Part five
Regulus cursed. How many times did he tell the fucking postman to don’t leave the packages right in front of his door.
After a series of death wishes he stopped and frowned. Regulus is very much convinced he didn’t order anything. He arched one eyebrow, carefully bending down and picking up the box. He glanced around but didn’t see anyone who could´ve leave it there.
It was just a normal cartoon box, taped with paper tape on the top. It was medium sized, maybe one time bigger than his head, but it wasn’t heavy. He tried rattling it a bit and could hear one thud.
His brows deepened the frown as he squinted his eyes. He tried looking around again, but nothing changed. Regulus started rotating the box. Trying to find who send it just to-
“Fucking Potter,” he breathed, mouth agape. Regulus shook his head and watched the box like James himself might jump right out of it. With a frustrated sigh he took the box inside.
This made him completely forgot about the trash or his tea, or about the fact that he’s probably fired. He hurried inside, shutting the door behind him. There, in the hallway he just continued to stare at it for another few moments until he realised he bit his lip so hard it started bleeding.
He let out a hissing yelp, quickly covering it with his hand. In the bathroom, he tore a piece of a toilet paper and brought it to his pulsing lip. He really ought to stop doing this, it’s a nasty habit – the inside of his mouth is always irritated with bite marks and his lips are dry and cracked.
When it stopped bleeding he returned to the strange box, bringing it with him into the kitchen. He sat down at the table with a pair of scissors and went right for it.
With ease, he opened the box, revealing wrapping paper.
Regulus frowned again. What was James playing at?
He reached inside and took out the object that was wrapped, uncovering a letter in red envelope.
The thing was soft to touch and was weirdly shaped, all sorts of parts and pieces attached to it. He let out a snort after noticing the wrapping paper better. It had little stags all over which weirdly reminded Regulus of James for some reason. Finally, he tore it apart and inhaled sharply when he saw what was inside.
It was a fucking fox. And not just some fox, mind you. It was the fox. The fox from Little Prince and Regulus could cry.
Weird set of emotions started bubbling up in his chest. A mix of nostalgia, anger, sadness and joy overcoming him until he didn’t know what to do with himself. First of all, how did James Potter, a man he met two times in his life, knew that Little Prince was his favourite bedtime story as a child. Second of all, how did he have the audacity to just send it to him like this. Didn’t he gathered that Regulus clearly wasn’t speaking to him?
And the worst part about it was, that Regulus absolutely loved the stuffed fox.
He set it aside, reaching for the letter while ignoring the flutter of his heart. As he opened the envelope a strong smell entered his nose and his stomach twisted and lurched. It should not be doing things like this just because of the smell of him. Regulus fought the rising heat in his stomach and started reading.
Hello, Regulus!
I’m sending this right after the day you left home and I have no idea how long it will take to arrive, but please think of it as a Christmas gift. I noticed that you didn’t receive any at your brother’s and it made me sad because everyone deserves a Christmas gift, so yeah. Here you go.
I hope you’ll like it.
Cordially, James
Ps: I really hope we will see each other again
Pss: I’m sorry if I upset you during dinner Psss: You looked lovely, you are lovely, you
The bastard left the last row there, only crossed once with a neat line, leaving Regulus wondering.
The margins were decorated with handwritten hearts and snowflakes, and at the bottom of the paper James scrawled a little picture of them all along with Snuffles and the Christmas tree. Regulus was fighting the smile really hard at the moment, he couldn’t believe this. It’s absolutely absurd.
As he was reading it, he became unaware of the ringing in his ears and the fact that he could hear his heart beating. He closed his mouth quickly with a gasp and scrunched his eye shut after he finished. He’s absolutely going to hate himself for what he’s about to do next. He hates himself for even thinking about it- but does it nonetheless. He pulls the letter closer to his nose and breaths in the scent, immediately sending shivers down his whole spine. Whatever cologne or perfume James uses is ridiculous. It’s not even so good smelling, it has no right to send Regulus spiralling like this.
