haterz are our motivatorz
[Number Neighbours!!!]
[Saturday 28 September 9:04 pm]
cotton eye jim : WOO HOO PARTY
cotton eye jim : LETS GO PARTY PEOPLE!! PRE’S ARE AT MINE!!
mf starboy : im going to get absolutely paralytic i cannot wait
ronald : ME TOO FINALLY THIS WEEK SUCKED ASS
team jacob : Why are you like this
ronald : like what bitch
merida : borderline alcoholics
mf starboy : well you see
mf starboy : i was born into a loveless marriage.
remy : and made in the royal navy💪⛴️🏴
marley and me : LMAO
ronald : is a girl not allowed to enjoy a few vodka cranberries every now and again
marley and me : not when you throw up in the uber which is charged to my account
ronald : SHUT UP I LITERALLY PAID YOU BACK??
ronald : ne ways haterz
ronald : jimmy what time do u want us to come over
cotton eye jim : now!!
cotton eye jim : pete and lily are here already and we’re gonna book the uber at 10:45ish
merida : james i said im driving idm honestly
cotton eye jim : leave ur car at mine its fine!!!
cotton eye jim : you can just stay over at mine as well if you don’t feel like ubering back!!!!
[simp2 to simp]
[Saturday 28 September 9:21 pm]
simp2 : was that super chill and cool and not sounding like i desperately want to spend time with her
simp2 : pls say yes
simp2 : lie to me if you have to but pls say yes
simp2 : i’ll kms if you dont say yes
simp : well now i feel i have to say yes.
simp2 : FINE
simp2 : TELL ME THE TRUTH. I CAN BEAR IT
simp : you were fine honestly just maybe ease up on the exclamation marks
simp2 : got it thanks will do.
simp : christ im omw now just be chill
[Number Neighbours!!!]
[Saturday 28 September 9:47 pm]
mf starboy : i have arrived
mf starboy : let me in
remy : coming!!
mf starboy : i bear gifts😈
marley and me : ITS A BOMB
marley and me : PETER SIT DOWN RIGHT NOW
mf starboy : peter shes joking let me in
marley and me : PETER DO U WANT US ALL TO DIE
mf starboy : PETER ITS JUST TEQUILA I HAVE NOT GOT A BOMB LET ME IN
remy : AAAAAAAAAAA I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO
mf starboy : PETER COME BACK NO OMG
mf starboy : marlene mckinnon count ur days bitch im fucking freezing out here
marley and me : teehee
team jacob : Ffs Sirius wait there I’ll come let you in
mf starboy : oh hey i didnt know u were here already
team jacob : You’re the last one here we’ve all been waiting on you dumbass
mf starboy : it takes time to look this good
mf starboy : im not brave enough to rock the “troll living under a bridge look”
mf starboy : shoutout marlene tho i admire her bravery❤️
marley and me : kys❤️
mf starboy : mwah xox
marley and me : oh poo some one let him in
cotton eye jim : guys be nice :(
merida : give them 5 minutes and some shots and they’ll be making up another secret handshake
mf starboy : OMG YES MARLEY DO U REMEMBER OUR ONE FROM LAST WEEK!!
marley and me : YESSS OMG WAIT GET IN HERE WE NEED TO SHOW REMUS
merida : told u theyd be fine
[lily to remus]
[Saturday 28 September 10:48 pm]
lily : ok so you’re going w sirius and marley in the uber
remus : What
remus : Why???
lily : because im already dealing with mary james and peter
lily : you can deal with tweedledee and tweedledum
remus : Why cant you take one of them and I’ll take James or Mary
lily : bc i dont have the energy to separate them.
remus : Ok then let me take the other 3
lily : remus.
lily : i am not dealing w sirius whining about missing u the entire uber ride there ok?
lily : you are taking thing 1 and thing 2. end of.
remus : Ok mum🙄
lily : good.
lily : now get them in the car and try not to fuck up james’ uber rating xx
remus : Sigh.
[Number Neighbours!!!]
