Harry .
Biting through the searing pain, Hermione rose to her feet taking in the destruction all around her. It was as if an explosion had happened, the fallout all around her. The battle was no longer in that room, though she could hear it going on outside. She had to get to Harry. He needed her. Without thinking twice, her feet began to move. One breath. Another Breath . She just had to make it to Harry.
She opened another door and found herself in the midst of an ongoing battle. To her relief, she could see that the Order had shown up and was fighting back against the Death Eaters. Harry would be alright, he had to be alright.
Her eyes tried to see through the room as colorful curses and spells flew from wands all around her. Sirius was dueling against Bellatrix who had just knocked Tonks unconscious. Kingsley Shacklebolt was battling against another Deatheater. Her eyes finally found Harry who was being confronted by Lucius Malfoy as Neville stood by his side ready to defend. She had to get to him. She began to make her way down the stone steps as quickly as she could but before she could make it, Professor Lupin jumped it to duel Malfoy and was screaming for Harry and Neville to get out of there.
Hermione continued to try to get to him, even as Albus Dumbledore arrived, successfully rounding up the Deatheaters as he made his way through the room. She could see that Harry was unfocused, he was distracted by Sirius still fighting against Bellatrix. He was worried, she could tell by the look on his face. Determined, she changed course and made her way toward Sirius and Bellatrix. She reached for her wand and gripped it tightly as she listened to the sounds of Sirius taunting his cousin, dodging and ducking every spell she was throwing at him. She remembered how Remus had told them once how deft at dueling Sirius was, that he was one of the best in their class aside from James. She could understand it now, seeing him in action. He would be a formidable opponent to anyone he came across.
In one moment though, everything came to a blinding halt. A curse fell from Belltrix’s lips and Hermione’s eyes widened. Sirius had been distracted looking at Harry and didn’t have his shield up. The curse was going to hit him. Harry couldn’t lose another person in his life. He wouldn’t survive it. Without a second thought, Hermione’s wand arm rose and she screamed, “PROTEGO!”
A strong shield was erected in front of Sirius, so strong that as Bellatrix’s curse hit and rebounded, it caused Sirius to be blown back and lose his balance. “NO!” she screamed as she watched him fall backward. Her feet were moving before she had time to process what she was doing. All she knew was she had to save him. She was the only one that could save him.
“HERMIONE!” she heard Harry scream but she was running out of time. Sirius was going to fall through the veil and he was going to be lost to Harry forever. She pushed her legs to run harder, faster. The adrenaline coursed through her body, as she reached the Marauder, grabbing onto his arm and pulling him away from the Veil as a cry of pain fell from her lips. As she pulled him forward, the momentum in her body kept her moving. She quickly realized that while she had stopped Sirius Black from falling into the veil, there was nothing that was going to stop her. I love you, Harry … Closing her eyes she felt herself fall. There was no more pain, no more fear. It was all over.
No.
The world stopped as Harry watched in horror as Hermione’s body ran straight into the Veil, disappearing from his sight. He couldn’t breathe. Hermione, his Hermione was gone. Vanished. She would come out on the other side. She had to come out. As the minutes ticked by though, there was nothing. No one. Sirius was staring at the Veil in horror and Bellatrix was laughing gleefully. No .
“Hermione!” he yelled, his feet hurtling him towards the dais. He had to get to her. He had to. He started to run towards the Veil, determined that she was just stuck. He would get her out. He would help her. She was only lost. He could save her. He just had to-
Remus wrapped his arms around his chest, pulling him towards him his heart cracking in his chest for what he had to do. “There’s nothing you can do Harry-”
“I have to help her! I have to save her! She just went through!” Harry screamed, thrashing against the man keeping him from saving her.
“It’s too late Harry…” Remus whispered, his voice cracking. His arms held onto him tighter as he locked eyes with Sirius who was making his way over to him with a horrified expression.
“I can reach her! I need her!” Harry screamed, viciously fighting against the werewolf who held him rightly to him.
“There’s nothing you can do pup,” Sirius whispered, taking Harry’s face gently in his hands, forcing his godson to look him in the eyes. “Harry… she’s gone…”
“NO!” he screamed, trying to remove himself from their grasp. They didn’t understand. People hid behind the Veil, he had heard the whispers himself. She was hurt and she needed him.
“Harry… she can’t come back,” Sirius continued his voice breaking as his grip on him remained firm. “She’s gone… she can’t come back because she’s d-”
“SHE’S NOT DEAD!” Harry roared. “DON’T SAY SHE’S DEAD!”
“We have to move,” Remus muttered and Sirius nodded as they pulled him away from the Veil. The battle continued to rage around them but he couldn’t care less. He was angry. How could they not realize? Why didn’t they understand? Hermione would never leave him. She was always by his side, always his constant companion. She wouldn’t just…
Then it hit him. Hermione had been unconscious when they had left her in the brain room. She must have come to and immediately came for him. She always came for him… she wouldn’t hide. She would have risked everything, again, to get back to him.
