Caritas omnia potest

-Severus View-

Sue had sent me home early, she must have noticed that my mind was not on my work. Even though I always wanted to know what had happened in my past, this encounter had left me a little confused. I had been trying to remember for a year. Again and again I looked at the boxes that were safely stowed away in the cellar, but I couldn't place any of them. Maybe the unknown person could help me. All the doctors I had seen assumed that I had amnesia and didn't hold out much hope that I would ever be able to remember again. Lost in thought, I walked along the street, past the blocks of flats. At first I had only lived in one of these flats myself, but when you had a fascination for books, at some point the space was no longer enough. Coincidentally, one of the terraced houses next door became empty shortly afterwards. An opportunity I immediately seized. Frowning, I watched a father with his child. He made a rather desperate impression on me.

"Looks like we've made this journey for nothing, Senara." Suddenly, lightning flashed through my head, scenes that I couldn't place appeared in my mind's eye.

"I think Senara would fit in perfectly. Every family needs a little heroine, don't they?" The image instantly blurred again. It took me a while to regain my composure as I looked directly into two storm grey eyes staring at me in disbelief. Only now did I notice that the man I didn't know was supporting me.

"Senara?" I whispered softly and looked at the little girl on his arm, who squealed happily and leaned in my direction.

"Not princess," came the panicked blond-haired man.

"That's all right. I know you have better things to do, but would it be possible to accompany me home?", I asked sheepishly. The situation was more than uncomfortable for me, especially because this had never happened to me in public before: my legs suddenly gave way and images appeared before my inner eyes that I couldn't place. Nevertheless, there was something familiar, similar to this afternoon when Andromeda had hugged me.

"We have nothing better to do. Actually, we were looking for you, the address was just a bit illegible, unfortunately. Where do we have to go?"

"To the end of the street and then left, that's where I live," I mumbled absently. This was all getting to be too much. First Andromeda and now these two, they knew who I was, only I had no idea who they were.

"It would be better if you put an arm around my shoulders. Senara can't walk such long distances yet," he said, slightly exasperated. I nodded imperceptibly and tried to stand up to follow his instructions.

"She didn't tell me your name," I said between clenched teeth.

"Lucius, I'll answer all your other questions once we get to you," he replied, smiling slightly. I could live with that, apart from the fact that I had to concentrate on the way so that all three of us wouldn't end up on our noses.

"The first house," I said quietly.

"Looks nice."

"Did you expect anything else?"

"Sev don't blame me, but I only knew your house in Spinners End and it was anything but handsome. I was rather surprised that you hadn't sold it earlier." Lucius replied grudgingly and looked at me challengingly. He was more than right about the house in Spinners End. Not only did I not feel comfortable there, no, at night I was haunted by nightmares. The ones I couldn't really place. With Lucius' support, I finally managed to unlock the front door.

"Sev what are you actually doing now?" asked Lucius, breaking the awkward silence that had broken out between us.

"I work two streets away in a library. The work is doable since the doctors aren't sure what's wrong with me," I answered his question and led them both into the kitchen. Lucius set the little girl down and got some building blocks out of his backpack for her to play with.

"Hmmh, does she like honeydew melons? I don't have anything for babies here and Sue's children are already eleven and fifteen."

"Haven't tried it yet, but she'll gobble up pretty much any fruit you put under her nose. Who is Sue?" he asked curiously, looking at me with a smile.

"My supervisor. It wasn't easy to find a job with this huge memory gap," I mumbled absently.

-Lucius View-

I watched Severus' actions carefully, even if he couldn't remember, his body could. The way he prepared the melon for Serena was one and the same as the way he prepared his ingredients for all the potions. I had watched him for hours before, there was something soothing about the way he made potions.

"Tea?"

"Erm yes please," I replied slightly confused, I had been too caught up in my thoughts about the past.

"Wait, I'll do it, you can eat the honeydew melon with Senara," I added, pushing the plate with the melon pieces into his hand and taking the kettle from Severus. Severus looked appraisingly at my daughter, who was playing peacefully with her building blocks in the corner, and finally sat down next to her and watched her try to stack the blocks on top of each other without them falling over again the next moment.

"Just hold a piece out to her, if she doesn't like it she usually spits it out," I explained to him, watching them both in the corner of my eye. Senara examined the piece of melon in Severus' hand critically before hesitantly opening her mouth. She finally squealed with delight and crawled onto Severus' lap, where she ate on her own and occasionally held a piece in front of Severus' nose.

"She's cute," Severus smirked, stroking her head gently.

"Yes she is," I confirmed with a forced smile, handed Severus the teacup and sat down opposite the two of them. Senara immediately came crawling to me and snuggled against my chest.