[Saturday 28 September 11:02 pm]
team jacob : I have arrived.
team jacob : Lost Marlene the second we stepped inside still have Sirius with me
merida : aww
team jacob : I’m holding his hair back in the bathroom. This is not a cute moment
cotton eye jim : hwat??!?? i just saw sirus
cotton eye jim : but he cut his hair???
cotton eye jim : when???
ronald : james babe i think thats his brother
cotton eye jim : but. they look the samw?????
ronald : james thehre related
merida : oh my god this is painful
cotton eye jim : hmmm
remy : WHAT REGULUA IS BERE???
cotton eye jim : petey turn arond. hes therw
remy : jimmy my boy.
remy : stay here
cotton eye jim : huh???????!???!)?
cotton eye jim : hwat is happoning rn
cotton eye jim : petwr jusr left mw to talk tp regulum
cotton eye jim : his name is waaaaaeey too long.
ronald : since when is petew bffs with little surius
mf starboy : HUH????
ronald : oh. regular sirus is back
mf starboy : PETWRR IS BESTIED WITG MY BROWTHER????!!????
mf starboy : REMUS HELP MNE
team jacob : Sirius I am right in front of you what do you need
mf starboy : help
team jacob : Yes I gathered that but with what.
team jacob : oh
ronald : GUYS GET IN HERE PERER IS DOING RHE WORM
marley and me : WHAT WHAREE
marley and me : IM COMING HOLD UP
ronald : YES GET IT PETER
ronald : MARLEG GET HWRE NOW JAMES IS TRYIBG TO DO THE MAGIC MIKE DANCE
marley and me : WHERE OMF
marley and me : REXORD IT
ronald : obciously i am no idoit
merida : agree to disagree on that mary…
ronald : HEY!!!
merida : marlene we’re here do you not see me waving??
marley and me : OH HWY I FOIND YOO!!
merida : sure.
ronald : MARLWEYYY
merida : guys you are stood next to each other just talk
ronald : okii!!!!’!!
[remus to lily]
[Sunday 29 September 00:06 am]
remus : Hey Lily just so you know I’m taking Sirius back
remus : He’s way too drunk and I don’t think Mary’s friend will appreciate him throwing up on her carpet
remus : Sorry I can’t help you get the others back
lily : woah what
lily : thats fine dw peter is sobering up anyways
lily : are you ok?
remus : Wdym I’m fine.
lily : u sure?
remus : Yes? I just said I’m fine
lily : idk im getting distinctly not ok vibes from you are u sure ur fine like for real???
remus : Yes omfg I’m not the one who was puking my guts up why wouldnt i be fucking fine lily??
lily : woah ok chill i was just checking?
remus : Just fucking leave it ok
remus : I’ll text you tomorrow
remus : Or today or whatever
lily : ok
lily : get home safe xx
remus : You too, text me when you’re home x
[sirius to marlene]
[Sunday 29 September 10:27 am]
sirius : ok so
sirius : i remember arriving at the party with you
sirius : so im hoping you can tell me whose bed im in rn
marlene : GOOD MORNING TO YOU TOO??
sirius : marley im so fucking serious rn pls
marlene : sorry am i bb i wish i could tell u
marlene : hold up share ur location w me rn im w mary we might know where u are and can come pick u up if ur in danger
sirius : okok
sirius : [Location_shared]
marlene : …
marlene : ok so i have good news
sirius : MARLENE WHERE AM I
marlene : ok so ur not in danger
marlene : however you are at the residence of our lovely remus john lupin so idk how youll react to that
sirius : hold the mf phone
sirius : WHAT HAPPENED
marlene : BABE I WISH I COULD TELL YOU I WOULD HAVE SO MUCH BLACKMAIL OH FUCK
marlene : IM SO SORRY THIS IS SO FUNNY ME AND MARY ARE LITERALLY PEEING OURSELVES RN
sirius :YOU TOLD MARY???!???
marlene : sirius i TOLD YOU your not subtle
sirius : FUCK I THOUGHT U WERE JOKING
sirius : brb guys im gonna kms he just walked in w coffee and breakfast
marlene : damn wife him UP
sirius : IM TRYING😭
[lily to remus]
[Sunday 29 September 12:32 pm]
lily : hey my love
lily : u wanna tell me what was going on??
