01 | Safe
For a Slytherin, Regulus Arcturus Black was loyal to a fault. Loyal to the disgusting standards of his parents, despite the fact that he was still just a boy. A scared boy that was abandoned by his brother and left to be the heir to the Black name.
He held on as long as he could to the absurd expectations of Walburga and Orion Black. The parents from hell. But enough was enough. Nearly 16 years of manipulation and abuse was what it took for Regulus to finally break free. The last 24 hours felt like a terrifying nightmare and yet the greatest dream. It was like he was waiting for them to push him over the edge. Like he needed a good enough reason to finally rid himself of the torment of being their son. He had nothing but the rain soaked clothes on his back as he paced the street a few times. ‘Is this what it was like for Sirius?’ He contemplated as he tried to avoid the encounter in front of him. If he were to knock on the door, nothing from the moment he left his house could be undone, but if he returned he had to put aside the last bit of innocence he had left… if there was any. Part of him hoped that someone in the house would spot him as he paced the pavement and usher him inside, that way he didn’t have to decide on his own what the right choice was.
Regulus stared up at the two storey home. It was a sky blue interruption to the drab conformity on either side. Regulus had worried briefly as he walked that he wouldn’t be able to find the Potter’s home but the very idea seems silly now that he looks up at it. The yard was scattered with muggle sports equipment and the gardens on either side of the steps were filled to the brim with bright bursts of colourful blooms. This home felt nothing like the cold, dreary terraced house he was used to and he was almost positive the inside would be the exact same way. The soft hum of a sleeping city at his back urged him forward. Moments passed and no one came. He had to take this step on his own. No one was coming to save him, he had to do that himself. So he pushed all the doubt aside and began up the cobblestone path toward the house. A light in an upstairs room turned on and suddenly Regulus could see the silhouette of two boys dancing behind the curtains. He would recognise the long haired one anywhere. His brother. He was shimmying to the faint music Regulus could hear, as the other boy began jumping around like a madman. James Potter.
The thought of ruining their happy night was enough for Regulus to turn around and walk back down the stone steps.
“Regulus?” The boy froze. “Dear, what are you doing here at this hour?” This hour, being just past 9pm. Euphemia Potter was standing at the door with a book in one hand and a mug in the other.
“Last year, after my brother began living here, you sent me a letter.” His fingers brushed the worn edges of the parchment in his trouser pocket. Regulus didn’t know how to get out the next words. Asking for help was never something Walburga and Orion accepted from their sons. Asking for help was a sign of weakness. But the comforting smile on James’ mum’s lips and the way she stood half in the rain just to speak to him made him feel like it was okay. Euphemia wasn’t the type to hit a child, with a curse or with her hands. She was the type to listen and comfort a child in need. He had never met her officially, but he had seen her at Hogwarts a few times or at Diagon Alley with James. If she was someone that made Sirius Black feel safe, maybe she wouldn’t mind. “I was wondering if it was too late to take you up on that offer?” The offer of a bed and a home where he didn’t have to be scared. Where he could be safe and loved.
“Of course not! Come inside! You must be absolutely freezing!” He was, despite it being mid June. Every muscle in his body was shaking as the rain poured down harder and the wind swept past him. Regulus was used to the cold, but the warmth as he stepped into the home was something he had never felt before. Not only was there a fire going in the fireplace, but the home was filled with warm comforting colours from the red and gold floral wallpaper to the brown sofa and chairs, unlike the dark and cold home in which he grew up.
“Oh, Hello Regulus.” James’ father, Fleamont, was sitting on the sofa with a cup of coffee in one hand and a stack of papers strewed out on the table in front of him. His hair was a mess of dark curls, like his sons, but much shorter. To Regulus he actually looked alot like an older version of James. Same warm skin, same welcoming smile.
“Hello Mr. Potter.”
“Sirius didn’t mention you were coming by. Have you eaten?”
“Yes, I uh, I didn’t tell him. I didn’t have much time to.” Regulus didn’t know how to put the last few hours into words. From breakfast to just before the meeting the dread of his future was building, until he found himself running down the street as fast as he could to the only place he could think to go.
“Monty, Regulus will be staying with us.” Mrs. Potter smiled sweetly at her husband, clearly trying to mask any sign of worry she had in front of the boy. Regulus didn’t see the point. They should be worried. Someone may come after him. He could be putting them in danger. Hell, he could be getting them killed.
“Oh good! I’m sure the boys will be delighted to hear this!” Fleamont grinned that famous Potter grin.
“Let me show you upstairs. Let’s get you a hot shower and some dry clothes.” Euphemia smiles softly, leading Regulus across the living room and upstairs. The music the older boys were dancing to is much clearer now, but Regulus couldn’t place the song. It sounded like one of those muggle songs Sirius was always showing him. “Monty has completely taken over the second spare room with his work, so for tonight we can put you in one of the boys’ rooms.”
