State Of Grace

As Horace Slughorn did his speech (more of an excuse to hear his own voice than to actually say anything useful, really), Marlene stared cautiously at Sirius and Regulus, who had resigned themselves to sitting side by side, pointedly avoiding each other’s gaze. Marlene prefered not to interrupt such a private situation, so she quickly set her eyes on her plate, though it wasn’t long until they diverted to look at Dorcas, instead.

Marlene hated to admit it, but the suit they were wearing was definitely working for her, to say the least. Honestly, how was she expected not to stare? The other people in the room were certainly not holding themselves back, so why should she? Plus, it was entirely from an objective point of view. It wasn’t Marlene who thought that Dorcas’ skin looked downright edible under the warm light, or that their parted lips were becoming more inviting by the second, no. That was just her common sense, really. Marlene didn’t think Dorcas was beautiful, she just knew it, and there was nothing to be done about the fact, other than accept it. That was all.

So, when it was finally permitted to them to fill their plates up with all the delicacies that fit in them, Marlene was not looking at Dorcas’ hands or mouth in the corner of her eyes, because her so-called beauty was a fact that didn’t need acknowledgement on Marlene’s part. On the contrary, in fact; it was something Marlene was rather set on ignoring (the fact that she was completely and utterly failing at doing so shall be overlooked, for her sake).

As the five of them ate in uncomfortable silence, Marlene stole another glance at Dorcas, seeing them blink quite oddly. With her fork paused halfway to her mouth, Marlene turned to see it better, arguing that Dorcas was certainly more preoccupied with whatever she was doing to look at her.

After a few more seconds of observation, Marlene came to the only conclusion possible: she was speaking in morse code. 

To confirm her suspicions, Marlene turned to where Dorcas was looking, and saw Regulus doing pretty much the same thing. Freaky.

Honestly, they looked possessed, but Marlene was positive that they were communicating via long and short blinks.

She remembered her mother tried to teach her morse code once, when she was younger, but Marlene insisted that it was a waste of time, and that she’d never need it in a realistic setting, so the only thing she’d retained after all that time was how to say S.O.S.

She was quickly starting to regret her decision, trying hopelessly to make sense of what they were saying.

She looked at Sirius, who had also noticed the other two. Marlene raised an eyebrow, a silent way to ask “do you know what they’re saying?”, though it wasn’t nearly as effective as being able to carry a whole conversation with only their eyes. Sirius shrugged, shaking his head miserably.

In a moment of bravery, tired of seeing them “talk” smugly with the knowledge that no one else could understand them, Marlene kicked Dorcas’ leg with her pointed heel, making them wince and rip her eyes away from Regulus, glaring at Marlene fiercely.

“Are you quite finished?” Marlene asked harshly, glaring right back.

“Actually, we weren’t.” Dorcas replied, stepping on Marlene’s foot with strength that required her to basically get out of their seat.

Marlene scoffed, putting her free foot on top of Dorcas’ with all her might.

“Why do you have to make everything a bloody competition, McKinnon?” Dorcas rolled their eyes, but put her last foot on top of Marlene’s nonetheless. “There,” she said, “I won. What’s new?” They smirked, and Marlene might’ve done something if she wasn’t so entranced by it.

“Enjoy the only victory you’ll ever get, Meadowes.” Marlene retorted, coming to her senses.

“Oh, really?” Dorcas said, leaning over until their faces were less than half a metre apart. It made their shirt fall down to gravity’s will, revealing skin that Marlene had never seen, and she could even feel their every breath from their proximity. “‘Cause I have it on good authority that these seats were meticulously arranged by Slughorn himself and, as you may have noticed already, McKinnon, I’m sitting closer to him than you are.” She smiled, and then she winked. Why would she do that to Marlene? Seriously, she was going to have to kill them.

Marlene was too occupied with discreetly taking in every corner of Dorcas’ face to come up with a witty reply, so she quickly muttered a “shut up” that was entirely pitiful.

“You know,” Dorcas started, voice slow, “I understand that I’m really irresistible, and you’re helplessly and irrevocably in love with me, but I think the ogling is a bit much, Marlene.” They whispered, sending shivers down Marlene’s spine. They’d never called her by her first name. The way it sounded on her tongue made her feel some type of way (disgust, she told herself).

