Chapter 2
CHAPTER TWO
Regulus pulls a book of the shelf in the library, hurrying to the table, hidden by shelves and shelves of books. He sits down and flips through it, murmuring beneath his breath. Spells and enchantments he knows and remembers, things he’d have to use in the future.
He turns to the page he’d been looking for, skimming the blocked letters with his eyes. He purses his lips, breathing out harshly when he slams the book shut. Frustration builds in the pit of his stomach.
There’s nothing in the book about time travel. The only thing ever recorded was the use of time when an Unspeakable did his job, but other than referring to it, they did not go into detail. Regulus seemed to be on his own when it came to the reason he was back at Hogwarts, reliving his school days over again.
“Fuck.” Regulus breathes, putting his head in his hands, scratching angrily at his scalp. He needed to find out why he was there—why he went back in time to here of all places? What was so important about this particular time?
Regulus tugs out a piece of parchment from his bag, ripping it into a smaller piece. He grabs his inkwell and his quill, hurriedly dipping it in the ink and starting a list.
Things that happened in fifth year:
Sirius left
Father fell fatally ill
Mother met up with the Dark Lord
Bellatrix joined the Dark Lord’s ranks
Narcissa and Lucius got engaged
Severus almost dies from Lupin on the fall moon because of Sirius
Potter saves Severus causing a life debt
Severus fell out with Evans
Severus was recruited
I was recruited
Regulus sits back, exhaling heavily, feeling like boulders were perching themselves atop this lungs. He was recruited at the end of the year, in the summer when he turned sixteen, which means he had a year to save his father from his mother’s poison. A year to save everyone he cared about. A year to distance himself from Walburga Black for good.
Regulus buries his head in his hands, raking his hands down his scalp, feeling the sting, the burn. Salazar, he wishes Sirius was with him now, to soothe his fears and reassure him that he could do it, that he could change things.
But Sirius couldn’t. Because he didn’t know.
Besides, Sirius was probably up in the Gryffindor dorms with his best friends, happy and swell now that his brother wasn’t in his life, that the evil Death Eater was ridded from his existence.
Regulus grumbles to himself as he packs his stuff away, slamming the books in a pile. He shoves the books back in place and slings his bag over his shoulder, fleeing the library.
He turns the corner. Arms grab him and he yells out in surprise, veering to the side. The arms stay true, tightening like vices around his biceps, so he struggles harder.
“Quit it, will you?” Lupin hisses as he tugs Regulus into an alcove. Potter’s suddenly there, appearing from the shadows. Regulus clenches his jaw, gaze flickering to the gap between them.
“Don’t even think about it, Black.” Potter warns. Regulus gulps, turning to face the duo. It had been two days since the incident with Sirius and he’d been avoiding Sirius ever since; the first day he hadn’t even gotten out of bed, just laid there, skipping lessons and asking for Barty to say he was sick to the Professors.
Regulus crosses his arms. “What do you want?”
“We want you to help Siri.” Regulus’ fingers tense. “He hasn’t eaten. He barely drinks anything. He’s barely sleeping. He’s like a husk of what he was before you two fought. We’ve tried everything. And it’s not fucking working.” Lupin snarls, sounding frustrated for the first time. Regulus feels his teeth gnash.
“I’m afraid I can’t—”
“Do you want to see your brother die?” Potter’s fist is closing against his throat, so furious and angry that he’s taken a step forward. Regulus back hits the wall, and he inhales sharply, sucking in gales of air. Potter had just put his hand there, loose and not at all tight, just resting there, a vague threat but all Regulus can see is hands; slimy, dry, cracking hands—
—Regulus screams, begging and screaming for water. Kreacher’s kneeling beside him, wiping at the drool and potion staining his chin and the corners of his mouth.
“Disappointing.” A voice whispers in his ears. Regulus whips around, mouth opening and closing. Kreacher asks what’s wrong in the background, but it’s like white noise, all fuzzy and blended in with the roaring in Regulus’ ears.
“Over there, in the lake. Water.” Regulus looks and it’s there. He’s never seen water look so inviting before. He wants to reach forward, to caress the top layer. He doesn’t see the stillness of it, doesn’t care if it doesn’t ripple on the surface like normal. He doesn’t see the heads, legs and skinny knees buried beneath the top; he just sees water.
He reaches for it, Kreacher croaking out a warning. Regulus buries his hand in and brings it to his mouth, gulping it back greedily. Just when he’s finished, feeling it settle in his stomach, a hand snaps out, chattering filling his ears. He chokes, fingers like claws dragging down his throat. A tight sensation, strangling him.
He can’t breathe, he can’t breathe, he can’t breathe.