Regulus goes on about his day with a unconscious slime glued on his face.
-
“Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit-”
This was not good. This can’t be happening right now. To her. To them.
“James, I need you to just take Teddy, please,” Sirius asked one more time, the despair rising in his voice. “I can´t-”
“I know. I know, Pads, but I don’t think I can do it,” James said apologetically, his heart throbbing for his two best of friends in the whole world.
“You can do it, I know that you can. You’re amazing with him,” Sirius smiled tightly. James didn’t like the way it didn’t quite reach his eyes.
“Sirius.” James swallowed hard. “I can’t do it alone.” His eyes actually started to tear up and soon his vision became blurry. But even with eyes full of tears he could see something change in Sirius´ expression and just like that he whipped out his phone.
“Regulus? How would you like a little visit from Teddy, huh? You said you’d like us to come,”
And that’s exactly why James Potter is now sitting in a plane with his best friend’s kid on his way to somewhere he’s never been to.
-
It’s the middle of the night and Regulus can’t sleep. He’s still thinking about his brother’s words. That call happened three days ago and Regulus is still thinking about it. He wasn’t really sure what all of that meant, Sirius just threw it at him and didn’t say anything else.
“Wait, what do you mean Sirius?”
“Just what I said. Now, can you take him in?”
“I-uh,”
“Regulus.”
“I mean, I guess I can? When do you want to come?”
It just felt odd. Regulus thought of their previous conversation where Sirius was telling him he can’t and now he suddenly changed his mind? He knows better than that and he knows something happened.
Regulus is about to turn and fix the fucking pillow when he hears a knock on his door. He frowns and looks at the time on his alarm clock. It’s just past midnight. Who would fucking knock on his door at this hour. As he’s thinking there’s another set of knocks, now more urgent.
“I’m coming,” he said loudly enough for anyone on the other side of the door to hear. Regulus padded across his flat, feeling the cold wood floor under his bare feet which gave him goosebumps.
He opened to door just to rethink his whole existence. Was he actually dreaming right now? Is this real?
There, in the hallway was one very real looking James Potter with Teddy Lupin asleep in his arms. The bags and the suitcase also looked very real which was. Well. Not good.
Regulus stretched his arm out, touching James´ chest, just besides Teddy, and frowned at how real the fabric of James´ shirt felt and how real it felt to feel James´ flesh underneath the shirt. When James opened his mouth Regulus quickly snapped his hand away, eyes sharp.
“What the fuck?!” He hissed, trying his best not to wake Teddy up. “What the fuck are you doing here and what-” suddenly, he stopped, shutting his mouth. When he looked at James he was reminded of that night and the hatred started filling his chest.
“I’m sorry to interrupt your-” James gestured with his free hand at Regulus and even in hatred he wanted to shrink down and hide because, once more, he was standing, half naked, in the doorway with James Potter on the other side. He couldn’t choose which time it was worse – before he had the shirt and his underwear, and now he’s here standing in just baggy pyjama bottoms. He still managed to compose himself- at least on the outside- keeping his face straight.
“Potter.” Regulus gritted out through his teeth. This had to be some fucking cruel joke. “What are you doing here.” He was putting emphasis on every separate word, rolling the vowels and letters on his tongue, coating them with impatience and leaving no room for joking.
James let out nervous laugh, then coughed when Regulus sent him stare. “Well...” He scratched the back of his head, still balancing Teddy with his other arm. “Didn’t Sirius tell you?” James asked, frowning.
“No?” Regulus spit out. Oh, he’s certainly going to kill his brother. That’s for sure.
“Fuck,” James breathed out under his nose and closed his eyes momentarily.
“I am so sorry for-well, for everything,” James started after a second. “Can we just please,” he gestured at sleeping Teddy on his shoulder and then the inside Regulus´ flat. Regulus huffed but stepped aside, letting them in.