“Don’t flatter yourself.” Marlene replied, standing even closer to her rival. “I was simply wondering how much time it would take for my eyes to explode after seeing your hideous face.”

“Ooh, sick burn.” Dorcas said sarcastically. “Where’d you hear that first, preschool?”

“Yeah, ‘cause other kids actually wanted to talk to me.” She retorted. “How many friends have you got even now, hm?” It was probably a low blow, but Marlene didn’t care.

“Enough to beat your ass.” Dorcas said simply, and Marlene noticed how Regulus and Pandora had straightened up on their seats, ready to jump to Dorcas’ defence.

Marlene looked at Sirius for backup, but he was quite busy playing with his food and pointedly avoiding the conversation (and, more importantly, his brother on the seat next to him). She sighed.

“Why don’t you go fuck yourself, Meadowes?”

“Oh, I’m sure you’d be more than happy to do that for me.” Dorcas grinned, and Marlene rolled her eyes.

“Are we all enjoying ourselves tonight?”, came Slughorn’s voice from behind them, and Marlene felt a sweaty hand settle down on her bare shoulder. She had to fight the urge to swat it away. His left hand was on Dorcas’ shoulder, who looked just as uncomfortable as Marlene felt.

“Certainly, professor.” Dorcas smiled widely. 

“Well, I should hope so. I specifically placed you two together because I think you’d make a wonderful team.”

“Oh, yeah, Marlene and I were just talking about that.” Dorcas kept her fake smile, teeth and all, plastered on her face, and placed a hand on top of Marlene’s thigh.

A touch so subtle it could have gone unnoticed, really, but it didn’t. Marlene felt it, alright.

“Yes, such interesting conversation. Quite… insightful.” Marlene agreed, smiling against her will.

“I’m sure.” Slughorn said, pleased with himself. “What about the Blacks, eh? Are you two having fun?”

It was very obvious they weren’t, surely even dumb old Slughorn could tell, but Regulus quickly changed his demeanor.

“How could we not be, professor? Quite the party you’ve got going on, huh?” He said, in a voice much too sweet to be his own. 

“Well, anything for my best and brightest.” Slughorn smiled. Marlene turned to look at Sirius at that, knowing that he was anything but applied in class, but the boy was, once again, not looking at her.

Marlene wanted to go over there and hug him, or shake him, or give him an inspiring pep talk. Anything to get him out of his worried daze.

Slughorn rambled on for a few more minutes before moving on to another section, earning a collective relieved sigh from all of them. Finally, something they could all agree on.

Marlene nibbled on a pastry for a full eight seconds until the silence was unbearable, so she stood up abruptly, rounding up the table to end up at Sirius’ side.

“Get up, Black.” Marlene urged him, and almost cackled when she saw Regulus turn to look at her for a split second.

Sirius looked at her questioningly, but Marlene just crossed her arms and waited for him to stand up and follow her.

When he did, she took him to a pretty much secluded corner, away from prying eyes (and away from his brother, obviously).

“What?” Sirius asked, still not quite there.

“I just… I reckoned you’d want to get away from there, y’know?” Marlene said, unsure all of a sudden.

“I…” Sirius started, losing himself in thought. “I guess I did, mostly. Thanks.”

“Do you wanna talk about it, maybe?” Marlene offered, though Sirius rarely took her up on it.

“I just- I wish he could see that I didn’t leave him, I didn’t want to, but I had to get out of there. I left my mother, and my father, and that nightmare of a house, but I never wanted to leave him.” He explained, teary-eyed.

“I’m sure if you tried to explain that to him, maybe-”

“No. He wouldn’t understand. He’d ask me why I didn’t just tell him, or take him with me, if I didn’t want to leave him behind, and he’d be right. I didn’t do any of those things, but it wasn’t that I wanted him to stay back there, I just… It was a spur of the moment thing, I didn’t really have much time to think about it. I just knew that if I went to tell Regulus about my plans, our parents would have found out, and I never would have gotten out of there. Maybe it was selfish, honestly, but it seemed like the only option at the time.”

