where fate brought us together

There were a hundred and forty-fucking-two staircases at Hogwarts: wide, sweeping ones; narrow, rickety ones; some that led somewhere different on a Friday; some with a vanishing step halfway up that you had to remember to jump. Remus had never ever had to climb so many steps in his life, and by the end of the week he was starting to regret coming to Hogwarts purely based on the number of stairs.

It was bloody exhausting.

And to add to it there were about a trillion doors. And of course a magical school just absolutely had to have magical doors too. Some wouldn’t open unless you asked politely, or tickled them in exactly the right place, and there were doors that weren’t really doors at all, but solid walls just pretending. Remus tried his best to avoid all these magical doors and stairs but he found it difficult since it was also very hard to remember where anything was, because it all seemed to move around a lot. It was all very irritating for Remus and he found himself wondering why wizards had to be so complicated. Staircases didn’t have to move for God’s sake!

Not including the day of arrival Remus had been at Hogwarts for three whole days, two of those days included his very first lessons and he had been pleasantly surprised to find out that his lack of interaction with the magical world didn’t seem to set him back much at all. Although he wasn’t going to lie, the majority of his lessons had been introductory so it was all pretty simple stuff, he was sure he’d fall behind as soon as they got onto real content. 

Herbology was all about magical plants, stuff like herbs and fungi, what they were useful for stuff like that. Remus didn’t find it particularly interesting.

Professor Binns taught History of Magic, and Remus thought that he was the most boring man he had ever met in his life and he wasn’t quite sure if that was because he was a ghost or just that that was his personality.

Transfiguration had been with Professor McGonagall who had made a spectacular entrance via the embarrassment of James Potter. 

“You think that’s McGonagall’s pet?” Sirius asked as the four of them entered the transfiguration classroom, Remus made sure he was slightly separated from the trio, the only reason he had been following them in the first place was so that he wouldn’t get lost.

Blind following the blind really.

“Must be” James shrugged, walking towards the tabby cat sat on the teachers desk upfront. Meanwhile Remus went to sit down at a desk, Sirius and Peter following to do the same.

“You don’t think he’s going to stroke it?” Peter whispered "It might have rabies"

Remus just shrugged. He wasn’t involved. Instead, Sirius answered

“Of course he is!” he grinned as James turned his head to give him a wink “Cats love the attention”

“I think you’re thinking of dogs” Remus replied, so much for not being involved.

This just prompted a raised eyebrow from the other boy, and no one said anything else as they watched James reach out a hand to pet the tabby cat. In all fairness, it was a pretty cute cat. No one could blame him. 

Except from one person. 

Just as his hand was about to make contact with the animal, it swiftly ducked out of the way, leaped off of the desk and transformed in mid-air with Proffesor McGonagall replacing it.

Many of the students, including Peter, had gasped. Remus himself had slightly opened his mouth, it was a really cool bit of magic and he would be lying if he said he wasn’t curious about it. 

“That was really bloody cool Professor!” James exclaimed eyes wide with shock

“I second that” Sirius whispered to Remus, but apparently McGonagall had some sort of super senses

“Thank you Mr Black” she peered at him through her glasses before looking back at James, giving him a hard stare “and Mr Potter” she nodded “however I urge you to think twice the next time you decide to approach an unknown animal” James turned a little red and looked down at the floor, ashamed. "You understand that if you approach me like that again it will be a detention"

“Ah, yeah sorry about that professor” he started walking toward the seat next to Sirius but stopped halfway and turned around, a small smile playing on his lips, “I do love cats though Professor”

A pause.

“Sit down Potter”

James grinned.

McGonagall then wasted no time at all in explaining how Transfiguration was one of the hardest branches of magic, therefore she expected one hundred percent concentration and focus at all times throughout her lessons.

They then started taking notes and as with all their lessons so far the first years were eager to learn, so naturally they wrote down every bit of information possible and some had even went above and beyond writing down even the most unnecessary parts. An example of this was Lily Evans, who’s quill Remus had noticed was especially loud and especially scratchy and seemed to be an almost continuous noise. It had only been two days.

Last of all, they’d had their very first charms lesson too taught by Professor Flitwick, a tiny little wizard who stood on a pile of precariously placed books at the front of the classroom just so that he could be seen when doing a demonstration. The lesson itself had actually been quite fun and it was all a lot more chilled out than the other subjects had been, he just hoped it would stay that way. 

They still had Defence against the Dark arts, astronomy and potions left to experience, all of which were scheduled on Remus’ timetable for the following week. 

