Chapter 5
Finding Dumbledore is essential but they have to be smart about it. They can’t just stroll around with two Remuses, two Reguluses, and two Siriuses—some of them have to disguise themselves so glamours are cast on Ragged Remus, Rockstar Sirius, and, to their dismay, both Reguluses.
Mary is in charge of the glamours because, frankly, she’s the best at it—and boy, does she have fun.
They’re all disguised in Hogwarts uniforms from different houses, designed to help them blend in.
Remus, now in Hufflepuff robes, looks particularly rough. His uniform is torn and ill-fitted, his hair has been darkened to a deep brown and grown out to his shoulders, with a fringe that constantly falls into his eyes. To top it off, the dark circles under his eyes have been emphasized even more.
“Uh, Mary, love,” Remus says, brushing the hair out of his face, “how am I supposed to see with this mop?”
“You’re misunderstanding, Remus. It’s not about you seeing—it’s about people not seeing you!” she replies with a cheery smile.
“Right.”
She claps her hands together and continues instructing. “You’re Stefan, from Essex. Seventh year, Muggle-born, and you spend all your time in the greenhouse, if you know what I mean. ” She shoots him a wink, “That’s why no one’s ever seen you around.”
Turning to present her work to the group, she steps aside. The reactions are underwhelming.
Nobody looks impressed—except for Original Remus, who is relieved that Ragged Remus now stands no chance of stealing his boyfriend
“What’s up with his face, Mary?” Sirius asks, sounding vaguely disturbed.
“He’s a stoner, Black! Between his sad posture and his weepy eyes, I didn’t have a lot to work with, okay?”
“Cheers,” Remus mutters dryly behind her.
“Well, I think you’ve done a wonderful job, Mary,” Original Remus says, ever the gentleman.
“Thank you, Remus! All right, who’s next?”
Next up is Angry Regulus. His ‘uniform’—if you can even call it that—consists of school trousers paired with a Muggle band T-shirt featuring Jim Morrison’s face. His Gryffindor tie hangs undone around his neck, and the cherry on top--- he’s rocking a buzz cut.
Regulus’s hands fly to his head in horror. “MY HAIR! SHE TOOK MY HAIR!”
Both Siriuses collapse into fits of laughter.
“Language, little brother!” Original Sirius wheezes. “Mary, have I ever told you how much I adore you?”
“Once or twice, but I don’t mind hearing it again,” she says, grinning.
“Well, I do,” Sirius says with a bow.
Mary smirks. “You’re James’s cousin from France—”
“COUSIN?!” Angry Regulus interrupts, outraged.
“Yes, cousin.” Mary snaps, giving him a sharp look.
“Come on, Mary, that’s disgusting,” Soft Regulus chimes in, cringing.
“Oh so now the Noble House of Black is too prudish for a bit of incest?” Marlene teases—something she regrets when Rockstar Sirius wacks her in the arm, Original Sirius tackles her, and both Reguluses—one of them wandless, thank god—send a row of hexes in her direction.
“You’re his cousin,” Mary reiterates firmly. “You’ve finished your own schooling and are visiting to help James prepare for his NEWTs. In your spare time, you play in a band called Record Spinning Backwards .”
“Rock and roll, Reggie!” Rockstar Sirius cheers.
“I will murder you,” Regulus growls.
Soft Regulus is next. He’s placed in Ravenclaw, his robes neat and pristine. His hair is styled immaculately, but his face has undergone the most significant transformation: his forehead sticks out, his eyes are smaller, and his lips are thinner.
“What have you done to my beautiful face?!” he complains, looking at himself in Mary’s compact, desperately trying to push his forehead inwards.
“You’re Christopher,” Mary says patiently. “A scholar taking seven extra classes, leaving you no time to attend student activities—or even eat in the Great Hall.”
“Damn, Reggie, sounds like you’ve got a lot on your plate,” Marlene points out.
“Shut it, McKinnon,” Soft Regulus snaps.
Mary takes a long look at Rockstar Sirius before turning to Original Sirius. “Give him your robes.”
“What?”
“Your robes. Hand them over.”
“Why? Can’t you just glamour his clothes?”
“He’s never worn magic before, Sirius. Christ, he’s never even felt magic on his skin. He’s going to be overwhelmed enough as it is. You’re switching lives—he’s you, and you’re Craig.”
Grumbling, Sirius obeys. Moments later, he’s dressed in Ravenclaw robes, looking a bit pudgier, with a freshly buzzed head.
“Do you still adore her?” Angry Regulus asks smugly.
