0.005%
Since the day he bought Mr. Weasley a muggle TV for his birthday, Harry found himself watching football with the family every Sunday. It was their routine. Harry got to spend some time with his big family including Hermione and occasionally Nevil and Luna. Mrs. Weasley got a chance to feed them all. George got a chance to tease him endlessly. They all loved it.
And he meant ALL. As much as his husband tries to deny it, he loves the Weasley’s house and even more being included in their family.
It was hard at first. Harry will admit that the circumstances of them finding out about his relationship was less than ideal (except Hermione because she just knew and Luna said something about their souls being intertwined). George had made a joke about how they were all doomed if the chosen one couldn’t get laid. Harry said, without thinking, something along the lines of ‘That’s a you problem. I have no problems getting it every Saturday night.’
Molly dropped every pot in the kitchen. George’s face broke into a horrible grin. Ron’s mouth was hanging open. Hermione was pinching the bridge of her nose. Harry had instant regret and wondered if he could play it off as a joke. After about an hour of pestering from Ron, Ginny, and George, he cracked. Told them he has been seeing Draco Malfoy and the chaos grew. Hermione had yelled at them that ‘they ought to be ashamed of themselves because Harry was happy and they all knew it.’
Somehow, a week later the press was gathered outside of Draco’s apartment and followed them everywhere. EVERYWHERE. The grocery store. Harry’s house. Hermione and Ron’s house. Clothing stores. The only safe place seemed to be Luna’s and the Weasley’s house.
The front page had been plastered with threats to Draco’s life, claims of insanity, and possible death eater resurrection. Harry would be lying if he didn’t say that Draco looked damn good in the photo’s. His platinum hair grew to his shoulders and, on one instance, drowned in Harry’s sweater when he made the mistake of trying to let the cat out.
One particularly trying day, a journalist looking for a scoop told Lucius about their relationship and headlined every gossip magazine with "Lucius Malfoy claims his son is a ‘pathetic whore’ for dating Harry Potter".
Harry was unsuccessfully trying to get Draco to stop hyperventilating, when Molly flooed in with a box of chocolate chip cookies. She took one look at Draco in Harry’s arms on the floor, his eyes swollen with tears and his breaths short and wheezing slightly and decided that Draco was going to be accepted into her family if she had to strangle the rest into accepting him too.
Molly grabbed a glass of water and told Draco to drink up. It stopped the crying for a moment. Just enough time for Draco to hear Molly tell him to listen to Harry’s heartbeat. A whole lot of pressure on Harry though. His heat had been racing the moment he saw the headline. His breath evened out and Molly gave him a cookie which Draco accepted. His compliance only concerned Harry more.
Molly opened a curtain, in a vain attempt to get some light into the dark and musty house only to see a sea of paparazzi outside and quickly shut it and muttered something about vultures.
The whole Weasley family were softening their complaints about Harry’s relationship after the media articles about them had come out, but they hadn’t actually met Draco yet. Well, Draco as his boyfriend yet. She stood there for a minute, her hands on her hips, before saying “Let's get you both out of this gloomy house. How about a cup of tea?”
Harry pulled Draco up to his feet and walked him to the floo. Draco still hadn’t said a single word. Harry will admit, he didn’t really think about where they were going and he didn’t think Draco really knew what was going on based on the glazed look in his eyes.
Then they were at the Weasleys house and Draco was being pulled into a blanket and promptly shoved into a couch. Leaving Harry standing around like an idiot. “Some boyfriend you are,” Ginny scoffed as she gave Draco another blanket to cover his feet.
Maybe it was the press revealing how horrible Draco’s father was to him. Maybe it was the way they cuddled on the couch all afternoon. Or maybe it was the way Draco looked like a lost puppy, wrapped in blankets and Harry’s oversized sweater with soft hair in directions they had never seen. But they all seemed to accept Draco after that day.
Unfortunately for Draco, that also meant that they saw how full of shit his bratty threats were and never really took him seriously again. From then on he was ‘pretty boy’, ‘sleepy head’, ‘brat’, ‘Harry’s boyfriend’ and (on one occasion which resulted in Molly slapping George across the head) ‘Harry’s bitch’.
A year later, the press was back at it. But it wasn’t in hate. Just gossip after they got married and rumors of children in the future. Luna had officiated the wedding, so they were married in the muggle world, in the wizarding world, and in the afterlife apparently. Luna had stressed the importance of this aspect ceremony quite a bit.
Three weeks after their honeymoon, it was Sunday afternoon at the Weasley’s house watching football. Harry was on the couch with Hermione while the rest of the lot were dissecting the ‘nachos’ Hermione taught Molly to make. Draco would normally join, but he said he had something he needed to do. Harry didn’t think much of it because Draco was always doing things which usually involved another pair of skinny jeans or some stray cat.
Harry was sipping his butterbeer when the door flung open and familiar light stomps could be heard in the living room.
Harry choked on his butterbeer when a menacing voice shouted “YOU!” and the footstep got unnaturally loud.
Draco maneuvered to the front of the couch, raving madness, “Do you have any idea what the bloody chances are?” Draco shoved his finger into Harry’s chest pushing him into the couch. He didn’t get a chance to respond before Draco answered his own question. “0.005%!”
