Scream

James stared at the flyer in his hands, the paper creasing in his hold. Next to him, his best friend in the whole world, Sirius Black, had a copy of the same flyer in his own hand, also reading it. Sirius was a very handsome young man, with raven black hair going down to his shoulders, mysterious grey eyes that spoke of trouble, and full lips that seemed to always be curved into a smirk. He wore a leather jacket everywhere he went, accompanied by his beloved ripped jeans, making him the perfect picture of the heartthrob bad boy he always tried to be.

Gideon and Fabian Prewett, red haired twins who were in the same year as James and probably some of the richest kids in the school, were hosting a party Friday night, the flyer in his hands said.

“We need to go to this,” Sirius said, waving the flyer around in James’s face even though he had one of his own. Gideon and Fabian had scattered the papers all around the school, making sure every student at Hogwarts knew about it.

Hogwarts was a prestigious private school, full of rich kids and the few students lucky enough to get in via scholarships. This meant that whenever Hogwarts kids threw parties, you knew it would be big.

“I know, mate,” James said, swatting Sirius’s hand out of his face. “I have my own here, see?” he waved his own paper.

“Pretty sure every kid in the school will have their own,” Remus Lupin, one of James’s closet friends, commented. He was a tall kid, one of the tallest in the school, with sandy blonde hair, a lanky frame, and freckles covering his face. He was also one of the kids relying on a scholarship, meaning he wasn’t born into wealth like most of the students at Hogwarts, and while James would never dream of holding that against him there were some pretty despicable people in the school who did.

Sirius threw his flyer into a nearby trashcan. “That just means we have to go even more now. Can’t risk missing out on the biggest party of the year.”

James and Remus shared a look, rolling their eyes. Sirius had always been a little obsessed with his reputation as one of most popular boys in school. That meant he had to be at every big event Hogwarts students would be at, so they could continue to fawn over him outside of school as well.

James and Remus were also quite popular, as well as their other friend Peter Pettigrew who was currently late to school again. The four of them made up the Marauders, as they liked to call themselves, and they were beloved by most of the student body.

The three boys entered their classroom and sat down at their usual spots near the back of the class, all of them waiting on Peter. Just as the bell went a short pudgy boy with brown hair and chubby face entered the room, narrowly avoiding detention for being late. He looked around the room, spotted James, Sirius, and Remus, and hurried towards them.

“Peter! Arrived just on time,” Sirius exclaimed when Peter sat down. “I’m proud of you mate.”

Peter rolled his eyes. “Oh shut up, would you?”

Sirius let out a cackle but did quieten down as the teacher started speaking. James, whose mind was fixed firmly upon the party on Friday night, didn’t hear any of what the teacher was saying. He was too busy thinking about what it was going to be like, and who he really wanted to go to the party with. He knew he wouldn’t be able to, but still the longing was there, a dull ache that always seemed to follow James around whenever he wasn’t with that one special person.

Class went by quickly, as did the next one, and the next, until before James knew it lunch was starting, and Sirius was beckoning him over to the table they always sat on.

“Uh, hang on, I forgot something in my locker,” James lied. “I’ll be back.”

James, free from his friends, travelled through the hallways of the school quickly, eager to see his special person that was waiting for him. He arrived at the door to the top of the school and opened it, the wind slamming into him as soon as he stepped onto the roof.

He didn’t care one bit, feeling like he could finally breathe again when his eyes landed on the person at the edge of the roof, staring into the horizon. His person.
“Regulus,” James breathed, and the boy turned around, a smile on his face as soon as he spotted James.

Regulus was beautiful. Breathtakingly gorgeous, like an angel sent from heaven just for James. He had soft lucious black curls that were always in prim condition, and ivory white skin with no blemishes in sight. He had one of the sharpest jawlines James had ever seen, with high cheekbones and dark grey eyes that always seemed to draw James in. He was the best thing James had ever seen.

James walked across the roof in quick strides until Regulus was in his arms and he was kissing him, feeling his chest relax and the dull ache leave because he was home. It was addicting, what Regulus made him feel, and James couldn’t get enough of it.

“Hey,” James greeted softly when they pulled back.

Regulus moved himself further into James’s embrace. “Hi.”

James stroked his hand through Regulus’s hair, feeling like everything was right in the world now that he was with Regulus. “How’s your day been?”

Regulus shrugged, burying his head into the crook of James’s neck. “It’s been okay,” was his muffled response.

James took a deep breath, prepearing himself for what he was about to say. “There’s a party happen and Gid and Fab’s this Friday. I know we can’t go together, but would you want to go to the party at the same time I went, so we’d be able to see each other there?”

Regulus took a step back, closing off the way he always did whenever their… situation was mentioned. They’d been together for 12 months, but they’d always kept their relationship a secret. Not because they were both queer; everyone already knew that James was pansexual and Regulus was gay.

No, the reason they hid their relationship was because of Sirius, Regulus Black’s brother. They didn’t have a good relationship. At one point, years ago, they were like two peas in one pod, but as time went on the abusive household they were both forced to grow up in changed them and turned them against one another. When Sirius left the house and moved in with James a year and a half ago that was the end of their relationship, and now they both pretend the other doesn’t exist.

The problem with that is that James loved them both. Sirius was like his brother, his best friend, the one person who really understood him. They could have a whole conversation without talking and always seemed to know what the other was feeling. He was like James’s soulmate, the one person who knew all of James’s secrets.

Regulus though. He was something different, something from another world. He was the person who made James smile the most, the person he always found himself thinking about. He was the reason James was on this earth; to love Regulus Black, who was made just for James and no one else.

So James was stuck, unable to choose one over the other, meaning his relationship with Regulus was forced to be a secret. Regulus had never been happy about it, but he never stopped it because he knew it was the only way he’d be able to have James. At least for now. James would figure out some way to tell Sirius, eventually, just not any time soon.

“I know it’s not the same as going there together,” James tried, “but I want to be there with you. No one else. That’s why I’m asking you this.”

Regulus sighed, glancing up at James through his long lashes. James craved to hold him again, but knew that Regulus needed his space, especially about this. James just hoped that Regulus would say yes; that they would be able to have whatever small pieces of each other that they could.

“I’ll think about it,” Regulus eventually answered, giving James a tight smile. “I need to go now, though, so I’ll see you later.”

James watched as Regulus walked away without even a hug goodbye. He knew things were hard for Regulus at home, knew that whenever things got too hard for him he would just switch off and feel nothing. It still hurt, though, seeing Regulus upset and being unable to do anything. Being the reason why he’s upset.

James left the roof a few minutes after Regulus, meeting back up with his friends. He laughed with them when Peter made a joke. Pretended to vomit when Remus and Sirius went heavy on the PDA. Returned all of his friend’s smiles and pretended to be fine.

In reality he was still thinking about Regulus, hoping he was okay. Regulus, the love of his life. Regulus, his boyfriend. Regulus, Sirius’s little brother.

Regulus.

. . .

There was about an hour before the party started and James and Sirius were busy getting ready for it. James helped tie up the corset Sirius wanted to wear, only to untie it 20 minutes later when Sirius decided to switch from feminine to masculine. James pondered whether he should wear a tie or not, only to end up decide that a tie was too formal.

James helped straighten Sirius’s hair and put tiny braids in it. Sirius helped put some light makeup on James. James watched as Sirius meticulously did his eyeliner, looking like a badass. Sirius put on Taylor Swift and they both sang the chorus at the top of their lungs.

When they were finally ready, they got into James’s car and drove to Gideon and Fabian’s house. As started earlier, they were some of the richest kids at Hogwarts, so James and Sirius weren’t surprised when they pulled up at a sprawling mansion at least 4 stories high.

There was a fountain out the front, and, having been there before, James knew there was also a fountain in the entrance hall. Gideon and Fabian’s parents both worked in the military in very high positions and were constantly bringing in the money.

James and Sirius left the car and met up with Remus and Peter by the door. They were accompanied by Frank Longbottom, another close friend of James’s who was a year older than them and had graduated last year. Frank was tall, not as tall as Remus though, with short black hair neatly slicked back. He had kind brown eyes and had been James’s role model since he first met him.

“James, Sirius, good to see you,” Frank greeted when he saw them, wrapping James into a quick hug before doing the same with Sirius.

“Didn’t know you were coming,” Sirius said with a grin, also having a soft spot for Frank.

Frank shrugged, a smile on his face. “Decided to surprise you.”

“Bloody good surprise it is,” James said, slapping Frank on the back as they all entered the house. Mansion was a better word for it, but even then it still didn’t catch all of the splendidness of the place. Lush carpets and polished wooden staircases. Countless artifacts that cost more than James’s school tuition placed around the house. Extravagant furniture at every turn and expensive paintings done by some of the most famous painters of the nineteenth century.

“Boys! So glad you could make it!” Gideon exclaimed when he spotted them enter. “I’m sure you can find your own way around, and if you can’t just give us a shout and we’ll see what we can do.”

With that Gideon darted away to some other guests, in constant motion as the host of the party. James smiled fondly and continued further into the house with the rest of his friends. They ended up finding a large loungeroom that most people were staying at, so they claimed a few couches near the fireplace and waited for their other friends to arrive.