He’s going to die—
Regulus is trembling like a leaf in the wind. “Can’t breathe, can’t breathe, can’t fucking breathe—”
“James!” Lupin snaps, watching Regulus with worried eyes. Potter snaps his hand away as though burned and Regulus wastes no time, scratching at his tie, ripping it off. He undoes the top buttons, pulling the fabric away from his neck, so it had room to breathe.
He knows that they see the red, inflamed scars on his throat for their eyes widen, lips shaping into garbled words.
“Merlin.” Potter gulps. Regulus laughs croakily, dryly.
“Like them, Potter? I’m afraid I’m not going to tell you where I got them done.” Regulus’ lips quirk with dry, dark humour. Potter and Lupin just stare at him, horrified. “You look like a unicorn’s been slayed in front of you. Don’t fret, dear old mother didn’t do this.” Regulus shoves his tie into his outer robe pocket, straightening up from where he’d collapsed against the wall. His pulse is still rabbiting beneath his skin, but his face gives away no hint that it is.
“I’m not sure that makes me feel any better.” Lupin says hesitantly. Regulus quirks an eyebrow, putting his pureblood mask back onto his face.
“Right, well, lead the way to my brother. I’ve always wanted to see the inside of the Gryffindork’s dorms.”
“Gryffindor.” Potter corrects, looking affronted.
“That’s what I said.”
Potter sends him an annoyed look, but Regulus can see that Lupin’s mouth is ticking up in the corner with silent amusement. Regulus hums beneath his breath as they make their way to the Gryffindor common room, silent except for the slapping of their footsteps.
When they finally come to a stop in front of the Fat Lady’s portrait, she takes one look at Regulus and sneers. “No Slytherin is allowed in my dorm.” Regulus arches his eyebrows in silent amusement and intrigue. The Fat Lady’s mouth creases when Potter explains why they’re there and to expect Regulus there a lot in the future.
Regulus opens his mouth to retort when the portrait flies open, out stepping two twins, Gideon and Fabian Prewett. He falls silent, his gaze meeting Gideon’s, who’s mouth ticks into a small smile. “Hey, James, Remus, Regulus.” His voice drops considerably, and Regulus feels his cheeks heat up. He’d forgotten the romance that had happened one night between Gideon and him, in Regulus’ dorm room he’d snuck Gideon into, after a party celebrating the end of exams.
A passionate night passed and a kiss goodbye and then they’d never spoken again after.
Regulus blinks himself back to the present. “Hey, Gideon. It’s, um, nice to see you.”
“You too.” Gideon beams widely and Fabian elbowed him in the side, greeting the Gryffindor’s and completely ignoring Regulus as he dragged Gideon away. As they turn the corner, Regulus hears Fabian’s incredulous hiss.
“You slept with Sirius Black’s baby brother?”
“It was amazing, Fabi.” Gideon sighs with happiness as if thinking back and remembering the night. Regulus blushes as their voices fade into the distance, looking up and into Potter and Lupin’s eyes. They’re staring at him, eyes like saucers.
“You slept with Gideon fucking Prewett?” Potter whisper-shouts. Regulus feels his lips stretch into a smile.
“Gideon was right, it was amazing.”
“But—but—but—GideonPrewett?”
“Gideon’s a good guy.” Regulus defends the red-haired male as they step into the common room, the portrait slamming shut behind them. Potter blushes.
“I know that, but how do you know that?”
“We did more than just have sex, Potter. It wasn’t a split second decision, heat of the moment thing. Gideon’s sweet and thoughtful, he treated me like a human being instead of a slimy snake. It was refreshing. He was … it was one of the best nights of my life.” Regulus smiles, cheeks warming when he thinks of the way Gideon’s knuckles had brushed his cheekbones, remembers leaning into the touch, butterflies fluttering like a soft lull in his stomach—
—“You’re so beautiful, Regulus.”—
Lupin lead them up and into the sixth year male dorms, shoving open the door. Whatever Potter had been about to say dies on his tongue when he looks into the room. Regulus turns to look, feeling his heart plummet as he takes in the paleness of Sirius’ face, the sunken cheeks and gaunt looking eyes. Pettigrew is by his side, trying to get Sirius to eat, but Sirius isn’t listening, staring at the opposite wall, just pass Pettigrew’s head.
“This is the worst I’ve ever seen him.” Pettigrew speaks up when he hears them, turning to face them. Sirius shows no signs that he hears them speaking about him. He just clutches the blanket tighter around himself.
“Do you know what’s going on?” Regulus nodded. “Do you know how to fix it?”
“Of all the times I’ve seen this happen, it’s happened to me.” Regulus says, voice low as he speaks. “Sirius is usually the one trying to pull me to the surface. I’m not really—responsive when it happens, you could say.” Regulus murmurs. Lupin’s face tightens and he reaches forward, clutching at Regulus’ hand.
