sirius’ eyes cautiously twitch to the others as his body falls behind the rhythm of the music. they widen slightly as they suddenly meet mary‘s dark brown ones which mirror a gentle confusion, the quirk of her eyebrow only there for a split of a second before her face turns away from him in a twirl, her black locks flopping around with the move.
as quick as her face & questioning eyes disappeared, they confront him again as the twirl goes into another step, facing him. midways she stops, the concentration falling of her body & mimic.
dorcas, in the middle of continuing the for her familiar routine, shrieks surprised as her body bumps into mary‘s unmoving one which originally shouldn‘t be standing in her way but lower itself to the ground just a few steps further left.
sirius feels a weird tug in his chest as he sees the others slowing down in their moves as well now out of the corner of his eyes. his pulse quickens, annoyingly so as his eyes nervously flicker between the girls.
dorcus rubs her arm where it crashed into mary’s shoulder. pandora & marlene sit up and brush through their blond hair, panting slightly.
someone stands up and walks over to the recorder, lowering the volume of the blasting music and eventually pressing the stop button.
“what’s going on?“
lily walks backs.
sirius chews on the inside of his cheeks, an erratic hand brushing a strand of black curls back as a big sigh leaves his chest.
his eyes flicker to mary again & unsurprisingly she watches him already intently.
„want us to go over that move again? we could show you the steps in this part slowly one more time maybe“ mary directs gently at him.
he can feel all their eyes moving to him now.
„why, did you fuck up again?“ marlene‘s face shows a shit eating grin, shoving sirius‘ side.
sirius huffs quietly, shoving his best friend back as his hand comes up to his hair again. frustrated he tugs at a few curls.
„i just..man it feels weird to…“ he tries, lowering his hand to brush over his chest in an attempt to get the weird tugging in there to stop.
„this move..it‘s so 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘶𝘢𝘭“
„normally you don‘t have a problem with being sensual?“ pandora asks in her quiet voice with a soft, questioning tilt of her head. a few bleached braids fall to the other side, the attached crystals clinking a little.
„no, yeah, i know!“ sirius mumbles. being sensual, especially when dancing is his most favorite thing. when he‘s captivated by the music and rhythm & everything just blurs to moves, his body & adrenaline.
„today, it‘s just..i dunno“ he concludes a little helpless.
he has no clue why his body protests this fiercely against rolling his hips to the ground & throwing his ass back when that is what he does so often anyway. being sensual isn‘t a problem at all usually. provocative moves are his go to whenever he dances.
not today however it seems.
his body doesnt feel free & light as it usually does. it feels weirdly heavy and constricted. the tight, cropped top doesnt really help as it feels too revealing. too provocative, too weird if not even too..𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨
his shoulders are too pointy, his waist too thin and his wrists too small. his fingers too elegant & slender, his nails too colorful.
hair too long, earrings too, face too soft and god..the 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴𝘩𝘢𝘥𝘰𝘸 is wrong too. too heavy & present on his eyelids.
the same with his lips. they‘re too red. too glossy & sticky. too 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩.
𝘩𝘦 is too much.
„sirius? hey. love, 𝘩𝘦𝘺“ lily‘s voice rings in his ears. his breath gets caught in his throat, pulse going too fast. ‚𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩.‘
everything‘s too much.
sirius hands reach up to his throat, too slender fingers hooking into the too tight collar of his too short, too revealing top. he can‘t breathe.
„𝘴𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘶𝘴!!“
he gasps, eyes widening as they zero in onto a familiar red freckles sprinkled, soft glowing face. forest green eyes framed by light lashes look sternly into his own.
„breathe with me, sirius.“
suddenly he feels a hand pressing down onto his chest. not too much pressure, not too little. it feels good. it 𝘪𝘴 good.
„focus on my hand, sirius. move it with your breathing“ lily guides him firmly but gently. her fingertips dig into his shirt as he tries his first shaky breath in, guiding his chest down as he breathes out again.
„you‘re doing good, love! keep breathing.“
it gets easier, less shaky and croaky the more he focuses on the way lily‘s hand heaves & sinks together with his chest. heaves & sinks, heaves & sinks. like a slow, repetitive but constant rhythm. his strained fingers slowly loosen up the tight grip on the top‘s collar, hand sliding down on his body until it falls slack to his side.
his senses get clearer & sharper again with time and he can feel the close presence of the others around lily and him. he hears one person walking away behind him and returning not too long after.