Soon enough, three girls waltzed into the room, all of them looking like goddesses. Lily Evans, Marlene McKinnon, and Mary MacDonald, three of the most popular girls at school.

Lily had fiery red hair to match her personality and intense emerald green eyes that made one’s mouth go dry when they were focused on them. Marlene had blonde hair swept into a ponytail and hazel brown eyes that spoke of competition. Mary had curled black hair and beautiful brown skin that matched perfectly with the golden hoops she always wore.

The three girls walked towards the boys and settled down around them, the group finally complete. These were James’s people. These were the people he cared about most in the world, excluding Regulus, of course, who would always be the one to have his heart.

The party was at full blast, all of James’s friends talking and laughing with one another, yet James’s eyes were trained on the doorway, hoping that Regulus would be the next one to enter. He felt his heart leap into his throat when he spotted Evan Rosier, Barty Crouch, and Dorcas Meadowes enter, the three of them being some of Regulus’s closest friends, but there was no Regulus trailing after them, causing disappointment to fill James.

“She’s so pretty,” Marlene complained.

James followed her gaze and found Dorcas Meadowes mid laugh. Marlene had been crushing on Dorcas for ages yet had never managed to talk to her.

“Go talk to her,” Lily suggested.

Marlene, much more drunk that James realised, immediately stood up and walked towards Dorcas, surprising everyone. They all watched as Marlene struck up a conversation with Dorcas, and after a while they both slunk away down a hallway.

Everyone whooped and cheered, glad that Marlene was finally getting the girl she had been pining for, but James’s mind had strayed towards Regulus and where he might be, making James feel bad.

He decided to try and get his mind off Regulus, instead focusing on Lily who was already on her way to being flat-out drunk. She was spinning around the place, laughing as the world seemed to swirl before her, and James made sure to catch her when she eventually stumbled and fell.

That’s how he found himself with Lily Evans resting her head against his chest, the both of them spread out across the couch as conversation filtered through the group. James happened to look up and felt his breath catch when he spotted Regulus in the entrance of the room, staring at Lily sprawled on top of him.

He noticed James’s gaze and immediately turned around and left, making James worry. Regulus had always been jealous of Lily after James had dated her for a few months last year, and no matter what James did or said, Lily was always a sore point for him.

Seeing her all over James, even if it wasn’t like that, obviously wouldn’t be very easy for Regulus, and James longed to make sure he was okay. James passed Lily off to someone else, making up an excuse about needing the bathroom and slipped through the crowd, managing to find Regulus just before he left the house.

“Regulus wait,” James said, fingers curling over Regulus’s wrist in an attempt to stop him from leaving.

Regulus stiffened and turned around, the same closed off expression on his face that was always there whenever he was hurting.

“Don’t mind me, I would hate to ruin your fun,” Regulus spat, glaring daggers in the direction of where Lily was.

“Hey, I don’t like her anymore, okay? She was just drunk,” James explained quietly. “You’re the one I like. The one I’m madly in love with, not her.”

Regulus stared at him sceptically. “You’re telling me you have no left over feelings for her?”

“None,” James answered immediately. “I love you, Regulus. I’ll always love you, no matter what. I promise.”

Regulus looked up at James, eyes shining with fondness as he brushed his hand against James’s. There were still a lot of people around, so they couldn’t do any overt displays of affection, but they could talk to one another. The music was too loud for anyone else to be able to overhear any conversation they might have.

“Really?” Regulus breathed.

James smiled, staring at the boy he loved with his whole heart.

“Really.”

James walked back into the loungeroom where his friends were, Regulus trailing a few paces behind him. When James looked back, though, Regulus had already disappeared, probably in search of his friends, so James reluctantly sat back down on the couch with his own friends.

“Where’s Lily?” he asked, noticing the red head’s absence.

“Gone to the loo,” Mary answered.

James smirked. Of course Mary would know where Lily is. She’d been madly in love with her for years, even before James had started dating Lily. They hadn’t gotton along for a while, until James had managed to extract the secret from Mary and realised why she hated him. After that, James broke up with Lily, because while he still had feelings for her, he didn’t love her like Mary did and knew Mary deserved to be with her.

Mary hadn’t made her move yet though, still trying to hide her feelings from the girl that was obviously in love with her back. James had seen the way Lily looked at Mary when they were together. Another reason he broke up with her.

It was a while later when James spotted Regulus in the same room as him, talking to Barty and Evan. It was obvious he had just arrived there, because James would have noticed if he’d been there for longer. Taking out his phone, James sent a message to Regulus.

He watched as Regulus took out his phone and then read the message, grinning as Regulus looked around the room in search of James, finally landing his gaze on him. James felt like he was livewire when Regulus stared at him like that, and desperately wanted to whisk him away to an empty room.

Regulus texted something back, and before James knew it they were having a conversation together on other sides of the room, yet it was as if they were right next to each other. James smiled at something Regulus texted, about to type a response when he was interrupted by a blood curdling scream.

James’s head shot up in the direction of the sound and then he was running towards it, praying that nothing bad had happened. He skidded to a stop when he found Mary standing in the doorway of a bathroom, staring at something with wide eyes and trembling hands.

Slowly, James walked behind her and looked over her shoulder, feeling his stomach drop when he saw Lily, sprawled on the floor with a pool of blood beneath her. Her shirt was drenched with blood and had holes in it where a knife had presumably stabbed her.

James felt his head spin, heard ringing in his ears as he stared at his friend, dead on the floor. How could this happen? How could Lily be dead? Who did this? Questions plagued his mind, but he was too busy trying to process that Lily was dead to properly think about what this might mean.

People were crowding around them. There were screams. Sobs. Someone shouted about a dead body and then everyone was running towards the exit. Mary left, a wailing mess as she ran, and James was left there, staring at the dead body of his friend.

Someone murdered Lily. There was a murderer in the house, and they killed Lily. Lily, the girl with the highest score in class. The girl James had laughed with, loved even, once upon a time. She was dead. Lily was dead.

James felt a hand on his shoulder and was brought back to reality, turning around to find Sirius’s panicked face.

“We need to go, mate,” he said, already steering James towards the exit.

James, disoriented, let him, and nearly left the house until he spotted Barty and Evan running towards the exit as well.

Regulus.

Horrified that he had forgotten him, James broke away from Sirius’s grip and ran towards Evan and Barty, grabbing the latter’s wrist so they couldn’t escape him.

“Where’s Regulus?” he asked.

The boys were too panicked to properly think about how weird that was, thankfully, so they didn’t question why he wanted to know.

“I don’t know,” Barty said, tugging his arm free from James. “He said he needed to find someone.”

With that, the two boys left, and James looked around the crowd of people struggling to exit the house, wondering where Regulus was. He was obviously looking for James, and James couldn’t leave without knowing that Regulus was safe.

“Dude, what are you doing? We need to go,” Remus said when they managed to find James again.

“We can’t,” James said. “Regulus is still here.”

Sirius blinked, surprised. “Regulus is here?”

James nodded. “I saw him, but I didn’t see him leave and Barty and Evan said he was still here.”

Sirius glanced around, as if Regulus would be standing right behind him, but he didn’t find him. “He’s probably gone, James.”

James shook his adamantly. “He’s still here, I know it.”

Before Sirius had time to say anything else Mary ran towards them, tear tracks on her cheeks and wide, terrified eyes staring at them desperately.

“I can’t find Marlene,” she sobbed. “I can’t leave without her, but I don’t know where she is, and I’m not sure if she’s okay and- “

“Woah, Mary, calm down,” James said soothingly, rubbing Mary’s back. “We need to find Regulus, so we can find Marlene on the way.”

Mary nodded, not even questioning why they needed to find Regulus, and leaned into James’s touch, letting him comfort her as he shared a look with Sirius.

“Well, we’d better find them fast,” Frank said. “Come on, follow me.”

So the group of terrified, vulnerable teenagers made their way through the giant mansion, searching all the rooms on the first floor that they could find. James felt his heart racing and could only imagine the others were feeling a similar fear. His gaze found Sirius and a sudden urge to protect him rose inside James.

Sirius and James were best friends. Brothers. Soulmates. They’re hearts beat in sync with one another. James couldn’t let anything happen to him, nor the rest of his friends. He’d get them out of there, just as soon as they found Marlene, who was probably with Dorcas, and Regulus.

The house had gone silent, everyone else having fled it. James took the lead, slowly opening doors and peering inside them. It was when they reached the last hallway on the first floor that they found them.

Dorcas and Marlene, bloody hands centimetres apart, almost as if they were reaching for one another, eyes closed and faces peaceful.

They were dead.

James heard screams but didn’t realise they belonged to him until he felt Sirius’s arms wrap around him and heard his hurried whispers trying to comfort him.

They were dead. Marlene and Dorcas were dead, just like Lily.

James heard someone else scream and turned to find Peter bolting down the hallway, away from Marlene and Dorcas’s corpses. The others ran after him and James, sensing his friend in danger, snapped out of his own grief and ran after them.

They found Peter at the front door, franticly trying to pull the door open but to no avail. He turned his head when he heard their footsteps and looked at James in the eye as fear washed across his face.

“It’s locked,” he whispered.

No. No, no, no. This couldn’t be happening. James ran to the door, hoping that Peter just didn’t put enough force into opening the door, but even as James pulled, pulled, pulled, the door didn’t open. He heard rather than saw Remus run to one of the windows and turned to see the result.