"Where's your wife?"

"Dead.", I replied coolly. Even though I had not thought of Narcissa as my wife since I had entered into a relationship with Saorise, according to the paper she had been.

"I'm sorry to hear that," came the apologetic reply from Severus.

"Don't be, because I'm not sorry either. I'm not going to tell you everything that happened in the past, at least not today. I have two children, by two women. One of them I loved and the other I married because my status demanded it," I replied and grimaced. Talking about Narcissa was no problem, even if it was pure hatred that crossed my lips. The only positive thing that had come out of this marriage was Draco. I avoided talking about Saorise as much as possible.

"I'm listening, even though I can see it's probably not easy for you." I nodded barely noticeably, trying to suppress my inner hatred of Narcissa. Gently, I stroked my daughter's hair, who had decided to take a little nap.

"Narcissa went to class with me, relatively quickly it was clear to our parents that we would get married one day, which we did in the end. It wasn't until seven years later that Draco was born. No matter how hard I tried to have a sensible marriage with her, it just didn't work. Narcissa was impossible to please, no matter how much I invested in this marriage and in Narcissa, she always found fault with it. Ten years ago I needed a break from it all, from my commitments, especially from my wife. You told me that you sometimes go on a summer holiday to a fishing village in Ireland to get some peace and quiet. I didn't think it was a bad idea and came with you. Saorise was a good friend of yours, when we were at school I didn't really notice her, but this summer I noticed her even more. I tried desperately to stay away from her, after all I am the devil and she is an angel. But all my efforts failed, mainly because you thought we were cute together and had your fingers in the pie. At first I had a guilty conscience towards Narcissa, which you talked me out of within a month. Narcissa was never faithful herself and that from the beginning. Every time I was in Polperro, she would dump Draco on you, which was the only way we could figure out what the fine Lady Malfoy had been doing behind my back for years. Saorise showed me a world that I had detested until then, possibly because I didn't know it and was taught that way from an early age. For the first time in my life I experienced what it means to truly love, but above all to be loved from the bottom of my heart. And just when the world was doomed and the horror was taking over, Saorise became pregnant and gave birth to this little enchanting princess on 2 March, unfortunately a month too early. You named her Senara because you were convinced that every family needs a little heroine. On the night of the second to the third of May last year I fetched Saorise to help you, Andromeda and I lacked the knowledge. She took you away, where none of us knew, and returned only minutes later. Narcissa killed her that night as revenge for my adultery. Andromeda tried to help me and fought a battle with her own sister, which she almost lost. I cannot describe the pain I felt when Saorise died in my arms, because losing her hurts to this day. I was so full of hate and anger at that moment that I did not pay attention to what I was shooting at Narcissa. In the end, the Whomping Willow did its job and broke her neck. So both my children lost their mother in the same night. I would like to talk about Saorise, but I can't, it takes my breath away. Andromeda was often with me because she was afraid I would hurt myself, but I promised Saorise one thing and that was to look after our daughter and I will do that until my last breath," I finished, even though I barely understood the last sentence myself. I pulled Senara closer to me and buried my face in her hair, breathing in her scent and forcing myself to rest.

"Do you have a picture of Saorise?" asked Severus quietly. I just nodded in response and pulled my backpack towards me. Since the end of the war, I avoided using magic and only used it in extreme emergencies.

"Here, this is the only thing I could find where you are pictured together," I said quietly and pressed two pictures into his hand, which I had packed spontaneously, should Severus ask for them. Severus frowned briefly and looked at the second picture more closely.

"I assume this is Senara as a newborn?" he asked, smiling slightly.

"Yes, Senara stole her godfather's heart within seconds. I was surprised, you only picked Draco up when he was two. You almost didn't want to give this little princess back, even though she was much smaller and more fragile," I replied, leaning against the wall. Sitting on the floor, especially with a sleeping baby on my chest, was anything but comfortable.

"I'd like to remember, but it's like the other pictures. The people in them look familiar, but I can't place them. I hate it when someone touches me, but I had no problem being hugged by Andromeda or supported by you. You know what I mean? Deep down I know who you are, yet I don't recognise you. I am so sorry for what happened to you, because I can see how much you are suffering, even if you try to hide it from me. I would like to know more, but there is time. When you are ready to talk about it, I will listen. Who knows, maybe one day I will remember. Earlier in the street, when you mentioned Senara's name, a scene appeared in my mind's eye, probably from the past. Now that I know the story of Senara, I can relate to it," he said, sounding slightly exasperated. Perhaps this was not his first memory of the past. I still didn't know how wise it would be to tell Severus everything, maybe I should talk to Andromeda first.