Roomates
Remus used to think having friends was overrated, not needed, a burden to stop him from continuing with life the way he wants to. Remus used to tell himself he didn't need friends, that he could do it by himself just like he always did, alone.
So when James, Sirius and Peter tried to talk to him all the time he was surprised and a little bit clueless. Remus didn't think he was doing anything wrong by just being quiet all the time but then he realised the boys were talking to him less and less, not inviting him to go on walks or join in pranking.
The mousey haired boy didn't know what he was doing wrong or how to fix it so he kept his distance from all except one.
~~~
Standing outside transfiguration class, all three of his dorm mates were waiting,
"I'm gonna go in I don't think he's showing up any time soon" peter picked up his back pack from the floor and went inside followed by James who gave Sirius a sympathetic look and a,
"See you in there mate" before retreating into the classroom, Sirius didn't go in he gladly stood outside for 5 minutes waiting for Remus to show up and when he finally did Sirius gave a toothy grin returned with a side smile from the smaller boy,
"You waited?"
The black boy shrugged kicking a piece of dirt across the floor,
"It's nothing, didn't want you to be alone"
Remus went to reply when they got interrupted by the door opening and a slightly tall woman with a stern face looking down at them through her glasses,
"Ah there you boys are!"
"Come on in then don't dawdle"
Both boys stepped into the classroom taking a seat together which ended in james tapping Sirius on the back to see why he didn't sit with him instead to which the black boy just smiled and turned around.
By the end of the lesson Peter managed to blow up a cup, Sirius' cup levitated out the window, Remus' smashed and James did it perfectly along side lily evans whom smirked as the taller messy haired boy stared his mouth gaped open in awe.
Remus was making his way out when McGonagall stopped him at the door,
"Mr. Lupin please stay behind a minute"
Remus stepped away from the door letting the others through before closing it, Mcgonagall's usually stern face softened.
"As you know tonight is the first full moon of the year"
Remus put his head down ashamed of being different,
"Tonight at 7pm after dinner I would like you to meet me at my office so I can make sure you get to the shack safely"
Remus looked up at his professor for a moment checking to see if this was all some kind of joke, a prank on him but her eyes were genuine and soft.
This didn't last long before they became stern again,
"Right. That will be all thank you Mr. Lupin you may leave"
the small boy left the classroom finding the three boys leaned up against the wall, Peter eating, James throwing a ball in the air and Sirius biting his nails anxiously.
He stared at them waiting for them to realise he was there, Sirius was the first to notice as he stopped chewing on his finger tips gaining a massive grin, James being the second after getting hit in the stomach by Sirius' hand and Peter being the last when he ran out of mini chocolate balls,
"Remus?! You're out" peter almost screamed
"Did you get into trouble?" James said right after, but Sirius didn't say anything he just slapped his arm round the smaller boy and grinned,
"Why did you wait?"
Remus genuinely couldn't understand why anyone wanted to be around him as much as these guys do,
"We're your friends-"
"You're not my friends! I don't need friends you're all a bunch of poofs! I'm fine being alone"
Remus walked away leaving the three boys baffled, Sirius and James a little hurt not understanding what they did so wrong.
~~~
Remus avoided classes in the library all day that day before he decided to go back to the dorm room, he knows he'll have to face the boys but it's not something he could avoid forever unfortunately for him.
As Remus entered the dorm room all three boys fell unusually quiet staring at him,
"Stop staring"
Peter shook his head in defeat, James looking sympathetic at Sirius, Sirius turned away from James and stood up,
"Did we do something wrong?"
Remus ignored him,
"We want to make you feel comfortable,
We want to be with you like-"
Remus shot his head around in anger he had had enough for one day,
"I DONT NEED FRIENDS IVE GONE MY WHOLE LIFE WITHOUT EM NOW PISS OFF"
the sudden yelling made Peter sink under his bedsheets,
Sirius wasn't giving up though, he gave a stern non blinking look right into Remus' eyes something he learned from his mother.
"We have tried.. VERY hard to be your friends..."
Remus' face turned solid not breaking eye contact,
"I don't want it."
Sirius was getting riled up and was very frustrated,
"When people say nasty things about you, I tell them 'he might look like trouble but he's really just shy'..."
"I didn't ask you to do that."
Sirius' frustration turned into anger finally lashing out at the shorter boy,
"YOU SHOULDN'T HAVE TO BECAUSE THATS WHAT FRIENDS DO!"
Sirius blinked regretting shouting at him, he gathered his jacket and a book,
"and the fact that you don't know that says everything!"
Sirius considered stopping there but he didn't,
"You wanna be alone remus! BE ALONE"
He left the room slamming the door behind him,
Remus' face softened looking at James who smiled sympathetically again then going after Sirius, Remus' had hoped Peter would stay in the room but he left right behind James.
Now remus was all alone just like Sirius had said he wanted but it wasn't at all like he imagined it to be, he should be happy that they finally left him alone but all he felt was upset,
Remus backed himself against the wall sliding down until he's sitting on the floor with his legs tucked in hugging them into his chest,
Suddenly he started to cry he didn't know why but he did and he let himself, feeling as if he did something very wrong.
He did, and he knows that now. He took it too far and now there was nothing he could do about it.