They were also locked.

James recalled Fabian telling him one time that their parents were away a lot of the time, so they’d installed security measures on all of the windows. For some reason, they were activated, and they wouldn’t be able to break the glass because Fabian had also told James that the glass could withstand a bullet without breaking.

“You won’t be able to open it,” James rasped. Everyone’s eyes turned to him. “Security measures on all of the windows. The glass is too strong to break.”

He didn’t say it, but everyone heard the next words stuck in his throat.

They were trapped.

Frank fished out his phone and James let out a sigh of relief. They could call the police, and everything would be fine, and even if Frank didn’t have any battery left, James knew for a fact that he did.

So why was Frank’s expression so broken.? Why was he staring at his phone like all his dreams had just been crushed? Like there was no hope for escape.

“There’s no signal,” he said roughly.

No signal. No signal, no signal, no signal-

“Fuck,” he heard Sirius mutter.

A silence descended upon the group, one full of hopelessness and devastation.

“What if the killer is still in the house?” Remus eventually spoke, voicing everyone’s thoughts.

What if whoever killed Lily and Marlene and Dorcas was still here? What if they were planning James’s death right then and there? They were trapped in a mansion with no hope of escape or rescue, with a murderer possibly in there with them.

Everyone was glancing around, as if the murderer was about to jump out and stab them then and there. James’s mind strayed back to Regulus. He was somewhere in here, possibly still looking for him, or hiding away because he’d heard everyone’s screams. He could be hurt. James needed find him, to make sure he was okay.

“We still need to find Regulus,” James said, taking action. “This is a big fucking house, so I propose we split into pairs so we can search more ground quicker. Once we find Regulus, we can try and come up with a way to escape. Everyone okay with that?”

“That’s how everyone dies in horror movies,” Peter spoke up.

Sirius scoffed. “This isn’t a fucking horror movie, Wormtail. This is real life.”

Wormtail, a nickname they’d came up with for Peter. There was also Prongs for James, Padfoot for Sirius, and Moony for Remus.

Peter shrunk away from Sirius’s words, flinching as if he’d been hit. James shot Sirius a look and comfortingly squeezed Peter’s shoulders.

“It’s okay Peter,” he assured. “We’ll be alright. You can pair we me if you’d like.”

Peter nodded quickly, so it was up to Remus, Sirius, Mary, and Frank to pair up. James could see Sirius wanted to pair with Remus, but he could also tell that Sirius would feel safer with Frank, so when Mary chose to pair with Remus, Sirius didn’t complain much.

They decided where they would all look, and then they split up, James casting one last glance at his friends before he left with Peter for the fourth floor. While James and Peter search all of the fourth floor, Sirius and Frank were assigned to the third floor, and Mary and Remus were in charge of the second floor. They’d all already checked the first floor when searching for Marlene, so they left that floor empty.

Peter and James searched the fourth floor silently, neither of them feeling much like talking. James was always looking everywhere, gaze darting left and right like the killer was going to pop out in front of them at any moment. James didn’t even know if the killer was in the house, but he knew that if they were he would be stupid not be wary.

“I’m scared, James,” Peter whispered after they’d finished searching yet another room. They still had about half the floor to check, so they continued on, walking through a long hallway.

“It’s okay,” James said, trying to be comforting. He hated seeing his friends scared, even if they had reason to be. “We just gotta find Regulus and then we’ll be fine. The murderer probably isn’t even here.”

Just as he said that, though, Peter let out a scream and James’s head snapped to the direction Peter was looking at, feeling his skin crawl when he saw someone at the end of the hallway, holding a silver knife that glinted in the dim light of a nearby lamp.

The killer was wearing a Ghostface costume, the white mask shaped like someone screaming in pain, or maybe it was fear. Either way, it made James want to turn around and bolt, which was unusual because James usually considered himself a rather brave person. The rest of the outfit was just a black cloak with a hood thrown over the top of the mask, though James noticed the killer was wearing black gloves.

“Pete, run,” James ordered, grabbing Peter’s arm and running away just as the killer started moving after them.

James ran as fast as he could, chest panting as he pushed more and more, needing to go faster and faster. Peter wasn’t as fast as him though, and eventually started to lag behind. James knew they had to find somewhere to hide, with Peter being unable to run for much longer, so he made them turn into the first room James saw and slammed the door shut.

There wasn’t a lock on the door, so James pushed the first piece of furniture he could against the door. A wardrobe. After that was a bedside table, and then a desk followed by a chair, until James was satisfied that the killer wouldn’t be able to enter without a struggle.

He then turned to Peter who was hyperventilating, each breath coming out quick and short as he stared at the door with wide eyes. There were tears in his eyes, as well as on his cheeks and James longed to get rid of his pain.

“Hey, hey, you’re okay,” James said, trying to get Peter to calm down. “You’re safe. I’ll protect you I promise. Nothing bad will happen to you.”

Peter let out a hiccup, finally calming down a bit, until suddenly his hands clapped across his face, and he mumbled something before running into the bathroom connected to the room they were in. James heard the unmistakable sound of someone vomiting into the toilet and winced.

When the vomiting sounds had subsided and James was no longer panicking about Peter, James looked around at his surroundings, wondering if he’d recognise the room. He’d been the Gideon and Fabian’s house many times before, but he still hadn’t explored the whole house so there was a big chance he was in a room he hadn’t been in before.

James felt relief when he recognised the room, though. It was Fabian’s, and James remembered being in the room multiple times before, playing video games with Fabian and Gideon, whose room was right next door, connected by the bathroom-

James’s eyes widened and he ran at top speed to the bathroom, but he was too late. Peter lay there, bleeding out as he clutched his belly, trying to keep his intestines inside his stomach. James blanched and fell to his knees scrambling towards Peter.

“I’m so sorry,” James whispered, voice cracking as he held Peter in his arms. “I’m so, so, sorry.”

“James,” Peter whimpered. “James I don’t want to die. I’m not ready to die. James please.”

James let out a sob, holding Peter closer to him as his friend started to take his last breath. He squeezed his eyes shut as he heard the rattling cut off mid breath, and then there was nothing. No noise besides James’s own sniffling.

James sat there, hunched over Peter’s dead body as he cried for the loss of his friend.

He wasn’t sure how long he stayed holding Peter’s body. It could have been minutes. It could have been hours. He’d stopped crying. Now he was just staring at his friend’s lifeless corpse, unable to fully believe that he was dead.

James was snapped out of his trance when he heard the floor creak, his heart racing, and he crawled backwards away from Peter’s body and the bathroom as quietly as he could, grabbing Fabian’s baseball bat that was leaning against the wall.

He stood upright, hands tight around the bat as he crept closer to the bathroom and where he’d heard the creak. He’d swing the bat if he needed to. He didn’t want to, but he knew if it came to it he would.

There was another creak, closer this time, and then another, and then someone was turning the corner into the bathroom and James was raising the bat to swing, about to bring it down when he recognised Sirius standing there, staring at James with a mix of relief and concern.

James let out a whimper and let his arm drop, the bat hanging limply by his side as he stared at his best friend. Frank walked in after him, but James only had eyes for Sirius, launching himself towards him until they were hugging, holding each other as tightly as possible.

“We heard screaming,” Frank said. “What happened- “

He stopped speaking abruptly, no doubt spotting the dead body of Peter Pettigrew lying on the floor. James squeezed his eyes shut as he heard Sirius choke out a sob and hugged him tighter as he felt him start to shake. They’d lost one of their best friends, their fellow Marauder. How could they be the Marauders with only three members? It wouldn’t be right without Peter. Nothing felt like it would be right without Peter.

“What happened?” Sirius managed to choke out in between his tears.

James pulled away from Sirius to stare at the body of his friend, his fellow Marauder, his family. “We found the murderer and started running, but Pete couldn’t run much longer so we locked ourselves in here. Peter went into the bathroom, and then I realised that we were in Fab’s room and that Gideon’s room was connected to it. When I got to the bathroom he was already dying.”

Sirius only cried more at the response, but it was the quiet type of crying, where he shook violently as he supressed all the painful sounds his body was trying to release. Sirius never let people hear how much he was in pain, never let them hear him cry, a habit he no doubt picked up while living with the Blacks.

“We need to go,” Frank said. “I know you don’t want to leave Peter, but we’ve got to get to Mary and Remus now that we know the murderer is still in the house.”

“And Regulus,” James added. “We need to find him too.”

Sirius shot him a look, one that held suspicion in it and James looked away, trying to calm his rising heartbeat as he pretended like that look didn’t affect him at all. Sirius couldn’t find out about him and Regulus. Not now, when all these terrible things were happening. It would only make Sirius’s response worse, and James wanted it to be as easy as possible when he told Sirius about Regulus.

They left the room and Peter’s body, James feeling like he was betraying Peter by doing so. Shouldn’t they take his body with them? Shouldn’t they keep it with them at all times until it was safe to truly mourn him? James didn’t want to leave Peter’s body, because it felt like leaving him, like admitting he was dead, and James wasn’t sure he was ready for that.

