October

Outside the storm was raging on, and it felt so cold. Despite being inside, huddled up in a blanket, every candle lit, every source of heat turned on, Emmeline still felt cold. She should be sweating from the heat, because she was wearing her thickest sweater too, but nothing helped her. She could feel the intensity of the storm already, and she had to prepare herself.

She could hear the sound of Mary turning off the shower from the bathroom. She’d been in there since before the storm started coming near them. She didn’t know what was coming. But Mary was brave. She’d always been a brave person. She made it through things. It was one of the things Emmeline adored the most about Mary. She would be fine.

Restless, and eager for a distraction, she decided to go make a cup of tea. She supposed that holding a burning hot cup of steaming tea could help her feel the warmth again, and feeling the warmth from every sip made her feel so much better about herself.

It didn’t help.

Instead of the warmth of the cup bringing her comfort, it stung and burnt her, making her almost drop it. Breaking the cup into a million pieces wouldn’t have been that bad either. She would at least have something to do. When she took a sip of the tea, she just felt nothing. She already felt so bad, and the storm had barely begun.

She sat down again, sinking into the couch. Outside, the sky had turned an angry grey, and the rain was aggressively pouring down from the sky. She didn’t have anything against the rain. That was comforting. She loved to just sit and watch the rain. At least on the days she didn’t think a lot. At least on the days when the sound and the sight didn’t bring her back to running barefoot through a meadow with her friends, when they got soaked from the rain, and when they were still carefree, laughing and alive. She begged her mind to stop thinking again.

Instead, she thought about how Mary came out of the bathroom. As close as one could come to perfect, and hair still wet. It brought back the memory, but a more specific part of it that still brought her joy, no matter how bad her day was. Flashes of Mary’s hair dripping wet went through her mind. Memories of leaning in, and kissing her made some type of warmth bubble up in her veins. She could only smile at Mary. Mary smiled back.

“You okay?” Mary asked. Apparently Mary had not noticed the storm.

“There’s a storm outside,” Emmeline simply stated, and turned back to the window, and looked out. She heard the shuffling of feet behind her, and slowly, Mary was sinking down into the couch next to her.

Mary turned to her with a worried expression. Emmeline turned away from her. She couldn’t make anyone worry about her, she hated it. She’d worried people enough in the last two years. She didn’t want to do it even more. Mary knew though. Mary knew her too well. To Mary, her emotions were probably reeking from her, filling the room with a smell of guilt and worry.

“Emme, look at me please,” Mary asked. It wasn’t a command though. She wouldn’t bother Emmeline. Not if Emmeline didn’t want to. “It’s so warm in here, you should be boiling right now.”

“I feel like our flat has turned into ice, and I’m the only living thing in it.” Emmeline’s breath was shaky, and she couldn’t really understand why. Nothing bad had happened yet. She had no reason to be as anxious as she was about what could come later. So why was she?

Mary gave her a comforting smile. “Want me to be your sun? You know, help melting the ice apartment?” she joked. Emmeline nodded, but she wasn’t joking. She really felt like Mary was her sun. They never fought, even during the hardest times, like some of their friends had with their respective partners. No, they just held each other, and hoped that someday things would get better. Mary made things better. Mary was warm, bright, and colourful. Mary was everything she needed.

Mary put her arms around Emmeline, bringing her close. Emmeline sighed into it. She could feel some of her warmth returning to her body, and just hoped that she didn’t steal it from Mary, but that they were simply just sharing. Mary pressed a kiss on top of Emmeline’s head, and they stayed like that for a while.

-

Emmeline woke up, startled by the loud sound she’d just heard. She looked around herself, like a lost animal trying to find their home. Her home was Mary, and Mary was falling to the ground.

It wasn’t just her that was startled by the noise, Mary was too. That usually meant that something was very wrong. Emmeline continued looking around her, and eventually she found the window. Outside the window, the storm was worse, and a bright flashing light appeared, and disappeared immediately.

Lightning. Thunder.

There hadn’t been a hint of thunder since the war ended. The weather had been rather peaceful. However now, the calm was over, and Emmeline could feel everything rushing back to her.

The sight of a house blowing up in front of her. A place where people lived, where people had grown up, was suddenly just flames, ashes, and burnt wood.

The sound of a scream. Of screams everywhere. Screams of pleasure. A Death Eater had just killed someone. Screams of pain and torture. A muggleborn was once again tortured. Screams sounding like Lily and Mary, both of them being captured and tortured at the same time. Screams of grief and mourning. Someone had just lost their partner. A child. A best friend. Multiple best friends. Multiple people they loved. They’d just been there, and then they were gone.

The sight of blood on her hands. Her own blood, from a wound caused by a particularly bad spell. Blood from others. People that she helped to their feet again. Blood from others that she couldn’t save. The blood of her friends that she’d hugged tightly, but that could never hug her back because they were gone.

The sound of cries. All tragic. The most present memory being when they found out that almost everyone had died, and both Mary and Emmeline fell to their knees and felt their worlds tear apart. Disintegrate into nothing. The sound of Remus’ cries, almost screams, from when he found out what Sirius had done. When he tried to deny it all he could, but it hit him later that Sirius had done it. How Mary and Emmeline had to hold him and act like they were stronger. As if they didn’t feel just like how Remus felt.

The look of tears streaming down people’s faces. When she looked at Mary now, tears were streaming down her face, and she knew that Mary was thinking about the same stuff as she did.

Another strike of lightning, and a new sound of thunder arrived. Both of them flinched, both of them held onto the other, and desperately wished that they could escape. Escape to a world where everything was fine. Emmeline thought about how in another parallel universe, they were probably fine. She cursed the universe everyday for not letting her live in one of those universes.

They laid there, grasping onto each other. Clinging, and wishing that the thunder would go away, because everytime it felt like a building would explode, and they couldn’t do anything.

Despite being completely shaken, and barely being able to move, she kissed away the tears that were still streaming down Mary’s lovely cheeks. Mary stroked her thumb over Emmeline’s own tears, gently, and she knew that they would make it.

At some point, everything got calm, and Emmeline fell asleep.