“She’s gone Harry… I’m so sorry…”
His body stilled the moment the words fell from his godfather’s lips. She’s gone. Nothing you can do. It’s too late. An agonizing scream fell from his lips as his body went limp against Remus’s chest. Sirius’s heart immediately shattered at the sound of pure grief that came out of his boy. His eyes locked with Remus, not knowing what to do, or how to help him. It wasn’t until the sound of Bellatrix’s cackling that the three men snapped back to reality. In a brief moment of shock, Harry ripped out of their hold and took off after Bellatrix.
She was the reason Hermione was gone. She was the reason he would never see her breathtaking smile or hear her laugh that never failed to warm his heart even on his darkest of days. It was all her fault and she was going to pay.
“Harry no!” Remus shouted.
“SHE KILLED HERMIONE!” Harry bellowed. “SHE’S GONE! And now I’m going to kill her.”
June 21, 1996
Harry shot up in bed, gasping for air as Sirius and Remus rushed into the room. He looked at them, trying to catch his breath. They weren’t the faces he wanted to see though. They weren’t her. Hermione . He needed Hermione. Sirius sat beside him, brushing his hair from his eyes. “It’s ok pup. You’re awake.”
“Hermione,” Harry choked out. He needed to see her, needed to know the nightmare wasn’t real. “I need to talk to Hermione. Is she here?”
“Harry…” Remus said gently. “She’s… she’s gone. Remember?”
“Gone,” Harry repeated, everything rushed back to him in a blur. Dolohov cursed her… then she reappeared again and saved Sirius. Then… “She’s gone…”
“We still have time before we have to go to her funeral. You should rest pup…”
Harry choked back his tears as he stared at Sirius. He was right. Her funeral was today. They were supposed to say goodbye… but he didn’t know how.
“Harry… do you want to talk about it?” Remus asked gently, watching the young man who looked so much like his best friend closely.
“How am I supposed to say goodbye to the one person that… that never left my side,” Harry choked out, tears falling from his eyes. “I was a horrible friend to her… I hurt her so many times and she still kept coming back to me. She never lost faith in me no matter how many times I was a foul git to her. I… I killed her.”
“Harry no,” Sirius shook his head vehemently. “No, you didn’t.”
“She begged me to listen to her,” Harry cried, his breathing labored as tears streamed down his face. “She tried to get me to listen to her. She tried to tell me it was all a trick and that it was Voldemort in my head but I didn’t listen. I wouldn’t listen to her. It’s my fault. I… I killed her. I loved her and I… It’s my fault. She’s dead because of me.”
Sirius gathered the boy in his arms, hugging him fiercely as he sobbed. All Remus could do was watch him helplessly. He knew the pain of losing a best friend all too well. There was nothing he could say that would make any of this easier for Harry. No words would bring her back to him. It was a pain in his heart he would always have to bear.
The three men stayed there, huddled together until it was time that they had to leave. When they arrived for the service, none were surprised to see the large turnout that had come to say their goodbyes to the Witch that had touched so many lives with her presence. Sirius and Remus never left his side throughout the whole service. Harry listened to the words that spewed from the mouths of people who knew her and loved her. But they were all wrong. None of the words spoken could convey even a fraction of the worth of Hermione Granger or the love Harry felt in his soul for her. She was his everything and she was gone. It should have been him. He would have given anything for it to be him instead.
May 2, 1998
"Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and above all, those who live without love. By returning, you may ensure that fewer souls are maimed, and fewer families are torn apart. If that seems to you a worthy goal, then we must say goodbye for the present."
Harry nodded and sighed. Goodbye. He was always saying goodbye and yet… he didn’t get to say goodbye to the one person he longed to."Tell me one last thing," said Harry, "Is this real? Or has this been happening inside my head?"
"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean it is not real?"
With a deep breath, Harry nodded his head and stood, knowing that he had to go back. He had to finish this for good. For her . It was all for her. She would have wanted him to end this nightmare. Hermione would have fought bravely by his side, never giving up on him. When it had all been over, he would have taken her in her arms and never let her go. But now… all he could do was finish this for her.
“Oh and Harry,” Dumbledore spoke again, causing him to turn around. “Before you go, there is one more thing you need to do.”
“What’s that Professor?” he asked.
“Harry,” a voice breathed and his entire body stilled. He knew that voice, it was the same voice that haunted his dreams. Slowly, he turned towards the voice, terrified of what he might find. There she stood, in all white with an ethereal glow about her. Hermione . She was even more beautiful than he had remembered. Slowly, his feet made their way to her, his eyes never leaving hers as she smiled brightly at him. She held out her hand and he took it, reveling in the feel of her.
“Hermione… is it… is it really you?” Harry whispered, unwilling to take his eyes off of hers.