“I don’t even know where to start,” James said once they were stuffed in the hallway. He looked troubled, like he didn’t sleep at all for the last two days. Regulus pitied him. He was even a little bit disappointed. He remembers James strong and bubbly and, he hates to admit it but it’s true, charming. Now, there’s just this shell that not even remotely comes near as James Potter the day Regulus met him.
Everything was slowly coming together in his mind like a puzzle. He got a sense that all of this is actually a lot worse than what he previously thought.
“You can sleep on the couch,” Regulus muttered, going back to his room before James even got a chance to say anything.
Once in his bed again, Regulus let his head bang on the bed frame letting out a frustrated sigh. He had some theories, but he’s going to find out tomorrow.
The next morning, Regulus wakes up to a rustling sound coming from the hallway. It immediately sends him into a state of panic and makes him jump right out of bed. He gets urgently to the door just to remember last night’s events when his hand touches the knob. He groans, thinking of ways to make his brother’s death as long and painful as possible.
When he proceeds to breathe it out he turns back to bed, only to curse out loud when his foot steps onto something making loud clinking, ringing sound. Regulus stops, shaking at the impact and looks down. For fuck´s sake. He’s officially adding James Potter on the list of torture too.
He’s looking down at his foot nearly crushing pancakes, it’s really just a few centimetres away from it, but it makes him uncomfortable just as much as if it were right on top of the pile. The berries that were on top flew away when he stepped onto the edge of the plate, catapulting them under his bed and dresser. James Potter has officially made it the second time on the list.
Regulus huffs, bending down for the plate and brings it over to his nightstand. When he picked it up, he noticed a little paper appearing from underneath. It was in James´ handwriting and it said: “Thanks for letting us stay (and good morning)” With a bunch of little hearts and this time butterflies everywhere. He frowned, picking up the paper too, feeling the tingling sensation in the tips of his hands as he touched it. Regulus puffs and crumbles the paper in his hand, throwing it somewhere in the direction of his wardrobe.
Seriously, what was that man thinking? Did he really thought it would be a good idea to just leave it all right under his door like that? Of fucking course Regulus won’t notice. What is he? Some psychic to just feel when there’s a tiniest change? He should not be forced to let his guard up like this in his own fucking flat.
But he does have to agree that the pancakes look rather good.
He hates James Potter.
And Sirius Black. And the postman. And his boss. And his life. And his-
“Are you okay?” Comes from the other side of the door, making him jolt again. The door remains closed but Regulus still feels James presence like he was in the room. Oh, so much about pitying him yesterday. “I heard some noises and then you-”
“Well, I’m glad you have ears. Are you expecting me to praise you for using them or what?” Regulus says with his back turned to the door and his arms crossed on his chest. “Stop snooping around my room,” he adds after a second.
“I wasn’t snooping I heard it from the living room and-” Regulus huffed air out of his nose, cutting James off again. How fucking nice. He hoped the whole fucking building heard him.
“Go away,” Regulus commanded, really not in the mood. He could tell that for a few moments James lingered at his door, like he was hesitating or just concerned, but then Regulus could hear the footsteps and soon he was alone again. Or well, as alone as he gets to be with a toddler and a stranger in his flat.
He looked at the alarm clock again. It read 9:15 which meant he must have slept for longer than what he thought to. After two days in a row when he woke up at eight, he decided to just stop showing up to work. He wasn’t missed, based on the zero calls or messages, but he couldn’t give less of a fuck really. It was rather freeing, if he were honest. He really doesn’t know how he could even thought all of the free time would drive him mad. Now it seemed laughable. Maybe he’ll send a notice, a resignation, one day if he’s feeling like it. For now, he just relaxes. Or he did. He thinks that his free days stopped the second James put foot over the doorstep.
And he just started enjoying doing new things too. This is rather mean and of course it’s happening to him.
