ch 5. Feuds
September 6th, 1977
12:00 AM
By the time Regulus had finished telling his side of the story, Barty was white as a sheet, and Evan was staring at him with no obvious expression.
“She used her Legilimens to keep me under control the rest of the summer,” he finished quietly.
“Regulus,” Barty said quietly, locking eyes with his best friend.
“It’s fine, it’s over now anyways,” he shrugged, his breathing was off and he felt a bit nauseous after reliving that night in his head. His mother would murder him if she found out he’d told someone what happened.
“It’s late,” Evan said getting up, not making eye contact with Regulus or Barty. “Goodnight.”
He said swiftly and disappeared into the bathroom.
“What’s his problem?” Barty asked.
“He and I come from a society where the whole torture thing isn’t exactly uncommon,” Regulus sighed. “He probably thinks that I shouldn’t have ever cared about my brother, I mean he is a bloodtraitor after all. And when you’re as deep into our world as mine and Evan’s family are, then it's hard to justify keeping a bloodtraitor in your midst, much less care for one.”
“Oh,” he said quietly, spinning a ring around his middle finger. “Do you think I could ever fit into that society?”
“In what way?”
“I don’t know,” he stuttered. “Maybe as like a friend I guess… I don’t really love the future my father has planned for me.”
“I think you want to be more than just a friend,” Regulus smiled slightly, touching his shoulder slightly. Barty looked up, he was scared. “I won’t tell him I promise.”
“Do you think he’d ever y’know? Like me that way?”
“I really don’t know, Ev’s always been a bit of a wild card hasn’t he?”
“Yeah, I suppose…”
“Get some sleep Barty,” Regulus said after a second. Feeling that if he didn’t lie down right then and there he’d pass out.
“Right yeah you must be exhausted,” he said getting up quickly and gathering up his wand. “And Reg,” he added as Regulus was closing the curtains around his bad. “I’m here for you.”
“Thank you,” Regulus smiled weakly back, closing his curtains and falling back onto his pillow.
…
‘you tried to stand up for yourself, even if it just made things worse for both of us at least you tried’
Sirius’ words echoed in the darkness.
Someone was watching him.
‘So it was Narcissa who helped him escape? Pity.’
‘No’ Regulus called back. His heart was pounding in the silence.
‘Why protect her Regulus? Don’t you remember what she did?’
Narcissa holding him back from helping Sirius. The need to scream at her, tell her it was all her fault. She hadn’t warned him. If she’d warned him then everything would be okay.
‘You know better than to fight me Regulus, it never ends well.’
Get. Out.
…
September 7th, 1977
Regulus woke up in a cold sweat, Barty and Evan were busy getting ready for their lessons.
“Shit,” Regulus muttered, throwing off his covers and yanking his shirt off. “Why didn’t you wake me up?”
“We tried, it was like you were in some sort of trance,” Evan shrugged, fixing his silver and green tie around his neck.
“Some real spooky shit,” Barty mumbled through a mouthful of toothpaste.
“Well now I’m going to be late,” he snapped. His head was killing him, and he really needed to talk to Narcissa at breakfast.
“You’ve got Binns first period, just be quiet and he won’t even realize you’re late.”
“Yeah sure,” Regulus was in panic mode now, if that was in fact his mother who’d known it was Narcissa she was in trouble.
“What's wrong Reg,” Barty asked, running a comb through his stringy brown hair.
“Nothing,” he lied. “Just need to talk to Cissy.”
His friends shrugged as Regulus finished up the last few buttons on his shirt and jumped into his trousers as he brushed his teeth, accepting that his hair was going to stay a wild and curly mess today. His friends had already left by the time he came out of the bathroom, he slipped his shoes on then grabbed his bookbag, and threw his tie around his neck, not bothering to do it up yet.
He came up to the Great hall in record time, awkwardly speedwalking to where Narcissa sat with some of her friends.
“Morning Reg,” she smiled.
“Cis I need to talk to you,” he said quickly, giving her a look that made sure she knew how urgent it was.
“Okay uh, I’ll be back Antonin,” she got up and followed Regulus from the hall. “What happened?”
“I don’t know,” he stuttered, pacing across the hall. “I messed up Cis.”
“What did you do Reg?” Cissy became very serious all of a sudden and the two of them sat on the window sill, allowing the chilly autumn morning breeze to wash over them.
He told her about the interaction with his brother the night before, and making the decision to tell Evan and Barty everything that happened, he told her about the dream he’d had last night, and about the mind control over the summer.
“If she knows it was you who let him go,” his voice cracked. “This is my fault.”
“Well,” she hesitated. “I’m honestly just glad she didn’t find out sooner. How did you repress it so much that she didn’t see?”
“It’s easier to pick and choose what she sees when I’m awake, and at home, I just took a sleeping potion every night which gets rid of the issue of thinking of it before I fall asleep. I guess she found a way to get inside my head even at school, I didn’t think I’d need to take it but…”
“It's okay,” she reassured him. “We don’t even know for certain that it was her. Besides, I’ll be married as soon as I return home, and by then it won’t be her or my parent's decision if I should be to blame.”