“Sirius…” Marlene started, feeling herself get emotional, too. He’d never been that open with her before. “That wasn’t you being selfish, honey, you were just trying to survive. If it’s anyone’s fault, it’s your parents’.” She assured him, putting a hand on his shoulder comfortingly. “Regulus is not stupid, I’m sure of that, so he’d probably understand. Maybe not at first, but… with time, perhaps you two would be able to sort things out.”

“Yeah, well, I’ll be lucky if he even listens to two words I’m trying to say.” Sirius chuckled humorlessly. “Honestly, he’s even more stubborn than me, and that’s saying something.”

“I’ll cover his mouth with tape if I have to. Just say the word, I’m fairly certain that Filch has some in his office.” Marlene smiled, and Sirius laughed a bit.

“I’ll keep that in mind. But, probably not tonight. The time’s not right yet.” Sirius said, and Marlene nodded.

“D’you wanna go back there?” She asked tentatively.

“I guess we have to. I heard there’s going to be coulant for dessert. Oh, and don’t think I’m not going to tell Mary about how you were looking at Dorcas.” Sirius grinned, his eyes sparkling. If that’s what it took, Marlene could handle a few comments from Mary.

“Like hell you are.” She said nonetheless, shoving Sirius slightly. She had a reputation to maintain.

As they came closer to their seats, Marlene saw Dorcas, Pandora, and Regulus huddled up, talking in hushed voices. Honestly, it wouldn’t surprise Marlene if they were conspiring against her and Sirius.

Marlene cleared her throat loudly as she sat down, making the three of them break apart, falling silent. Sirius snickered a bit.

They all fell back into their usual routine, eating and avoiding each other’s eyes in silence, though there wasn’t much to snack on at the moment, because the plates had already disappeared, making them wait a little for their dessert.

They did, in fact, have coulant. Marlene had tried it on a few occasions, and it was good, but Sirius absolutely adored the dish.

Marlene teased him for being so posh, but Sirius stood his ground and affirmed that it was the best dessert and chocolatey treat to ever grace the face of the Earth.

Marlene had never agreed with that statement but, as they all dug in, watching the melted chocolate drip down, she had to admit it was quite a great experience.

Once Dorcas, upon trying it, had released what was honestly a sinful moan, Marlene decided the coulant had earned itself a few extra points (again, from a completely objective, I-can-see-how-someone-who-isn’t-me-would-appreciate-this, point of view, of course).

Sirius kicked her leg and wiggled his eyebrows after seeing Marlene’s reaction, mouthing “Mary’s gonna love this” with a shit-eating grin on his face.

Marlene stuck her middle finger up in the typical “pretend you’re scratching your face while subtly showing it” method, at which Sirius chuckled, amused.

Their little moment of peace was cut short by the already familiar clink of glass against silver, indicating that Horace Slughorn was going to start another one of his endless speeches. Marlene rolled her eyes, already tired of it before it even began.

“Now, students, I’m sure we can all agree that this was a memorable dinner, and we’re all having so much fun, aren’t we?” Slughorn said, and was met with deafening silence and a few unenthusiastic “yeah”s  scattered here and there. “But, we cannot end the party like this. The night is young, people, and we are, too!” He said.

“How’s he including himself and fifteen year-olds in the same group?” Dorcas whispered, and Marlene suppressed a chuckle. Honestly, this man’s lack of self-awareness was astonishing.

“I think we all know what this means.” He continued, unbothered. He imitated a drumroll, and Marlene snorted as quietly as she could. “It’s time to dance, baby!” He clapped, urging people to join him.

Marlene did, just for the sake of her grades.

“Now, I’m going to ask you all to form pairs.” People began talking, moving around and pointing at their friends in the distance to let them know their intentions. “Settle down, settle down.” Slughorn said. “I didn’t finish. The pairs have got to have a boy and a girl, just at the beginning.”

“Great.” Dorcas murmured, crossing their arms with a bored expression on her face. “At least I won’t have to participate in this fucking embarassment.” They said, though Marlene could tell that she was secretly hurt by this. They had never really liked Slughorn, to Marlene’s knowledge, but he was still head of their house, and her potions professor, and someone who just completely ignored their gender identity for the sake of an old-fashioned tradition.

