to never forgetting
The train seat was uncommonly uncomfortable, he was extremely fidgety and anxious.
He couldn't stop thinking, what was he going to do now?, where was he going to spend the summers from now on? He could go to james’ he knew that but he did not want to overly abuse the kindness of the Potters, they already did enough for him.
Stupid Alphard. Stupid. Stupid. Why did he have to move to greece?
No, it wasn't Alphard’s fault. It was his stupid boyfriend's fault. Why did he have to live in fucking greece of all places.
To say he didn't take the news well was an understatement.
But deep down he knew that he couldnt blame Alphard, because he too would take the first opportunity to get as far as he could from their fucked up family.
He loved Alphard and he knew it was the best for him (but that didn’t mean that it hurt any less), because if his family ever found out he didn't even want to imagine what they would do to him, not because he was moving away, that was a common fact about Alphard, he couldn’t stay in the same place for too long, it was because he was moving away with a partner, a partner of the same sex.
And that was something his family wouldn’t condon. And the main reason why he would never marry.
He was too busy drowning in self loathing to notice the brown haired boy that had been seated next to him for the past 10 minutes.
“Are you alright?,” the boy asked him. He looked about his age and had a strange accent, almost welsh but not quite. And the prettiest eyes he had ever seen.
He must have looked at the boy with a confused face because the boy decided to explain his question. “It just looked like you were about to cry”
That was just awesome. Just when he came face to face with one of the prettiest boys he had ever seen in his 13 years of life, of course he looked like a madman who was just about to cry nevertheless.
And for some reason he couldn’t seem to get words out of his mouth, there was a knot in his throat and he realized that yes, he was about to cry.
And looking at the worry in the other boy's eyes made him want to cry even more.
So he didn’t even notice when the tears started running down his cheek, which started to turn red in embarrassment of the other boy watching him cry. He covered his eyes trying to make himself stop, but he couldn’t seem to do it.
And then he felt a palm rubbing circles on his back. He lifted his head to see the boy looking at him with a soothing smile on his face, and he noticed that the boy had dimples, no, not dimples, just one dimple on his left cheek.
“It's okay,” the boy assured him. “Are your parents around here?, your mum or dad?”
at that Sirius couldn't help but to let out a bitter laugh “thank God not, my mother would have a fit if she saw me crying.”
“Why?” the boy asked with confusion all over his pretty face. stop it! Not the moment.
“It's just, you know, not very manly”
“Bullshit, boys are allowed to cry, it's not a bad thing, it's okay to show emotion. we’re human.”
It surprised Sirius to hear the swear word leave the other boy's mouth. it just didn’t seem right, like it didn’t belong there, he looked too soft. He felt like those words were just too sharp, like a knife. And he was afraid that somehow they would cut all the softness out of the boy.
“I’m Remus Lupin by the way, and you are?” the boy asked, and Sirius realized that he had been looking too mesmerized at the boy's face.
“Sirius.” He extended his hand in form of greeting.
“no last name?” Remus took his hand and shaked it looking at it like it was something funny, which made Sirius blush again.
“no last name.” Sirius stated tightly.
“Ok” Remus said without questioning, and Sirius was grateful for that.
“You're traveling alone too or…?”
“No, with my parents, they are a few seats back,” Remus stated in that strange accent of his, which made Sirius even more curious about the boy.
“Where are you from?, I'm sorry, it's just I'm assuming Wales but your accent it's not quite right” He was dying to know everything about Remus, starting with that peculiar accent.
“Oh, I'm not welsh, I mean, i live there, and my dad is welsh but i was born in chile and lived there until i was 10” The look of confusion in Sirius’ face must have been obvious because Remus decided to elaborate.
“It's in South America,” Remus said with a kind smile on his face.
“Oh! So you're latino?”
“Yeah,” Remus was taking something out of his backpack
“Do you want some? they’re chilean pastries, my mum made them” He offered Sirius. It was a large fried dough, it looked like it had a knot at the center, with powdered sugar on top. Sirius tried it.
“This is really good, what is it called?”
“Calzones rotos, or broken underwear, or ripped, i'm not really sure”
That answer made Sirius laugh, which made him choke on the food on his mouth, making Remus laugh.
They talked a lot for the rest of the train ride, about friends, school, music, movies, Sirius asked Remus about chile and his grandparents which he found out lived there and made Remus go visit them every summer, Remus talked about his parents and Sirius about the Potters and Reggie, Remus didn't question why Sirius didn’t mention his biological parents and didn’t ask either. At one point Sirius asked what was Remus doing in london, at which Remus hesitated before answering that he was just doing some shopping and looking around, Sirius felt that wasn’t the whole truth but he wasn’t going to be meddling about in other people business, especially because Remus didn’t seem comfortable talking about it.
Just when the train was getting close to its next stop, Remus told him that it was where he had to get off, Sirius had the sudden urge to beg Remus to please stay a little longer, he was not ready to let him go just yet.
“I wish you could stay a little longer” Sirius voiced his thoughts
“I wish I could stay too,” Remus was fidgeting, pulling the sleeves of his sweater over his hands.
“But who knows? maybe we'll see each other again” Remus said, looking hopeful.
But hope was something Sirius had learned not to hold on to a long time ago. But he was willing to do it just this once, because maybe if he tried hard enough it would work.
“How do I know you will not forget about me until then?” Sirius asked
“I won’t.” Remus said solemnly
“How do I make sure of it?” Sirius had an idea of how to, but it honestly was a little crazy and he didn’t know if he had the courage needed to do it.
“I-” Remus wasn’t able to answer because Sirius was already talking again.
“Remus, have you ever kissed someone?” Sirius didn’t know where the sudden bravery had come from but he didn’t want to think about it too much, in fear that it would go away.
Remus seemed to have gone mute, so he just shook his head in answer.
“Good, me neither. That's how we’ll make sure to never forget about each other, because people always remember their first kiss, and we’ll be each other's first kisses.”
“Is that okay with you?” Sirius asked, with the sudden fear that he was scaring Remus away acting like a complete maniac.
Remus nodded, and Sirius couldn’t contain the smile on his face.
Sirius was just about to ask Remus if he could kiss him when Remus had already closed the distance between them, taking Sirius’ cheeks between both of his hands.
It wasn't a big kiss, it didn’t last more than 30 seconds, but Sirius felt like it had lasted an eternity, and he wished it would have never ended.
Their faces were still close and they were smiling to each other when the train came to a stop announcing that it had already reached Remus’ destination.
Remus gathered his things and stood up, “see you Sirius.” He said with a soft smile on his face, following which Sirius believed were his parents.
“I really hope so, Remus.”
For the first time Sirius spent the train ride back to his house with a smile on his face.