“And Lucius won’t turn on you?”
She shook her head, “we love one another Reg. I know you claim to have never seen love that wasn’t toxic but it's normal for couples to be in love.”
“I guess,” he chewed the inside of his lip nervously. “Promise to keep me posted?”
“Of course,” she smiled hesitantly. “Now get to class before you’re late, and do up your tie!”
Regulus didn’t bother as he hurried to class, he had history first hour, he slipped in just a minute before the class officially started, and found a seat next to one of the Ravenclaws in his year.
“Hello Regulus,” she smiled politely at him.
“Hi Pandora,” he returned. He’d always liked the girl, she was a bit odd but could read his moods like a book, and knew when he needed a friend to talk to or when to ignore him. “How was your summer?”
“It was very exciting,” she returned, a bright smile spreading across her face. “I’ve almost perfected my new project!”
“That’s wonderful!” he smiled back at her, grateful for the distraction from the worry of his mother and Narcissa.
“Good morning class,” Professor Binns said, his voice as unchanging as ever as he floated up and down the aisleway. “Today we’ll be covering the topic of the Great Goblin Revolution. Take very copious notes as this will be a choice for your midterm essay.”
The hour crawled by, and Regulus found himself drifting off some points in the lecture. His brother was annoyingly good at History, it had been one of the very few things their mother had praised him for over the years. Regulus however was shit at History, always stealing his friend’s notes and copying their essays, Barty always gave in to his pleads but Evan was always more strict, making sure he actually knew what he was talking about somewhat before allowing him to peek at his notes.
When the clock finally struck 9:35 everyone sprang up, suddenly filled with an enthusiasm that hadn’t been present throughout the History Class. Barty had stayed behind to ask Binns about something which left him and Evan awkwardly walking to their next class in silence. The three boys had nearly every class together and without Barty there to ease tensions Regulus and Evan would constantly get into little disputes. Regulus wasn’t about to bring up the night before, his stomach was still churning as he worried about his cousin. But of course, his luck was rotten and Evan opened his mouth.
“About last night…”
“I know you think I’m stupid for caring about him,” Regulus said quickly. “But he’s my brother Ev, it's not so simple that I can just forget about him.”
“I don’t think you’re stupid Regulus,” he sighed. “I simply think you need to think about your family, I know they're probably the worst parents in all of Great Brittian but it's not just them that you’re representing. You’re the next face of the oldest family in the UK! You’ve got responsibilities now that Sirius made his choice, and I just don’t want you to get into a situation where you’ll do something you’ll regret.”
“That doesn’t change the fact that he is my brother ,” Regulus spat back. “How would you feel if your parents threw out your sister and you were suddenly expected to never speak of her again and try your best to forget she ever existed?”
“It would be difficult but I’d have to suck up my pride and do what’s best for my family Regulus,” he glared back. “Not that that’s an issue for me anyways, my parents have my perfect brother to fill those shoes. You should be honored that you get this opportunity.”
“This opportunity?” Regulus scoffed, “This opportunity that was caused by my mother’s cruelty and the departure of my brother? Yeah, what a great chance I’ve got.”
“I’d do anything to be in your position! Even if it meant I would have to forget about Beatrice!”
Regulus spun around to face Evan.
“You’re such a prick! You don’t know shit about my family, or about me for that matter. So if you could so kindly just fuck off and keep your unsolicited and unwanted opinions to yourself.”
Evan looked as though he wanted to slap Regulus but they just stood unmoving, face-to-face for a few very long seconds before Regulus turned on his heel and stormed off down the corridor, away from their next class. He wanted absolutely nothing to do with anyone at the moment.
“Regulus we have class!” Evan called after him.
“I don’t care,” Regulus called back. “I’ll get the notes from Barty later.”
Evan didn’t protest more and marched off in the other direction.
…
Regulus ended up in a secluded tower, practicing his wandless magic by seeing how many things he could get to levitate at once before something gave way. He’d gotten a total of twenty-seven objects so far before a gust of wind blew in and everything had fallen. The tower was quite strictly off-limits, there was no railing and people had almost fallen a few times. That’s what made it such a perfect spot, even Filch didn’t remember it most of the time and the only other time people were up there was at night to hook up.
Regulus was almost at twenty-three when a sickly familiar voice broke his concentration.
“Regulus?” Regulus winced, and all of his objects came tumbling down, his wand bounced off his knee and much to his amusement his Advanced Potions book fell on top of James Potter’s head.
“Oops,” he smirked, as the older boy cried out slightly.
“How were you doing that?” He asked angrily. “You didn’t have your wand it was floating around too.
“Wandless magic,” Regulus shrugged, reciting the incantation to send his possessions flying into his book bag. “Staple learning in mother’s mind. Sirius knows how to do it too, he was always quite good.” James was staring at him with wide eyes, Regulus rolled his eyes and strut over to him. “Why aren't you in class anyways?”