“Shut up,” Sirius grumbles.
Mary points at Rockstar Sirius. “You’re Sirius fucking Black. You’re brilliant, but always make sure to be an absolute arsehole about it.”
“HEY!” Original Sirius protests.
“That sounds easy enough,” Rockstar Sirius says with a grin.
“Just stick close to James then no one will bat an eye.”
“They’ll probably be too busy buzzing about how Sirius had a glow-up overnight,” Rockstar Sirius says cockily.
“I hate that kid,” Original Sirius mutters. “He’s so annoying.”
“Oh, you think?” Peter deadpans, the meaning flying right over Sirius’s head.
xxx
The common room is empty. So is the corridor. Actually, everywhere is empty. No students, no teachers, no faculty. It’s uncannily quiet.
“Well, if there’s no one around, I’m not wearing this itchy glamour,” Angry Regulus grumbles.
“Too bad you don’t have a wand, then,” Original Sirius quips sassily.
Both Ragged Remus and Rockstar Sirius are completely lost in their surroundings—but for very different reasons.
“THE STAIRS JUST MOVED!” Sirius yells, panic lacing his voice as he repeatedly slaps James’s arm.
“Yeah, they do that,” James replies calmly.
“What do you mean ‘they do that’? Stairs don’t do that!”
“These stairs do,” James says with a shrug, as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.
Original Sirius glares at him. “Look at this idiot,” he mutters to Ragged Remus, but Remus doesn’t seem to be listening.
“Oh!” Ragged Remus suddenly exclaims, his voice full of melancholy. “Do you remember that cupboard?”
“What cupboard?” Sirius asks, caught off guard.
“The broom cupboard,” Remus says wistfully.
Sirius raises a brow. “What about it?”
“That time we—” Remus coughs awkwardly. “Caught Snape making out with that Muggle-born?”
“That doesn’t sound like Snape. That twat hates Muggle-borns.” Marlene cuts in.
Remus stifles a sound somewhere between a sob and a whimper.
“What now?” Regular Remus asks, looking exasperated.
“Nothing. It’s just…” Ragged Remus’s voice cracks as tears begin to spill. “It’s exactly something my Marlene would’ve said.”
“Merlin,” Marlene grumbles, clearly uncomfortable, but she reaches over to pat the weeping man awkwardly on the back.
“Shh, you two!” Lily hisses, holding up a hand. “I hear footsteps.”
They all freeze, trying their best to act natural as the sound of footsteps grows louder.
“Okay,” Lily whispers. “I’ll do the talking. You just stay put, don’t make a sound, and try not to blow our cover.”
She adjusts her uniform, straightens her back, and faces the direction of the sound. The footsteps come closer until, rounding the corner, another Lily Evans appears.
“Oh, you’ve got to be kidding me,” Regulus groans.
Everyone freezes, holding their breath to see what the new Lily will do.
To their surprise, she doesn’t seem fazed at all.
“Hi, guys,” she says with a bright smile. “I know this is all a bit scary, but don’t worry; everything will soon be under control. Would you mind dropping your glamours so I can take inventory of who we’ve got here?” Her voice is calm and professional—her prefect voice.
They all blink at her, including the original Lily.
“Okay, I see you’re still adjusting,” New Lily says cheerfully, and with a quick flick of her wand, she dispels the glamours herself. Scribbling something on a parchment, she looks up and continues, “There’s an assembly in the Great Hall. If all the wizards could just make sure the Muggles don’t get lost, that’d be great! There’s coffee and tea—help yourselves to whatever you like. Oh, and try not to start any fights. We all want to get through this as smoothly as possible, yeah?” She smiles again, clearly unfazed by the chaos.
Finally, Original Lily finds her voice. “I’m sorry, what ? How many are we dealing with here?”
“I’m still working on the numbers,” New Lily replies.
The two Lilys shuffle together, whispering behind their curtains of red hair. When they finish, they share a brief nod before New Lily heads off, leaving Original Lily behind with a practiced, pleasant smile.
“Alright, everyone, follow me, please,” Original Lily says as she starts toward the Great Hall.
“Lils,” James whispers, catching up to her. “What is happening?”
“We’re not the only ones, James,” she replies quietly.
“How many are there? Are there duplicates of all of us, or just the ones we’ve already seen?”
“I don’t know,” she says, glancing around nervously. “But I think this is way bigger than we thought.”
They push open the doors to the Great Hall, and the sight inside leaves them stunned.
The hall is buzzing with activity—except it’s the same people, over and over again. It’s absolute chaos.