„water, dear?“ pandora‘s soft voice echoes through the almost fully silent gym aside from his own panting.
not trusting his voice, a short nod is his answer. his trembling hand reaches up to the cool bottle she‘s holding and guides the opening clumsily to his painted lips.
the water feels healing down his dry throat, his mind clears up a little too the more he gulps down.
„you‘re doing good“ lily is there to remind him again, her hand now gently rubbing soothing circles on his chest.
„want to sit down?“ she asks carefully after he lets up of the bottle again. her head gestures to the side, sirius’ eyes follow and find the bench at the gym’s wall where the recorder as well as all their bags & belongings are.
he nods again, still not thinking his voice would carry out a normal sound between his lips.
as if everyone waited for his go, the others head up to the bench as well. lily and he follow a little slower. dorcas and mary sit down on the bench while marlene and pandora sink down on the ground in front, reaching for their own water bottles.
lily supports his shoulders gently as he settles down as well, the bench not the ground. he takes another sip now, eyes watching the wide ceiling concentratedly. there are still a few gazes fixed on him. he can feel where they meet with his body, spots tingling weirdly.
“sorry about that” sirius eventually mumbles, closing the lid and putting down the bottle.
“im not hearing any of this” marlene huffs up to him from where she sits with her body leaning on one bend up leg. “if you’re gonna start apologizing for a panic attack i will officially never let you see remus ever again. you’re picking up too many traits of him.”
she stares right into his eyes, her own with smudged, dirty black eyeliner surrounded look determined and fierce.
“i’ll refrain from doing so then. i know how you look when you’re not lying” sirius huffs with a quiet, croaky laugh. “it’s 𝘴𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘺.”
marlene grins. “you’re pathetic, black” she rolls her eyes. “one stern look and you give in. he really has it easy with you.”
another laugh leaves sirius chest, already sounding much more like the usual barking similar sound. “i hate you, marls” he sighs, throwing her the finger before he turns to the others.
“no but seriously um…” he starts quietly again. “i don’t know why this happened. today is just..weird.”
his eyes search for especially mary’s. being the leading role in their dancing project for the upcoming campus party, she’s the person he feels the need to apologize to the most.
today he mucked up multiple times already and not just when it came to this one move. but especially with this one it had been too tricky all day. his body just wouldn’t do it.
“oh, i fully agree with marlene. don’t apologize for this, love.” mary shakes her head firmly, an understanding smile on her lips. “we all have bad and weird days. if today is yours, im sure you’ll perform just lovely next time.”
sirius isn’t fully sure about that if he’s totally honest, but he doesn’t dare to disagree with her. “and after all, we can still go over those moves again. so no pressure, sirius, honestly!” mary goes on and stops him from losing himself in his thoughts again. he smiles slightly at her.
“did..anything happen?” lily asks suddenly softly. “you seemed..kind out of it already when you arrived.” she looks at him with genuine eyes, the deep green sparkling welcoming in the yellow lights on the ceiling.
sirius’ breath hitches and his eyes flicker to lily. he clears his throat. “what?”
“yeah, you did” pandora chimes in from the ground. “you seemed hasty & not really there. all worked up somehow and if my eyes didn’t betray me you even looked close to crying. you left for the toilet after you arrived & came back a bit more put together but your eyes were red”
there it was again. this almost indifferent, obvious sounding honesty that pandora seemed to have always excelled in from the point on sirius had got to know her.
slipping in too much details than necessary at times, not really being sensible & speaking her thoughts without filter. much like him to be honest. a trait he usually loves about her, just..not necessarily when it’s directed at him.
“im-“ he begins slightly defensive, searching fir words “i didnt..”
“oh, but i saw it too”
sirius’ gaze snaps to dorcas. “lily & dora are right. you were completely out of it. i thought you went to go and throw up in the toilet.”
“i didnt 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘸 𝘶𝘱” sirius scoffs offended.
“you did look a bit green to be honest” marlene now shrugs, playing with her shoelaces.
“i didn’t throw up though!!” sirius groans out a bit loudly, “i’m 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘦! nothing happened, today is just..fucking weird.”
lily’s hands settle down on his shoulders, forcing them to ease up the sudden tension that started to build there. „nothing of this is is a presumption, sirius. today can totally be just weird. that‘s valid enough of an answer“ she reminds him quietly. „what we meant was in case there’s anything weighing on you, you can talk to us. i know you said you don‘t know whatever this caused and there doesn‘t have to be a huge reason. panic attacks can just happen. but in case there is anything, a possible reason, you might wanna talk about it, hm?“
sirius swallows, his eyes fluttering dangerously close at lily‘s gentleness. there it is. this weird tugging in his chest & that weird, heavy and deep sitting lump in his throat. but now there‘s also this passionately disliked tearing of guilt which could call his body & soul an overused home to stay in by now.
