Regulus was not dancing. But everyone else was.
Barty and Evan were shamelessly flirting in the corner, Dorcas was busy doing god knew what. Pandora was asleep and far away.
Sirius was having fun not too far away from him with the other marauders. He was smiling so brightly, Regulus' own heart felt tiny in front of it. He held the entire world in his hands and he couldn't be bothered to care, he was wearing colors like they were birthed for his skin. No scars, no burdens, no family titles in sight to hide him from anyone who wanted to see.
He looked so alive, an image so lively it was fucking emotional. Regulus couldn't even think of a moment where he felt half as happy as that.
The party was fucking up with his head. He never was this emotional.
Everyone was moving and talking despite Regulus wanting the quiet. And that's when he noticed him.
He was right next to his brother, he had looked at him a thousand times before and he would look at him exactly a thousand times more after this. But if Sirius was a star, god James was the sun. Right that instant no more words were left to be dedicated to him
It was like an enchantment, so so sudden. He was smiling casually but he was melting Regulus' heart. The music never slowed down, it must have sped up or maybe that was just his heartbeat. James was moving his hips and his hands were up. He was showing someone a movement or something, maybe Remus, maybe...
He looked away just to close his eyes. The darkness of his steady cowardness couldn't prepare him for what he saw next. It was James yet again. Red lights were shadowing his dark skin but no more light was needed to show him off.
Regulus was flying so high that he needed to come down for oxygen.
A voice shouted his name and two heads turned to stare. One was James and one was Regulus. The voice was Lily Evans and the smile spent for her was a slower magic to leave his system. It was shy, as it always was around her but it held such joy. James looked at her with such care, the kind she deserved, the kind he wasn't afraid to give, and the same kind she was always quick to throw away.
But she was indeed looking back, her always strict figurine transforming into something else. James left the boys and went dancing in the middle of the room with his hands still up, clapping along to the music. And she followed him, chin up, her flames following.
Regulus wasn't one to stare, so perhaps it was the dark atmosphere or the liquor on his lips making him feel so flustered. He could count the beats between the two of them, always too far away from him.
James was always a step too far away for him, just never enough. It wasn't even attraction, the kind he was allowing himself to so cruelly engage in. James and his comfort were always out of reach. Sirius got away first but who got Regulus away? Regulus wanted James to look at him and know. Because someone as bright as him would know when someone needed him, he would just know he needed rescuing. Wouldn't he?
But now James didn't have eyes for him, he had eyes for Lily. But all Regulus could see was him and damn the red aphrodite next to him.
Did he so selfishly want James Potter to romance him into making him happy? Yes. Was it James he needed or what James offered?
James had his hands on her hips, caressing them while Lily had her arms around his neck. Dancing slowly. That could have been him, dancing against him, James' hands touching his body.
Perhaps he just needed James, in every way he could get him. If only he took his eyes off of her...
James never did and Regulus drowned his sorrows with some long-forgotten drinks next to him.
Maybe fate meant for every Black heir to be miserable. Regulus wouldn't be the exception.