All around people are running across the room to embrace confused duplicates of their friends. In one corner, a large group is sobbing uncontrollably. Spells and curses fly in every direction. A gang of Bartys, several Reguluses, a few Dorcases, and one massive, muscled Peter are locked in a brawl. Meanwhile, new people keep apparating into the room by the second.
At the far end of the Hall, on the platform, a cluster of Lilys are desperately trying to regain control.
“What the—” Rockstar Sirius begins but trails off, more focused on the floating candles, then the many clones of himself.
They’re all speechless.
“Lily?” Original Remus asks.
“Yup, just give me a second,” she says, sounding just as overwhelmed as they all feel.
“Okay, huddle up,” James says, and they all move closer.
“We can’t split up,” he declares at the same time as Angry Regulus says, “We should split up.”
“What? No! We can’t split up—that’s insane!” James protests.
“We need to explore, figure out what’s going on,” Angry Regulus insists.
“Are you just saying that as an excuse to look for your James?” Soft Regulus asks, raising an eyebrow.
“What? No!”
They all stare at him, deadpan.
“Okay, yeah, but shut up—I miss my boyfriend,” he sulks.
“Me too,” Ragged Remus chimes in, making Original Remus shuffle a bit closer to Original Sirius.
“We need a mark—” Lily begins.
“I have plenty of those,” Angry Regulus mutters, but he quiets down when she sends him a pointed look.
“Something to recognize each other by,” she clarifies.
“I have some chocolate in my pocket,” Remus offers. “We could each take a chocolate frog, and if we run into someone who can show us a frog, they’re one of us.”
“Right, like that’s going to work,” Rockstar Sirius says sarcastically.
They all turn to stare at him, surprised.
“Oh, come on! I don’t even know what a chocolate frog is, but I bet every single Moony in here has at least one in their pocket.”
They nod, reluctantly agreeing.
“Here, give me your wrists,” Peter says, pulling out a quill and transfiguring it into a red marker. He draws a large X on each of their wrists, looking visibly nervous when he gets to Angry Regulus, whose Dark Mark is peeking out.
“Okay, you’re marked. Now, scurry off!” Peter says.
“That was pretty good thinking, Pete,” James says, clapping him on the back.
“Cheers. I was worried the evil Regulus would kill someone else if he didn’t find his James soon,” Peter replies earnestly, eyes wide.
“But he doesn’t even have a wand,” James counters.
“As if he’d need one.” Peter says, shuddering.
xxx
“Moons, you’re coming with me,” Sirius says, grabbing Original Remus by the arm.
“Where are we going?” Remus asks.
“Just come on! I don’t want to lose you in all this chaos.”
“Well, I like the sound of that.”
The two boys push into the sea of people, holding on tightly to each other’s hands.
“This is the weirdest thing I’ve ever experienced,” Remus mutters as they pass a Marlene who is heavily making out with a Dorcas Meadows.
He must be here somewhere .
“When did that happen?” Remus asks, nodding toward them.
“Not our business, Moons. Maybe it’s not even happening. We don’t know the laws of this existence,” Sirius replies, eyes scanning the crowd.
Come on, asshole. Where are you hiding?
“Sirius, slow down,” Remus says as Sirius pulls him along.
Then Sirius spots him. Standing against the wall, looking as though this entire situation is beneath him.
“Come on!” Sirius says, hurrying toward him, his eyes fixed to make sure he doesn’t lose him. “Regulus!” he shouts when he’s close enough.
Regulus looks him up and down before turning his head away.
Oh yeah. It’s definitely him.
“Oi, Regulus!” Sirius says again, now standing in front of him.
“Sirius,” Regulus greets, sounding thoroughly unenthusiastic as he stares at something else. Sirius follows his gaze to a Barty Crouch Jr. across the room.
“You’re my brother!” Sirius blurts out.
Regulus rolls his eyes. “You’d think so.”
“No, I mean, all the Reguluses here are my brothers in some way, but you are my actual brother. From this universe.”
“No.”
“What do you mean ‘no’? Yes! I know we don’t talk because you’re a traitorous asshole, but you’re my traito—”
“I’m going to stop you there before you embarrass yourself,” Regulus interrupts. “I’m not your brother. So whatever redemption arc you’re going for—you’ve got the wrong me.”
A loud yelp from Remus’s voice interrupts them both. They turn to see Ragged Remus cornered by a taller, broader Sirius in a half-unbuttoned black satin shirt and tight trousers with an obvious bulge.
“What do we have here?” the Handsome Sirius says suggestively, leaning toward Remus.