Regulus found out, that doing ceramics really helps him to calm down. He doesn't even know how the thought occurred to him but suddenly he was in the store buying five kilos of clay. He started doing plates and bowls, or well, it’s really just two plates and one bowl, but he’s getting into it. It’s still rather wobbly and thick, but he kind of likes it that way. Regulus likes the sensation of wet clay under his hands, he likes how it stretches out and the way it gets progressively warmer and warmer as he works through it. He also likes dipping it in glaze or painting pretty shapes and patterns on with a brush. What he doesn’t like is the mess that it leaves him with, but that’s a sacrifice he’s willing to take.
Now he’ll have to give it a stop.
Nice.
He tiredly sits on the bed, just looking out of the big window, thinking of Sirius. When he thinks of 1053rd way to murder him, his stomach grumbles and he sets his eyes on the plate with pancakes instead. He really, really hates this. He really hates James Potter and he really hates himself too because he’s reaching out for it and then he’s showing his mouth full. He hates even more that it makes his mouth water and an embarrassing sound escapes his mouth when he actually tastes the pancakes. It´s nothing like when he does it – well, it´s not like he tries very frequently. But these, oh, these tastes like heaven in your fucking mouth. Maye after all, he can remove James from the torture list at least one time. He doesn´t know what James did differently than him, he must have used the same ingredients that Regulus uses because it´s his fucking flat-
Wait.
It´s his fucking flat.
With that realisation Regulus abruptly bolts out of bed and snatches the pancakes with him, storming off in ´to the living room.
When he enters, James´s sitting on his couch with Teddy cradling him from behind, messing up his hair. He put multiple hair ties in it making James look absolutely bonkers. His hair isn´t really that long to call it ponytails, but there were at least seven of them all over. Focus Black.
“You fuck-” Regulus´ eyes darted to Teddy. “You freaking used my kitchen.” He exclaimed, throwing his arms up in fluster. “You snooped all over my fuc- freaking kitchen!” Regulus could crawl out of his skin.James and Teddy´s heads snapped right at him the moment he made himself known, the easy expressions turning into confusion. Teddy´s eyes started to shrink like he was about to cry. Oh, for fuck´s sake. James looked over his shoulder at Teddy, lifting him up and placing him in his lap, carefully stroking his hair. Then he started at Regulus like he just committed a crime.
“What did I say about the snooping around my things?” He ignored him.
“I did not snoop,” James said. “And that was after I already made you breakfast, which I assume you liked.” As he said this, he grinned, that shit-eating grin from ear to ear, making his dimples pop up. Regulus can die now. Dimples? Fucking dimples really? Stay focused Black.
He arched one eyebrow instead, tilting his head slightly.
“Oh,” James lets out breathy laugh, pointing at Regulus´ cheek. In a span of a second he brings his hand up, inwardly cursing when he feels the honey that the pancakes were dripped in. Regulus wipes it down with his hand, but he can still feel that his cheek is sticky.
“Anyway, this is not the point,” he continues.
“You look really cute,” James says like a fucking puppy. Completely ignoring Regulus´ cold behaviour. This makes Regulus stumble momentarily over his own words, brows furrowing once again. He subconsciously looks down at himself just to inhale sharply when he´s reminded that he´s still only in his pyjama bottoms. He closes his eyes, breathing in and out.
“James.” He says, warning in his tone.
“Um, yes?” James replies, looking bit like a deer caught with the headlights, right in the middle of the road. Regulus glares at him and sees him visibly swallow.
“Yes.” James repeats after that, looking down at the floor, his lip caught in his teeth.
Teddy looks up at him, still in his arms, and whispers something which Regulus can´t make out.
“It´s Regulus, Bear,” James says in a low voice but loud enough for Regulus to hear. “Don´t you remember? He´s Sirius´s little brother,” he continues explaining when Teddy shakes his little head. This makes one string in Regulus´ heart to snap, not sure why in the first place.
He coughs then clears his throat. “Anyway, just don´t snoop around my stuff,” Regulus says, the silence in the room buzzing, making him uncomfortable.