He didn’t have a choice though, and so they left Peter’s body and hurried through the mansion, down the stairs and down again until they were on the second floor where Mary and Remus should be. They didn’t split up, knowing that the last time they did that someone died. Instead, they stuck together, each looking out for the other, eyes searching the floor for any sign of Remus and Mary or the killer.

If James wasn’t so terrified, he’d probably take the time to have a proper look at his surroundings. Being in Gideon and Fabian’s house always left him breathless, because it was so big and extravagant. James was rich, yes, but not this rich. He could probably fit his house in here twice over, and his house was big.

Yet James found himself not caring about the house in the least. He didn’t care about the décor, the furniture, the paintings. Regulus was in trouble. Remus and Mary were in trouble. They were all in trouble, trapped in this giant house with a murderer. There was no time to fawn over how pretty the house was, so James didn’t.

He continued forward, leading the group of three as they searched for their missing two. Were Remus and Mary okay? Were they hurt? Were they… dead? James got his answer mere moments later when he spotted Remus turning the corner at full speed running towards them with fear plastered on his face.

“The murderer got Mary,” he shouted as he got closer to them. “They’re chasing me. We have to go, now.”

Just as Remus said, the killer in the Ghostface costume turned the corner right after Remus, and as soon as Remus caught up to them they were all running as fast as they could. James didn’t stop, lungs burning as his feet moved faster and faster, desperately trying to outrun the killer behind them. He could hear their footsteps behind them but didn’t dare look in case he tripped.

He was just wondering if they’d be able to outrun him, lose him in the maze of a house, when Remus gasped, falling forwards and tripping over a rug. Frank, James, and Sirius all skidded to a stop and started helping Remus up, only to see him wince when he put pressure on his foot.

“It’s sprained,” he whispered. “My ankle is sprained.”

The murderer was coming closer, so James and Sirius each took one of Remus’s arms and slung it over their shoulders, hobbling forward. James was still holding the baseball bat in his free hand, but he wouldn’t be able to swing it in this position. They were going remarkably fast considered they were basically dragging Remus, but not fast enough.

With every second the killer was gaining ground, and as James and Frank shared a look, they both knew they weren’t going to escape them. James would be damned if he just left Remus to die though, so he continued moving forward, half dragging Remus along with them.

“We’re not going to make it,” Frank said, glancing back at the killer while he ran, who was much closer than before.

“It’s not like we can do much about it,” Sirius snapped. “I’m not leaving Remus- “

“I’m not suggesting you do that,” Frank said grimly, and then stopped running.

James stopped too, staring at Frank, the boy he’d looked up to for years, and shook his head furiously. “No,” he said. “No, no. You’re not sacrificing yourself for us.”

“You won’t make it otherwise,” Frank said. “I’ll hold them off, give you more time to run.”

“Frank-“ Remus started.

Frank shook his head, his eyes darting back to the killer gaining on them. “Go, now. Go.”

Wordlessly, James handed the bat to Frank who gave James a sad smile. James had to force himself not to stay, to fight with Frank, and gave him a quick, lightning-fast hug.

With a heavy heart, James and Sirius continued running, glancing back one more time before they turned the corner to see Frank standing up straight, facing the killer with the bat raised. If he was going down, he was going down with a fight.

They turned the corner and Frank disappeared. James didn’t know if he would survive or not, didn’t know if the killer would be able to take him. He did know the feeling of grief that overtook him, all too familiar after the night he’d had.

Frank was gone.

They ran into a room a bit further onwards, one James made sure had only one exit before they barricaded it. It was an extravagant sitting room, and while James pushed everything he could in front of the door, Sirius helped Remus limp towards the couch and slowly lay down.

James refused to think about what happened. Refused to think about what Frank did for them. Instead, he focused all his efforts into barricading the door and making it fucking impossible for the murderer to enter. James was sick of his friends dying and being unable to save them.

Yet, as soon as James finished barricading the door, all the emotions he’d been supressing, trying to ignore while trapped in this horror house with a literal murderer, came rushing to him at once. He fell to his knees, feeling overwhelmed from the guilt wrapping itself around his lungs, making it hard to breathe.

James left Frank. He had just left Frank to die, defenceless except for a stupid baseball bat. He had saved his own life over Frank’s and let him throw his own life away carelessly, like it didn’t matter. It had mattered. It had mattered so much, to James, to Sirius, to everyone. Now it was gone, and Frank was probably bleeding out on the carpet as the killer searched for the rest of them.

And Peter. James couldn’t even start on him, feeling like his heart was being ripped out whenever he thought about his friend. He had promised to keep him safe, promised that he would protect him and yet Peter had died, and James hadn’t even been there to try and stop it. The guilt was everywhere, all around him, suffocating him. He should have done this, should have done that, tried to do this, possibly done that. It was all too much, and James felt like he was dying, like he shouldn’t be alive because his friends weren’t. They should be alive, not him, but he was the one standing there still breathing. Why should he live while the others died?

“James, James calm down.”

A voice. Sirius’s voice. Sirius, his best friend. One of the people he cared about the most in the entire world. Sirius, still alive.

That fact was enough to pull James back into the present, and then he was crying into Sirius’s shoulder, letting out shuddering, painful gasps as he mourned the loss of all his friends. Of his family. Sirius was there the whole time, holding him as he cried. Sirius didn’t shed a tear, but then again, Sirius didn’t normally cry, preferring to supress his emotions even in times like these. Especially in times like these.

James took deep breaths, trying to calm down. He reined in his emotions and took a few minutes to compose himself. He wouldn’t be able to think clearly when he was a mess like he was now, and it was very important that he was thinking straight.

Once he’d collected himself enough, he pulled away from Sirius’s embrace and stood up, starting to pace back and forth across the room, trying to come up with a plan. His priority was to find Regulus, but he also thought it would be a good idea to find Frank on the off chance that he was still alive. It would be good to get the bat back too.

Which meant he’d have to leave the room.

James stopped pacing and turned to Sirius and Remus, the former standing agitatedly next to the couch where the latter was laying, his leg resting on a pillow. James knew he’d have to leave them to find Regulus and Frank, and he knew they wouldn’t be happy about it.

 “I need to go,” James said.

Instantly Sirius was staring at him, eyes blazing in anger as his hands curled into fists. “Are you crazy? You are not going out there.”

“I need to, Sirius,” James said desperately. “I need to find Regulus, and I need to see if Frank is still alive. If he is, we need to get him to safety. Can’t you see we need to do this, Sirius? That I need to do this?”

Sirius snarled. “I won’t let you go out there and risk your fucking life for someone whose already dead and someone who would rather be dead than be with me. Frank is dead, and Regulus isn’t worth it.”

James flinched at his words. “Don’t say that Sirius. Regulus is worth it. Anyone who is stuck in this house is worth it. I know you’re scared, but I need to go, and you need to stay here and protect Moony.”

“James…” Remus said helplessly. “Please don’t do this.”

James stared pleadingly at both of them, begging them to understand. “I have to.”

Sirius stared at him, into his eyes, into his soul, and then looked away, a pained expression on his face. It was then that James knew he had won, so he silently turned around and started moving back all of the furniture he had pushed against the door.

When James finished unbarricading the door, he just stared at it, willing himself to open to the door and leave. The problem was he was scared. He was terrified and wanted nothing more than to stay in there with the rest of them until help came, but he knew he couldn’t. He needed to be strong and find Regulus. He needed to save them all.

He turned around and launched himself at Sirius, wrapping his arms around him in a tight hug. Sirius returned it just as tightly and James whispered into his ear.

“I love you Sirius.”

A whimper escaped Sirius and he held on tighter. James started to worry that Sirius might just never let go when all of a sudden Sirius was on the other side of the room, staring determinedly at the wall with his hands clenched.

James looked at Remus and smiled at him, mouthing the words I love you to him as well, and then he was gone, walking out the door before he could change his mind.

Being outside the room was scary. He’d left the safety of his friends, of the barricaded room, and was walking through the halls of a mansion without a weapon while a serial killer was on the loose. He wasn’t going to back down, though. He wasn’t going to run back into the room and hide away, because Regulus needed him, and he’d do anything for Regulus.

He retraced his steps to where they left Frank, feeling his anxiety climb higher with every step. What if the killer was waiting for James? What if they were leering over Frank’s body, waiting for James to come back for him so they could finish him off?

James took a deep breath and turned the corner.

He felt sick to his stomach at the sight before him. Frank, on the ground, his head smashed in as blood poured from the wound, one of his arms bent at an awkward angle. The baseball bat was on the floor next to him, blood covering the edge of it. James ran towards him and kneeled down next to Frank’s body, trying not to look at the brain matter seeping out of his head.

He checked his pulse, but there was nothing there. Frank was dead. Killed with his own weapon. It was sick, and James wanted nothing to do with the bat that killed Frank, yet he knew he needed to take it, if only to have a weapon while hunting down Regulus.

Gingerly, James picked up the bat, grimacing at the sight of the blood splattered across it. He wiped it off on his shirt, took one last look at Frank, all mangled and broken, and continued on. He needed to find Regulus and he needed to get out of there.

James knew Regulus was still there. He’d been looking for James when the house got locked, and James knew that Regulus wouldn’t leave without finding James, just like James wasn’t going to leave until he found Regulus. He wondered where Regulus was now, if he was okay, or if he was…

No. James refused to think that Regulus was anything other than okay, not until he found Regulus himself. Regulus was unharmed, and James would find him unharmed, and he would keep him unharmed. Everything would be fine once James found Regulus.