Sirius feels his insides boiling over. He pushes between them, glaring up at the more handsome version of himself.
“What do you think you’re doing?” he demands.
“Just about to show Remus here a good time,” Handsome Sirius smirks, taking a step closer.
“Moony doesn’t need a good time! He didn’t ask for a good time!” Original Sirius snaps, turning to Remus. “Did you?”
Remus, blushing furiously, stammers, “Huh? No, no! I didn’t!”
“I think he likes it,” Handsome Sirius says, leaning in again. “And what about you? Do you like it?” he asks, his tone flirtatious.
Sirius is stunned, speechless. Could it really be? Is he being flirted with by himself? And why is he… kind of into it ?
“What are you going to do about it, big boy?” Handsome Sirius taunts.
“I—I…” Sirius stammers.
Handsome Sirius clicks his tongue. “Naughty boy,” he says, turning back to Remus.
This snaps Sirius out of his trance. His anger surges.
“LEAVE!” Sirius barks.
Handsome Sirius smirks, giving a wink and a salute before sauntering off into the crowd, hips swaying dramatically.
“That was the most disgusting thing I have ever seen,” another Sirius says.
Sirius snaps his head around to where Regulus was standing finding a Sirius in Slytherin robes beside him.
“Who the fuck are you?” Original Sirius demands.
“That’s my brother,” Regulus says, looking up at the Slytherin Sirius with what seems like admiration.
“I’m repulsed that we’re the same,” Slytherin Sirius says coolly.
“You’re not the same,” Regulus replies. Then he turns to Original Sirius and locks eyes with him. “My brother is not a fucking queer.”
xxx
“Do you have a son?” James asks frantically, stopping another James walking by.
“No. Do you have a son?” the other James asks back, matching his energy.
“No.” James sighs sadly.
The other James continues on his way without another word.
After Ragged Remus’ story, James can’t stop thinking about his future kid. He is determined to find a version of himself that can tell him about his son.
“Prongs, I don’t know about all this,” Peter pipes up nervously. “Isn’t there something about how you’re not supposed to know what happens to you in the future?”
“Well, this isn’t necessarily the future—Do you have a son?” James cuts himself off to interrogate yet another James passing by.
This James shakes his head without even slowing down.
“Are you not curious, Wormy?” James asks, turning to Peter.
Peter just shrugs.
James stares at him, puzzled, before shaking his head. “Besides, do you see what’s happening here? I doubt that knowing our futures is the main thing to worry about right now.”
“Hi, Pads!” Peter calls out to a Sirius passing by, who gives him a quick nod but doesn’t stop.
“That was weird. He didn’t even say anything,” Peter comments.
“That’s because he wasn’t our Sirius,” James says, scanning the room for more versions of himself.
“What do you mean? He had a red X,” Peter points out.
“Hm, I guess we’re not the only ones who came up with that idea,” James muses.
“But how can you know that wasn’t him?”
“I can recognize him.”
“But they all look the same… they’re literally the same person!” Peter protests.
James shrugs, his eyes still searching the crowd. “Not to me. I can tell them apart.”
A very hyper Marlene bumps into them, spinning around with a grin.
“Hi, lads! Hope you’re not evil because I’m in such a good mood right now!”
“We’re not,” Peter says quickly, raising his arms to show off the red Xs.
“Oh, wait!” Marlene mimics the gesture, showing off her own X.
“Are we—are you—” Peter starts to ask.
“James saw Mary naked this morning!” Marlene blurts out, cutting him off.
James freezes, his face flushing crimson.
“Marls!” Peter exclaims.
“I have to tell you the best thing!” Marlene barrels ahead, clearly unbothered by James’s embarrassment. “Remember when Sirius had to get psycho Regulus to hand over his wand?”
Both boys nod cautiously.
“Well,” Marlene continues, eyes gleaming, “he threatened him with October 10th, right? And both Reguluses had a reaction to that. So I thought, hmm, I wonder how many Reguluses have had this experience. And guess what? It turns out it’s all of them!” She claps her hands together excitedly. “Now I can get them to do anything for me!”
“But you don’t even know the story,” James points out, skeptical.
“Doesn’t matter. Look!” Marlene grabs the arm of a passing Regulus, adopting a dead-serious tone. “Get me a butterbeer.”
Regulus glares at her, sneering. “Get it yourself, mudblood.”
Marlene doesn’t even flinch. “Get it, or I’ll tell everyone what happened on October 10th when you were thirteen.” Her eyes narrow menacingly.