„i..know..that“ he mumbles quietly around the lump, „im sorry, i didn‘t mean to get loud.“ his hands reach up to his head, pressing & massaging his temples. „it‘s just…“ his voice leaves him. an annoyed huff leaves sirius‘ chest.
he straightens up, leaves his temples be and takes a deep breath. „everything feels wrong today. 𝘪 feel wrong today. too much. all..all of this“ he gestures to himself.
„wrong?“ mary asks with a tilt of her head.
„yes, 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨 . this..i..i‘m not 𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵. nothing of this is“ he gestures to himself one more time. „i shouldnt..be like this. this is wrong!“
„if you mean the fabulous makeup i did earlier in class for you i will kill you myself“ marlene has an eyebrow raised. „nothing about my skills is bad nor wrong.“
without him wanting to, a tired, little smile tugs at the corners of sirius‘ mouth. „then im afraid you‘ll have to murder me“ he mumbles with a shrug. „i hate it.“
marlene‘s eyebrow raises up even higher. „nice of you“ she huffs. “but why? you usually love it?“
„it has nothing to do with your skills marls i promise. it‘s just..i shouldnt. yes, i..i love it. but i shouldnt. just as much as i shouldnt…do all of this either“ sirius‘ tugs at his hair, points at his earrings and his outfit.
„it‘s..wrong.“
„why?“
„𝘸𝘩𝘺??“ sirius looks at pandora in disbelief. ‚men dont do that. im a man‘ he thinks fiercely „im a ma-……im..i- men don‘t do that. they shouldnt. it‘s weird! it‘s fucking wrong!“ he bites out, glaring at her. his breaths go shaky again, hands trembling in his lap. his eyes water. horrified by that realization he tears them away from pandora and hastily rubs the back of one hand over them.
„𝘪-𝘪𝘮 wrong. im gross, it‘s 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘨𝘶𝘴𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨“ he hears himself whisper, voice trembling awkwardly.
„sirius..“ lily whispers, the genuine shock clearly audible in her voice. he knows, if he‘d be brave enough to face her he would see big, confused green eyes looking at him worriedly & pityingly.
„i just..i shouldnt lily. i really shouldnt“ he whispers.
„oh, but sirius..you 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥“ she whispers back, voice trembling just as much as his own.
his head snaps up, ready to disagree because..he shouldnt. his entire body screams he shouldnt. the screams..they told him not to.
„lily, no, you..“
„no, sirius, you shush. fuck, if you 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴, you 𝘴𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥“
„she‘s right, you know?“ pandora clinks in again, tone completely composed and calm. „if this, the makeup, the long hair, the top, the jewelry, is what you want, who you are then why shouldnt you. it‘s not weird nor wrong.“
„right, who told you that bullshit anyway??“ marlene asks.
sirius looks down at pandora and her with a puzzled look. „i-…no it‘s..it‘s not..you don‘t understand it 𝘪𝘴 wrong! im-..“
„sirius, did someone harass you?”
his head snaps back to dorcas. “w-what?”
“did someone harass you? today? for how you look?” dorcas repeats.
sirius’ heart beats in his chest.
the screams.. the angry face.. the words.. the hand..
“sirius?” lily asks carefully.
“i-im..” his voice gives in again. the lump in his throat swell to a size he cant talk around anymore. he tears up. the hand..
“oh, 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦” lily whispers. she wraps her arms around his trembling body, pressing hers against his, embracing him with so much care & gentleness that sirius’ can’t hold back the tears anymore. she reminds him of euphemia potter in this moment and he cries a little harder.
he oddly enough cries a whole lot. right into lily‘s shoulder, right this moment and completely messes up marlene‘s makeup & lily‘s shirt.
however afterwards he feels like his body somehow is able to unfold from the weird constricting feeling that has been caging him since before the practice started. there‘s some of the lightness back too, especially in his chest.