Marlene wanted to say something, but what could she say to her sworn rival, who she’d barely even talked to if it wasn’t for the sake of their competition.

“Oi, McKinnon!” Sirius tried to get her attention. “May I have this dance?” He asked flourishly, with an over exaggerated bow.

“Sure.” Marlene said distractedly, still looking at Dorcas. She wasn’t the only one, she soon noticed, because Pandora and Regulus were also staring at them now, worry written on their faces.

“I, erm…” Marlene started. “I’m sorry.” Marlene muttered. She wasn’t quite sure what she was meant to say in this particular situation, but that was clearly not it, because Dorcas looked up at her with a deadly expression on her face, brows furrowed.

“I don’t need your fucking pity, McKinnon.” She spat, fire in their eyes.

Without another word, they got up, smoothing their suit mindlessly, and stalked out of the room.

Should Marlene go after her? It seemed like it was her fault and, even if she despised Dorcas, she knew how unfair it was to them, even if she couldn’t understand it entirely.

Dorcas probably wouldn’t want Marlene there, she thought. She turned to Pandora, who seemed the most approachable out of Dorcas’ friends now present.

“Should I… should I go after them?” She asked, unsure.

“No.” It was Regulus who answered severely. If looks could kill, Marlene would be dead ten times over.

“We’ve dealt with this before.” Pandora explained kindly. “They just need to be alone for a moment, then she’ll be just fine.”

“I’d say “just fine” is a bit of an overstatement, but yeah, that’s basically it. Not that they’d want your company, anyways.” Regulus said.

It was true, and Marlene’s friends would have probably said the same if the roles were reversed, but it made Marlene’s chest tighten up, for some reason.

“Right.” Marlene said, going to find Sirius before the first dance started.

She saw as Pandora conjured up a piece of paper and a quill, scribbling something before folding it into an aeroplane and making it go flying across the room.

“Alright, everyone!” Slughorn shouted, making everyone turn to look at him. “Grab your partner, put your arms around them… yes, don’t be shy, now. And let the dance begin!” Marlene almost puked. She was starting to question all the life decisions that brought her to that point.

She wrapped her arms around Sirius’ neck, trying not to laugh, and they swayed to the music, if only to stop Slughorn from coming over and taking matters into his own hands, as he was already doing with other couples.

“Do you think Dorcas is okay?” Marlene asked Sirius halfway through the dance.

He grinned. “You’re gonna make me agree with Mary if you continue like this, and you know how much I hate that.” He teased. “I reckon they’re going to be, just maybe not right now.” He said, shrugging.

“Okay.” Marlene nodded, trying to keep them out of her mind, but to no avail.

“Are you sure you hate her?” Sirius asked, though his face was mostly serious.

“Yes!” Marlene said, maybe a bit too quickly. “They’re absolutely despicable, but that doesn’t mean that she isn’t a human being with feelings, you know?”

“Of course.” Agreed Sirius. “Just like you’re a human being with feelings. And, more importantly, feeling for Dorcas.” He winked.

“Only if the feelings are disgust, anger, and-”

“Love?” Sirius finished, his smirk so prominent Marlene had to step on his foot just to make up for it.

“Are you sure you’re not just Mary with Polyjuice potion?” Marlene joked inquisitively.

“A lady never tells.” Sirius smiled, twirling her around.

“Now,” Slughorn said, holding his wand to his neck to amplify his voice, “everyone find another partner, whoever you want.” He prompted.

Sirius let Marlene twirl to her right until she found her next partner, while he went to the left. The music was much more lively.

As Marlene tried to steady herself after all those tours, a hand held her by the small of her back, leaning her down until the tips of her blond hair touched the floor. Marlene looked up, still feeling a bit dizzy, and found herself, once again, face to face with Dorcas, who was smiling mischievously down at her, their braids brushing across Marlene’s cheek.

“How much time did you spend looking for me just to have your grand entrance?” Marlene smirked, ignoring the heat that was rising to her face (it was just from twirling around so much anyways, nothing else). “Who’s helplessly in love with who now, huh?”

“Please,” Dorcas scoffed, “you practically collided with me. Be grateful I didn’t let you fall.”