“Again, I wasn´t-”
“Yeah, whatever,” Regulus rolls his eyes and leaves the living room to go to the kitchen. He thinks of the way Teddy tensed up when he entered the room and how he literally almost made him cry. He thinks that he doesn´t want that. Something just roars in him, telling him “take care of him” “Don´t leave him”. It makes him a bit sad when he´s thinking about it for too long so he bussies himself with cleaning the dishes.
Regulus looks around his kitchen – everything seems to be in its place, but he´s still suspicious. He really doesn´t like the idea of James using his stuff. He doesn´t like anyone touching his stuff really. The only few exceptions being Pandora and Barty, but even they make him cynical sometimes. He likes his privacy, okay.
He´s just finishing up cleaning the plates that were in the sink when he feels James´ presence again. Honestly, he doesn't know how he knows. He just knows. Somehow, James´ energy radiates of him way stronger than anyone else he met before. It´s radiant and buzzing, full, raw and almost electric. It makes the fine hairs on his neck stand up and his ears to pick up every breath James takes. His presence is warm and loud, like summer days or the waves crashing on the shore. Regulus´s afraid it´s going to burn or take him down.
He´s standing with his exposed back turned to James, yet he can feel his eyes roam all over his body. Finally, James speaks.
“I´m sorry. I didn´t want to make you uncomfortable.” Regulus finishes the plates and puts the last one to dry next to the other ones already on the rack. He turns to James, crossing his arms.
“Well, under the conditions of a stranger staying in your flat, you can´t fell any different than that,” Regulus says. “Just your bare existence makes me want to crawl out of my skin and there´s nothing you can do to change that.” He isn´t sure if he´s talking about the good way James makes him want to crawl out of his skin or tha bad way. Well, both are bad, but still.
James inhales, seemingly hurt but there´s still gleam of ambition and dedication in his eyes.
“I think that if you´d get to know me better, I wouldn´t make you so...” he stops to think, eyes squeezing a bit in the process. “This.” James gestures to Regulus with his crossd arms and cold aura floating everywhere around him. It makes Regulus huff and roll his eyes.
“Yeah? Good luck with that,” Regulus says. “Now, please don´t touch anything more than you already did, I´m going to take a shower.” And just like that he leaves the room and walks back.
Regulus is glad that the only bathroom with bath and shower in his flat is acessable only from his bedroom because that means no James Potter will touch it. He is so glad in fact that he even feels a little bit bad before giving no fuck at all again. At least, that will mean that James will stink which will make everything easier. Now, he just need something to happen to his personality and Regulus think he´ll be able to shield from the sunburn. It makes him grin as he enters the shower and lets the water run.
His mood only lasts for a few moments thought before he remembers why James is here in the first place. Something terrible has happened to either Sirius, Remus or Nymphadora and it´s possible that their worlds are currently falling appart. He feels bad again.
Regulus tries to think of all the scenarious and theories but none of them prepare him for the real world.
He sits James down on the bar stool while Teddy sleeps peacfully on the couch. He´s completely knocked out, probably still sleeping off the jet lag. James looks worried again - he´s fisgeting with his fingers, sitting restlessy and spinning on the stool from side to side. His hair is still a mess from earlier and there are dark circles under his eyes. Regulus stands opposite of him, leaving the bar between them.
“So,” he says. “Go on.” By the look on James´ face he can tell James knows what he´s talking about. With the shaking breath he takes in, Regulus knows it´s really not good.
“She´s-” heartbreak, pain and saddnes overtake his facial expression, leaving him with squinted eyes and downturned pink lips. James lowers his voice, looking behind at sleeping Teddy.
“She´s dying, Regulus.”
Oh.
Images and snappets of conversation snaps into his mind. He thinks of the Christmas. He thinks of Teddy´s mom and Remus. He thinks of the photograph on the wall and her bubbly smile and crazy hair. He thinks of what he heard when she and Remus were talking.