Regulus was okay.

Regulus was okay.

Regulus was okay.

James repeated the mantra to himself as he walked and searched, unable to bear the thought of anything else. He continued searching for him, looking in every room he came across, searching through every wardrobe or cupboard in case he was hiding in there.

James entered another bedroom. It was plain, with a neatly made bed, clean desk and unused wardrobe. There were no identifying features for who lived there, so James assumed it was yet another guest bedroom. This house had many of them.

James was about to turn around and leave when he saw something move in the corner of his eye. A shadow behind him, entering the room. James swallowed, feeling his grip tighten on the bat as the shadow moved closer.

James swerved around, bat ready to swing, only to nearly drop it when he saw the person standing in front of him.

Regulus. It was Regulus.

Regulus was there. Standing in front of James. Smiling.

All of a sudden James was moving, wrapping his arms around Regulus as he pulled him close, breathing in the sweet smell of him. His heart was hammering in his chest as he held onto Regulus like his life depended on it.

Regulus was there. Regulus was alive. Regulus was right there standing in his arms.

James let out a shaky breath, feeling dangerously close to tears as his hands ran the length of Regulus’s back, checking for any wounds. When he didn’t find any he pulled back and checked Regulus’s front, arms, legs, face, until he was certain that Regulus was fine.

Then he was back to hugging Regulus, feeling safe in his arms. He’d been so scared that something had gone wrong, that Regulus had been hurt. James wasn’t sure what he would have done if he’d found Regulus dead. Probably cry.

James pulled back once again, an almost amused smile on Regulus’s face at James’s actions. James cupped Regulus’s face, brushing his thumb over Regulus’s cheek as he leaned in and pressed a kiss against Regulus’s lips. It was sweet, like him, and James got lost in it, in the feeling of Regulus’s mouth against his, his lips moving against James’s in sync like they were supposed to.

They broke apart, and for the first time since this nightmare began, James smiled. It was small, but it was there, and it was for Regulus. James loved him so much. He was so grateful that he was fine, and in his arms, and looking at him with love in his eyes.

“You’re okay,” James exhaled, closing his eyes as he pressed Regulus’s forehead against his.

“I’m okay,” Regulus responded. “And you are too.”

James nodded, relishing in the feeling of having Regulus in his arms, safe and sound. He’d keep him there forever if he could, right by James’s side where he belonged. James was sure Regulus wouldn’t mind if he did.

Again James couldn’t help but hug Regulus again, burying his head into the crook of Regulus’s neck as he escaped to his happy place, right next to Regulus. He sighed, content, and forgot about murders and dead friends and everything else that had been plaguing him. He just felt Regulus, and it was incredible.

James cracked his eyes open, intending to look Regulus in the eye and tell him how much he loved him, when he spotted something in Regulus’s back jean pocket. James hadn’t checked his ass for wounds, too busy being relieved Regulus was okay to take the chance to make any risky moves. So he didn’t see the glint of silver poking out of Regulus’s pocket, or the specks of dried blood on it.

No. No, no, no.

He just got Regulus back. He just got him back. This shouldn’t be happening. This can’t be happening. James doesn’t deserve it. He just went through all this effort to save Regulus, so this was not fucking happening, and whatever James thought that knife meant, there was a perfectly reasonable explanation for it that didn’t involve what James thought it involved.

Even so, James found himself untangling from Regulus and then taking a step back, then another. He stared at Regulus, at the grey eyes he knew so well, and thought, Regulus can’t be the murderer. He’s my boyfriend. My lover. The person who I cherish and protect and love. He can’t be the killer.

“Regulus?” James asked quietly. Hesitantly.

Regulus sighed, taking out the knife in his back pocket and twirling it around in his fingers, his eyes trailing its every move. His gaze flicked up to James, and a small smile appeared on his face as he continued twirling the knife.

“It’s me, James,” he said. “I’m the murderer. I’m the killer. I killed all those people.”

James stared at Regulus, at the love of his life, and shook his head. He was lying. He had to be lying. James wasn’t willing to believe anything else. He loved Regulus, for god’s sake. He refused to believe this horrible thing about him, refused to believe that Regulus was capable of murder. Of murdering his friends.

“I knew you wouldn’t believe it,” Regulus sighed, tucking the knife into the front pocket of his jeans so James could still see it. “I knew you’d be in denial, but it’s true. I killed them all, and I did it for you.”

James didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know what to think. He didn’t want to believe that Regulus was the killer, yet he kept staring at the knife, and then the black gloves on Regulus’s hands he hadn’t noticed earlier. The same ones the killer had been wearing.

How could Regulus be the murderer? Why would he be the murderer? It didn’t make any sense. James loved Regulus so much, thought the whole world of him, so why would he do this? Why would he do this and break James’s heart? James had trusted him. Had trusted him with his whole life. If Regulus had asked him to jump off a cliff he would have, because he knew that Regulus would never harm him. He would have done anything for Regulus, and Regulus repaid him by slaughtering all his friends. Why?

James was sickened. The love of his life murdered people. He was sickened with Regulus, and he was sickened with himself, because he still loved Regulus. In some twisted way, for some warped reason, James still loved Regulus. He could still feel the love within him like a second heartbeat. Could still feel the fondness and protectiveness he always had. Why, though? Regulus had killed his friends, yet James was still longing to hold him again. What was wrong with James? What was wrong with Regulus? What was wrong with them both?

“How could any of this be for me?” James eventually managed to ask.

“For us,” Regulus said softly, taking a step towards James. “So we can be together without having to hide. I love you, James. I want to be with you constantly, to be able to love you without worry, yet there are all these people stopping us from doing that. Stopping us from loving each other like we should be able to. So I got rid of them. For you. For us.”

James let out a choked sob, shaking his head before Regulus even finished speaking. This wasn’t right. It couldn’t be right. Not when so many of the people he loved were dead. Not when Regulus was standing in front of him, bloody knife in his pocket, explaining that he killed all these people for them. So they could be together without having to hide.

James felt guilty. So, so guilty. If he’d had the guts to tell Sirius about Regulus, to date him in public and not keep their relationship a secret, this wouldn’t be happening. He was the reason this was happening, because he treated his relationship with Regulus like something dirty when it was something beautiful. Something exquisite and unique. It should have never been hidden, and James felt the shame hit him hard.

This was all his fault.

He was too stunned to speak. To shocked to move. To ashamed to run away. Regulus took another step forward, and instead of feeling fear or disgust like he should, he just felt longing. He wanted to be in Regulus’s arms. He wanted to kiss him and make everything feel better. He wanted him, even after everything.

“I was stopping us,” James croaked. “Not everyone else. I was the reason our relationship was hidden.”

Regulus gave James a small smile, shaking his head. “You were just scared James, and that’s okay. I did this so you wouldn’t have to be scared. I got rid of the things to be scared about.”

He took another step forward, and another, until they were face to face, close enough to touch. Regulus tried to do just that, his hand brushing James’s wrist.

James flinched.

He loved Regulus. His body longed for Regulus, even now. Yet he was scared. Not of Regulus, but of himself. He didn’t know what he was feeling, what he should do, and he was scared he would do something wrong if Regulus touched him, if he loved him. James didn’t want to do something wrong.

He saw the hurt flash in Regulus’s eyes, saw the way his hand hesitated, like it used to in the beginning of their relationship, saw the way his heart seemed to break, and all James longed for was to fix it.

“What happened to loving me no matter what?” Regulus whispered. James was at a loss for words, so Regulus continued. “You’re breaking all your promises today, aren’t you? First Peter and now me.”

James felt guilty about his reaction, wondering if maybe he should have leant into Regulus’s touch instead of recoiling from it. Wondering if he should kiss Regulus instead of running away. Wondering if he should forgive him, because Regulus did it all for them, after all.

Yet he couldn’t get Frank out of his mind. Or Peter. Or Lily. Or Marlene and Dorcas.

“Why did you kill Marlene and Dorcas?” James asked. “I thought Dorcas was your friend.”

Regulus blinked, and then sighed, staring at the floor. “They had what we couldn’t. Didn’t you see that? They were together, even though they belonged to different groups, different friends. Why were they allowed to be together, but we weren’t? It’s not fair, James.”

“I know,” James said quietly. “But is this fair? Killing all these people?”

“It’s making things fair for us,” Regulus insisted.

James shook his head and squeezed his eyes shut, balling his hands into fists and resting them against his face. He was so confused. There were thousands of feelings inside him, thousands of thoughts swirling inside his head. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know, he didn’t know, he didn’t know.

“James,” Regulus said. “James look at me.”

James did as Regulus asked, unable to resist looking at his face. He froze when he did, though, because Regulus’s face wasn’t comforting like he thought it would be. It was stone cold, similar to what he was like when he was upset, except so much worse.

“Where’s Sirius, James?”

James stared at Regulus, at the love of his life, and slowly shook his head. He wasn’t going to answer that question. Regulus’s face softened and he moved his hand to cup James’s cheek. James didn’t flinch this time.

“James, you need to trust me,” Regulus said.

James stared at Regulus. “You just killed all these people, though. How do I trust you?”