Oh and horror of horrors, flying. They had lessons scheduled for flying. Honestly was it really necessary?

Apparently everyone except him thought so. 

James and Sirius had already gotten into a heated conversation about quidditch with Peter offering his opinions up every now and again, he had mostly been busy sticking up a great big quidditch poster next to his bed.

Remus knew what quidditch was of course, but was he interested? No. 

And he knew it. His father had tried multiple times to explain the excitement of Quidditch to him but Remus had honestly never understood it. Once he had even tried explaining it all to his mum, a muggle, in hopes that she would somehow make Remus a fan. Lyall had probably only tried it because he knew Remus was closer to Hope than he was to him, and Lyall himself wasn't that enthusiastic about sport so wasn't the best person to promote it.

And the whole thing really didn't make sense either because if Remus somehow was interested in the chaos that defined quidditch and actually wanted to participate neither one of his parents would allow him to go ahead with it and actually play it himself because in their eyes he was way too vulnerable for that. Did he want to be seen as vulnerable? No not exactly, but in this instance he didn't really care - no part of him wanted to get involved with Quidditch.

Anyway for now the school week was almost done, he just had to get through the rest of the exhausting weekend and at least on the weekend he could wear his own clothes instead of his now slightly stuffy uniform. 

And oh how embarrassing it had been. Of course Lyall was the type of father to try and teach Remus about sports but not how to tie a simple tie. So on Thursday morning he'd had to ask the entire room if anyone could help him

"Does anyone know how to tie a tie?" he asked looking around helplessly his tie loosely dangling around his neck. Everyone was busy making sure they had all the textbooks they might have needed for the day.

All three of them looked up, surprised. He kind of wanted to kick them, it wasn't that shocking for him to ask a simple question. Was it?

Sirius was the one who stepped up first

"Please" he grinned, making his way over "I took special tie classes when I was younger, my parents even made me practice on the house elf sometimes"

"Bet he loved that" Remus had muttered, not really intending for Sirius to hear him. What in the fuck were tie classes anyway?

"Joy of his life" Sirius nodded, smirking slightly. Remus avoided looking directly forward so he didn't have to look at the other boy's contagious smirk and second to avoid the embarrassment of acknowledging the fact Sirius was so close to him he was practically breathing into his face. 

After a few more seconds, Remus felt like he could breathe again as Sirius stepped back and looked at Remus admiring his work

"Beautiful"

"Thanks" Remus nodded with an appreciative smile

He wasn’t quite sure how he would spend his Saturday and Sunday. There was no tv to watch, no radio to listen to, no chores to help with, so he’d probably just settle in for reading a book. Although if he wanted to do that he’d have to check out the library at some point because Remus had only bought three or four of his own books with him and he was already bored of at least two of them since they had already been read.

He just wasn't certain on how much variety they had. Surely wizards have some fictional stories out there? At least some muggle classics should be held. Or would he just have to go the rest of the year reading spell books and other magical non-fiction? He can't imagine the entire library space is being used for educational books only - not that he'd mind really, it's just nice to have some more choice. 

The second reason he wanted to check out the library was to familiarise himself with it because he was expecting to spend the majority of his free time there.

Libraries are usually places where people are expected to be quiet, but he can't say the same for his dorm room.

Sharing a room with three over-excited boys meant he rarely had a moment of pure peace, and although he kept his distance fairly well by not involving himself in conversations, and sitting slightly away from them he would like to place some more physical distance between them too. The furthest Remus had been from the three of them was when he had been in the Gryffindor common room and they up in their dorm.

He knew he was being anti-social, but he had good reason to be. And yes he wondered what his life would be like if he let himself relax a little, be friends with at least the people he shared a room with, but he couldn't and that was the truth of it. 

Anyway... he wasn't saying he wanted friends or even liked the three boys in his dorm, just that he wondered what would happen if he did.

Maybe they would've explored the castle together just like James and Sirius had mentioned yesterday evening.

Hogwarts was apparently littered with secrets and shortcuts, and this had, at first, been unappealing to him seeing as he already struggled with those bloody staircases and doors, unable to remember how to get to the classroom simply three corridors away. But the more he thought about it the more he saw the usefulness behind it - he would just have to get a grip on his directions first. 

And although Remus couldn’t explore with them, it didn’t mean he couldn’t explore on his own.

He'd probably have to get his map out for that though and try to decipher it because no one, including him, found it very clear as to what was actually drawn out on the paper the school had given them. So he decided he'd work through that on the weekend and whenever he had time after that he would try and use it to get around the castle more efficiently and hopefully find something in the process. 