Regulus falters, visibly panicked, before grumbling under his breath and conjuring a butterbeer. He thrusts it at her, muttering something that sounds vaguely threatening under his breath.
“SEE!” Marlene beams, holding up the butterbeer like a trophy. “It’s awesome!”
“That’s… one way to put it,” James says, grimacing as Regulus storms off.
xxx
Mary is upset. Of course she is—it’s an upsetting situation. As a child, she’d always dreamt of having a clone. A version of herself that could do all her chores while she ran, drew, and played. But now, standing in front of maybe a hundred different versions of herself—more emerging by the minute—it’s nothing like she’d imagined.
Why her?
She looks around at the many versions of her friends, catching up with each other and with themselves. Marlenes are laughing together, Lilys are working tirelessly everywhere to figure it all out, and an army of Jameses has gathered in a corner, happily sharing stories about how wonderful their child is.
Her gaze lands on the version of herself that has just Apparated in front of her—a Mary with the same glazed-over look in her eyes. She knows, even before speaking to her, that this one is a bad apple.
“You’re me,” the new Mary stammers. “But who are all these people? And where am I?”
Mary doesn’t respond, instead sighs and turns away. She has to get out of here. She needs air.
Pushing through the crowd, she bursts out of the Great Hall, stumbling into the open air.
She takes a deep breath, filling her lungs, then screams at the top of her voice, “FUUUCK!”
It comes from deep in her chest, and she does feel a little better afterward.
“Mary?” a voice calls softly behind her.
She spins around, startled.
“Dorcas?” she blurts, surprised and slightly embarrassed.
“Oh, Mary, what’s happened?” Dorcas hurries toward her, concern written all over her face.
“No, no, I’m fine!” Mary insists quickly.
“Mary, you’re crying. Come on, you can tell me.”
A hand flies up to her cheek, and Dorcas is right—she is crying.
“Why? We’re not friends.” She asks skeptically.
Dorcas chuckles gently. “Maybe not in your universe, but in mine, we are.”
Mary huffs, unconvinced.
“No, it’s true,” Dorcas continues, her tone warm. “We became friends during third year when—”
“Stop!” Mary cuts her off, voice sharp.
Dorcas looks taken aback, her expression shocked.
“I’m sorry,” Mary says, her voice trembling. “It’s just... I don’t need to know whatever horrible thing happened in your universe to make me obliviate myself.”
At this, Dorcas’s expression shifts from shock to something softer, sadder. “What?” she asks quietly.
Mary can’t hold back the tears anymore. “I’ve met so many of them,” she cries. “They’re all blank and empty. Every good thing that’s ever happened to me is erased. They don’t know our friends. They don’t know about magic! It’s like they’re all dead inside.” She takes a shaky breath.
“I don’t want to be dead inside,” she adds, her voice small.
“Oh, my sweet girl,” Dorcas murmurs, pulling Mary into a hug.
It surprises Mary—she’s not used to this kind of closeness with Dorcas—but it feels nice to be held.
They stay like that for a while, Mary sobbing softly as Dorcas strokes her hair. Eventually, Mary sits up straighter, her tears subsiding.
“Thank you,” she sniffles. “That was a nice thing to do.”
Dorcas smiles gently. “You might not know me very well, but you should know that I care for you deeply—all versions of you, not just my own.”
Mary returns a small, grateful smile.
“And, if it helps,” Dorcas adds, her tone lightening, “I’m having a few problems with the other me s too.”
“Really?” Mary asks, curiosity piqued.
“Yeah! I’m so lucky I come from a universe without war. Everyone pretty much gets along, and nothing truly terrible has ever happened to me. The worst thing was when Marlene disliked me.”
Mary gives a tiny smile.
“That’s a privilege—I know that now,” Dorcas says, her tone turning more serious. “A lot of me’s have been through hell, and they’re holding a massive grudge against those of us who haven’t. They hate us for not enduring the same amount of trauma, and... I’m not gonna lie, it’s pretty hard.”
“I’m sorry,” Mary says sincerely. “That sounds awful.” She hesitates, then adds, “Tell me more about this warless universe.”
“I will,” Dorcas promises. “But I think someone’s here to talk to you.”
She gestures to a Lily slowly approaching.
Dorcas stands, giving Mary’s hand a reassuring pad before stepping away. As she passes Lily, she gives her a loving squeeze on the arm.
“Hi, Mary,” Lily says as she sits down next to her.
“Hi, Lils,” Mary replies with a small smile. “Are you my Lily?” she asks, showing off the red X on her wrist.