“Thanks for taking him,”
“No problem, Dora, Sirius was actually rather excited about it you know.”
“Oh, I´m sure he is. Soon, Teddy will forget who´s actually his mom, I think.”
Regulus now understands. He wishes he didn´t.
“I´m sorry, I-” he stops himself. What is his place to say anything about all of this? This is just horrible. Regulus isn´t sure if he can even talk about it. It feels like he doesn´t have the premission.
“Is there anything that could help? Anything at all?” He asks instead. The least he can do is offer the money for the treatment, he thinks.
“Cancer,” James says, his voice sounding rasp and raw. “Already eathing and fucking destroying nearly all of her cells. We tried,” he continues and the build up stress is slowly showing to the surface. “We tried so hard and everything there was to try.” His voice vobbles and he bites his lip again. Regulus finds himself doing the same.
“You know,” James whispers after he tries composing himself. “It doesn´t feel- you don´t even think- it can happen to someone until it´s someone you love.” Finally, James hits the breaking point and his whole body shakes with a sob that escapes his mouth. Regulus watches him from the other side of the bar, carefully eyeing him, not knowing what to do. Another heart string breaks loose at the sight, Regulus can´t help it happen.
He lets out quiet gasp. That´s why Sirius couldn´t come.
Regulus was hating his brother for helping his dying friend and he fucking hates himself for it now.
“She´s been in and out of the hospital for the past year or so,” James says. “Never really recovering enough but it was alaways something and the doctors were just disgustingly stupid for giving us the hope.” Regulus is still watching him. Everything, all of this, is just- He doesn´t know what to do, how to react.
“But for these last three months it´s been getting worse and worse, she was so strong-” And there´s another raw sob breaking free, going right from James´ gut.
“But it was stronger,” Regulus finishes. It. He can´t even fucking say it out loud. He just settles for phatetic it.
James finally meets his gaze and Regulus whishes he didn´t. His eyes are red-rimmed and glossy from the tears that continue to steam down both of his lovely cheeks. Regulus bites the insides of his mouth feeling, welcoming, the familiar taste of iron as a old friend.
“Sirius and Remus tried with every last effort but nothing was enough. It is never enough in the end,” James sighs. “They took care of Teddy but it was breaking everyone´s heart to have him there. Watching his fucking mother slowly but surely fading away. He´s still just a fucking baby, Regulus he-” Regulus stepped closer, legs pressing into the wood of the bar and he carefully reached over, touching James´ hand. Just the tips of his fingers, really, but it was there.
It was meant to be a form of comfort in a situation that left you none. In a way it was cruel – giving James another thread of hope to cling to, just to snap it away. Regulus decided to dull his scissiors and let him hang for a little more.
He felt James´ fingers slide deeper under his own, until they were fully tangled together. Maybe in different circumstances, Regulus´ heart would pump so much blood to his cheeks that he turned into tomato and the ringing in his ears would be the only indicator of the fact that this is really happening, but now- he doesn´t even dare to stray to give it more thought. Right now it´s just Regulus absorbing some of James´ sorrow and pain through their connected fingers. It´s not much- after all, it´s just their fingers touching- but it´s enough to make James stop crying.
Another thing about absorbing other one´s feelings like this is that, well, you absorb them. You are like a sponge, able to feel the sadness and it makes you a little miserable too but it´s by a choice.
Maybe in a way it´s also merciful. Giving James something to cling to. Regulus doesn´t know.
“I understand,” he says calmly, giving James´ fingers one last tug and pulls away. “You can stay,” Regulus whispers and James just nods. He keeps nodding his head like that until Regulus realises he´s actually shaking. Regulus sucks in a sharp breath.
“Hey,” he says tentatively which makes James look up at him again. “Um, you can use my stuff actually.” Regulus tries to lighten up the situation and it helps. A little at least. James smiles, a small, inconspicuous smile. “But don´t touch my personal stuff.” That seems to deepen James´ smile and he lets out a quiet laugh.