He would also have to write to his parents on Saturday to tell them what his plans were for the weekend, they already kind of knew but it was his first time being away from home and so they’d worry and want to know, especially Lyall. He really worried about Remus, sometimes for all the wrong reasons, but it was ok, it was only natural.

* * *

"What do you reckon? Which subject will be the hardest?" Peter asked Sirius "I'm not quite sure myself"

"I reckon it's all going to be relatively easy" Sirius hummed, shrugging his shoulders "I mean I do accidental magic all the time, and the lessons we’ve had so far have been really basic" 

"I don't think that's a good thing mate" James replied, concerned “The accidental magic” he added, clarifying.

Sirius shrugged and just beckoned them to carry on walking. It was almost curfew by now, and of course James and Sirius wanted to explore the castle for as long as they could before having to go back - Peter on the other hand looked a bit more cautious

"Shouldn't we start heading back now?" he said looking at James and meeting his eyes which wasn't something he often did so James appreciated it.

"Yeah yeah in a second, I just want to see what's around this corner" he gave Peter quick smile and then just as he wanted, turned the corner. 

It had just lead to another corridor, there was however a very delicate and grand tapestry on the wall to the right that Sirius had immediately gone to investigate, and so James, who had at first stopped to turn back around and start going back to Gryffindor tower, had followed and started inspecting it too. 

James was really hoping to find a secret passageway today, but no luck. The tapestry turned out to be nothing at all, like Peter had said when they had first found it, he had more of a knack for observation than James did and had told them he didn’t think there was anything more to it. James probably should’ve listened.

"Guess you were right Pete" James pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose for the one millionth time that day "Let's head back"

Sirius had protested, but Peter looked relieved that James had listened to him and opted to return to their room. It was hard making both your friends happy at once, unfortunately this time it was Sirius’ turn to bear the short end of the stick.

Lucky they turned around when they did as well, because the journey had turned into more of a trek. None of them could navigate the castle yet, let alone navigate it in the dark, meaning that many wrong turns were made. Their confusion was only made worse by the fact that the staircases kept moving at inconvenient times, sometimes setting them back to where they’d just come from or even making sure the three of them ended up somewhere completely unknown to them four floors above from where they had come from.

It also meant that there had been a lot of arguments. 

James had kept his positive attitude all throughout, trying his best to lead them in the right direction, but Sirius had quickly grown bored and although Peter did try and keep his positivity up for longer than Sirius, he started getting a bit miserable too. Anyway, Sirius’ and Peters bad moods eventually clashed and several arguments broke out between them, they were sick of each other and by the last few flights of stairs (which were now recognisable) James was sick of them arguing, he didn’t show it though and just made them apologise to each other once they had safely made it back to Gryffindor common room.

The first thing he noticed upon getting back up to their dorm was that Remus wasn't there. Now Remus had gone off on his own at some point in the day, he didn't remember when or why, but he should've been back by now. 

"James where’s Remus disappeared off to?" Sirius asked almost immediately on entrance

"Good question Sirius" James replied "I don’t know"

"Should be back by now, I doubt he's out and about"

"I have a feeling your doubts are wrong” James said gesturing at Remus’ empty bed. If he wasn’t in the room with them, then of course he was going to be out and about.

Sirius scoffed “I just meant it’s not like him to miss curfew”

Peter was the one who replied this time “How do you know what’s like him?”

“That’s not the point” Sirius waved him off “James come on we need to do something!”

He looked at Sirius for a second before nodding. 

To hell with curfew, they were going on a manhunt.

“So what are we going to do then?” Peter asked glancing nervously between the two boys

“Ask McGonagall, she’ll know” he nodded assuringly and before anyone could say anything else he walked toward the door and left, with Sirius and eventually Peter following behind him.

The three of them found their way to her office easily enough, luckily it had been a direct route so there was no faffing around like last time. They then knocked on the door which opened about 5 seconds later, Professor McGonagall standing there.

“Mr Potter, Mr Black and Mr Pettigrew, I hope you have good reason to be knocking on my door after curfew” she peered down at them through her glasses

“We absolutely do” Sirius replied without hesitation

James carried on “Do you happen to know where Remus is?”

She looked at him with curiosity and hesitated slightly when she replied with “I do happen to know where Mr Lupin is”

"Brilliant!" he quietly clasped his hands together "where is he then?" he looked around eagerly like Remus was just going to pop out of nowhere

"I cannot tell you that information, Mr Potter."