Lily glances at her own wrist before holding it up so Mary can see.
No red X.
“It doesn’t appear so,” she says with a sheepish smile.
“That’s okay,” Mary says, trying to mask her disappointment. She misses her real friends.
“I’ve been looking for you,” Lily says, staring straight ahead. “Or, not you exactly, but the version of you that’s—well—you know—mine.”
“I know,” Mary nods, also staring straight ahead.
“I saw you run out here and thought maybe you were the one I was looking for.”
“Sorry to disappoint,” Mary offers.
“Don’t apologize,” Lily says, turning to look at her with a furrowed brow. “It’s just nice to talk to someone who rec—” She trails off.
“It’s okay, you can say it. Recognises you, right?” Mary finishes for her.
Lily nods.
Mary sighs into her hands. “I don’t know why it’s like this!” she says, her words muffled by her palms. She looks up at Lily, her expression desperate.
“Why is it only me that did that? And why did I do it in so many universes?”
Lily is quiet for a moment. “Do you want to know?”
“You know?” Mary’s eyes widen.
“Yeah... I ran into a Remus who told me.”
Mary hesitates.
Does she want to know? What if it’s awful and changes her life forever? Then again, if she knows, maybe she can keep it from happening in this universe.
“Yeah,” she finally nods. “I think I want to know.”
“Okay,” Lily mumbles. “Uh... where to start... well, essentially, a lot of awful, awful stuff happens during the war, and—uh—basically everyone dies.” Lily trails off.
Mary feels her stomach drop. She feels sick. It’s her worst fear since the war began, and now she’s learning it happens in multiple universes. She closes her eyes, as if that will make the information more bearable.
“Keep going,” she orders.
Lily hesitates but continues. “So, after Halloween ‘81, it’s only you and Remus left.”
Mary’s eyes fly open. “ONLY US? So when you said everyone dies, you meant everyone ?”
“Pretty much, yeah.” Lily’s voice is thick with emotion.
“Okay…” Mary swallows and nods, signaling for Lily to continue.
“And Remus handles it... well, not great. Because of this thing with Sirius—you don’t need to know about that.”
“Sirius. Got it.”
“Oh, yeah, I forgot. They’re dating in a lot of universes.”
“Yeah, in mine too.”
“Alright,” Lily nods. “So, anyway, Remus kind of goes off the rails, leaving only you. And I guess you decide—”
“—that the good memories aren’t enough to outweigh the bad ones,” Mary finishes for her.
Lily nods.
Mary feels the tears spill over again. “That just doesn’t sound like me, you know? I can’t see myself doing that.”
“I know,” Lily says softly. “It doesn’t sound like the you I know either.”
The two girls lock eyes.
“Tell me about your universe,” Mary asks after a moment.
Lily smiles. It’s the same smile Mary knows so well from her own Lily—it’s comforting and warms her insides.
“Well... we’re together, for a start,” Lily says.
Mary blinks in surprise. “Like, together together?”
“Yeah. We were friends for a long time, but then one day during fifth year, you just... kissed me.”
“Is that so?” Mary asks, entranced by the look of love and longing that only speaking of a lover can bring.
“That’s so,” Lily says softly, not breaking eye contact. “I was shocked at first, so I froze—which made you think you’d done something wrong.” Lily smiles, shaking her head slightly before meeting Mary’s gaze again. “We didn’t speak for a few weeks, and everything was awful. But then I finally grew some courage and told you I was in love with you—and that I was sorry. We’ve basically been together ever since.”
She smiles warmly.
This Lily looks exactly like the one Mary knows and loves—the same tiny brown speck in her left eye, the same freckles, the same smile. How can speaking to a stranger feel so much like speaking to a friend?
Then, slowly, Lily leans in and kisses her.
Mary feels something break inside her.
Oh.
It’s not that she minds the kiss. Hell, she’s made out with Marls and Lily while drunk on multiple occasions.
No, it’s the realization that this isn’t her Lily. Her Lily would never do something like this in a situation like this.
Oh, how Mary wishes she were with her own Lily.
As their lips part, she can tell that this Lily feels the same.
“I’m sorry,” Lily whispers.
“No, no, don’t be,” Mary says weakly. “It was... nice.”
“No, it was all wrong. I misread the situation,” Lily says, her voice heavy with regret.
Mary doesn’t know what to say, so she simply slings an arm around Lily.
“Let’s go back inside. I’ll help you find the real me, yeah?” Mary offers.
“Yeah, I’d like that,” Lily says softly.