„wanna talk about it?“ mary asks softly as she reaches for some tissues in her bag & gives one to him. sirius nods meekly after shortly considering. if crying felt this relieving already, maybe talking about it will feel even better.
and so he does.
he tells them how he was excited for the practice, dancing and skipping while listening to music with his beloved headphones. how he accidentally ran into an old man and his wife. how he apologized but got cut off by the man shouting at him. the things he called him after looking him up and down rudely. what disgusting things he said about his body. how furious he looked, what genuine hot burning disgust & anger pulsated in this man‘s eyes, how he lifted his hand & aggressively tugged on his hair, how he then started running in panic.
„i just started to feel wrong. everything. all this. i felt too..feminine. he told me i shouldnt be this. i should ‘grow the fuck up’ and be ‘a real man’ not such a disgrace. it made me feel..uncomfortable in myself. everything was too much. i was too much” sirius mumbles with a huff. “that’s why today nothing worked. especially…especially that one move. i felt disgusting even thinking about doing it. gross how sensual & ‘women like’ i would have to move my body for it. too sexual, too wrong for..for a..man. i just heard that man’s voice and the things he screamed at me the entire time”
“this is so fucked up” marlene hisses. her eyes flash with pure rage as sirius looks at her. a bitter, hallow laugh leaves his throat. "𝘪𝘮 fucked up marls. i thought we all were”
“im serious”
“wrong, i am”
“fuck off” she rolls her eyes with a scoff. “i mean it. nothing of what happened to you is okay or should in any fucking way make you believe you’re wrong. the only thing that is wrong is that fucking bastard! seriously how fucking dare he even??”
“𝘴𝘪𝘳𝘪𝘶𝘴𝘭𝘺” sirius giggles.
“im glad you’re seemingly feeling better but i’ll smack you if you bring that overused joke one more time” marlene throws him the finger, sirius sticks his tongue out.
“marls is right, sirius” mary smiles sympathetically. “im sorry that this happened to you. it shouldnt have. we should be living in a world where nothing of this nor this should be a problem” she gestures to him, then to herself. “but those homophobic and racist and honestly just generally speaking problematic motherfuckers sadly still exist. however that doesnt mean we should pay them any mind or give their words more meaning that they have. because they dont have any meaning in the first place. they shouldnt. what those fuckers say is simply 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨 , nothing you do or how you look, the way you present yourself, as a gay man who likes to wear makeup or as whoever, whatever you want to be, nothing of this is wrong. 𝘺𝘰𝘶 aren’t. nothing about you”
“mary macdonald, you’re so very lovely” sirius whispers, “god did i ever tell you how much i love & appreciate you?” he wipes a last tear that sneaked it’s way out of the corner of his eye from his cheek.
“oh, sirius black, dont get all sappy on me now” mary laughs out lightly but gestures him to come for a hug. gladly he obliges, draping himself across lily’s lap to wrap his arms around mary. lily rubs gently over his back.
“i dearly love you” sirius hushes into her ear before placing a big kiss on her warm skin. “yeah yeah me too” she grins, patting his head.
“hello im jelaous and feel left out” sirius can feel someone poking his shin. he giggles softly. “cmon marls, what about a very sappy group hug?” he suggests as he leans out of the hug and flicks marlenes chin.
“just wanted to say” lily smiles, “i totally feel left out too”
“group hug it is then” mary laughs lovingly at her girlfriend.
“yall gonna join too?” sirius turns to dorcas and pandora.
“if i must..” dorcas rolls her eyes but grins.
“i insist actually” marlene wiggles her eyebrows, blowing a dramatic kiss to her girlfriend which earns her another thrown finger.
“i love group hugs” pandora smiles.
“knew it! come here, come here” sirius gestures wildly.
all girls cuddle up closer to sirius, arms wrapping around him everywhere and pressing him close. soft giggles & grins get exchanged while they try to coordinate all their limbs and find an at least bearable position.
“you’re not wrong sirius. you’re 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘶𝘭” lily whispers as they have settled a bit.
sirius inhales deeply. he closes his eyes and relaxes fully into everyone’s closeness. this feel recharging. oddly empowering in a way.
the closeness, the togetherness & understanding of this entire conversation between all six of them.
sirius definitely feels loved & accepted in this moment. understood & weirdly 𝘴𝘦𝘦𝘯…
maybe what all those lovely women said is true. maybe he isn’t wrong. maybe embracing this side of him is.. beautiful. maybe embracing it is strong and something to be proud of. maybe it isnt gross & disgusting. ‘unnatural’
if it’s what he feels so deep down, with all his being, how could it be unnatural right? if it’s just 𝘩𝘪𝘮.
