5 - Who did this to you ?
At first she tensed a bit, seeing his hand so close to her reminded her of her mother, but she tried her hardest to keep in mind what they told him -He's safe, I don't have to be scared of him-
On his side, seeing her tensing up at the sight of his hand he retracted it and backed away a bit to give her some space.
"If you feel more comfortable like that, you can move it yourself but I need to see it"
But instead of following his idea, she held out her arm looking away in anticipation of how he might react. After all, he could always just be like some of her mother's friends and only acting like that to have the effect of surprises later when they would attack.
But instead of attacking her like she thought he would, he only moved her sleeves up to look at her arm. She could now feel his eyes stuck on her.
But what she didn't see was the look of horror plastered on his face as he was seeing all the scars, old and new, along with the wounds that were still open ,and that he could, for the majority of them, easily recognize as cuts made by a knife.
That made him boil with fury, the anger growing more and more as he was looking at them. He could slowly see the difference between them and his anger got to a new peak as he was looking at one and realized that the person that did that used multiple knifes, changing between them.
But before his brain could go any further in his hypothesis, she ripped her arm away from his loose grip, bringing him back to reality.
Because while he was stuck in his thoughts, he didn't see the little girl turning her head to take a quick look at him, checking what he was doing.
But by doing that, she saw the pure rage in his eyes, bringing her straight back to her mother's basement when she was coming down to see her sending her in a complete panic.
She then only had one objectives ; getting as far away as possible from his anger before he strikes. She ripped her arm out of his grip as quickly as possible and started to run to the door, ignoring the pain that was irradiating from her whole body.
It took 2 seconds for Remus to realize what was happening. As soon as he did, any trace of anger, rage or fury was now gone. Is protective instinct kicking in.
She was now at the door, trying to reach for the handle when she heard him hurry towards her, making her even more panicked.
-Why am I so little?! -
He was now at arm's reach, if needed he could catch her. But for now he wanted to not risk the small improvement he made with her and decided to go back to calming her down by speaking to her.
"Hey, hey, calm down I don't want to hurt you, I'm not angry at you, I promise"
This seemed to calm her down or at least enough for her to stop jumping in an attempt to reach the handle.
"What you saw on my face was towards the person that did that to you, not you"
This captured her attention, making her turn around to face him - Why would he be angry about my arms? And why towards mother?-
But he didn't let her wander in her thoughts long enough for her to figure out the answer to her questions, asking her the question she dreaded since the beginning without even realizing it.
" Could you tell me who did that to you ?"
Only hearing this question made her freeze on place, her mind racing once again, fear radiating from her. She knew she had to tell him but what if she knew she told him? What if she found her, what would she do? She would be furious, she'll know what she said!
Seeing the debate that was taking place in her mind by the look on her face and realizing what she must think he quickly told her what he thought would help her to open up and calm her racing thoughts a bit.
"I can guarantee you that whoever did that to you, they can't find you here. It's impossible to get in here if you're not supposed to. You're safe, I promise"
He looked at her with the hope that she would believe him, he really wanted to help her but he needed to know what was after her to be able to protect her.
It took her a moment to realize what he told her, she was safe? She couldn't find her here? But what if he was lying? Maybe he only tested her and was friends with her!?
But she remembered what 'mimi' told her, if he said she could trust him and was safe then it must be true. After all he never lied to her, not even once.
-maybe I can just tell him without saying her name?..-
She then looked at him and opened her mouth to tell him but found her throat paralyzed, like the words wanted to get out but her body wanted to keep them for himself.
Luckily, he noticed how the little girl was trying to speak to him without success, getting out of his pocket an old piece of parchment and a paper pen.
"If you want you can spell it slowly and I'll write down, at the end I'll know what you wants to tell me" he said in soft comforting voice.
For answer she nodded her head and started once again to tell him but this time much slower.
"Okay, so Mmm?"
This got him a shy nod from the small child
"Aaa? No, Ooo!?, is it o?"
She once again nodded, the fear eating her from the inside, but she knew she had to tell him, so she continued. Until they got to the impossible part, the R.
"Humm, Ooo? "
She shook her head while continuing her mimics.