“Afraid I’d ruin my pretty face?”

“Afraid you’d get more sympathy points.” They corrected her, keeping up with the choreography with enviable ease.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, Meadowes.” Marlene said, happy they were back to their normal bickering. She couldn’t believe she’d really felt bad for the person standing in front of her right now, who’d do anything to get on her nerves. Marlene was just too kind for her own good, she decided.

“Let’s switch again!” Slughorn urged them.

“Try not to be too disappointed.” Dorcas winked, twirling her around once more and disappearing amongst the dancers.

“As if.” Marlene muttered, mostly to herself, as another person came to move with her.

***

“Check.” Peter said, ordering his rook to threaten Mary’s king.

“Again?” Mary said incredulously, shaking her head.

She’d agreed to play a quick game of chess with Peter, who was known to excel at the game. Not many people wanted to play with him after their first colossal loss, so he was running out of opponents.

Mary was currently four games in, with her wounded pride and relentless competitiveness, and she was starting to understand why Peter had so much trouble finding someone to face.

Mary lay down on the carpeted floor of the common room, pretending to be deep in thought, though she was clearly just delaying the inevitable. She sighed.

She ordered her king to move one square to the right, just trying to last more than five minutes against Pettigrew, for once.

“What do you think they’re doing at the Slug Club right now?” James asked, sprawled out on the sofa next to them.

“Don’t know, don’t care.” Mary said, studying the board to see if there was something she could do to prevent her imminent defeat. There wasn’t.

“Sirius was pretty dressed up when he left.” James commented. “What do you think Regulus is wearing? ‘Cause-”

“James, why the fuck would you care what Regulus has on, mate?” Peter questioned, ripping his eyes off the board for the first time in a while. Would he notice if Mary moved a few pieces?

“No reason.” James quickly said, straightening up a bit. “I was just asking. Anyways, what do you reckon he’s- I mean they are doing right now? Maybe they’re dancing… Godric, I wish I could be there.” James daydreamed, his eyes on the ceiling.

Peter turned back to the game. “Mary, what the hell do you think you’re doing with that bishop?” He said, seeing Mary discreetly try to reincorporate one of her dead pieces back into action.

“Oh, I was just… observing the piece. It’s very, erm… detailed.” She tried to cover up her failed attempt, though she knew that Peter wouldn’t buy it for a second.

“Sure you were, Mary.” Peter shook his head, moving another piece. “Check. Again.”

Mary groaned.

“Do you think Regulus-” James started.

“James, I swear, if you don’t shut up about Regulus, I am going to find a way to shove all 32 of these pieces, plus the board up your fucking ass.” Mary exploded, tired of hearing about the boy. In her opinion, James should just make a fucking move or shut up about it, but he seemed to want to do neither of those things.

“Kinky.” James smiled, wiggling his eyebrows. Mary threw her shoe at him.

“Honestly, should’ve seen that one coming.” Peter said.

“That’s what she said.” Both Mary and James said, bursting into uncontrollable laughter upon seeing their synchronisation. 

This went on for a few minutes, with one of them gasping for air, making the other snort and begin all over again, until they finally managed to calm down a bit.

“Why do I hang out with you guys?” Peter wondered, though Mary had heard him chuckling a bit when he thought he wouldn’t be discovered.

“Shut up, Pete, you love us.” Mary grinned.

“Yeah, if you’d prefer to go hang out with Lily and Remus in the library then, by all means, do.” James said, pointing to the door.

“Ugh, as if.” Peter wrinkled his nose. “You wouldn’t find me dead in the library if it’s not exam season.”

“Amen.” Mary smiled. She absolutely adored Lily, but she couldn’t understand what was so great about hanging out with a lonely woman in a place where you couldn’t even talk or eat (two of Mary’s favourite activities, frankly).

“So, Potter, why is it you can’t keep talking about Sirius’ brother?” Peter asked, confused, apparently seeming to have finally caught on to James’ comments.

“Oh, he’s got a big, fat crush on little Reggie, for some reason.” Mary said.

“Shut up.” James groaned.

“Please, it was hardly a secret, with the way you look at him every time he walks by. You’re lucky Sirius is so oblivious to… everything, basically.” Mary shrugged.