“my loves…i actually feel the urge to dance right now. like it’s an urgent urge” sirius eventually says into the quiet and starts to untangle himself from the mess of limbs and hair. “no choreo, no steps just..dance” he smiles brightly.
five faces smile back just as brightly, excitement filled eyes staring at him.
“no choreo, no steps, just dance” mary nods wildly.
“dance however we want! weird, stupid, feminine, sensual! provocative!” sirius exclaims with a loud cheer, throwing up a fist.
“yes!!” lily giggles excitedly.
“fuck heteronormativity!!!” marlene screeches loudly, throwing up both fingers.
“fuck heteronormativity!!” five voices echo after her with loud giggles and laughs.
sirius grins widely and skips over to the recorder, unplugging mary’s phone and replacing it with his own. suddenly loud music blasts through the gym again, immediate screams & cheers following as soon as the others realize what song it is.
<<𝘪 𝘳𝘶𝘯 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘪𝘢𝘳𝘴, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘶𝘦𝘭 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦. >>
<< 𝘪 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘪 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘺𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧. 𝘪 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘪 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘴𝘢𝘥 𝘥𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘢𝘥 𝘯𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴 >>
aurora’s voice fills the gym and the air with wavering, pulsating, smoky tones. goosebumps forms on sirius’ skin, rhythm and melody seemingly creeping inside his body in an instant.
he quickly runs into the middle of the huge hall, going in pose and closing his eyes. his entire body excitedly awaits the beat drop, nostrils flaring slightly and eyelids twitching. his heart thumps in his chest and suddenly has an idea. hand coming down right above his heart, imitating the beat of it and letting it fade into the rhythm of the song.
letting his body and the music become 𝘰𝘯𝘦.
<< 𝘴𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘵𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘮𝘺 𝘢𝘳𝘮𝘴, 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘮𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴 >>
<<𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪 𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘦𝘥 𝘢 𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦 >>
the beat drops and he begins to dance. eyes still closed and head empty. thrill fills his body to the brim. there’s nothing left of the earlier constriction, no weight.
just faintly he hears the screams of the others cheering him on, however a big smile tugs up the corners of his mouth. happiness settling into his features the more the drowns in the music and his moves.
suddenly sirius opens the eyes, in the middle of a twirl. he only sees blurring colors and shadows. five shadow around him moving just as much as he does.
but there is one more shadowy figure. not as close around him as the other five.
with the music together his body moves slower, twirl smoothing into a slow motion like whirl of his arms. his curls flap around his head, eyes widening as he gets a clearer glimpse of the figure standing on the other side of the gym next to the door.
<<𝘪 𝘥𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘪𝘴𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘩𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴, 𝘢𝘣𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘯𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦
>>
<< 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘭𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘵𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘰 𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘴, 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘴 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘵𝘰 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘺 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘰𝘥𝘴>>
<𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘨𝘰𝘵 𝘯𝘦𝘳𝘷𝘦𝘴 >
that man really got nerves.
sirius’ heart jumps wildly in his chest as the beat drops again for the refrain, body automatically moving faster again now.
𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘶𝘴.
sirius gets another glimpse on him, the shadow of his figure getting blurred again. but it doesnt matter. the split of a second he got to look at him just minutes earlier enough to let his heart beat out of his chest. a crushing wave of love & thankfulness washes over sirius.
remus standing there with his bag & short fluffy honey curls. in his sweater vest and knitted scarf and gloves.
remus watches him with so much admiration and love in his eyes. watches him dance. all powerful, provocative and sensual. he watches him being himself, in all his glory and it‘s the most beautiful thing in the world he‘s ever seen.
sirirus 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘴, because he 𝘴𝘢𝘸.
saw in remus‘ eyes. a reflection of what sirius sees whenever he looks at remus and his lovely, beautiful scars.
this is it. this is what it‘s worth.
the hurt, the frustration, the confusion.
all worth it. this is is what he‘s doing all this for. being himself. being loved for being himself.
remus‘ smile. 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘶𝘴.
remus, remus, remus, remus, remus, remus
his 𝘮𝘰𝘰𝘯𝘺.
sirius opens his eyes again during another twirl, catching remus‘ gaze and 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘨 at him. baffling, enticing him even more. 𝘤𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘪𝘮
a loud, genuine laugh breaks out of sirius‘ as he throws his head back, feeling his long curls swooshing on his nape and shoulders. he looks at the ceiling, cheeks almost hurting from all his lovesick grinning.
oh. 𝘰𝘩 this really is it. he‘s a star. the 𝘣𝘳𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘦𝘴𝘵.