“Please, James,” Regulus pleaded. “I just want to see my brother.”

Something broke inside James, to see Regulus like that, begging to get at least glimpse of his brother. James hadn’t realised they still loved each other, but now it was so obvious they did. Not only because of what Regulus just said, but because of Sirius. He’d stayed with James without complaint, also looking for Regulus. If he had only been there for James, not Regulus, there would have been a lot more complaining, but there was none because Sirius wanted to be there for Regulus as well. Sirius still loved Regulus, and Regulus still loved Sirius. That would have made James happy if not for the knife in Regulus’s pocket.

“I don’t think I should,” James said slowly, “but maybe, maybe we can fix this somehow. Maybe if I talk to Sirius we can- “

“James,” Regulus said, cutting James off. He was back to the stone-cold expression, and the hand on James’s face suddenly felt cold. “Tell me where Sirius is.”

James shook his head again. “No.”

“Tell me where he is, or when I eventually find him, I will kill both him and Remus. Slowly.”

James was shocked. He’d never seen this side of Regulus before. To threaten to kill people, his own brother, with no emotion… it was scary. Regulus’s face softened at the fear on James’s expression, and he moved his hand to softly stroke James’s hair.

“You’ll understand eventually,” he whispered. “I love you. Now show me where Sirius is.” Regulus moved away from James and gestured him to the lead the way.

To lead the way. To Sirius and Remus.

James knew he had no choice but to take Regulus to Sirius and Remus. This way they might not die, but if he didn’t do what Regulus asked, he knew he’d be leading Remus and Sirius to their deaths. James swallowed and started walking, hearing the soft footsteps of Regulus behind him as he hoped and begged and prayed that Regulus wouldn’t kill his friends.

Sirius was his brother. He wouldn’t kill his own brother, right?

James led Regulus down the hallways, the bat still in his hand yet absolutely useless in this situation, following the path he memorised in his mind. He was scared. For Remus and Sirius. For Regulus. Funnily enough, he held no fear for himself. He knew the other people in this house meant more to him that he did, and he knew he would protect any of them over protecting himself. The thought didn’t scare him as much as he thought it would.

“Please don’t hurt Remus or Sirius,” James begged once again as he got closer to the end destination.

Regulus gave him a smile, brushing their hands. James wondered why, even after everything Regulus had done, James still loved the feeling of their hands touching. He didn’t understand why he still wanted Regulus, why his body longed to be with Regulus’s, but it did. What was wrong with him? Shouldn’t James be throwing things, trying to kill Regulus himself with the bat in his hand for what Regulus did to all of James’s friends? Why was James still fawning over Regulus, still wanting to protect him and love him? What did it mean? Was James does mentally ill? Or was what Regulus did excusable? Was he feeling like this because deep inside him he knew that he would never fall out of love with Regulus, and he would eventually forgive him for this?

“You’ll understand everything soon enough,” Regulus said.

That wasn’t exactly comforting, and James continued on with a heavy heart, wondering if he was leading Sirius and Remus to their deaths. Or Regulus to his. Both thoughts were equally discomforting, and James tried to think about something else, but his mind kept straying to his current problems.

It felt like he was choosing who would live and who would die. Remus and Sirius or Regulus. Who should he choose? What should he do? Which lives should he take? It was confusing, and James was terrified of making the wrong decision, of choosing the wrong thing. He didn’t want to choose between the people he loved most. Why couldn’t they all survive this together?

James’s breath hitched when he turned the corner and spotted Frank’s body on the floor. He wanted to look at Regulus, to show him what he’d done and ask how he could possibly be okay with that, and yet at the same time he was terrified of what he’d find. He didn’t want Regulus to be a monster. He didn’t want his idea of Regulus to change, to become even worse, so he walked forward, not looking at Regulus or the body. He just continued walking until they arrived at the door to the room Sirius and Remus were inside.

“They’re in here,” James murmured, his throat dry.

Regulus looked at the door. “Why don’t you knock?”

James really didn’t want to knock, but he knew he didn’t have much of a choice, so he did. After a moment of silence he turned the doorknob and entered the room, finding Sirius standing with his fists raised and Remus balancing precariously on one foot, tensed up.

As soon as they saw James both of their shoulders sagged, relief washing their faces. When Sirius spotted Regulus, he stiffened, yet he seemed even more relieved than earlier. James knew that his realisation had been right; Sirius did still love Regulus.

Sirius smiled, moving forward to embrace James, but then he noticed James’s tense posture and wide eyes. He stared between James and Regulus and took a step back, angling closer to Remus.

“What’s wrong?” he asked.

Regulus moved forward, pushing James behind him and giving him a warning look. Whatever happened next, Regulus was telling James not to intervene, and that was terrifying. Could James stand there and let Regulus kill his friends? No. Did he have a choice? Also no.

Sirius and Remus’s eyes were trained on Regulus, both of them widening in realisation when Regulus took the knife out of his pocket and twirled it around in his fingers. Sirius took a step back, nearly stumbling, while Remus stayed very still, staring at the knife like if he looked away he’d find it in his stomach.

James watched as emotion after emotion passed over Sirius’s face as he processed what he was seeing. That his brother was a murderer. There was shock and disbelief, which moved into sadness and grief, which finally ended up as anger. A dangerous, suffocating anger that blazed in his eyes as he stared at Regulus.

“Why did you do it?” he asked, voice rough.

Regulus, instead of answering, walked slowly towards Sirius. James tensed even more, fingers itching to do something, but he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. Tackle Regulus to the floor? Stand in front of Sirius to protect him from harm? Or grab Remus and Sirius and get the fuck out of there? He didn’t know, and he could feel panic bubbling just below the surface, threatening to overwhelm him. He pushed it down.

James watched Regulus walked slowly towards Sirius, getting ready to jump in front of him, only to be caught off guard when Regulus turned at the last minute and grabbed Remus. Sirius and James both lunged towards him but then Regulus had his knife at Remus’s throat and was yelling at them to step back.

They both did, staring at the silver blade pressed against Remus’s neck. James was terrified. Truly, deeply, terrified. That wasn’t how he was supposed to feel. Regulus Black, the love of his life, should not be making him feel like that. He shouldn’t be making James panic and wonder if he was going to kill his friends.

Regulus was staring intently at the knife he had pressed against Remus’s throat, as Remus let out a gasp, also staring at the knife. Sirius was looking like he wanted to murder Regulus himself, which James sincerely hoped he wouldn’t because having two people he loved becoming murderers would only confuse him even more.

Regulus looked at James, then Sirius, then back at his knife as he spoke. “I killed all these people for James and me. So that we could be together freely, and not have to hide.”

Sirius frowned, looking at Regulus to James in confusion. “What? What does he mean? James?”

James couldn’t bear to look at him, instead staring determinedly at the floor. He felt shame creep up on him, a horrible feeling for a horrible thing. He shouldn’t feel ashamed for loving Regulus, at least, before he became a murderer. Yet seeing Sirius’s accusing gaze, the betrayal in his tone, was almost too much for James to bear. He hated it. He really, really hated it.

“You’re dating my brother?” James still didn’t look up. “James, look at me.”

Reluctantly, James brought his gaze up from the floor and onto Sirius’s face. A face so full of betrayal and confusion. A face that James loved dearly and never meant to hurt. A face that may never look at James the same way again.

“Yes,” he admitted. There was no point in hiding it now. “I’m dating him. I’ve been dating him for the past year.” Sirius looked horrified and James hurriedly continued talking, desperate to get Sirius to understand. “I love him, Sirius. I love him so much.”

That was the wrong thing to say. Rage flickered behind Sirius’s eyes, a dark, hateful feeling that James could practically feel. He could feel Sirius’s anger, just like Sirius could feel his desperation. They were connected, their hearts beat in sync, they were soulmates. They were breaking each other’s hearts.

“You love him? You still love him? You love this thing? This monster that he’s become? You don’t care that he murdered our fucking friends? You don’t care that he’s crazy? Psychotic?”

James’s eyes were wide. “That’s not what I meant- “

“You don’t fucking care that he’s got my boyfriend at knife point?” Sirius yelled, jerking his head in Remus’s direction. “That at any moment he could slit his throat and kill him?”

James stared at Sirius, feeling his heart break with every harsh word that came out of Sirius’s mouth. James loved him; he hated hearing his best friend, his brother, verbally tear him to shreds. He hated the disgust in Sirius’s voice when he talked about James’s feelings for Regulus. He hated that Sirius would have never accepted James and Regulus’s relationship, not even if Regulus had never murdered anyone.

“This is why we had to hide,” Regulus continued, grabbing everyone’s attention, “because of you. Because of how you’d react. You stopped us from being completely happy. You stopped us from being able to properly love one another without the fear that we’d be found out. We loved each other in secret because of you. We had to hide it. Why should you have the person you love, when I’m not allowed to have the person I love? Why should you be able to flaunt your romance around the school while James and I are forced to sneak around you, in constant fear of what you’d do if you found out. Why do you get to have Remus, but I’m not allowed to have James? Doesn’t seem very fair, does it?”

