. I’ve found myself in a spot of bother with the lack of resources to secure a home for us both. The Order has been marvellous in other avenues but it’s not very family-friendly and I don’t want to place someone else in unnecessary risk.” At Severus’ stunned look, Lily hurriedly continued. “It’s just for a little while, and I could come every day to collect him while you attend classes.”

That seemed like a safe topic to latch on to. “Classes?”

“Oh! Of course you don’t know.” She chided herself. “Since your admittance to St Mungo’s three days ago, Dumbledore had been trying to clear the acceptance of your teaching application from probation. He managed to get you hired as a Teaching Assistance to Slughorn for the rest of the school year. He hopes you would take Slughorn’s place when he retires this summer.”

Severus scoffed in disbelief at Dumbledore’s action. Darn that man! Did he need him anymore now that the majority of the Death Eaters were in Azkaban? What was he playing at?

“Erm,” Lily said smiling shyly at him. He was staring again, wasn’t he? “Congratulations?”

Severus cleared his throat trying to decide what to focus on. “If you need someplace to stay I still have my home in Spinner’s End.”

Lily winced and groaned. “I’m so sorry, Sev.”

“What? What is it?”

“Shortly after you were incarcerated, the Death Eaters burned Spinner’s End. There’s nothing left of it.”

With lips pursed to prevent anything too obscene from coming out, Severus let out a pained moan. His eyes naturally closed when he massaged the bridge of his nose and he chuckled. “Anything else?”

“Nope,” she chirped.

Severus didn’t know how long he took to compose himself but the tension in his chest was still present when he spoke again. “Not Spinner’s End then. Why don’t you just stay with me?”

Lily offered a warm smile. “That’s very kind of you but Hogwarts doesn’t allow non-family members to stay.”

“Out of the grounds?” Asked Severus, a plan forming in his head. “Hogsmeade, perhaps?”

A pregnant silence filled the room. His eyes searched hers only to notice an indecipherable look on her. “Thank you,” she said slowly. “If it’s not too much trouble.”

“It’s nothing unmanageable.” He said almost dismissively.

It was time to put his fortune to good use.

Maybe he could even convince her to stay.

TBC…