Child
Sirius never felt so relieved in his life.
When the judges didn’t call his name all he could hear was his Mother saying how he was worth nothing, how his dreams didn’t matter, and how he was worthless. As much as those words hurted him, he was used to them but what really struck him was Regulus’s broken voice, like he had been crying saying “what about the plans we made, Siri?”.
Disappointing his brother was something he didn’t think he would be able to live through.
When they called his name along with the boys back to the stage, he didn’t allow himself to feel like he had won.
That was a television show, they probably wanted better takes of their crying faces.
So the second Minerva gave them the news he was crying.
He had jumped in Remus’s arm without a second thought, and Lord knew how it felt right.
The way Remus’s arms wrapped around his waist, and he was strong enough to carry Sirius easily did something to Black’s brain he could understand, let alone explain it.
Eventually, he found himself on the ground, face on James’s neck while they hugged, mind screaming “I didn’t forget the plans we made, Reggie. I’ll never forget them, child”.
When all the commotion stopped, he found himself with the other three boys, waiting for their rides. Actually, waiting for James’s mum since Remus was to take the tube and Pete and himself were to take cabs.
“We have little over a week till judge's house, we have to figure something out,” James said.
His hair was messy - more than usual - and his eyes were red but he still looked quite attractive. Sirius looked at the blokes around him and was happy to come to the conclusion they were very handsome.
Pete’s blonde hair and sweet eyes made Sirius want to hug, but he could see the angry match waiting to be stricken lurking in his eyes. That was definitely captivating and almost hot.
For Remus, he supposed he was biased to say, but he was gorgeous. The mysterious and effortless vibe around just pulled you closer and closer toward him, and he didn’t even seem to notice it.
If he wasn’t going to make it on his own in this public vote base competition he was glad he had a group of handsome people around him to draw the votes from teenage girls.
Of course, the talent mattered, but he wasn’t daft, he knew they had to appeal to the public and with completely different aesthetics between them that complimented each other so well, they might as well have doubled their votes.
“We also need a name,” Remus pointed out.
“They’re so much to do,” Pete said, half worried, half excited.
“I’ll talk to my mum when she gets here but you all could stay a few days at my place so we sort things out,” James offered.
“You know my mum, James, she’ll never let me crash at yours but I live two houses down the road so I suppose it’s okay,” They all agreed that outside of Pete they’d talk to their mums - Sirius would never, he would just find a way to sneak out again and handle punishments after, “Alright, lads, gotta go now or mum will go crazy.”
And with that Pete left, soon followed by Remus.
Sirius, bag in hand, went to the bathroom to change followed by James.
They kept a quick conversation going, barely finishing their sentences before the other completing them.
As Sirius changed, James didn’t bother to turn around, very excited and talking about an upcoming hockey game.
His eyes didn’t glance once at Sirius’s bad leg until Black went to check on the bandage. He pulled it up, slightly and James saw the raw and red skin, trying to recover and he knew that it wasn’t caused by footie. It was fire.
James’s mind raced as he tried to understand why Sirius had a burn - a bad one - on his ankle.
Did he trip next to a fireplace? Nah, he handled himself too well for that.
Possibilities ran through his mind at the speed of light and suddenly it hit him, someone had done it. But who?
Sirius had mentioned he was homeschooled so no bullies. It had to be at home. He spoke too dearly of his brother - only brother, James knew because Sirius had told him - to be his fault.
The answer was right within his touch and he couldn’t handle touching it.
It’s not a light thing to realize your friend - and now bandmate - was being abused at home.
All of those thoughts occurred to him in a span of seconds and before Sirius could notice, he continued to talk like he had been, hoping it would fool Sirius.
He really needed to talk to his mum.
Right on cue, she called.
“It’s Mum,” James said, pointing to his phone and putting it next to his ear, “She’s waiting for me, she says,”
“Go on, go meet her,” Sirius said, closing the buttons on his shirt, “I’ll be out in a second. Don’t leave till I do, I wanna meet her,”
James gave him his best smile and practically ran off the bathroom.
His mum was waiting for him, big smile and open arms that he gladly fall into.
Hurriedly, he told his mum all he found out about Sirius and begged for help.
She looked at him in utter shock, not because she didn’t believe him but because she couldn’t fathom that someone could do that to a child.
When Sirius emerged from the bathroom, looking all formal and put together, Effie saw the limp as nothing passed her eyes and she felt rage burning inside her.
Almost out of instinct, she pulled Sirius close in a tight hug.
He felt so uncomfortable yet comforted by that. His mother never hugged him.
“Do you need a ride home, Sirius?” She said.
“Oh no, I’ll take a cab,” He answered sheepishly.
“Nonsense, I’ll take you” Effie decreed with her tone that no one could doubt her decision. Sirius, backed against a wall, gave her his address.
༄༄
Regulus was so fucking glad he was alone.
His father was off at work, as always.
Kreacher went to the market and he always took ages there.
And his Mother had called the house phone earlier to say that she was visiting their cousins after the Lestranges. Of course, she was planning something, nothing good came when Druella and Walburga Black saw each other.