James realised too late what was going to happen. He surged forward, almost at the exact same time as Sirius, but they were too late. In one smooth motion Regulus moved his hand and a line of blood appeared on Remus’s neck, growing bigger and bigger as every second passed. Regulus stepped back as Remus fell to his knees, hands going to his throat that was now gushing blood. He looked up at Sirius who had tears in his eyes, staring at his boyfriend that was dying right in front of him. Remus tried to say something to Sirius but ended up choking on his blood, only quickening the process of his death. Everyone knew what he tried to say, though.

I love you.

Sirius fell to his knees, a broken cry in his throat. He crawled towards Remus, desperate to make sure he as okay, that this was all an act and Remus would wake up and say “surprise!” and everything would be fine. He stared at his lover through his tears, shaking and trembling because the love of his life was gone. Dead. He’d never be able to see him again. Remus was dead.

He was gasping, hands clutching his chest as he tried to suppress the onslaught of emotions he was feeling. James could feel it. Every shard of glass stabbing into his heart. Every feeling of panic emerging, making it hard to breathe. The suffocating blanket of grief that was thrown over them, threatening to smother them completely. James felt it all, because he mourned too. He mourned one of his best friends. Another fellow Marauder. His best friend’s lover. He mourned so much, it felt like that was all he knew how to do. Like his whole purpose on this earth was just to grieve the loss of every friend he’d had, of every person he couldn’t save.

Remus was dead.

James had dropped the bat at some point in all of this. He wasn’t sure when though. He couldn’t remember, and he couldn’t care less. Remus was dead. No one cared about a stupid bat. James looked at Regulus, the boy staring down at Sirius as his brother gently cradled Remus’s body in his arms. How could Regulus have done this? How could Regulus, the love of James’s life, kill one of his best friends? He couldn’t. This wasn’t happening. It wasn’t real. Remus was still alive, and Sirius wasn’t crying over his dead body. Regulus wasn’t a murderer and James wasn’t having trouble processing everything that just happened because nothing had happened. Everything was fine. Everything was fine. Everything was fine-

Everything was not fine.

James couldn’t outrun this. He couldn’t pretend that everything was fine, not when nothing was. All his friends were dead, all except for Sirius who most likely hated James for dating and falling in love with his brother. Regulus in question was a serial killer who had killed all of James’s friends so that they could be free to love each other without being afraid. He had killed for James, and it was James’s fault. Everything was James’s fault, and if he had just done things differently none of this would be happening.

Panic was clawing at James’s throat. He felt like he was going to pass out. His hands were clammy, and his breaths were quick and short. He didn’t want to believe any of this was happening, but it was. He needed to accept the truth, so he could figure out what to do next, but he was at a loss of what to even think, let alone do. What if Regulus killed Sirius? What if Sirius killed Regulus? What would James do? Who would he side with? Who would he save? Questions upon questions bubbled up inside him, but he had no answers. He had no idea what he’d do, what he was supposed to be doing right now, which was probably why he was just standing there doing nothing. Not even crying.

Should he be crying? Sirius was crying. Sirius had been in love with Remus. James had loved Remus too. Sirius was holding Remus’s body and begging him to come back to him, to open up his eyes and be okay. James knew that Remus would never open up his eyes again. James wasn’t sure why he wasn’t crying. He should be crying.

Instead he was staring at Regulus, at how lovely he looked, even covered in blood. He was looking at Regulus and thinking about how despicable he was because he was still in love with him. Even after he murdered Remus, one of the people James loved most in the entire world, James still loved Regulus. Would James love Regulus no matter what he did or who he killed? Possibly. It was possible. Anything was possible. Not Remus waking up though, so Sirius should really stop trying. It wasn’t going to work. Nothing would work.

Sirius didn’t seem to realise that and kept begging Remus to open his eyes again, begging and begging and begging for nothing. Remus was dead. He looked towards James desperately, pleading for him to help but James just stood there. He couldn’t help Remus anymore than Sirius could. He was dead, and they needed to accept that if they wanted to continue living. The problem was, watching Sirius sob over Remus’s body, James wasn’t sure Sirius wanted to continue. He wasn’t sure that Sirius could see the light in life anymore, now that Remus was gone, because Remus had been his light. His moon.

Now he was just a corpse.                                                                         

James looked to his best friend, the boy who had been through so much, crying over his lover’s body. As if he could sense his gaze, Sirius turned to look at James, their gazes connecting as the world seemed to righten ever so slightly. Everything was horrible, people they loved were dead, but they still had each other. They would always have each other because they were soulmates. They understood each other in a way no one did, connecting on a level that no one else could get on. They would get through this together. Whatever this was.

Sirius’s eyes flicked from James to Regulus, then James again. James stood there, staring at Sirius and trying to figure out what he meant. They had never struggled to understand each other before, yet as they stood there, Sirius’s pleading gaze on James, he couldn’t figure out for the life of him what Sirius meant. Sirius did it again, glancing from James to Regulus, James to Regulus, James to Regulus-

Oh.

Oh.

James understood. He realised what Sirius meant, what he was planning, and James’s eyes widened. He glanced at Regulus as thoughts whirred around in his mind, unsure what action to make. Sirius wanted to overpower Regulus, to take him down and end this once and for all. Regulus wanted James to stay by his side, to understand and appreciate why he was killing all these people. James wanted… James had no idea what he wanted. He wanted this to have never happened. He wanted Remus to be okay and Regulus to be sane and Sirius to not be begging James to help him overtake the love of James’s life.

James was scared. He was so scared. He didn’t know what to do. He knew he should, knew the choice should be easy, yet as he stared at Regulus he couldn’t supress the love he felt for him. Regulus was his one true love, the person he was supposed to grow old with. They were fated to meet in every universe, every version of themselves. James knew it in his heart that they were always meant to be together, no matter what. Yet would James really be able to do nothing as Regulus killed all his friends one by one? Would he be able to stand there and accept his actions as he slaughtered the people James loved most in the world?

Would he be able to stand there and let Regulus kill Sirius, if it came to it? Sirius, who seemed to hate James at the moment yet was begging for his help. Sirius, who James had helped in his darkest times, who he had always been there for, who had just watched his boyfriend get murdered in front of him.

The answer was no. Of course it was. It would always be no. James loved Regulus, but he also loved Sirius and he couldn’t stand the idea of one of them killing the other. He looked at Sirius and nodded slowly, showing that he was in on the plan.

They wouldn’t kill Regulus. James wouldn’t allow it. Instead, the plan was to subdue him. Two against one. James and Sirius were both strong and fit, while Regulus was lankier. They would be able to overpower him, and then they’d make sure he stayed down while they called the cops and-

And Regulus would go to jail.

No, they’d figure everything out after they got the weapon out of Regulus’s hand, after they could finally think clearly now that all danger was gone. They’d come up with a solution and everything would be fine. First they just had to subdue Regulus. Overpower him and get rid of his weapon, making him defenceless.

Sirius and James looked at each other, an understanding going between them. They both knew they would not be killing Regulus. Sirius glanced at Regulus, then back at James and started counting, mouthing the words so only James could see them.

Three…

Two...

One

James and Sirius ran at Regulus at the same time, intending to use both their strength to overpower Regulus. James felt sure it would work as he launched himself at his boyfriend. He tried to ignore the surprise in Regulus’s eyes, and then the betrayal shining through. James was doing this for them, so Regulus didn’t make any more mistakes that he would regret.

Except Sirius had been faster than James and instead of working together had pushed James out the way, tackling Regulus to the ground himself. James surged forward, seeing his mistake, but it was too late. There was a sickening squelching sound and then Sirius let out a gasp. Regulus shoved him off him and shuffled back, staring at Sirius with wide eyes. And without a knife.

James, feeling like he was going to throw up, slowly turned his head to look at Sirius, feeling his whole world crash down when he saw the knife in Sirius’s chest. Exactly where his heart was. He stared at his best friend, his brother, his soulmate, as his heartbeat slowed. He watched as Sirius looked at James and managed a shaky smile before he collapsed on top of Remus’s body. He watched as Sirius seemed to curl into Remus’s lifeless side and relax, finally back where he belonged.

James watched, and he felt the world shake and turn and spin when, suddenly, their hearts no longer beat in sync.

James wasn’t okay.

How could he be okay, when his best friend was dead. His best friend, who in his last moments of life had hated James for loving Regulus. His best friend who he hadn’t been able to make up with before it was all over. His best friend who he had loved with his whole heart, now lying dead on the floor next to his lover.

The world seemed bleak; all the colour drained out of it now that Sirius was dead. James knew that he’d died hating James, even if he had smiled at him in his last moments. James knew that in his act of loving Regulus, he had broken Sirius’s heart. He hated himself, and a small part of him hated Sirius. For dying. For leaving him here. For hating him for loving Regulus. For making them hide when they shouldn’t have.

Mostly he hated himself though. He felt like he was drowning in self-disgust, hating the very skin on his bones. How could he do this? Everything that had led up to this moment, every action made and word spoken, it was all James’s fault. He knew this, yet the sheer capacity of it all felt too much for James. He made this happen. He’s the reason all these people were dead. If it wasn’t for him they would still be breathing. Still be happy. James ruined it all.

Lily. Marlene. Dorcas. Peter. Mary. Frank. Remus. Sirius.