"Okay, aaa?"
She once again shook her head but this time changed the way she was saying it, trying to imitate the only other way she heard this sound.
This confused him a bit at first, was she trying to scare him away? It then clicked in his head, she was mimicking a groaning!
"Grrr? No, rrrr! It's rrr?!"
But she nodded while redirecting her look at the floor, making him focus back on the main problem. After all she was telling him a name that even her own body was too afraid to say , -she must be terrified, but she is safe here, no one can find her, she knows it, so what can be so horrible about this name to put her in that state?-
But as he was looking at the paper he had in his hands, the realization hit him like a brick.
"Moter..., the person that did that to you is your mother?"
She didn't move, it was like someone was holding her in place, the only thing betraying her on what she was feeling was her face, contorsioned in an expression of pure panic and she was putting the few glimpses of will that she had on her body at this moment in keeping her tears at bay.
But he couldn't see it from where he was, he could only see her tensed body starting to shake like she was crying but no sound was coming out.
That made him even more concerned. Putting one knee on the ground, he bent himself to look at her in the eyes. Searching for a clear view of her face, that he almost immediately found.
Now being able to see her face, he saw how this only word paralyzed her out of fear, of her own mother...
"Cub, it's okay, I know it must have been really hard and scary for you to tell me, but I can promise you that now, with what I know, I won't let you go back there, never. You're safe here, with me." He said, his comforting smile never leaving his face the whole time.
But even with those words, she still didn't move. It's not she didn't want to or didn't believe him, it's simply that she seemed to not be able to get out of this state, it was like she was stuck and didn't know how to get out of it.
She wanted to move, to give him the answers he was asking for, but she couldn't. Her mind now stuck in this spiral, one worst than any other she ever experienced ; - what if he's wrong, or he's lying? But he told me that I could trust him and he never lied to me for now. But what if he was wrong? And maybe he's just like the friends of mother. But maybe he's telling the truth, but how could I be sure?-
This thoughts were endlessly spinning in her mind and nothing seemed to be able to stop them.
On his side, Remus was waiting for a sign that he said the right thing, searching for an hint of it in her eyes. But instead, he found something else in them. It was like they were screaming for help, his help.
This took him off of guard, but nevertheless, he tried to think of an idea and did the first thing that came to his mind.
At first he grabbed her chin and raised it for her to look at him. Seeing that she was letting him, he immediately grabbed her and pulled her in the tightest hug he could give her while staying careful to not hurt her, shielding her from the world.
This brought her immediately back. It took her a few seconds to realize what was happening, she didn't even knew what he was doing but what she was sure was that she never wanted it to end.
It wasn't like anything she experienced before, this was warm, and soft. She could feel this new feeling that she thought only existed in the stories; love, she felt loved, that was the word she was searching for.
And something else that made her guards crumple down, that she was feeling for the first time in her life, safety. -Maybe Mimi was right? He did nothing like anyone I've met before. Maybe he really is safe-
At this moment she wanted nothing more than snuggling in his arms but she didn't want to risk to make him think she was too clingy. She could still hear her mother's friend telling her to go away. That she was just a little attention attractor.
So she stayed still, taking in every bit he was willing to give her without pushing it, avoiding to ruin everything.
On his side, Remus was hoping with all his heart that his attempts worked. In one hand she didn't push him away or react negatively but on the other, it was the problem. She didn't react, she was still stiff as a stick.
But as he was going to let her go, to try something else, all of his hopes dead and the panic regaining him, something changed, she changed. Or perhaps she moved, not to push him away or anything like that, no, she relaxed.
Only a little bit of course, wouldn't she have been against him, he probably wouldn't even have noticed it. But she relaxed, she relaxed in his embrace, meaning it did brought her back and helped her to be more comfortable with him.
She was allowing him to hold her and felt comfortable enough with him to relaxe in his arms.
After a few minutes, he moved her a little, just enough so he could look her in the eyes. It's not that he wanted to send her away or was tired of it but he knew she must have some family, a father maybe that could take care of her.
"Cub, I need you respond to a few questions please, so I can help you. Do you feel okay with that?"