All of that considered, he was glad she wasn’t in the house when Sirius arrived in a car that wasn’t a cab.
He ran in quietly, but Regulus caught him on the stairs.
“What are you doing?” He had asked.
“There’s something really import I need to do,” Sirius said, rushing to his bedroom.
Regulus watched Sirius packing clothes in a big black bag by the dorm frame, too focused on the story his brother was telling about the things that happened today.
That’s how he learned about Peter and his killing voice, Remus and his perfection, and James and his good heart.
“Sirius, have you lost your fucking mind?” Regulus found himself almost yelling. Sirius just rolled his eyes, “Mother burned your leg because you left for one afternoon and it was bad enough that you left her while she was going to marry you to Panda. Now you want to leave for five days?”
“Yeah, pretty much,” Was Sirius’s response and Regulus could feel his blood boil.
“That’s so fucking stupid” He shouted out of pure anger,
“And I’ll deal with whatever she comes up with next,” Regulus could tell his brother was getting worked up by the way he was throwing the clothes in the bag and his voice being a little too controlled.
“You will? ‘Cause, you’re fucking superman or something,”
“I might as well be,”
“What is that supposed to mean?” Regulus asked, a voice in his head already telling him.
“Nothing,” Sirius shrugged off, “Look, Reg, as long as it doesn’t touch you, I can deal with whatever she throws at me”
That was supposed to calm Regulus, he could tell, but it only made it worse because their Mother knew. Of course, she did.
He wasn’t afraid of the punishment itself, but more of what Sirius would do to himself if Regulus caught the blame.
“Sirius, She burned your fucking leg!” Regulus could tell he was screaming and he sound a lot like their mother but that didn’t matter at the moment. He just hoped he could make his brother come to his senses if he said that enough times. “I’m worried about you, christ,”
“Yeah? And where were you when she burned my fucking leg?” Sirius yelled back, his voice mimicking Regulus’s.
And that, that sentence and all it implied was like a punch to Regulus’s stomach.
He let out a sob, muffled by the back of his hand.
He forced his voice steady almost to resemble Father’s.
“You will not go to a stranger’s house, stay there for days and come back here-”
“Then I won’t. Come back, I mean” Sirius said, cutting his brother off.
Bile filed Regulus’s throat with the thought of his brother not coming back, but he knew there was nothing he could do.
While he knew Sirius was just speaking out of heat because of the argument, Regulus also knew that was the thing he wished for the most and it seemed unfair to stop him.
Swallowing his pride and everything tucked in his throat begging to come out, he tried a more sensible approach.
“You can’t just take all the weight of the world and carry it on your shoulders,” Regulus’s voice almost pleaded, tears streaming down his face freely, “Don’t do this, please,”
“I’m not, Reg, I promise” His voice was softer but his tone made clear he didn’t want to hear anything else about it.
So he leaned in the wall across the hall, in front of Sirius’ room, and watched his brother pack like the mere spectator he was - or felt like.
His brother closed the bag and stood in front of him, mirrors of each other and yet so different.
Sirius bumped his shoulder into his brother’s, starting to walk through the hallway.
“You’ll really leave the family?” Regulus asked his voice nothing but a whisper. Regulus was well aware it was a low blow but it was all he had. His brother stopped mid-step, turning around slowly. As the brothers locked eyes, Sirius let out an incredulous laugh, gesturing to the house.
“You know Reg, there comes a time when a blind man takes your hand and says ‘Don’t you see?”’ Was all he offered as an answer. He knew what Sirius meant, though he refused to even think about it. Regulus’ anger started to water down, giving space to hurt and melancholia.
It wasn’t unknown or unwelcomed, he knew that feeling. The familiar bone-shaking ache made all of Regulus’ walls go down.
His eyes filled with water and he did nothing to stop the tears from falling.
“Will come back?” Both of them knew how the sentence was finished. Regulus was never one to ask anything of his brother but he was trying so hard not to let Sirius go, he had to try.
“I’ll come back to you even if the world is burning. You’re my baby brother, Reg,”
“So, we’ll be alright?”
“We’ll be alright, child,”
Scoffing because of the nickname, Regulus allowed himself to fall into his brother’s arms.
His heart was so tight, but Sirius’ arms, somehow, let it all loose.
They walked to the door together and the younger Black saw James, standing outside of the car, hands in his pockets.
He gave Sirius a smile so bright Regulus swore the Earth had two suns. Sirius, of course, met him halfway with a smile so genuine it made Regulus’s core soften.
Part of him wanted to hate the interaction because it showed he had someone to share Sirius with, and also cautious about it. They didn’t know each other and he was taking a pivotal role in Sirius’ life and career.
Even with all of that, he was grateful there was someone who was going to take care of his brother.
James gave Regulus a gorgeous grin - not as beautiful as the smile but still absurdly charming - and a wink before he got in the car.
Somehow, Sirius had found a friend as ridiculous and attractive as him. He didn’t know about the other members, but he would pay a lot of money to see that boy on stage.
Later in his room, Regulus would reflect on the day’s events.
He trusted Sirius.
He knew that wasn’t a ‘goodbye’ but why did it taste like one-sided closure?