Our Universe

I though I was having a heart attack. Is this what heart attacks felt like? Because holy mother of Merlin, Juniper was- I mean I'd always thought she was beautiful. Her eyes especially, that's what any guy would notice, friend stuff, you know. But now, now, it's a whole other level. I could feel my breath catch in the back of my throat when I saw her walk down those stairs, what in the world had happened this summer? I couldn't stop staring at her legs, why couldn't I stop staring at her legs?! Was she- was this- was she doing this on purpose? Just to mess with me? Because bloody hell it was working. Her raven hair piled on top of her head like that, the curly strands wisping out from the top,  the strip of bare skin I could see peeking out between her shorts and the navy camisole. She's tan, when did that happen? Are british people even allowed to be tan? Whatever the case it's really working for her. What was happening? Was I physically ok? It's Juniper, Junie, Potter, your best friend. This was normal, right? Normal that Juniper in a camisole makes it hard for me to think straight. Normal that I wanted to run my hands through her hair. Normal that I wanted to lace my fingers through hers and never let go.

This was normal. Please tell me this was normal. She's my friend. My best friend. This wasn't happening. I've never wanted a relationship before. Never craved another's attention like this. Most of them came to me, and even then the idea of committing myself to someone in that way, seemed much too complex. But right now all I could think about was how simple it would be to take her hand and pull her into my body. To tuck that wayward strand of hair behind her ear.

She said my name. Now she's hugging me. She's talking to me. What is she saying? I have to answer her. What did she say? I opened and close my mouth like a fucking trout. What is happening? What is happening? Oh, James! James! Thank god you're here, buddy. I could hear Junie and Leo whispering about us in the background. Who cares? James saved me.

I missed all of them this summer. It's actually kind of sad how lonely I am without them. "Thank god you're back mate." I said, "I don't know how much more of Leo's incessant reading I could take. I'm suffering from Quidditch withdrawal, of course Charlie's been in bloody Romania all summer."

"Romania was fucking awesome." The screen door shut with a crash, "Dragons are badass. " Charlie strolled into the kitchen, sporting a variety of burns up and down his forearm.

"Oh my Godric, what the fuck happened to you?" Juniper gasped, as we all crowded around him.

"Eh," Charlie said airily, brushing us off, "it's just a few scars."

"Aunt Mione's going to kill you." Juniper told him, pressing her lips together. She was probably right.

"Don't you have press pictures for the election in like a week?" I queried, furrowing my brow. Rita Skeeter was going to have a bloody field day with that.

Charlie paled at the thought, "There's glamour charms..."

"Dude,"  James whistled lowly as we made our way back up the stairs, "Junie's right she's gonna send the birds after you."

"Since when did James start saying dude?" I murmured in Juniper's ear. Her hair smelled nice. Like lilies. STOP SMELLING HER HAIR YOU CREEP! At least I was actually speaking to her now.

"He picked it up in California." She whispered back, "Expect to hear lots of bros, chills, legits, and cools in the next few days." She warned, and I laughed.

"How was California?"

"It was good, great actually." She began enthusiastically. I had to admit I was a little hurt she'd had such good time. I expected her to miss me at least a little. "We surfed, I-" Vanessa and Rose's door swung open. She beckoned Juniper over, handing her an envelope. What was that? It couldn't be our Hogwarts letters already. It was too early for that.

"Letter? For Junie?" We all knew she was hiding something from the way she clutched the letter tightly to her chest. Oh no she didn't.

I snatched the letter out of her hands, grinning broadly, "Now who could be writing a letter to Junie? Who is Alex?" Alex? Maybe it was a girl named Alex. I hoped it was a girl. Why did I hope it was a girl? What was happening to me?

"Theodore Remus Lupin don't you dare!" She threatened, straining to get it back. I held it over her head teasingly. She was so cute when she was angry.

"Teddy!" She warned again, shrieking, "I swear to Godric if you-"

"Ahem, I unfolded the letter with flourish.  "Dear Juniper, oooh Juniper." He called her Juniper. What a dweeb. I already didn't like him. Who did he think he was? Calling her Juniper. Did he think he was better than us? I felt my fist clench around the paper. Calm down, Teddy.  "Very fancy. Dear Juniper, I miss you."