The two girls get up, and together they head back inside, Mary’s arm still around Lily’s shoulders.
xxx
“Where the fuck is she?” Regulus mutters.
“I don’t know?” Evan replies as he yanks back a massive tapestry—revealing two Bartys making out.
“Oh, that’s disturbing,” Regulus says, grimacing.
“That’s our Barty,” Evan counters, a shocked grin spreading across his face.
“That’s not our Barty. Our Barty would never do something like that.”
“What are you on about? That’s exactly something our Barty would do!”
“Ew, Ev, you’ve got to give him a little more credit than that!”
“Come on, Reg. That’s literally him.”
They stand there, heads close together, watching the scene unfold—Evan looking thoroughly amused, Regulus thoroughly disgusted.
Then one of the Bartys turns to face them. “Enjoying the show, lads?” he asks with a grin.
Shit.
Regulus feels heat rushing to his cheeks. “We’re leaving. Come on, Evan,” he snaps, reaching for Evan’s wrist to drag him away.
“Nah, ah, ah, hold on.” Evan shrugs him off and steps forward, squaring up to the Bartys. “One of you is our Barty, right? And my money’s on you.” He points to the one who had addressed them.
The Barty smirks and bows theatrically. “You got me!”
Then he jogs the two meters over to them and casually swings an arm around Evan.
Weird. But hardly the weirdest thing that’s happened all day.
Regulus is still growing accustomed to the situation. Who could blame him? It’s uncomfortable, to say the least. First, there’s the fact that he’s surrounded by hundreds of clones of his friends—and, more annoyingly, his brother and his friends . Then there are the countless versions of himself walking around. The state of them worries him. He’d always imagined that in another universe, things would be different—but in far too many, they aren’t. They seem just as depressed as he’s felt all his life. And if they’re not sad, they’re fucking psychotic.
Regulus doesn’t want to be like that. Powerful, sure. But not if the price is his mind and sense of reason.
What concerns him the most—the thing that gnaws at his insides, the thought he’s trying so hard to push away—is the lack of Reguluses over the age of 18. There are a few from happy universes without war and hate—and in those, he’s always married to Potter. Insane . And there are a few other adult versions of him, but they’re the unhinged ones, the ones who’ve clearly lost their grip on reality, and are—if you ask Regulus—doing way too much!
Why is he surrounded by hundreds of adult Siriuses, Remuses, and Bartys, while there’s such a stark absence of adult Reguluses? Was he doomed to die young? The thought sends a shiver down his spine.
“I just don’t understand!” Evan complains beside him. The Barty they’ve picked up still has his arm draped around Evan, nodding in an exaggeratedly understanding manner.
“I mean, you always have a brother, right?” Evan says, turning to face Regulus.
“We don’t know that, Evan,” he replies flatly.
“I think we do! Look around, for Merlin’s sake. This place is crowded with Black brother duos! No—they don’t always get along, and yes—I can see how that might be a little difficult for you—”
“It’s not difficult for me! I don’t care about Sirius.”
Barty and Evan exchange a look.
Regulus chooses to ignore it.
Then they both turn and send him a look.
Idiots.
“Sure,” Evan says dryly, “but at least you have a brother! I’ve talked to so many versions of myself, and I swear it’s a 50/50 toss of a coin whether Panda is my sister or not. Why is that? And why isn’t she here? Not even one little Pandora to be found!”
He stops abruptly, grabbing the arm of an Evan passing by.
“Have you seen Pandora?” he asks pointedly.
“No, I can’t find her anywhere, but if you find her, keep your hands to yourself—she’s my girlfriend.” the other Evan replies.
Evan’s face twists into pure disgust, and before anyone can react, he sends a hex at the other Evan.
Regulus grimaces, unable to stop himself. That’s foul .
“That must be so hard,” Barty says, his tone overly sincere. “Do you need a hug?”
Evan stops dead in his tracks and looks at him.
“No.”
“It’s okay if you do,” Barty adds earnestly.
Evan turns to Regulus. “I don’t think this one is ours,” he says.
“Told you,” Regulus says, then turns to Barty with a withering look. “Why are you lying about being our Barty?”
“I’m in love with Evan,” Barty replies casually.
“ WHAT? ” Evan sputters, while Regulus groans and pinches the bridge of his nose.
“What the fuck is up with the sheer number of queers here right now?” Regulus sighs.
“ WHAT DO YOU MEAN? ” Evan yells, his voice cracking.
Barty just shrugs. “I love you.”
“You don’t love him, ” Regulus interrupts, exasperated. “You love an Evan, not this Evan.”