“How did this even happen?” Peter questioned, still not getting it. Honestly, Mary couldn’t blame him. To her, it all came out of the blue, too.

“Listen, Pete,” James said seriously, sitting up to emphasise the importance of the situation, “you can’t tell Sirius, okay?” He almost pleaded.

“‘Course I won’t. I’m a fantastic secret keeper, Potter, you know that.” Peter smiled. Then he turned to Mary. “Are you ever going to give up, or do I have to kill all your pieces and corner your king for you to understand that you’ve already lost, MacDonald?”

“Mhm, let me think about it…” Mary said, putting a hand on her chin to pretend she was putting a lot of thought to it. “I think I’m gonna go for the second option.” She grinned, laughing at Peter’s sigh.

“Well, James, I’m waiting.” He said, looking at him as he killed off another one of Mary’s pawns.

“You guys wouldn’t get it.” James sighed, scrunching his nose to straighten his glasses.

“Seriously, Potter?” Mary complained. “Just because we aren’t all hopeless romantics like you doesn’t mean we lack basic comprehension skills, thank you very much. Just get on with it, would you?”

“Well, it’s not that simple!” James defended himself. “I can’t really explain it, y’know?”

“Do we look like we have any idea what you’re talking about?” Peter replied.

It was true, really. He and Mary were painfully single, and had never really had a meaningful relationship, so they were both a bit clueless when it came to love.

“Okay, so, it’s like this, yeah?” James started, gesturing with his hands as he went on. “Like, you’re aware that this one person exists, right?, and you’ve never really given it much thought before, ‘cause they’re always just… there, y’know, regardless of your relationship with them. Like, they could be a complete stranger, or a close friend, an enemy, whatever. But then, just, all of a sudden, you look at them like you would, and have, any other day, and it just hits you. It’s like this sudden wave of emotion that washes over you, and you know that something has changed, even if you can’t quite place exactly what it is. And, once you’re in that wave, you can either drown, or swim.” Here, he grinned. “As you probably know by now, I’m an excellent swimmer, so I just accepted it.” He finished.

“What, so you just woke up one day and thought “mhm, you know who’s kinda hot? My best friend’s brother, who he hasn’t talked to in months!”” Mary said sarcastically. 

She could partially understand what James was talking about, but it bummed her that she had never experienced anything like it before. She was standing with her feet planted in dry soil while everyone else surfed the waves in the distance. 

“It obviously wasn’t like that, Mary.” James crossed his arms, not so happy that Mary had ruined his poetic rant about crushes and love. “It happened, as you know, in the carriage. That’s where it started, and then I started noticing him more and more, watching from a distance, and it… evolved, from there.”

“Into a teeth-rotting obsession?” Peter smiled, but Mary could tell that he was also thinking about what James said, and how natural it felt to him.

“Shut up.” James ordered. “Now, I suppose it’s only fair, after I poured my heart out to you, you guys have to tell me who you fancy.” He proclaimed, smirking.

“No one really comes to mind.” Peter shrugged, making another offensive against Mary’s king.

“Same.” Mary agreed. “We can’t all be blessed with your rose-coloured glasses, and we have to resign ourselves to see the world as it is.”

“Oh, don’t even try to play the sympathy card right now, MacDonald.” James laughed. “Are you absolutely sure that there’s no one in your life like that? Even a little bit?” James questioned, not quite believing her.

“A hundred per cent.” Mary confirmed, rolling her eyes as she finally accepted her defeat and resigned, earning a whoop from Peter, who immediately started doing his signature celebratory dance.

At that moment, the portrait door swung open, and in came Lily and Remus, chattering casually. Mary’s face brightened up when she saw her friend.

“Lily!” She shouted, springing up from the floor to envelop her in a tight hug. “I can’t believe you left me all alone with these two losers.” She joked, fake-reprimanding her.

“Hey!” Both James and Peter said, glaring at Mary, who just laughed as she led Lily to the sofa, making James scoot so they could sit side by side.

“When do you reckon Marls and Sirius will be back?” Remus asked, settling down next to Peter.