He missed her? Seriously who was this guy? I couldn't dwell on it much because Juniper decided to jump on my back. This was bad. This was very bad. Her bare legs were now hooked on my waist, and her arms around my neck.

"Leo!" I tossed the letter. And then looked back at Juniper, "You comfortable back there?" Ugh Why'd I do that? Because it was so fun to see her little nose make that Teddy is testing me face I loved.

"Shut up. I am not getting off of you until you give that letter back!" Good because I don't want you to get off, I thought, immediately reprimanding myself. Stop it, Teddy!

Leo continued reading, "I miss you. I don't know when this is going to get to you, but Happy early or late 16th Birthday. " Leo paused, "He was close."

"One day off." I scoffed. Anything to ding this guy. He wrote her a letter? Who the fuck does that?

Leo read, "Yes, I know it's your birthday, even though you didn't tell me. On purpose I suspect. James told me, and since I know he is probably reading this with you, Happy Birthday James."

"Thanks, Al!" James exclaimed excitedly.

"Also, tell him to stop calling me Al."

"He knows me so well." James smiled happily, clapping his hands.

And now he was stealing James as well. This guy was a real piece of work. My hands curled into fists again. Breathe, Teddy.

Leo scanned the rest of the letter, "I- oh wait you guys!" He tore something out of the letter, "You guys!" He gestured excitedly.

There was a picture. I peered at it closely. There was Juniper, in a bikini. Juniper in a bikini. Help. This was wrong. This was bad. This was very bad. There was a guy with her. He had his arm wrapped around her waist. I stared at his hand on her bare torso for much too long. Something unfamiliar and hot coiled in my gut. What was happening to me? I looked back to Juniper. She was smiling as she read the letter. Oh. She liked him. That coil tightened in my stomach, filling with white hot rage. I wanted to punch someone. WHAT WAS HAPPENING?

Oh good, we're going to the lake. The lake was fun. The lake was nice and cool and there were no boys to wrap their arms around my Juniper. The lake was normal. The lake was familiar. Things would be better at the lake.

Things were not better at the lake.

First of all, she asked me to tie her bikini. SHE ASKED ME TO TIE HER BIKINI. My fingers brushed against her soft skin and I nearly fainted. Me. Teddy Lupin. I've taken off more bras than I can count, but Junie asks me to tie her bikini and suddenly I'm stammering. She's going to know something's up if I don't cool it. What is up anyways? Do I even know? And then I said the stupidest thing of all. I called her my sister. Sister. Why the fuck did I say sister? I wanted to die in a hole the minute the words left my mouth.

And then I pushed her in the lake. Because I'm stupid and wanted to see her laugh, and I like arguing with her. And then I almost kissed her because my brain is broken. I almost kissed her. Jesus fuck. What was I doing? What was the matter with me? Wait what's that sound?

"OW!"

It sounded like- "Junie? Are you ok?" I rushed into the bathroom, forgetting I was only in a towel.

"Fine." She grumbled sourly, "Just my stupid hair. How bad is it?"

I winced, chuckling "It's a little Medusa-esque..." I hoped she would make her angry face. Or tell me to shut up. In truth it wasn't that bad. Junie's hair had always been crazy. I liked it.

"Shut up!" There it was. I felt her push me on the chest. Then she blushed. "You should- er go put some clothes on."

"Am I distracting you Potter?" I tousled my hair, trying to get a rise out of her. Serves her right. Wearing that top and those tiny shorts. God the shorts. All I could see were tan legs. Those shorts made me want to shove her up against a wall and- NO NO NO NO. James's smelly socks. Bubotuber pus. She is James's sister. She is James's sister. She is James's sister.

"Go put some fucking clothes on, Lupin."

"You sure?" I couldn't resist. I knew she was smiling in the bathroom.

"Ow! Ouch! Bloody- OW!"

"Oh for crying out loud." I rolled my eyes, taking the brush from her, "Let me."

"Excuse you? Teddy what are you-"

"Just let me brush your hair Potter." I carefully detangled the knots, being sure to take my time. I could tell she was relaxing. Her hair was soft, and I desperately wanted to run my fingers through it. Nope. Shh. Go away thoughts. Bad, bad decisions. I finished brushing, but wanted to stay there a little longer.

"What are you doing?"

"Braiding."

"Where in the world did you learn how to braid?"