“Of course it’s me,” she said softly, leading him to a bench away from the Horcrux that lay dying. “Did you really think I would miss this chance to see you?”
Harry couldn’t help the laugh that fell from his lips as a tear slid down his cheek. “I’ve missed you so much.”
“I’ve missed you too Harry,” she smiled, giving his hand a squeeze. “We never did get a chance to say goodbye properly did we?”
“I’m so sorry Hermione,” Harry whispered. “I’m so sorry. I… it’s my fault. You would still be here with me if I had just listened.”
“Hush,” she exclaimed. “It is not your fault Harry James Potter. I made my choices and I would make the same ones again. I couldn’t let you lose another father figure. You needed Sirius… you and Professor Lupin.”
“It’s a bit sickeningly how in love they are isn’t it?” Harry laughed as Hermione wiped a tear from his cheek.
“I think it’s sweet,” she smiled. “Star-crossed lovers finally getting to be together. It’s very poetic. Everyone loves an epic love story.”
“You were my epic love,” Harry whispered, looking at her as more tears fell.
“And you were mine,” she murmured softly as she leaned forward and kissed him gently. Harry could feel every ounce of love she poured into it, just as he poured his love and devotion for her into the kiss. “But it’s not time for you to join me yet. Not when you have so much life to live…”
“It’s not worth living without you Hermione… how am I supposed to go on?” Harry cried. “I go back and I kill Voldemort and what? I live my life alone?”
“Don’t say that,” she spoke, running her fingers through her hair. “You have so much love to give Harry. You just have to let it in.”
“I don’t want to,” he shook his head. “It wouldn’t be you…”
“Harry… I’m always with you. I’ve been with you every step of the way. Do you think I would stop now?”
“Don’t make me do this…”
“It’s time to say goodbye, Harry…”
“I’ll love you forever Hermione Granger…”
“And I, you Harry Potter.”
September 19, 2006
“Happy Birthday Hermione,” Harry said softly as he placed the bouquet of daffodils on her tombstone. Settling himself on the ground, the Auror took a deep breath, letting the beginnings of the fall wind kiss his skin as he took in the day. The sun was shining beautifully as if it knew what today was. He had been nervous all morning about coming. Sirius and Remus had even offered to come with him but he knew he had to do this on his own.
“Draco told me that daffodils represented new beginnings and rebirth,” Harry continued, shrugging off his cloak and scratching his beard. “He said they represented you perfectly because they were strong and resilient, just like you. Personally, I think he’s lost the plot but it is Malfoy.”
In the years that had passed since the war, Harry had buried himself in his Auror training. To his surprise, he had been partnered with Draco Malfoy, a ploy by Tonks no doubt. He hated every moment of it and pushed back any chance he got. It wasn’t until a particular case hit too close to home that he let Draco Malfoy in. They had been called to the scene of a murder and there in the grass lay a woman that looked so like Hermione that Harry had been physically ill and had to be taken back to the ministry. Draco had walked into Harry tearing apart his office and stayed with him through his entire breakdown. They had been close ever since. “He was able to finally get the House Elf welfare act passed. It’s not the freedom you always wanted for them but they will be in a much better place now than they were before. He worked really hard on it… he knew how important it was to you.”
“Mia is doing… well she’s Mia,” Harry laughed, running his fingers through his hair. “She’s smart as a whip and she seems to be running circles around Remus and Sirius. Just like her namesake I suppose… you were always running circles around me. Gods Hermione… seeing them as fathers… it’s so wonderful.”
Sighing, he closed his eyes. This was going to be the hard part.
“I… when you told me I still had so much life to live I didn’t want to believe you,” he whispered, letting the breeze take his words as it blew through the air. “You were everything I wanted and you were gone. I... I couldn’t see through my grief for so long Hermione… but then Draco introduced me to Theo. He’s… you would love him, Hermione. He’s brilliant and kind and… he has a wicked sense of humor. He keeps me on my toes… just like you did.
“No one could ever replace you Mione… but I… I love him. I really do. He’s asked me to move in with him. Wants to get a place together, someone just the two of us to start our future together. It hurts sometimes knowing that I can’t have that future with you but Theo… he makes the nights easier to bear.
“He wanted to come with me today you know? But he said I needed to do this alone. He understands… that I need to do this. I have to come and see you. He knows it’s a part of me and he accepts that, he understands all of me sometimes more than even I understand myself. I think I’m going to marry him one day, Mione. And I know you’re ok with that because all you’ve ever wanted is to see me happy. And I am happy…”
The sound of laughter filled the air and Harry couldn’t help the small smile that graced his face as he chuckled. He knew it was impossible but he knew that laugh. Her laugh .
“One day I’ll see you again love and I’ll tell you all about the trouble he and I get into. I know I’ll see you again…I’ll always find you in every life, including whatever comes after. You’re my epic love, Hermione Granger…. Happy Birthday beautiful. I’ll see you in my dreams.”