“Thank you,” James says sincerely. Regulus nods and remains quiet. Teddy is sleeping on his couch, mindless of the fact that when he wakes up, he might have already lost his mom. Suddenly there´s an urge in the pit of Regulus´ stomach, telling him, blaming him for never reaching out sooner. He knows it´s stupid, to think that maybe he´d have been able to help, but he just feels so useless. Suddenly, he´s sad that he´ll probably never get to meet Nymphadora properly.
He thinks that life is just like forest. The big, strong trees consuming nearly all of the nutrients and water, leaving the rest to manage rain by rain. Sometimes, they make it if their roots are deep enough - but the other times when the roots are attacked by insects or the soil is polluted there’s no help left. They slowly start dying and then collapse, but before that their seeds can get carried away by the wind and land a few meters away, somewhere where the soil is suitable for a strong tree and before they die, they leave new hope for the next one.
He wishes he was a tree sometime.
“Have you ever tried ceramics, James?” Regulus asks, changing the subject completely. James just frowns, shaking his head. Regulus grins and makes him follow to his study.
“What are you doing? What happened to no snooping?” James asks, confused by the sudden change. Regulus just shrugs and closes the door behind them.
James stays put, mouth slightly agape as he looks around himself. “Well, I do have to say that you are really close to beating Moony´ personal collection,” he says breath-taken. He´s looking at all of the books. There´re two big bookshelves built perfectly to mimic the whole length and hight of the walls, basically framing them completely. In the center of the room, Regulus has his work-desk which is covered in mess from clay and supplies at the moment. In front of it, there’s a big window running through the whole wall, letting lots and lots of natural sunlight in. He thinks some artist lived here before him.
“They´re hardly all mine,” Regulus says even thought they’re theoretically are all his. “Some of them are parents´,” he explains when James looks at him. Good, there’s no sign of crying left on his face now.
“I found out that working with clay is rather soothing,” Regulus exclaims and strolls over to the big desk. He waits a little for James to come closer, seemingly having some inner debate with himself at the moment.
“You make ceramics?” James asks and finally walks over, new kind of curiosity in his voice.
“No,” Regulus deadpans, rolling his eyes after. Then reminds himself to maybe not be so mean, jesus, this poor man just told him his friends kid’s mother is about to die soon. He shuts up and pulls out a smaller lump of clay.
He starts working through it, rolling out the air bubbles and warming it up – all that while James´ eyes never leave his hands. Regulus then begins to make a flat piece, for now just roughly, only using his hands.
“Try,” Regulus says and steps away, letting James touch his things.
He brings out his own lump of clay from the bag and starts mimicking what Regulus did moments ago.
“Yeah, like that,” Regulus murmurs from besides him. “You can wet your hands if you feel like it´s too sticky,” he points at a bowl sitting at the edge of the table. James looks up from his lump, his eyes drafting from the bowl to Regulus. He stops working though it and just openly stares. Regulus rolls his eyes, continuing with his own creation.He dips his hands in the water which leads James to do the same – Regulus rolls his eyes- honestly, he feels like they’re going to fall out if this man does something again.
“What?” James asks, brows furrowing. Regulus chuckles.
“Nothing,” he says like an angel. “See, I said it was calming.” James is no longer gripping the clay like his life depends on it, his hands are still a little in a spasm but it’s getting somewhere, and his face softened too. Regulus likes that.
He started working on a mug, he decided, because he just felt like it. Regulus didn’t do stuff just because he felt like it in a long time. It’ll also add nicely to his set. He started with the flat base and cut out circle for the bottom. With a ruler he measured the rest, cutting out a long rectangle shape. He still could feel James’ eyes on him but didn’t bother to do anything about it. Carefully, Regulus picked up the rectangle and started attaching it to the existing circle, dipping his hands in the water again and using the tips of his fingers to smooth out the edges and joints. When he manages to stick the two pieces together, he’s left with a roll that’s not really mug-like. Yet. He bends down for another piece of clay, struggling a little to detach it from the massive bulk. Regulus starts the same process as before, but this time he skips flatting out the base and just models it in his hands. When he’s happy with the shape he attaches the handle to the “roll”. It’s not his best work, really it’s actually the worst one he made out of the few tries before, so he just smashes it all together and starts again.