"Sirius." It was true. Padfoot insisted I learn.

"Why are you better at braiding than me?"

"I'm a man of many talents." I lay back on the pillows, satisfied with my job well done.

"And just what do you think you're doing." Her eyes narrowed suspiciously.

"Getting comfortable." I said innocently, patting the seat next to me. Silently, I prayed she would let me stay. Apparently Merlin chose to love me tonight, and it was all I could do not to punch the air in victory.

She didn't touch me anymore. I didn't know when exactly it happened, or when I'd first started to realize it, I think it was sometime during fourth year. She'd always been affectionate, expressing emotion through physical acts. She used to fall asleep on my shoulder when we stayed up late envisioning some stupid prank or watching a tv show, wrap her arms around me like I was her personal teddy bear. (yes I'm aware of the irony of that statement) I never minded. In fact, I used to look forward to the sleepovers, to the times when she would grab my hand or my arm without thinking. I miss the way things used to be. I miss her hugs. I still don't understand why things changed. It was like some switch went off in her brain, and the worst part was that she still was her regular affectionate self with the rest of them. Leo, Charlie, she was still comfortable around them, it was just me. Just me.

That's why I'm so happy right now. No other underlying reason. Sure you prat, and that's also why you've been staring at her lips for the past twenty minutes. I couldn't believe I'd never noticed Junie's lips before, they're perfect. Just like the rest of her. Full and pink, I wondered what she tasted like...I wanted to-

NO!

I was confused. Right? That's the only possible explanation for the things I was feeling right now. She's supposed to be like my sister, she's my best friend, I couldn't possibly- I didn't know how to deal with this. I didn't know how to deal with the fact that Junie, my Junie was- I couldn't even say it.

She leaned back against me just like she used to, smiling up at me with those gorgeous green eyes of hers. I think I stopped breathing. She fit so perfectly in my arms. Merlin she was beautiful, I could just stare at her for hours. Oh wait- Fuck she was saying something to me. Fuck. Did she me staring at her lips? Fuck.

"Teddy?" She shifted on the bed, moving slightly away from me. I wanted her to come back. Come back, Junie. "Teddy, did you hear what I just said?"

Fuck not again.

"Er...yeah." I replied unconvincingly, clearing my throat loudly. Why did she move away from me?

"Teddy?" She raised an eyebrow at me.

"No." I grinned sheepishly, and she swatted my chest softly "Sorry what were you saying?"

"Movie's over." She moved even farther, "That means you've gotta go."  But I don't want to, Junie. "Teddy. We don't do sleepovers anymore, you know that."

"Are you going to sleep right now?" I challenged.

"Well-"

"So it's really not a sleepover."

"I said after the movie!"

"Please!" I was begging now but I didn't care. "James snores."

"I know. I shared a room with him for eleven years, remember?"

"Junie...." I pleaded again, making my saddest face possible. It screamed pity me. "What are you even going to do?"

"I dunno, watch another movie?" I was stalling and she knew it.

"Ah ha!" I had her, "The next movie is Jaws! Which means you need me to stay." She was adorably afraid of sharks. She could do gruesome gore any day but animatronic sharks was what got her. I think a lot of people would be surprised by that.

"You need a shoulder to bury your face in." I teased, "Last time you nearly shattered all the bones in my hand." I remembered the night. It was back before she decided not to touch me. She never let go of my hand. In fact, she fell asleep still holding it.

"I hate you." She chucked a pillow at me. I was hoping she would do that. I took my opportunity and tickled her, pinning her down on the floor. She was giggling, eyes bright. Just like the moment at the lake. I wanted to kiss her so bad it was painful. All I could think about was pressing my lips to hers and-

"Oh good you guys are up." A sleepy James stumbled into the room. He rubbed his eyes, taking in the scene. "Are we having a sleepover? Cool. We haven't had one of those in ages."

I sighed, helping Juniper off the floor. James and the timing. Although it was best. I couldn't kiss her. I couldn't. Right? Right. I couldn't. I watched as the clock flicked to midnight, Junie fast asleep, nestled between James and I. James snoring his arse off per usual.

I smiled down at Juniper, the moonlight reflecting off her dark hair, "Happy Birthday, Junie." I whispered into the night, gently brushing a stray hair from her cheek.

I was fucked.