Regulus didn’t say anything other than a quiet thank you as she led him to the bathroom, handed him a towel, and showed him how the shower worked, before leaving. He liked that she didn’t pry about why he was there and he was glad she didn’t ask about the way he had a slight limp when he walked. He didn’t think he would have been able to tell her about the day he had.
***
For the first 15 minutes Regulus was in the bathroom, he just stood there in his wet clothes. He couldn’t even get himself to move, stuck in thought about the events of the day. Specifically how it began.
“It is time that you join us for a meeting with the dark lord.” His fathers voice was steady, like saying this was a casual conversation starter over breakfast. Their eyes don’t even meet, Regulus was seated in the middle of the long dining table with a parent at each end. These were the first words spoken other than an ignored ‘Good Morning” from Regulus.
“I’ve gone to meetings before.” Anytime a meeting was held at their home, Regulus was forced to attend.
“You have gone as our son. It is time that you go as a follower. You are the heir to the Black name and you must show you know how to handle this responsibility.” His mothers voice was sharp, but that wasn’t unusual. There was never a soft moment anymore, maybe there never was. If there was one, Regulus couldn’t recall it. “It will be expected that you receive the mark.” Regulus’ eyes go wide before he forces his face neutral again. She caught his moment of panic and her jaw tightened, as did her hand around her glass. “If he senses even the slightest bit of disloyalty from you, he will question our faith in him. I will not let a weak child ruin what I have built for this family. Do I make myself clear?”
“Yes, Mother.” If there was one thing Regulus had gotten good at over the years, it was saying what he thought Walburga Black wanted to hear. “I will not let you down.”
Without another word she stood and left the room. Somehow the silent room grew even quieter as Regulus and his father finished their meal. Not a word was spoken between them until Orion stood from his seat at the head of the table.
“If you embarrass us tonight, you will be as welcome in this home as Sirius is. So choose your actions wisely.” He didn’t even give Regulus time to respond before he was yelling for the house elves to clean up and heading to his study.
The water was so hot it nearly burned through Regulus’ skin. By the time he was done with his shower, his pale skin was practically red. It was like he was trying to thaw out all of the coldness that was forced into him as a child.
He wrapped the towel tightly around him as he realised he had no clothes to put on, and was stuck in a towel. Was he meant to stay and wait for clothes, or go in nothing but a towel and find something?
His conundrum was solved by a soft knock on the door.
“Reggie?” It was James. Of course it wasn’t his brother. Why would Sirius want anything to do with him? He left him after all. “I’ve brought you some clothes. It’s mine, so it may not fit the best.” Regulus rolls his eyes at this. Sure, James was more built than him, but they were practically the same height. “I’m gonna place it on the counter. My eyes are closed.” James does as he says before shutting the door.
Staring at himself in the mirror, Regulus is utterly annoyed at how pathetic he looks. Sure enough the black tshirt looks like it has eaten Regulus whole and he had to tighten the grey cotton trousers as tight as he could to keep them from falling. His loose curls were flattened over his forehead, giving him the appearance of a drowned rat.
It took him another 10 minutes to work up the courage to walk out of the room. The second the bathroom door was closed behind him there is a body slamming into him and arms wrapping tightly around his waist.
“Sirius.” Regulus grunts into his brother's ear, trying to push him off. It’s no use though because it just causes him to latch on tighter. It felt like eternity to Regulus before Sirius finally pulled back. He kept his hands on Regulus' shoulders so their eyes were locked together. This was the closest they had stood since Sirius left the Black house. Sure, Regulus had seen him at school, but he avoided Sirius and his friends as best he could.
“What did they do?” Sirius looked like he feared the worst as he asked.
Regulus said nothing. What was he supposed to say? This was the exact reason Sirius left as well. He knew Regulus’ situation better than anyone. “Did they want you to get the mark?” Regulus stiffened and Sirius had his answer.
“Those monsters, they really will drive away all the family they have if it means they can still worship a fucking mad-man!”
“Language, Sirius.” Euphemia said, giving Sirius a proper disappointed mother glare.
“My deepest apologies, Effy.” Sirius did the fakest apologetic look then turned to James and giggled, which made her smile.
“You boys should settle in for the night. I’m sure Regulus has had quite the day.” The older boys agreed and James went to his room to turn off the music. “For the night Sirius can stay with James in his room, since he has a larger bed, and Regulus, you can stay in Sirius’ Room. We can get your room settled tomorrow and go get you some of your own clothes. Some that fit you.” She finished with a smile as she led Regulus down the hall to his brother's room.
It was so different from Sirius' room back at Grimmauld Place. The walls were not a dreary grey, but instead were a bright white, every inch covered in posters or pictures of his friends. There was also a guitar leaning against the desk that held a record player and a large array of vinyls. There was no doubt in his mind that this was Sirius Blacks home . But could it be his?