“Your Mother was there for me at a time when no one else was. Not only was she a singularly gifted witch, she was also uncommonly kind. She had a way of seeing the beauty in others. Even, and perhaps, most especially, when that person could not see it in themselves.”
The rain was pounding down in Hogwarts, and for as cold as it felt, Remus felt like each drop burned.
How could he be so stupid?
It was a matter of time, honestly, before this happened.
He was sitting in the mud, rain pouring on him as he sat soaked in his clothing, the cold slosh melting into his bones as he sobbed, his chest pounding in pain so visceral it thrummed along with the breaks and splits littering his lithe frame.
How could he be so naive?!?
His mother had warned him about this, and so had his father. They were so worried about him making friends, especially with Black, and even Potter.
The rich would take any chance they could to bring down the poor.
He bent forward, a horrid cry ripping out of his throat, sounding almost as animalistic as the howls of pain and frenzied energy that rip out of his chest every full moon.
He’s ruined.
Severus would surely tell everyone now. And even if he doesn’t now, he will eventually, his whole life is ruined.
Who’s to say he wasn’t in on it from the beginning?
Who’s to say that Black and Potter and even Pettigrew hadn’t been planning this all along? He was top of their class, a prefect, he’s held the title of top student all six years of his life here.
Of course, they’d want to bring him down.
How. could. He. be. So. stupid.
He laid down in the muddy grass, sobs still racking his skinny frame as he willed himself to be buried alive, wishing he’d never survived the attack back when he was four years old.
Why couldn’t he have died then? Why. why couldn’t he have been put out of this miserable existence before it started?
His sense was still heightened, something that stuck with him at all times, so he could smell it when someone joined him on the grounds.
Someone was watching him fall apart, they were watching as every pent-up emotion spilled out of his skin and splits, blood and tears mingling in the earth.
He couldn’t bring himself to care.
He felt the person get closer, and every nerve in him was screaming to move, to run. He’d been discovered. He was in grave danger. Severus must have already told, then.
The person stopped at his side, her knees hitting the ground at his side as lavender and peach hit his senses.
Lily,
His dearest friend,
His first friend.
They’d met on the train, both being shunned for being half-blood and muggle-born.
They bonded over their love of chocolate and literature.
She shuddered a sigh as she slowly laid down beside him, on her side so they were face to face, her gorgeous green eyes sparkling with unshed tears and fury, her vibrant red hair standing out in the grey atmosphere.
She was livid, he could feel it,
He was in agony, she could see it.
His amber eyes were dulled with a horrid pain of betrayal.
She has never looked calmer and more furious in all her life.
She didn’t say a word, she simply reached out and brushed his long fringed curly bang out of his eyes, blood from the long diagonal scratch on his face washing onto her porcelain skin but she showed no care.
“You don’t deserve this, Rem. I’m so sorry.”
She whispered, her voice thick as the tears spilled, her rosy cheeks catching them.
He was shaking, he honestly can’t tell if it was from exhaustion or the fact that he’s been laying in the rain for three hours in the middle of October, but he can’t stop shaking and it was sending him over the edge.
She tsked softly, moving closer to press a kiss to his bloody forehead, her warm lips shocking a gasp out of him.
He hadn’t realized he’d stopped crying until now.
“I’ll fix this Rem. don’t worry. I’ll fix it all,”
She can’t.
He adores her, body and soul, he knows he’d kill and die for her if it ever came to it, but there’s not a single thing she can do to fix this.
So he stays silent and begs the universe that she can.
Even if it’s just temporary, he begs every wizarding god out there that she can.
“There, there, my greatest friend. You will be alright, I promise love.”
She whispered again, and he realized he was crying again,
His hand snatched out and grasped the wrist connected to the hand that was on his cheek.
“I know Remus, it’s alright. You don’t have to say anything. I already know. I love you too.”
There’s nothing quite like his love for Lily.
When James first started to fall for her, he was insanely jealous of Remus’s relationship with Lily.
Most of Hogwarts thought they were an item,
Severus also hated him for it.
But that simply wasn’t the case.
Lily was his sister, in everything but blood.
She was his platonic soulmate, something bonding them together in a way that was so close he could feel her. Deep in his soul.
He loved Lily in a way no other would ever be able to comprehend.