“I,” James rubbed his head gently where the book had hit. “McGonagall told me to and patrol for a bit, some first-year Hufflepuff was found this morning under the confoundus charm. Just wanted me to make sure everything was alright up here.”
“Well I’m fine,” he replied, trying to slip around James. “You can go now.”
“Et et not so fast young man,” James grabbed his arm firmly yet very gently. It didn’t cause him to flinch away whatsoever, unlike most others’ touches did. He assumed he’d mastered that because of Sirius. “Why are you not in class?”
“Didn’t feel like going today,” he shrugged. “Evan and I got into a tiff and I’ve got nearly every class with him.”
“Oh,” James replied blandly, he was still holding his head.
“That still hurt?” Regulus cocked his head. James nodded slightly. “Let me see.” Regulus pulled out his wand and whispered the illumination charm. He held it up to James’ eyes and watched how his pupils reacted to the light, one was a tad smaller than the other and Regulus cursed under his breath. “You’ve got a minor concussion. Book must’ve hit you pretty hard.”
“Yeah must’ve,” James agreed quickly. “Suppose I should go and see Poppy?”
“No need,” regulus picked up his bag and slung it over his shoulder. “I can give you something for it. It’ll be less fuss and it honestly works a lot quicker than what Poppy doles out.”
“How the hell do you have something better than the mediwitch?” James asked skeptically, following Regulus as he descended the spiral stairs.
“My mothers a piece of work,” he laughed. James however didn’t find it quite as amusing.
“You don’t have to laugh about it y’know.”
“Laughing about it helps,” Regulus said. “Besides Sirius jokes about it all the time.”
“Not so much since he left,” James added solemnly. “She was-”
“I know what she did James,” Regulus cut him off. “I had to watch everything.”
“Oh,” James turned a bring shade of pink as the turned the corner. “I’m sorry Sirius had told me that I should’ve thought.”
“It's fine, just… let's not talk about that, makes me sick.”
“Right yes,” he nodded. “What do you wanna talk about?”
“Nothing really.”
“Alrighty then…”
They walked the rest of the way to the Slytherin common room in silence, “Dulcis Dolor.”
“The fuck does that mean?” James asked as they walked inside, regulus peeking around to make sure everyone was in their classes. He most definitely wouldn’t become any more popular for bringing James Potter into the Slytherin Common Room.
“Oh nothing, if you really want to know ask Sirius,” he replied awkwardly. It was very common for their password to be dark, but this term it felt like it was directed at Regulus’ summer.
“Alright.”
“Keep up and stop gawking,” Regulus snipped. “I would prefer if no one knew you were down here. And Evan and Barty are in class so my dorm will be safe.”
James scurried after him, becoming more and more obviously injured, this perplexed Regulus, as the book hadn’t fallen from very high and he’d seen the boy get into much worse scrapes and come out without a scratch. Regulus pushed open the door to his dorm and pushed James inside, closing it firmly before throwing his bag onto his bed.
“Sit down,” he instructed. “Let me get my things.”
“This is your dorm?” he marveled. “It's so dark!”
“Of course it is,” regulus mumbled, rummaging through the box of medical supplies he kept for emergencies. “We’re under the fucking lake.”
“Right yeah, I forget that sometimes,” he’d gotten quiet as Regulus finally found the bottle of pale yellow liquid.
“Take this,” he said, pouring the right dosage into a small glass. “Try not to dwell on the taste either it's unpleasant.”
“Alrighty,” James took the glass, giving it a little sniff before downing it in one go. His nose wrinkled and he gagged. “Bloody hell, what is that?”
“Usual potion for concussions and a mix of PepperUp potions with just straight-up coffee.”
“Why coffee?” James laughed.
“Sirius thought it would make it taste better,” he smiled. They’d been so naive when they'd accidentally created the concoction the first time.
James was pretty when he laughed, his eyes were closed and he had the widest grin on his face. Regulus was horrified when he realized he’d been staring, he quickly brushed the feeling and began putting his things back.
“Thank you, Reg,” James said after he’d stopped laughing. “You didn’t have to help.”
“It’s no big deal.”
“Regulus?”
“Yeah?”
“Are we friends?”
“I guess,” Regulus said hesitantly. “I mean so long as being your friend doesn’t entail hanging out with my brother constantly.”
“No of course not! I understand you guys need time.”
“Good, thanks,” Regulus smiled politely. He had shivers up his arms and neck, the kind he hadn’t felt since his second year when he’d had the fattest crush on Evan’s little sister Beatrice.
“Well since we're friends,” James said after a minute, coming over and sitting on the floor next to Regulus and his trunk. “I feel like I should probably tell you it wasn’t you that gave me the concussion…”
“What do you mean?” Regulus asked, setting the box in the back of his trunk and closing it.
“Someone cursed me, I fell back and hit my head. It was before I went up and found you.”
“Well, who was it? You told them off and punished them didn’t you?”
James looked down for a moment before meeting Regulus’ eyes. “Regulus you can’t be angry at him.”
“Who the hell was it?” Regulus demanded though a piece of him didn’t want to hear his name slip off of James’ lips.