"Sure you can" 

McGonagall gave him a stern look and before she could say anything else Sirius pleaded, holding strong eye contact with her

“Please Professor” 

“We’re just worried about him is all” James added on hurriedly

“I understand Mr. Potter”

“You do?” James asked, surprised

“Yes, I’m not soulless” she seemed almost amused at the thought “but unfortunately what you’re asking for is not my information to tell.”

James looked over at Sirius and his face fell a bit. James was disappointed too, this obviously wasn’t something he could push for.

“I can however assure you that Remus is safe and will be returning”

“When?” he asked

Again McGonagall hesitated a bit before replying  “I assume sometime tomorrow”

“Ah, ok then” James nodded “Goodnight Professor”

“Goodnight boys”

They returned to their dorm. That was that then. James would ask Remus himself tomorrow  but for now he’d have to put it to rest.

6th September

“Well at least we know he’s not dying” Sirius said after James had commented on Remus’ empty bed upon waking up in the morning

“Yeah, we’ll know the truth soon anyway” James nodded “On a much better note, today we have our first flying lesson!” 

James loved flying, he’d been doing it ever seen he got a broom which was when he was practically a baby. It had only been one of those child-safe ones, the ones that were pretty much useless and could only hover a maximum of a foot off the ground. Not very exciting, but he had fallen in love all the same. Then as he got older he’d been allowed a proper broom and he loved using it, loved looking after it, even just loved looking at it. It was crazy persons behaviour, he knew. But he really did love his broom. Unfortunately at Hogwarts, first-years weren’t allowed brooms, so he had to leave his precious broom at home for his dad to polish and trim instead. Anyway, it didn’t make him any less excited for flying, a players broom was only as good as the player themself and so although he wasn’t keen on using the school brooms he knew it would 1. Be good practice and 2. Not stop him from flying as he always did (which was excellently). He couldn’t wait to show off, especially to the Slytherins and Snivellus whom they were sharing their lesson with today.

He would just have to be careful, his Dad had warned him in his last letter that the school brooms had a tendency to start vibrating if you flew a bit too high and that ninety nine percent of them had some outdated steering control. Nothing James couldn’t handle though.

That very same morning, period one, Sirius, Peter, James and the other Gryffindors hurried down the front steps onto the grounds for their first flying lesson. It was a clear, breezy day, and the grass rippled under their feet as they marched down the sloping lawns towards the quidditch pitch which was on a smooth, flat lawn on the opposite side of the grounds to the forbidden forest. The Slytherins were already there, and so were twenty broomsticks lying in neat lines on the ground. 

Another thing, or should he say person, that was there, was Remus Lupin.

“Remus!” James exclaimed “Where the hell have you been!”

“Oh!” Remus jumped “Uhm I was in the hospital wing”

“Were you not feeling well?!” Sirius asked

“Why didn’t you tell us?” James followed on

“Are you ok now?” 

The other boy looked a bit overwhelmed with all the questions

“Well I didn’t want to bother you with it” Remus gave a sort of nod, and shuffled back away from them a bit “I’m fine now though”

“Good to hear” James patted him on his slightly tense shoulder. He was acting a bit strange, but James didn’t think too much into it, the lesson was starting.

Hooch had started off with the very basics, how to get the broom up in the first place. James didn’t think it was a necessary step but he guessed that some muggle-borns didn’t know how to even begin working a broomstick so he just zoned out for all the boring bits. 

Then they had to put themselves into two groups, the people who were already confident flyers and the people who had never done it before/needed more help and direction. 

First the ones who had deemed themselves to be confident were given a quick flying assessment by Hooch. James wanted to impress her so when it was his turn he flew some simple laps and then performed all the various tricks he knew making sure to include the most complicated of spins and dives.

When he came back down Hooch had given him an approving nod to say that he’d passed the assessment. No surprises there. He looked for everyone else's reaction, most of the other students hadn’t even seemed to watch him.  Sirius and Peter, who were in the confident flyers group too, had smiled and given a thumbs up, Remus didn’t look bothered, however he had heard Lily Evans make a comment to her friend Mary

“It’s not a talent show, I don’t know what he thinks he’s playing at”

“Everything is a talent show Evans” he grinned at her

“No, you’re just competitive” the girl rolled her eyes at him. James thought it was quite endearing actually

“And arrogant” A snide voice said. Snape.

He hadn’t even been talking to Lily! Why had he just suddenly popped up? Why was he listening in in the first place?

“Don’t worry Lily, he’ll regret it when he breaks his neck one day, and he realises that no one cares about his flying”

“Awh Snivellous, I’m honoured that you were watching my assessment” James said pretending to be heart-warmed. “Would you like an autograph?”

