Chapter Five
“We need to move camp.”
Draco glanced up from the book he’d been reading. “Beg pardon?”
“We’ve been here too long already. Plus, now that you’ve been to Hogsmeade… anyways, even if no one saw you, I don’t like being this close to a wizarding town. There’s too many risks, we need to go somewhere more isolated.” Granger looked at him expectantly, hands on her hips.
“Alright,” he said slowly. “Before we go, let’s make one more trip to Hogsmeade. I can leave money if it makes your blasted sense of honor feel better –“
“I’ve already thought about that,” she said, businesslike. “You said there’s hardly any patrols mid-morning, right? I’m going to transfigure some of my features for security and make the trip myself. It’ll only take a few galleons to stock up for at least three weeks – I’ve gotten quite good at managing on a budget. You’ll be in charge of keeping watch – we’ll pack up camp tonight so that when I’m back, we can leave right away.”
“Hang on,” Draco said, frowning. “You’re going into Hogsmeade?”
“Well, seeing as you don’t have a wand and it was extremely foolish of you to go undisguised, yes I am.” Granger glared at him, daring him to prod more.
He took the bait. “Granger, you practically broke down when you learned I’d gone –
“Because it was dangerous! You could’ve been seen, we both could’ve been killed! I’ve weighed the options now, and… and it’s worth some risk, I admit, there’s not much to be found in the forest at this time of year – but there’s a proper, safer way to go about it, and I’d feel much better about doing it myself! Disguised, and with a wand!” Her cheeks were flushed with defiance.
He regarded her coolly. “Fine.” He turned back to his book. If that was the way she was going to look at the matter, then fine. Lord her logical, superior thinking over him… like he’d had a fucking choice in handling the matter.
“Fine?” Her voice was small and uncertain.
Draco snapped the book shut and glared at her. “What do you want, Granger? Oh, gee, I’d never thought about that! You’re so smart, Granger - you gave me the choice of starving to death or taking a calculated risk, and you’re still acting like I’m stupid even though, given your state when I first got here, you’d probably be fucking dead if I hadn’t gone! Besides, Granger,” his voice was deadly. “Whose fault is it that I didn’t have a wand?”
He watched in satisfaction as her expression grew defensive. Here we go. He stood up, stalking closer to her. “Honestly, Granger. What kind of person sends someone who specifically came to them for protection out beyond the protective enchantments with no way to defend themselves, not even a way to contact you in case something happened?” Her eyes grew wide as he moved closer still.
“What an oversight that was for Hermione Granger,” he said softly. “Or – did you think about it? Did you weigh the risks beforehand, maybe think it better if I were caught and killed alone? I know those enchantments you put on the camp, Granger, I’ve seen them before – I couldn’t have revealed your location if I’d wanted to. You would’ve been safe.” He studied her eyes, noticing for the first time just how close he’d gotten. He could see every gold fleck in her wide brown eyes as they stared up at him.
“Would you have cared if I’d died, Granger?” It came out a whisper, with a little bit more sincerity than Draco would have liked.
She blinked, snapping out of that mesmerized stare. Granger cleared her throat. “If you must know, it was an oversight.” She sniffed haughtily, meeting his eyes in defiance. “I’d never hope for someone to die – even someone as horrible as you can be. And I’ve corrected the oversight,” she added. “By going myself this time. I took the time and weighed the risks –
“Yeah, you told me.” Draco resumed a bored, lofty tone as he returned to his seat on the couch in front of the fire. Where he could no longer distinguish the colors in her eyes, to his disappointment. What the fuck?
“You talk like you want me to trust you.”
What?
“What?” He twisted to face her again, and found her with her arms crossed over her chest, examining him pensively.
“You do. Just now – when you’re telling me why you chose to go to Hogsmeade. But also…” she frowned. “Is that why you were angry last night?”
Draco smoothed his face into a look of what he hoped was bored indifference. Because that’s how he should feel right now. “I don’t know what you mean. I was angry because you brought up my family –
“No, you were angry when you came out of the tent. Before that, actually – you’d been angry ever since I slammed that book shut when you came back from Hogsmeade.” She tilted her head, looking at him curiously. “I’m right, aren’t I?”
He crossed his arms defensively. “And why the fuck would I want you to trust me?”
It was a non-answer, and from the glint in her eyes he knew she caught it.
“Because you don’t know what to think anymore,” she whispered.
It fell heavy in the room, dampening the charged atmosphere and leaving Draco speechless.
“I’m not there yet,” she continued softly. “A lot has happened. I just… I need time. You do too.”
Silence fell over them again. In a way, it was a relief, for it meant that she wasn’t saying those damn things anymore – looking straight through him and telling him what she saw to boot.
“I’ll help pack up camp.” His tone was final as he stared into the fire. Without another word from either of them, he rose and stalked out of the tent.
****
Hermione sighed deeply, flopping down onto the space where Malfoy had been lounging minutes before.
Had she pushed too far? She hadn’t planned to say those things – it wasn’t until midway through their conversation that she’d started to put the puzzle pieces together with his defensive moods and angry outbursts. She was positive she was right – she’d known he knew she was lying when she told him she’d been researching defensive spells from the way his face had gone carefully blank. And when he’d defended his choice to go to Hogsmeade – she felt a twinge of guilt for the way she’d brought that up. She’d allowed herself to get flustered, and had hardly thought through her decision to send him off empty handed. But with all that had happened in the past twenty four hours, could she really blame herself?
Yes.
Malfoy was right, he could’ve been killed and she’d never have known.
Would you have cared if I’d died, Granger?
Yes, she would have. And now, probably more.
Fuck.
Her left arm twinged, and Hermione winced. With all that had happened, she’d been glad to push the night at Malfoy Manor to the back of her head. Now, though, she pulled up the sleeve and it all came rushing back to the front of her head. Hermione traced the irritated M carved into her skin absently as echoes of Bellatrix’s furious screams and jagged nails digging into her arm crawled through her head.
If Dobby had shown up just a minute later, who knew what the witch would’ve done. But then maybe she’d have let go of Hermione, and instead of camping alone with Malfoy, she’d be with Harry and Ron.
Hermione traced her wand over the raised scar, frowning when it didn’t ease the irritation. She whispered a quick diagnostic spell and scanned the blue bubble that hovered over the wound.
Hmm. No dangerous poisons, nor any dark curses – she’d drawn those out with her wand when she’d first apparated away from Bellatrix. Perhaps the remnants of being cut with a cursed blade… some wounds were bound to result in scars.
But as the M glared up at her, she just wished the scar were anything else.
Her eyelids felt heavy as she gazed distantly into the fire. Tomorrow would be long. Despite her earlier confidence, the idea of going into Hogsmeade terrified her. But Malfoy had been right, she thought with a yawn. All things considered, the benefits of not starving to death outweighed the risk, especially under disguise… and as she closed her eyes (for just a few minutes, of course) she couldn’t help the amused twitch of her lips as she imagined Malfoy’s reaction to her admitting he was right.