“No-“ James starts to protest but is too late. “Why did you do that?” he asks, frowning. His lump of clay is still shapeless and just sits on the table.
“I didn’t like it,” Regulus answers honestly already modeling new base for the mug.
“Well, I liked it,” James says which makes Regulus roll his eyes.
“That’s because you like everything, it’s sickening,” he huffs. James really is like a puppy in a way. Just so pure and eager, and fucking adorable. Regulus doubts there’s something wrong about him. Everyone loves puppies – and everyone seems loves James.
He starts shaping his own mug, trying to mimic Regulus but he’s too stiff, putting pressure in all the wrong places.
“I can´t even look at you, wait,” Regulus murmurs, stepping over. He´s gently pressed against James´ back, reaching out to cup his hands and guide him. Regulus can feel the drastic temperature change - James´ hands are so warm against his- and he fights the shiver running down his spine.
He already knows how they feel on his thigh, slowly driving him crazy, but he can´t tell if they´re soft or rough because of the dried-up clay. A pity, he thinks. Regulus, with a new pair of hands now, starts warming the clay. It´s so much easier with James´ hands, they´re big and strong, great for such activity, they just need a bit of training.
They´re slowly finished with making the lump flat now when Regulus springs back to reality.
“Stop staring,” he says, not even looking up from the table. He can feel it - James´ gaze is like the sunrays kissing his cheeks. The sun is too close and he´s not willing to burn his skin.
“You are so much more lovely when you don´t have that scowl on you face,” James ignores him. “I mean, it´s not like you´re not lovely even when you do it´s just-”
Regulus rips his hands away, making distance between them again.
“Shut up,” he orders, not hearing anything else. Then, he starts working on his own again, in the safety of his personal space.
“How did you even know I was staring at you,” James wonders, eyebrows raised in question.
“Could practically feel you fucking burn a hole into my head.” Regulus didn´t mean it to be funny. It wasn´t funny at all, yet James is chuckling, the sound filling up the whole room. Regulus frowned and looked at him with arched brow.
“Please be mean to me, I changed my mind,” James says with a dreamy look on his face that mixes with a grin.
“Is that your kink or what?” James laughs again, now more clearly and cheerfully. He really is a fucking puppy. They do stuff they´re not allowed to do, they know they´re not allowed to do and still get away with it because they´re too cute to actually be angry at. Regulus is a cat person.
“Oh, maybe because of you it is,” he says with a ring of that laughter still present in his voice. Regulus rolls his eyes and throws a little ball from the clay at him. James tries to swat it away but he´s too late and it lands in his hair.
“Not my hair!” he whines and throws one right back at Regulus who catches it before it hits him. “And this is not fair, you clearly have some super-sense for catching things,” James continues. “And people.”
It´s Regulus´ time to grin but he doesn´t make it as obvious. “Don´t act like you don’t like it,” he challenges. He loves every second that different emotion and thought flickers on James´ face, like he´s broken and too stunned to speak. Regulus lets out a quiet chuckle and that seems to send James to completely different dimension, through the roof and the sky. Like he´s spiralling endlessly on the inside but he´s made out of clear material and Regulus can see right through.
He smirks and starts making the handle for his mug in silence. After a while, James seems to get it back together and he follows Regulus´ lead, slowly finishing the body of his own mug too.
They are nearly finished when Teddy starts calling out for James from the living room.
James hurries quickly to get to him, leaving Regulus alone. It´s then when he notices the heart-shaped holder on James´ mug.