“Fame isn’t everything Potter”

“I think he’s just jealous that he can’t tell one end of a broomstick from the other ” Sirius said standing by his side. A few people in the class were now listening to James’ and Snape's argument.

“Even if he could all that greasy hair would just weigh him down” he snickered. That was a good one

James saw him struggle to come back with something for a moment “As long as I don’t struggle as much as Lupin apparently does”

Remus looked up from where he was sitting on the grass “What about me?”

James didn’t see why Snape had to bring Remus into this, he hadn’t been involved at all!

“You put yourself into the beginners group Lupin, how awful must you be to place yourself there? I don’t see Potter and Black criticising you for not being able to fly”

As Remus was opening his mouth to say something Evans turned to Snape, looking offended

“Severus I think you’re forgetting I’m in the beginners group as well” she reminded him, furiously

“That’s different you’re muggle-born, Lupin is a wizard’s name” 

“But you’re saying all muggle-borns are awful at flying” she stared down at him, hands on hips. You tell him Evans

“I’m sorry Lily, I wasn’t saying that” Snape attempted to defend himself, and he genuinely did look sorry. James didn't care though, he had still implied it.

“The hell you were” Lily whipped her red hair round and stormed off to where Mary was standing.

Severus called out after Lily and had made to follow her but Sirius stopped him “Oooo Snivellous looks like you’re in trouble with your girlfriend now”

He shot daggers at James’ best-friend and he still obviously couldn’t think of anything to say back so turned his attention back to Remus

“So Lupin, you’re a wizard who can’t fly”

“Every wizard can fly Snape” Remus said cooly “I just prefer not to, sorry for wanting to keep my feet firmly on the ground”

“You’ll only die if you’re as over-confident as Potter here is”

“Mate that’s basically a death threat” James advanced towards him, filled with anger.

There had been absolutely no reason for Snape to bring Lupin into this, and he knew he’d only done it because he couldn’t think of a good enough comeback. James quite despised Snape, had done since he had joined their compartment on the train, his entrance had been rather rude, plus his preferred house had been Slytherin which is exactly where he’d ended up.

“I think that’s why I’ve always preferred chocolate frogs to chocolate cauldrons” James explained “Just th-” he was however cut off by a girl.

She had fiery red-hair, and sparkling green eyes, and she had just opened the compartment door

“Do you mind if we sit here?” she asked as James looked at her mouth slightly open, a little stunned,and then he snapped out of it and looked behind her to see a skinny, pale faced, black-haired boy whose sour expression made him look like he'd rather be anywhere else .

“Not at all” James shook his head earnestly “The more the merrier!” and he gave a large grin, excited to make some new friends. 

Although he hadn’t been sure they were going to be friends as the pale-faced boy had grunted quite unpleasantly when James had welcomed them in

“I’m Lily Evans and this is Severus Snape” 

They all followed suit by introducing themselves, but once they had ,they didn’t seem very interested in talking to the rest of them, so James just let them be. Actually in his opinion it was mostly Snape who’d been interested in talking only with the person he’d come in with, Lily looked like she wanted to ask questions to all of them but was too stuck in the conversation she was already in to do so. James didn’t pick up a good feeling from the Severus boy, like at all.

His feelings about him were confirmed just a few minutes later when he'd overheard Severus say something quite concerning

"I wouldn't worry about it Lily, muggles don't understand much"

"What?" Lily and James said in unison

James stepped up as he asked "What do you have against muggles?"

"Nothing" the other boy said "If you were apart of our conversation then you'd understand I didn't mean it like that"

"Evans doesn't seem to think so" James raised an eyebrow

Lily obviously seemed to sense things were headed in the wrong direction so she asked James if he could just stay out of it for now and let them carry on their conversation.

And he did as she asked, for about three minutes anyway.

“You’d better be in Slytherin,” said Snape, snapping James out of the conversation he was having with the others

That had been the cherry on top. 

James felt like a bull as he stomped closer up to Snape, he wasn’t sure if he was actually going to do anything, he had Sirius by his side if he did though. 

Anyway Hooch stopped him before anything could happen.

“Boys, what on earth is happening over here?” she came running over to break it up “I don’t need any fighting in my lesson today thank you very much”

James just apologised to Hooch for the disruption. Snape didn’t even have the courtesy to say sorry, he just grunted and turned away. Rude tosser.

The next order of business was to check up on Remus 

“Hey you ok?” he plonked himself down next to his friend. 

“I think he needs a ‘kick me’ sign stuck on his back”  Remus snorted “He’s obviously got issues”

That gave James an idea,