It was all James’s fault, and he wasn’t sure what to do. He wasn’t sure what he could do, how he could move on from this. Regulus, some part of his mind spoke. You can move on with Regulus. Regulus, the boy he was in love with. Regulus, whose smile made James’s heart feel like it was soaring. Regulus, who had just killed James’s best friend.

He managed to tear his eyes away from Sirius to find Regulus standing by the door, eyes fixed on Sirius’s lifeless body. His fingers were twitching, something he did when he was feeling a strong sense of emotion. James wondered what exactly he was feeling, what was going through his mind at that time, if he felt as guilty for Sirius’s death as James did.

James looked at his face, at the colour drained from his face. At his wide eyes and trembling lip. At the way his jaw clenched like he was trying not to cry. Yes, Regulus felt guilty. Yes, Regulus had loved Sirius. James wondered if Regulus blamed James. James certainly blamed himself, so he wasn’t about to complain if Regulus blamed him, too. He wasn’t going to complain if Regulus ripped the knife out of Sirius’s heart and stabbed James’s. If anything, James would have been relieved, to finally leave this mess of a place, and for Regulus to be the last thing he saw before he drifted off into oblivion. He wondered if he’d see Remus and Sirius there. He hoped so.

As he stared at Regulus, Regulus turned his gaze to James. James froze, waiting for the moment anger would replace Regulus’s features, waiting for the moment he’d feel a knife piercing his chest and then everything would be over. Regulus didn’t do that, though, no matter how much James longed him to, because he loved James. He loved James and would never hurt him and could never imagine being the end of him.

He loved Sirius too. That was an accident. He stabbed him. He didn’t mean too. Sirius is dead because of him. It wasn’t his fault, it was yours. James couldn’t argue with that. It was true. It was his fault. It was James’s fault.

It was always James’s fault.

Regulus stared at James and his face crumpled. Tears started rolling down his face as he took in huge, shuddering breathes, staring at James and then the body of the brother that he killed. His hands shook as he clenched them into fists, trying and failing to gain a hand on his emotions.

“Why did you do that James?” he whispered, voice cracking. “I didn’t want to do that, James. I didn’t want to do that. Why did you make me do that? I didn’t want to do that, James. James.”

James wanted to help him. He desperately wanted to help him, to wrap him in a hug and shield him from the horrors of this world. He wanted to make Regulus happy again, to see the brightness of his smile and smile with him. He wanted to be able to grow old with Regulus and create and family. He wanted to get married to him and get a cat together. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with him, yet at the same time he couldn’t stand the thought of spending one more second in the same room as him.

He killed Sirius. He killed James’s best friend. He didn’t mean too. He killed everyone else. So we didn’t have to hide. Weren’t you tired of hiding? …yes. He was so, so tired of hiding, but Regulus had killed people. He didn’t have to kill people to make them stop hiding. It worked though. You’re freeto be together out in the open. Without my best friend though… Regulus is mourning him too.

James didn’t know what to think. Two sides of him were fighting each other, the two most important parts of him. His love for Sirius and his love for Regulus. He didn’t know who to side with, who he should love and who he should hate. He loved them both; he didn’t want to hate either of them. He had to make a decision though, didn’t he? What he was supposed to do. Comfort Regulus or make sure he gets arrested. Mourn Sirius or relish in the freedom of being able to love Regulus out in the open.

He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t know, he didn’t know, he didn’t know-

A flash of movement caught his eye. James watched, as if in slow motion, as Mary ran behind Regulus, limping slightly with a kitchen knife in hand. James’s eyes widened, but like always he was too slow and before he had even moved an inch Mary had embedded the knife into Regulus’s back.

James saw Regulus’s eyes widened, saw the shock in his expression before he stumbled to his knees, toppling over and lying on the floor as he slowly bled out, the knife still inside him. James ears were ringing as he stared at Regulus.

Regulus. His love. Dying on the floor with a knife in his back. Regulus, the boy he would protect forever, slowly losing his life. Regulus, the only person who would be able to make James smile after all this, lying on the floor with his eyes closed, accepting death.

Nothing was making sense. James couldn’t think. There was too much noise, too many feelings, James couldn’t make sense of any of it. He tried focusing on one thought, one feeling, but they all escaped him. Then the voice was back.

You still had Regulus. Even when everyone else had died, even when you had felt so alone, you still had Regulus. Now he’s dying. Now you’ll have no one.

And she killed him.

The ringing in his ears grew louder as his gaze fell on Mary, panting slightly as she stared at Regulus’s body with something like vindication on her face. James felt the anger. He felt the hopelessness, the fear, and the anger. Oh he was rageful. He felt like a thousand fires had lit inside him. He felt like he was going to explode as his fury grew and grew and grew.

Who was this girl, thinking she could take away the love of his life without consequence? He had loved Regulus, and she had killed him. She had taken away the one good thing left in his life because she was a selfish, selfish creature that deserved to be punished.

James was going to punish her.

He picked up the bat at his feet, never taking his eyes off of Mary, who was still too busy celebrating over Regulus’s death to look at him. When James starting walking towards her, though, she looked up at him and smiled. She smiled at him like Regulus dying was something good, like James should be relieved and happy with her.

James was not happy.

Mary’s smile fell when she spotted the bat in James’s hand, the blank expression on his face as he strode towards her. She tried to run. James didn’t let her. He ran after her, gaining on her quickly and raised the bat before swinging down as hard as he could on Mary’s legs. She let out a cry of pain and stumbled to the floor, hands going to her broken leg. She looked up at James, tears streaming down her face.

“James, please. Please don’t hurt- “

James didn’t let her finish.

He raised the bat and swung down, again and again and again. He screamed and cried and swung. He threw curses at her as he mutated her body. He didn’t care when the blood sprayed on him, didn’t care when Mary was dead. He just kept swinging, getting rid of every rotten emotion inside of him.

Regulus was dead, and it was her fault.

James panted, finally dropping the bat when he felt like his arm was going to fall off. He wasn’t sure how much time had passed. It felt like hours. It was probably only minutes. James blinked, then blinked again, trying to figure out where he was. What was happening? Why was he here? Where was Regulus?

Regulus.

Everything came back at once, hitting him like a kick to the stomach. He stumbled back, looking at the broken mess he’d made of Mary’s body. What had he done? What had he done? He’d killed her. He’d killed Mary.

For Regulus.

James turned around, unable to look at what he’d done. Instead, his eyes landed on Regulus, and he ran for him, kneeling down beside his body. He let out a sob and grabbed Regulus’s hand, feeling his heart fracture into a million pieces. Regulus was dead. His Regulus, that he loved more than the sun itself. His Regulus, that he’d had so many plans for the future with. His Regulus, the only person capable of making him feel so in love he’d do anything for him.

It wasn’t fair. None of it was fair. Regulus shouldn’t be dead. He should be laughing, head in James’s lap as they watched the sun set together. They should be in James’s room, cuddling on the couch while watching a scary movie. They should be under the sheets of James’s bed, whispering secrets and murmuring love confessions to one another in the dark night. Their bodies should be lying next to each other, safe from the horrors of the real world.

James wanted to cry. He wanted to scream. He wanted to take the knife and end himself, because what is a world if it doesn’t have Regulus Black in it? He wanted to kill himself and find Regulus in the afterlife. Kiss him and hug him and protect him. He wanted to escape the overwhelming grief currently smothering him. He wanted, he wanted, he wanted.

The hand holding his squeezed.

James’s eyes snapped towards Regulus and found the boy’s eyes cracked open, staring at James with bleary eyes. James felt like his heart was soaring. He felt like he was flying, like nothing could ever pull him down because Regulus was alive, Regulus was okay. They’d be fine. They had each other. They’d be okay.

Except Regulus had lost a lot of blood, and even if he wasn’t dead yet, he was still dying. He needed medical attention immediately, but James had no way to give it to him. They were still locked in the house, and none of their phones had service-

James started patting Regulus’s pockets, hoping against hope that his theory was right, that he wasn’t grasping at straws, that he’d be able to save Regulus. James let out a whimper of relief when he pulled out a burner phone from Regulus’s pocket, one that had service.

Immediately he dialled 999 and waited breathlessly for the line to be accepted. He needed Regulus to survive. He needed him to. There was no point in life if Regulus wasn’t in it. James had to protect him. He had to save him.

“999, what is your emergency?”

James let out sob, so thankful to hear that other person’s voice. Things would be okay; they would all be okay.

“Hi, um, my friend- my friend is hurt. There was a murderer, and my friend was stabbed. He’s lost a lot of blood,” James stammered, unsure what to say now he was on the call.

It was time for him to make his choice. James knew that now. He still hadn’t decided what to choose, though.

“Are you safe right now?” the person asked. “Is the murderer still in the building?” James was at a loss for words. “Do you know who the murderer is?”

James stared at Regulus, at the boy he loved with his whole heart. He stared at him, and the only thing coming to his mind was:

I love you, Regulus. I’ll always love you, no matter what. I promise.

I promise.

“Sir, are you there? Sir?”

“Yes,” James managed to say. “Yes, I’m here.”

“Is the murderer still in the building? Can you identify them for us?” they asked, their voice calm.

James glanced at Regulus, then at Sirius lying next to Remus, looking so peaceful at his lover’s side. He stared at him and finally, finally he made a decision.

“The murderer was Sirius Black.”