“No idea,” Lily said, yawning, “but I’ll probably be asleep already.” She set her head on Mary’s shoulder, just resting there, and Mary’s breath hitched for a second.

She cleared her throat, ignoring the way Lily’s red hair tickled her arm, or how she could feel Lily’s exhales on her chest. 

“Oi, Remus,” Peter said, turning to said boy, “did you know about James’ crush?” He asked inquisitively. 

“Are you finally realising that he had a crush on Lily during first year, or are you talking about his most recent one?” Remus asked, slightly teasing.

“Let it be known that I found out about it in fourth year, okay? I’m not that dumb.” Peter retorted.

“That’s not quite the compelling argument you think it is, Pete.” Mary chuckled, running her fingers through Lily’s soft hair.

“Shut it, Mary.” He responded, showing her his middle finger. “Anyways, I obviously meant his new one. Did you know about it?” He asked again.

“‘Course I did, Wormy. I’m not nearly as clueless as you and Sirius.” Remus stated, arranging the chess pieces once again to go against Peter (Remus was the only one who stood a chance with him, but even he lost practically half the time).

“You know, Remus,” Lily said, and her proximity made Mary shiver, “it’s actually admirable, the way you manage to sneak Sirius in any and all conversations.” She smiled cheekily, but it was distorted a bit, given her position, with her cheek smudged against Mary.

“That’s not true.” Remus defended. “Plus, I merely brought him up because it was relevant to the subject.” He stated. “I mean, I’m pretty sure James has slipped up at least once about his little crush in front of him, and he’s still not getting it.”

“I’ll have you know, Lupin, I’ve been very careful not to mention him by name in his presence, actually.” James said, matter-of-factly.

“The fact that you don’t say his name doesn’t make it any less obvious.” Remus said.

“Well, it’s working, isn’t it?” James retorted, holding his hands up in a “what can you do?” manner.

Remus rolled his eyes, making the first move on the chess board.

***

The next few days were quite uneventful for Mary.

That was, of course, until Sirius came knocking insistently on her dorm door, shouting for her to come out.

Mary got up from her bed, cursing under her breath as she stopped the record player. Marlene was probably at quidditch practice, and Lily was surely in the library or the common room.

“What!?” She asked, irritated, as she opened the door. 

Sirius was standing in front of her, in his school uniform, his hair a bit messy, as if he’d been repeatedly running his fingers through it. He looked worried, so Mary let him in, making him sit on her bed.

“I’ve got a problem.” Sirius said simply, exhaling.

“And I suppose you’ve come here to talk to me about it?” Mary guessed, sitting by his side.

“Right on the money, MacDonald.” Sirius grinned, but Mary could tell he was still on edge.

“What’s this about, then?”

“Well, as I said, I’ve got a massive problem.” He reinstated. “Okay, full disclosure, I have known about it for a while, but I’ve mostly just been repressing it.”

“Understandable.” Mary nodded. “Continue.”

“But it’s starting to become unavoidable because…” Sirius faltered. “Because I actually wanna do something about it.” He said quickly, as if he couldn’t bear to let the words out of his mouth.

“Right. So…” Mary prompted, already invested.

“I, er… I think I have a crush on Remus.” He blurted out, hiding his face between his hands as his cheeks started getting pink.

“Oh. That’s what was worrying you?” She asked. She’d been expecting some real drama, but this could be easily resolved.

“Yeah?” He said, unsure. “Why do you say it like that?”

“Sirius, darling, has it occurred to you that you may not be the most subtle person when it comes to these things?”

“You mean… you knew already?” He asked, sounding betrayed, almost.

“Everyone knew, Black.” Mary rolled her eyes. Upon seeing Sirius’ reaction, she added: “Well, I mean, obviously not Remus, he’s just as bad as you when it actually involves him.” She smiled.

“Are you sure he doesn’t know?”

“As sure as I can be. Honestly.” 

“So… What should I do?” Sirius asked apprehensively, biting his nails.

“Do whatever you want, Sirius, just don’t worry about what his reaction will be, ‘cause it will be alright, I promise.” Mary said, giving him her word.