“Help him. I don’t care how you do it, just try.” Lupin pleads. Regulus doesn’t remove his eyes from Sirius, nodding. Lupin lets go of his hand and Regulus glides forward, not even noticing Pettigrew get up, doesn’t notice them go to huddle on Potter’s bed, watching him as he sits down in Pettigrew’s old space.
It’s slightly warm from Pettigrew’s body heat, which means Pettigrew had been sitting there a long time, trying to coax food and drink into Sirius’ system. Regulus closes his eyes, pressing back the tears and when he finally opens them, he reaches forward, helping Sirius into a sitting position.
“Accio hair supplies.” Regulus whispers. Sirius’ pride and joy is his hair and seeing it now, basically matted and dry, is slightly sickening. To see the luscious locks so flat makes nausea, threaten to overwhelm Regulus’ stomach.
Sirius shifts when he feels Regulus’s fingers in his hair. Regulus works slowly and steadily, parting individual locks, brushing it back to smoothness, sealing product into the roots and ends. He begins humming as he works, voice lilting to a smooth melody, a gentle lullaby Sirius sung to him.
“Give me a kiss and I’ll savour this night,
Just as the wind breathes its breath to my life
You have awakened a part of my soul
A pleasantry
Here in my dreams
And so, I am lost in the shadows on the wall
And this Latin Lullaby is all I have to remind me
Oh, so many stars
But no, not half as bright as you.”—
—Sirius stopped the brushing of his hair and looked to the side, seeing Regulus watching longingly.
“Come here.” Sirius beckoned his brother forward. Regulus did as ordered, plopping down in front of Sirius, waiting. When he felt Sirius’s fingers run through his hair, brushing a comb through his and up into the typical do that Sirius normally had, he grinned brightly, most of his teeth still coming through.
“Thank oo’, Riri!” Regulus had a slight lisp as he talked but Sirius paid no mind because he had one too, though he was starting to loose it since he had most of his adult teeth grown in already. After a moment of soothing silence, Regulus opened his mouth. “Sing for me?”
And so, Sirius sung the song that would become theirs; Regulus and Sirius’ for years to come—
Sirius’ head lilted to the side, blinking dull, lifeless eyes at him. Regulus could see awareness slowly coming back, so he snapped his fingers, Kreacher appearing with a crack.
“Get Sirius’ favourite meal immediately.” Regulus ordered, Kreacher sneering at Sirius.
“Kreacher does not know nasty masters’ favourite meal—”
“Kreacher, you will cease to call Sirius that at once.” Regulus barks like a rabid dog, glaring at Kreacher for the first time. Kreacher freezes, lowering his head, sniffling lowly.
“Kreacher is sorry, master Regulus. Kreacher knows how much other master means to you. Kreacher did mean no offense.” Kreacher’s lips twitch unhappily. “But Kreacher does not know other masters favourite—”
“Fish and chips, Kreacher, muggle style.” Regulus says, turning back to face Sirius.
“Of course, master Regulus, Kreacher will get it as fast as Kreacher can.” With a short bow, Kreacher snaps away. Regulus smooths his hand through Sirius’ hair, watching as Sirius blinks at him once more, recognition making it’s way into his gaze.
“Reggie?”
“Welcome back.” Regulus whispers, kissing Sirius’ forehead. Sirius inhales sharply.
“Is this real? I’m not dreaming, am I?”
“No,” Regulus says sadly, watching Sirius’ grey eyes, swimming with tears, focus on him once more, “this is real. I’m here, I promise.” Regulus swipes his thumb across Sirius’ face, catching the stray tears and soothing Sirius’ sudden emotional wave after locking it away for two days straight.
Kreacher cracks back into the room, handing Regulus a tray. Regulus thanks him and watches him disappear back to Grimmauld, murmuring to keep it between them and not tell their mother, Kreacher nodding. Regulus feeds Sirius bites slowly, until, piece by piece, the plates gone and the drink of coca cola that Kreacher had added is also down Sirius throat, settling in his stomach.
“Reggie?” Regulus hums to show he’s listening, moving the tray to the floor. He’d pulled back the covers, climbing into bed with Sirius. Sirius had welcomed him enthusiastically, cuddling him closer, laying his head on Regulus’ chest. “I’m tired.”
“Then sleep, chiot, sleep.”
Sirius’s eyes droop close of their own accord. “Reggie?”
“Yeah, Sirius?”
“I love you.” Regulus’ lips quiver as Sirius fades of into sleep, tears tumbling down his cheeks. Sirius grumbles contentedly beneath him, sniffing into his chest. Regulus presses his lips to Sirius’s temple, breathing in shakily.
“I love you too, chiot.”