Sirius could feel the pricks building in his throat. The soft petals rubbing against the healing cuts, soaking the puffy orange marigolds with blood and saliva. He knew what they meant. Every night he coughed them up, and every night he stared at them through tear covered eyes.
The flowers reminded him of a happier time. Before he knew what the butterflies meant. Before he realized what he was and what he could never have. Before he realized that the smile had made his heart flutter and the laugh made his stomach jump.
Before one of his best friends became his downfall.
He knew the moment he coughed up a small orange petal that he was doomed.
Once he realized his feelings, the disease started to progress worse. For the first few months, he was able to more or less hide it from his friends. He played off the coughing as allergies, and blamed his tiredness on tests coming up.
No one believed him, and he knew they didn't, but he was thankful his friends didn't pressure him.
James was the first to find out.
Sirius was on the bathroom floor, shaking and coughing. James ran over, trying to comfort the other and make sure he's still breathing.
He was, but he was coughing.
After what felt like hours, Sirius coughed up a fully formed orange marigold.
They had a long talk after that.
James was worried. Sirius wasn't.
The Black heir knew he was going to die, he just didn't know when. He knew the disease would never leave, because Remus would never love him the same. And he was fine with that.
He realized he was happy just knowing Remus was in his life.
He was perfectly fine.
He was.
When Remus announced he had gotten a girlfriend, Sirius almost choked on the flowers blooming in his throat. The petals cutting like daggers into his muscles, making it so he couldn't speak without blood falling from his mouth. James looked at him with thinly veiled worry. They both knew the course this disease would take, and this news would only speed things up.
He only had so much time as it was.
Lucy was a lovely girl, Sirius could admit that. Remus seemed happy with her, and she got along well with the other guys.
But Sirius couldn't bear the pain of looking at them happy together.
He spent more time in the library than usual, occasionally studying with Lily or reading up on spells.
When Remus was in the library, Sirius went to the dorm room. He went to an empty classroom to practice ballet. He went to talk to Regulus.
He went anywhere Remus wasn't, because seeing him happy with anyone else hurt too much to mention.
Remus found out when Sirius choked on the flowers in the night. The 3 sleeping marauders awoke to the sound of Sirius gasping for breath, coughing his lungs out.
The Black heir stopped breathing for a few minutes, causing Remus to spin into near panic while James fished out the flowers clogging his throat.
Sirius didn't start breathing again.
Peter ran to get help.
McGonagall called it Hanahaki's Disease. A magical disease that caused flowers to grow in someone's lungs and throat, eventually causing them to suffocate.
The cause? Unrequited love.
The flowers would represent the one that the victim loved.
Remus died a little inside when he watched James fish out the orange marigolds. The same ones the young werewolf would grow in the garden with his mother.
He wanted to cuss and scream, direct his anger anywhere but at himself. How could he have not noticed? Why did no one tell him?
He could've saved him.
He loved Sirius after all.
But none of that mattered as Remus laid a bouquet of orange marigolds on the cold corpse of Sirius Black.
"I love you."
A quiet whisper, meant only for the deaf ears of someone he could've saved, but never had the chance to.
Remus looked up from his desk, stretching his back and hearing the satisfying pop of his bones as the tension released. He looked around, a small smile toying at his lips. Strange to be back in Hogwarts as a teacher.
He would give his students everything they needed to be successful. Everything they needed to survive. Nothing would happen to them.
Nothing would happen like what happened to Sirius.
Something was off, but this didn't bother him. The energy was different, but felt safe. Familiar.
Remus Lupin had seen a lot, but the orange marigold appearing on his desk almost broke him inside.
"Moony!"
The shimmering ghost of his friend appeared before him, not looking a day older than he'd been when he died.
The professor held back tears.
"Padfoot."
"I heard you."
Remus held his breath.
"Heard me?"
"I love you too, Moony."
"You are an idiot Sirius."
Remus passed with a smile on his face. He joined James first, Lily welcoming him in right after.
They flew down the halls, and eventually found the one they were looking for.
Sirius sat at the top of the Gryffindor tower, arms open and waiting.
Remus ran to him and finally, finally they were together.
"I hate marigolds." Sirius whispered, the other giggled.
"I hear they're to die for."
Their laughter was swept away by the wind.