“But what if he doesn’t feel the same? I mean, he’ll say that it’s alright, and that nothing has to change, because he’s nice like that, but in his head, he’ll be thinking all sorts of mean things about me, and then it’ll be awkward, and-”

“Shut up for a second, Sirius.” Mary stopped him before he could continue his long rant. “First of all, you and Remus are friends, okay? Best friends, even, so don’t think for a second that he’d be stupid enough to let something like this get in the way of that.” Mary assured him. “And, secondly, I can guarantee that Remus likes you just as much as you like him.”

“What?” Sirius said, freezing. Honestly, it was kind of cute how clueless they both were, but Mary had had enough of pining from both sides, so she decided to do what she did best: meddle.

“What you heard. I mean, I don’t have first-hand confirmation from him the way I now have yours, but it’s quite obvious.”

“No, it’s not. I haven’t noticed it.” 

“As I said before, you’re so oblivious, you’d probably think he wants to be “just friends” even after he kissed you.” Mary shook her head.

“So, you think I should… confess my feelings for him?”

“I mean, don’t quote me on this, on the very off-chance that it goes wrong, but yes.” Mary said.

“I thought you said you were absolutely certain.” Sirius said, all his confidence out the window again.

“I am!” Mary affirmed. “I mean, I’m like… ninety nine per cent sure.”

“Mary…” Sirius warned.

“I just don’t want to be blamed if it turns out that I was wrong!” She explained herself.

Sirius groaned, laying down on the bed. “Why’s everything so bloody complicated?” He complained.

“Listen, Sirius, why don’t you just ask Lily?” Mary proposed. “I mean, if Remus has told anyone about it, it’s gotta be her, right?”

“Mary, you know damn well that Lily would go blabbering about it to Remus if I did. I can’t risk it.” Sirius said.

“Wouldn’t that just confirm the fact that Remus fancies you?” Mary asked. Sirius looked confused. “I mean, Lily may have a closer relationship with Remus, but she’s still your friend. I’m sure she would never do anything to hurt you, meaning that she’d only tell Remus if she knew he also liked you, to give him the push he needs to make the first move.” She explained.

“That’s quite optimistic, Mary. Didn’t know you had it in you.” Sirius smirked, and Mary shoved him lightly. “Still, I doubt it would work out that well. Why don’t you ask her, huh? You’re best friends, that’s gotta count for something, right?”

“Oh, yes, I only ever became friends with Lily because I knew this day would come, and our whole friendship is based on the need to get you two idiots together, and definitely not on any complex feelings on our part. I forgot, we’re just there to further your relationship with Remus. How silly of me.” Mary said sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

“I didn’t mean it like that, Mary.” Sirius excused himself. “I’m sorry. I just meant that maybe you could ask her.” He clarified.

“I can try, but I doubt she’d tell me anything that Remus told her in confidentiality. She’s very loyal, you know?” Mary argued.

“What about you, then? Would you ever tell her about my… situation, if she asked?” Sirius wondered.

“‘Course.” Mary smiled teasingly. “What? I’m sick and tired of seeing all the longing glances you two throw at each other when you think that the other one isn’t looking. I’d do anything to stop it.” She said light-heartedly.

“What makes you think we’d be better as a couple?” Sirius grinned. “If anything, I think we’d be at least ten times worse. Think about all the PDA…” Sirius said, his eyes glazing over as he imagined that future.

“Ugh.” Mary groaned. “I hadn’t thought about it. In that case, Remus absolutely despises you and I think you should just hide this little crush until it passes.” She joked, and Sirius laughed.

“Shut up, MacDonald. Don’t you have a special someone to pine over?”

“Not at the moment.” Mary shrugged. What did everyone know that she didn’t? Maybe she shouldn’t complain so much about Sirius, because it was starting to look like she was just as oblivious as him.

“Really?”

“Yes, now leave me alone, Black, or I’ll tell Remus that you like him.” Mary threatened jokingly.

“Is this how it’s gonna be from now on, then?” Sirius asked. “I pour my heart out to you, I become vulnerable, and you use it to blackmail me?” He feigned offence.

“Yes? I thought you were aware of this already.” Mary smiled.

“I hate you.” Sirius declared, sticking his tongue out at her.

“Right back at you.” Mary replied, turning the music on once again as they both lay on her bed in silence.