“Now listen to me Remus, and listen to me good. You are ill, I can already feel it in your skin, if you stay out here any longer you could catch death- and don’t you dare think how that’s what you want. It’s not what I want. So here’s what we’re going to do. I’m taking you back to the hospital wing, -Madame Pomfrey is beside herself at your disappearance by the way you great fool,- and we are going to get you changed and cleaned up. And then, once you’re settled in bed and warmed and wrapped, we’ll have hot chocolate and sit side by side until you fall asleep.”
He wanted to do that very much, a twang of guilt pooled in his stomach at the knowledge that he’d worried Poppy, but he hadn’t been thinking when he fled the scene of the Whomping Willow.
But there was one problem,
“I can’t-”
He whispered, his voice thick with tears and his Welsh accent slipping back in,
“Why, my friend?”
He flicked a hand to his legs, one bent in a horrible shape.
He’d run out of necessity, trying to get as far from Hogwarts castle and the Whomping Willow as he could, but the second he was away enough he crashed and hasn’t been able to move since.
“Ah. yes, I see that. We’ll Apparate then, come now, up on your bum,”
She shifted to sit, helping him into a sitting position as he yelped in pain, every cut and break making itself present,
His clothes were torn and hanging loose on his frame as she tsked, kissing his cheek again, blood smearing on her face,
“I’m sorry, my sweet, this is going to hurt I’m afraid, so hold your breath,”
He did as he was told as she apparated them into the hospital wing. The second they hit the ground he screamed out in pain, grasping her arms in blind fear as she shushed him gently,
“All done pumpkin, we’re here now-”
“Remus! My boy, you mustn't run off like that! Merlin, I was petrified!”
Pomfrey screamed, rushing the teens as she scooped Remus up into her arms,
He was taller than her by a whole whopping foot and yet still arms and legs and easy for her to shift and maneuver, years of practicing the art of caring for the boy.
She shushed him gently, shaking her head with a frown,
“You’re burning up love, I need to get you changed and your cuts and breaks tended to.”
She turned to Lily with a nod, gratefulness spilling over her every aspect,
“Thank you, Miss Evans, you will be awarded points for your selfless act. I will make sure of it. Now you run along and shower and change, I will get Remus here all fixed up-”
“Can I come back after? Please Madame, I- he- I can’t leave him alone. Not after what’s happened.”
She rushed, her emotions rolling like a torrent,
Pomfrey smiled warmly nodding,
“Absolutely, my dear, now run along. I’ll send word to Professor McGonagall on your absence,”
Lily nodded, pressing her palm to Remus’ cheek as she smiled softly at him, tilting her head to the side,
“I’ll be back in a jiff with hot chocolate and a good book for us, alright love?”
He smiled, soft and tiny but she felt her heart explode with hope.
She’d missed that smile,
“There’s the smile I love. I’ll be back, in a few.”
He hummed, his voice torn still as she patted his cheek once more before tearing out of the hospital wing.
She will end his so-called friend soon enough. But for now, she has a promise to keep.
“I sure hope you are still interested in the Chronicles of Narnia.”
Remus looked up from the notes he was reading over on the day’s class, his face mostly covered with a bandage, leaving one amber eye to peek out of the white bandaging.
His face would be a permanent reminder of the night. Along with the lining on his hips and torso and his arms.
He’d torn into himself in an effort to keep away from hurting Severus.
He’d also broken a wrist and his leg, both were set and healing.
A tiny grin peeked out on his lips as she waved the handed him a large mug of hot chocolate, putting her’s on the bedside table before she scrambled up on the bed beside him, putting her satchel on her lap as she brandished the muggle books and laid them out on both of their laps, before picking up the first book, enchanting it out in front of them as she picked up her mug from the bedside table and snuggled into his side.
He flicked his good wrist and the blanket covered her legs as well, all the book moving to his side before he motioned with a finger and they spread back out on their laps evenly,
She giggled, mumbling that he was a show off as she flipped the first page open, resting her head on his shoulder, she cleared her throat,
“The scar is not going to change a single thing about you, Remus. Please know that now.”
She stated, shocking him slightly,
She could truly read his mind,
He was still feeling unable to talk, something having almost bewitched his tongue, keeping him from being able to express anything besides a soft hum as he bumped her head with his cheek, a searing pain blazing across his face at the movement.
She accepted his answer with a tiny nod, a small smile breaking out on her lips as she sighed contently,
“This is a story about something that happened long ago when your grandfather was a child. It is a very important story because it shows how all the comings and goings between our own world and the land of Narnia first began-”