Iris stood behind Jiao, looking at the yellow hoodie that was snug on the girl before her. It was rare to see her so upset, knowing she had experienced a violation, a student spitting on her. She stood there and watched her in the silence that hung heavily in the air, only the wind blowing being the only background noise on the roof of the high school. Jiao had said something that was on her mind for some time, clearly, which was that she wanted to go to university with Iris. It was odd, for Iris, to see someone so willing to be vulnerable. She wanted to be tough, strong, reject that offer and call her an idiot for wanting that.
She wanted that, badly… but for some reason her mind drifted, it drifted off to a scenario... what if she agreed?
Iris and Jiao would graduate from high school, and choose a university to attend. Iris has always been pushed towards a medical degree for… her whole life. Jiao seemed to like people and food. She’d likely have chosen a degree in the culinary arts… maybe they’d find something in the University of Toronto or Quebec, something along those lines… Iris could finally move out of that apartment and move into student housing with Jiao. She could smell the autumn leaves, the ground crunching underfoot with dead yellow, orange, and red maple leaves as they walk to their classes. She could see herself holding hands with her. They both struggled with staying warm that time of year, and she could feel the nervous squeeze in her hand. The heavier girl would probably offer to make something for her. Iris never liked food much, but Jiao likely would be so proud of her creations she could not say no to her.
She imagined the late nights studying.
Medical homework would be stressful, their home in their off-campus housing would probably smell sweet. Sickeningly so. Jiao’s homework would probably be something edible, distracting. Iris would need to take this time to go smoke out of the window and let the cold air reset her mind as she pondered what to do about all of this. Jiao would probably demand affection. No, demand would be too strong of a word, she would… appreciate the affection. She would probably complain her bed was cold. A cold bed wouldn’t do at all for a burgeoning chef, how would she wake up to make coffee for Iris to drink on her way out of the door, frantic for a midterm.
Iris let her mind wander more.
What would their night in the same bed be like? Jiao was always needy… always wanted Iris’s attention, approval… she probably would do anything Iris asked if it meant her praise. The thought alone made her see the Jiao in her mind on a leash, on her knees. She could make her do whatever she wanted so long as she got a good girl out of Iris, right? Jiao always loved her praise since it was so few and far between... she could even have a set of ears and a tail that wags. She always wanted a puppy...
This train of thought needs to be derailed…
Iris brought herself back to the present by closing her jaw on her tongue… they were sweet fantasies, but inconvenient… terribly inconvenient. The silence hung between the two for an unknown amount of time. Jiao had since turned to face Iris and she seemed to be searching her face for an answer. Would she go to university with her?
She seemed content with the expression on Iris’ face as an answer.