“Do you know how HARD people have to try to get that? HUh! Blood hard! Five out of ten THOUSAND. But you just had to do it in less than 100. Less than 50! Do you know what that percentage is? I did the maths and it’s bloody 2%. In case it's not clear to you, 2% is MUCH greater then 0.005%.”
Draco was pacing around the living room. Seemingly indifferent to the gaggle of Weasley's slowly eating their nachos. “You and your stupid over powered magic cum. You just HAD to beat the odds!”
Draco turned to the fireplace then back to him at lighting speed. “Did you imagine it? Did you just THINK about it then BAM! Done. Did you think, ‘oh what’s one more bloody accomplishment under my belt’.
Draco ran a hand through his hair, anger bringing a pink tint to his cheeks. Harry would say it was cute if he didn’t think he would get into more trouble. “I just… I can’t believe you Harry. What the BLOODY HELL were you thinking? Just you and your stupid powers and your stupid body and your stupid prick and your stupid intuitive magic.” Draco pointed a single perfectly manicured finger at him and yelled, “You asshole! This is all your fault!”. Harry was too stunned to move as Draco stormed out of the house and slammed the door.
Ron chuckled, “Bloody hell mate. What did you do?”
Harry looked over at Ron, “I don’t know?”
Ginny, raised her eyebrows. “There must have been something.”
Harry shook his head, “No. No. There was nothing. I didn’t do anything.”
George chimed in, “Obviously you did something. Out with it now.”
Harry put down his drink, “No really. We had a nice morning. I made crepes, fed the cats, and then came here.”
Hermione’s eyes light up in recognition, “Harry. I think you need to go after him.”
Harry stood up dumbly, “Yeah. Yeah, I need to go.”
George shouted, “Good luck!” As Harry walked out to the apparition spot.
“Draco?” Harry called from the door of their home. He heard a distant muffled groan from their bedroom.
“Kitten?” Harry pushed the door open to reveal his lovely husband face down into a pillow on their bed. He was still wearing his white heeled boots that matched his white blouse and black skinny jeans.
“Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.” Draco muttered into the pillow. Harry sat on the side of the bed next to Draco.
Harry sighed, “I’m an idiot. I know. Could you enlighten me on why I am an idiot?”
He recoiled slightly as a paper was shoved into his face. He grabbed it as Draco’s hand was pulled back into position under the pillow.
It was a paper from Sanit Mungos. Harry looked over Draco and couldn’t see anything visibly wrong. It was an order form from a test.
A pregnancy test.
It was positive.
Thank god. Draco had seriously scared him.
Wait. Holy shit. "You're pregnant?”
Draco rolled over and suddenly his face smacked with the pillow. “Yes. If that wasn’t abundantly clear from the positive test result.”
His grin faltered at the angry tone. This was a good thing. Wasn’t it? They had talked about having children. They both wanted them. But they always assumed they would adopt. Male pregnancies were possible with magic, but they were exciting rare. Probably around 0.005% from their previous conversation. Although calling it a conversation was stretching it. But Draco had never said he would ever want to get pregnant.
“Do you want to keep it?” Harry asked softly.
Draco's spine shot up and he was hit with the pillow again particularly hard. “Of course I want to keep you imbecile. If you think there is a chance in hell that I am getting rid of this baby you have another thing coming for you.”
“Then this is a good thing, isn’t it?”
Draco held the pillow a bit higher. “Of course it is!” He yelled.
“Then why are you mad at me?” Harry raised his hands defensively from the threat of another beating with the pillow.
Draco stood up from the bed and yelled “I don’t know! I just am!” He was pacing now, pillow thankfully abandoned.
Harry felt a grin break out on his face. Ahh, this was something he was familiar with. They had made a lot of progress, but his husband always seemed to default to anger when things got to be a bit too much.
Harry grabbed Draco’s hands once he got close to the bed. “Baby.” He pulled Draco gently next to him on the bed. “This is a good thing. I love you. You know that right?” Draco looked to the floor, giving up on the angry facade. Harry cupped Draco’s cheek to look at him. “ I love you more than the world itself and there isn’t a single thing I wouldn’t do for you and this baby. You know that right?”
Draco nodded as a tear fell from his eyes. “Everyone is going to support you through this. God, you are probably going to have to fend Molly off with a stick once she finds out.”
Draco laughed. “She’s never going to leave me alone again.”
Harry hesitantly pressed a hand over Draco’s stomach. It was as flat as ever, but he still felt some familiar magic.
Harry looked into Draco’s grey eyes. “This is all my fault isn’t it?”
Draco giggled, wiping the tears from his eyes. “Absolutely. You know, most people have to wish the person they are having sex with pregnant to accomplish this.” Harry felt his cheeks flush. Draco raised his eyebrow. “You wished for it, didn’t you?”
“Well, we had just talked about having children in the future. It's just a brief thought about how beautiful you would be if you were, you know, pregnant. I didn’t know, I swear.” Harry stammered.
Draco rolled his eyes. “I figured. You and your stupid overpowered magic.”
Harry gently pushed Draco back onto the bed. “Yup. Me and my stupid magic.” He gently pressed his lips to Draco's, pulling him into a deep kiss.