remus : Not really
lily : remus whats going on im worried
remus : Fine I’ll tell you
remus : Only bc I feel bad for snapping at you last night
lily : yesss i love your guilty conscience
remus : So you know how me and Sirius were absent for most of the party and then I took him home early
lily : yah regulus was pissed off abt that lol
remus : Well if Regulus wanted to deal with an extremely drunk Sirius Black I would’ve been more than happy to let him
remus : Anyway we were in the bathroom, I was holding his hair back while he was puking
remus : He then stopped and texted the groupchat a few times
remus : Then he kept asking me to help him and was mumbling something so I leant down to hear him and he kissed me
lily : WOAH
lily : WHAG
lily : DID YOU KISS HIM BACK??!???
remus : Ok when I say kiss it was like a peck
remus : And also he had just been throwing up I wasn’t going to start making out w him ew wtf
lily : ok fair thats gross
lily : wait so have u talked
remus : Well he slept in my bed so I kind of had to talk to him
lily : WOAH WHAT???
remus : LILY I TOLD YOU I WAS TAKING HIM BACK WHY ARE YOU SO SHOCKED
lily : oh actually yeah
lily : don’t know how i didn’t connect the dots there oops
lily : so what did he say
remus : About him kissing me?
lily : yeah?
remus : I didn’t tell him?
lily : wait why i’m confused
remus : Ok first of all he was already embarrassed he couldn’t even remember ending up at my house
remus : Also before you ask I slept on the sofa
lily : 😁
remus : I wasn’t going to make him more embarrassed by telling him
lily : but i thought u liked him
remus : I might have a small crush on him
lily : HAHAHAH
remus : Lily
lily : sorry was that not a joke?
remus : Anyways I’m not going to ruin any chances by making it really awkward between us
remus : And if he doesn’t even like me? What then?
lily : what if he doesnt like me is a CRAZY statement
lily : but fair enough i see ur point
lily : is he still there?
remus : No he left like 45 min ago
lily : ok im coming over and im bringing hot chocolate and my disney plus subscription
remus : I love you
lily : love you too babe i’ll see you soon xx
[Number Neighbours!!!]
[Sunday 29 September 4:23 pm]
cotton eye jim : morning my loves
merida : james it is 4 in the afternoon
cotton eye jim : and??
cotton eye jim : time isnt real lillian
merida : still has and never will be my name
remy : morning james!!
cotton eye jim : peter!! good morning my sweet boy!!
remy : you owe me 45 quid from throwing up in my uber!!
cotton eye jim : i hate you jump off a bridge.
remy : even if i do you will still owe me £45 you can just deliver it to my grieving family
cotton eye jim : ok hold up i didnt mean jump off a bridge and DIE
cotton eye jim : just break an ankle or smth?
remy : … ok sure mate.
cotton eye jim : anyway bro istg i remember nothing from last night
cotton eye jim : why do i have bruises everywhere???
ronald : oh i can help w that!
ronald : [james_attempting_the_worm.mov]
ronald : this might explain it!!
cotton eye jim : …
cotton eye jim : and none of us tried to stop me?
ronald : why would we do that?
marley and me : yeah. getting blackmail is more important soz
cotton eye jim : …
cotton eye jim : peter if u find a bridge let me go first pls
remy : ofc babe x
mf starboy : i don’t remember anything either james hahah
mf starboy : i think the last thing i remember is dancing to nsync with marley at ur house
remy : yeah sirius you were GONE
merida : wait so you remember absolutely nothing??
mf starboy : nothing.
mf starboy : nada
mf starboy : its all blank
team jacob : Well you just threw up a lot haha nothing very interesting
remy : yeah you missed out on me and james doing the worm tho
mf starboy : sorry pete
mf starboy : next time i’ll be right there cheering you on
mf starboy : or showing you up w my dance moves
remy : unlikely. i’ve seen you dance
ronald : unfortunately we’ve all been subjected to that
merida : i think your bye bye bye performance was honestly sacrilegious
mf starboy : talk to the hand haters✋
marley and me : haterz are our motivatorz💔
[simp to simp2]
[Sunday 29 September 4:58 pm]
simp : ok so
simp : i may have been lying when i said i remembered nothing
simp2: ok???
simp : basically when i was in the bathroom with remus throwing up
simp : i think i might have kissed him