“Well, I couldn’t find my own,” Barty says with a smirk, “so I thought I’d just get a new one.”
Evan stands there, jaw slack, utterly speechless.
Regulus turns back to Barty, deadpan. “Leave.”
Barty grins, leans in to kiss Evan on the cheek, and then turns on his heel, vanishing into the crowd like it’s the most normal thing in the world.
Evan looks even more shocked—if that’s somehow possible.
“I hate this day,” Regulus mutters under his breath.
xxx
Lily needs to keep her head cold—stay focused on the task. She has a job to do, a problem to solve, and she’s locked in. She even has a large group of people to figure it out with, all just as competent and concentrated as she is because, well, they’re her .
And that, it turns out, is part of the problem.
It’s hard to focus on solving the mystery of their situation when she has access to endless information about her life—how it will be, how it is somewhere else, or how it could have been . Even for Lily, it’s hard not to take the bait.
At least she’s trying not to indulge—more than what can be said for the rest of this assembly.
Still, it isn’t purely selfish curiosity that drives her; her heart warms at the thought of her son—Harry. She can’t help but ask about him. And then there’s Petunia. Lily has to know: is there a universe where they’re close again? The thought of a world where they’re as inseparable as when they were kids is a great comfort, though it breaks her heart to hear of the many places where they’re as estranged as in her own.
She finds a great deal of humor in this situation as well—she’s lost count of the ways her best friends are paired up in other universes. There’s even one where she’s with Barty Crouch Jr. —if you can believe it. It’s a Muggle universe, and apparently, that Barty has been running around the Great Hall with a knife all day, stabbing multiple Jameses out of pure spite and jealousy. Over her !
But it’s not just about indulgence. She makes sure to ask questions about the war. Maybe they can learn from each other. Maybe they can avoid some of the terrible, horrible things that seem inevitable.
The magical Lilys have started working together on a war manual to bring back home—if they ever figure out how to get back. The Muggle Lilys, meanwhile, aren’t much help with that. They’re too busy learning about the magical world, wide-eyed and hungry for answers. Lily remembers how she felt when she first got her Hogwarts letter and leaves them to it. That hunger can only be satisfied with time.
Still, no matter the reason, it’s hard to stay on track.
“I have an idea!” a Lily pants, pushing through the crowd with bright eyes. “We’ll do an open mic!”
“An open mic?” another Lily asks skeptically.
“Yeah! We’re not figuring this out on our own because there are so many things we haven’t even thought to ask! We need input. So, we’ll conjure a microphone and let people speak.”
“It’s a good idea, but we need it to be organized,” one of them points out.
The Lilys nod in agreement, deciding that the Lily who belongs to this universe should introduce the idea. Another Lily has the brilliant idea to cast a shield in front of the microphone—just in case.
And that’s how Lily Evans ends up standing in front of hundreds of different versions of her friends, tapping a microphone and asking for their attention.
“Excuse me, everyone,” she says, wincing as the microphone gives a sharp feedback squeal.
The chatter dies down, and all eyes turn to her.
Shit.
Public speaking has never been her forte. But this is bigger than feeling shy.
She clears her throat. “Hi all... hi.”
Get it together, Lily!
“So—” she begins, but the microphone screeches again, a piercing sound that makes everyone flinch. Lily feels a wave of dizziness, her knees suddenly untrustworthy.
Come on! Speak! Everyone is waiting.
She swallows hard and steps closer to the microphone, scanning the room with wide eyes. That’s when she sees him.
He can’t be more than twelve years old, and there are no other children here. Yet, there he is—her best friend, shy as the day she met him.
Oh, Remus.
Her heart aches. She remembers the times she’d have panic attacks in the library and he’d sit with her, never trying to make her stop crying, just there . Sometimes he’d give her a piece of chocolate. Later, when they were older, he’d hold her hand or put an arm around her.
She blinks back tears. I’ll help him get home. I have to.
Taking a deep breath, she straightens up.
“Hi, everyone,” she says, her voice steadier this time. “We Lilys would like to suggest an open mic. That way, we can gather all the information we have and try to figure out how to get this sorted out.”
A buzz of chatter breaks out in the crowd. She thinks it sounds like agreement.
“All in favor, raise a hand,” she calls.
A sea of hands shoots up.
That wasn’t so hard, was it?
“Great! If you have any information to share, please form a line over there.”
A flood of people hurries to get in line.
“Please speak directly into the microphone when it’s your turn!” Lily demonstrates, holding up the mic.
For the first time today, she feels like they might actually make some progress.