Chapter 1
The longing to know. This is what has always been the main fuel of Regulus Black. The beauty of knowledge and understanding, the complexity of the world and its inner workings was something he always could and would appreciate. The depth and reason of everything. Well, everything except himself. Never himself.
So when he found himself holding that book again it was purely the result of his curiosity…and maybe faith or whatever that is.
Regulus was skimming through the books on the shelf, reordering the misplaced ones, when he saw a thin yellow book at the very end of the store. It wasn’t the first time it had caught his eye, however it was going to be the last time he laid his eyes on it.
“The Sun” by James Potter.
He rolled his eyes and took the book from the shelf.
“What do you think about it?”
The question caught him off guard and, if he was honest, so did the guy who asked it. When Regulus looked up he was greeted by a confident smile. The guy who wore it definitely did not look like someone who would go to bookshops…or someone who has opened a book before, for that matter. Regulus lazily raised his eyebrows.
“Excuse me?”
“What do you think about this book? Have you read it before?” the guy asked once more, nodding towards the book in Regulus’ hands. He looked genuinely…curious?
“Yes, I have,” answered Regulus while trying to avoid eye contact in hopes of quickly ending the conversation. If they were thinking that Regulus will just go around giving Ted Talks about every book in the shop, they will just have to pay him more. Because that wasn’t in the job application or in the plans of his day, really.
Then he decided to properly look at the person who just ruined his day of minimum talking. The guy had crazy hair. It was like all over the place. It made him look even taller than he already was. He was wearing round glasses that were a little tilted to the side. Regulus immediately had the urge to straighten them up for him. He quickly managed to pull himself together and not do that.
His eyes were…brown. However that is way too little words to describe how they made Regulus feel. They were warm and comforting. At the moment it felt like if Regulus looked at them long enough – the cold would never bother him again. They were so big and bright that it made Regulus pause.
“and to be honest it was a total waste of time,” continued Regulus, managing to keep his expression nonchalant.
“You don’t say,” replied the guy raising his eyebrows. There was a playful glinter of curiosity and challenge in his eyes. Great, thought Regulus, another hopeless romantic.
“It was a total cliché. Extremely predictable and yet absolutely unrealistic. Long story short - it’s just pretty shit,” stated Regulus. “I mean, the writing isn’t entirely terrible, in some places it’s not even that bad, but it’s just that it’s so banal that it…it feels like you’re reading a script of a soap opera.”
He made himself stop talking at that point. He didn't think his boss would be very thrilled knowing that their employees are walking around destroying the flush of the bookshop’s income. Way to go, Regulus, he thought to himself You’re getting way too comfortable here.
“Well” stuttered the guy. He was now standing on his both feet instead of leaning on the bookshelf like before, “maybe some people just like love?” He widened his eyes in question, but the curious glinter was still there. Regulus didn’t think his eyes could get any bigger, and yet – there they were. Regulus rolled his eyes.
“Well, if this is their perception of love, I think they should just go back to watching soap operas.”
The guy broke into a soft laugh and at that moment Regulus desperately wanted to think of something else to say just to hear it once more. He also managed to internally roll his eyes at his own stupid thought, if that’s even possible.
“What’s your name?” asked the guy looking straight into Regulus’ eyes. His look was so forward and confident like all he ever wanted to do was to look Regulus right in the eye. That made Regulus pause for a second.
The reason for his thirst for knowledge was the simple truth that knowledge is power.
Many years ago he promised himself to never be weak again. He vowed to run his mind and soul on knowing and understanding, just so he could fill the abyss of chaos and darkness in the middle of his chest. Regulus made himself unbreakable by swallowing the void inside him, because you cannot drown in the sea, if you have drowned the sea in yourself first.
And yet he found himself in the presence of a boy, simply asking his name, and got scared. Regulus got scared because his warm eyes looked like they were longing to know way more than his name. They wanted to know Regulus. They wanted to know him.
And at that moment, just this once, Regulus decided to let himself become known, because whatever was behind those eyes – he wanted to see it too. To hell with the longing to know.
“Regulus,” he replied.
The guy just gave him the disarming smile again, while not breaking eye contact.
“Well, Regulus,” the name rolled beautifully on his tongue, “your insights are extremely fascinating.”
It took Regulus a second to come back to reality and realize what insights he’s talking about. The eye-catching yellow book in his hands did the job, though.
By the time he caught up the guy next to him had already looked away and now he was simply observing another book on the shelf. However the corners of his mouth were still upturned.
“And you?” Regulus asked quickly. He could really just hit himself in the head right now. “And you?” Really? You can’t even form normal sentences anymore, can you? Regulus just hoped he did not sound too desperate.
“I mean your name. What’s your name?” he said.
The guy slowly broke into a grin once again. He smiled a lot, Regulus couldn’t help but notice. Then the guy looked Regulus right in the eye and…
“James. James Potter,” he replied, the grin not fading from his face.
Regulus could just feel the air get stuck in his throat. Shit.