“It’s just…if it was him following Betsy, then we both know what he’s capable of now, don’t we?”
Carla’s words echo in Betsy’s mind the whole time she is in the shower, and getting dressed. She had been afraid before, but to hear Carla state it like that had made it even worse. She’d known Rob was a threat to her mum and Carla, but she hadn’t really taken it all that seriously, she’d been focused on her own life, and that it was a distant problem for someone else.
She hadn’t even fully thought that the break-in at the flat had been him, instead believing he’d been in Brighton. So, to see him today, and she was sure it was him, was…surreal. She’d seen photos of him in the news, but also, Carla had shown her old photos a few weeks ago, while she was recovering, and Betsy had been asking about Rob and how this all happened.
It had definitely been Rob. She only hopes that since he’s still here, they’ll catch him soon. Although, given how long it’s taken the police so far, she isn’t optimistic. There’s a pit in her stomach, it’s familiar. It’s how she initially felt right after her mum died. That strong, irreconcilable fear that Lisa is in danger, that Lisa will die, that she will be an orphan. It’s always present but it’s stronger now, like it was then.
She takes a deep breath. She can’t focus on any of that. No, she needs to try to force that all out of her mind, that’s why they’re having a night of mindless telly. She can do this.
Betsy emerges from her bedroom a short while later. She’s dressed in a cute matching set of pyjamas, and she is ready to try to forget this day ever happened.
It hadn’t started out all that great either, considering how she’d woken with quite the hangover after the party last night. She’d tried to get a smoothie to soothe her stomach, but had to ditch it when Rob had…no, she wasn’t going to think about that.
She closes the door to her bedroom softly behind her.
Sees her mum and Carla are sitting quietly on the sofa together. They’re directly beside each other—they always are these days—and Carla’s leaning into her mum’s chest, with her head resting there. They’re whispering to one another. Carla’s fidgeting with her mum’s hair, having released it from its bun at some point. She’s caressing it and, as much as Betsy doesn’t like to think about it, she does think it is kind of nice that someone’s looking after her mum again.
She considers them for just a moment. How often they’re happy. She never really sees them shout at one another, they rarely have conflict. She has seen her mum annoyed at Carla a couple times but it seems all Carla has to do is pat her head or kiss her cheek and it’s resolved. She really is DS Swoon now. It’s quite the change from how rigid and angry and unhappy her mother had been just months ago.
She smiles to herself about the nickname. She kind of loves that she and Carla have this little inside joke about her mum. That’s another area that’s changed. Her relationship with Carla. She had been so relieved to see Carla running up to her on the street, she’d thrown herself into her arms with abandon. She’d felt safe, comforted, cared for. She’d believed when Carla said things would be alright.
To be honest, she’s not exactly sure how she’d ended up in Kit’s arms, it had all been a bit of a blur, seeing Rob, running, and then bam, someone to help. But she’d seen Carla. Made the choice to turn into Carla. Would do it again. It brings a warm, fuzzy kind of feeling in her chest that she doesn’t exactly know how to describe.
She hadn’t let go for a long while though, and Carla hadn’t pulled away. She’d just held her there, and let her relax in her own time. Carla was always doing things like that—giving her space when she needed it. And, although she didn’t want to admit it, she also pushed her a little when she needed it. She trusted Carla, she isn’t exactly sure when that happened, but it has, and now, she’s grateful that they’re all here to spend the evening together.
Carla sees Betsy first and she shifts off Lisa immediately. It’s not that she cares that Besty sees them like that, she has many times. It’s that she wants to make Betsy the focus of their attention, fully supported. She pats the space between them that she’s just created. “Come here.” She says, in a way that she usually reserves for Lisa, it’s soft, it’s gentle, and it’s to ease the mind of this frazzled teen standing in front of her.
“Okayyyy…so,what’s for tea?” Betsy asks, plopping down on the sofa.
“Oh, I dunno, haven’t turned my mind to it yet.” Lisa answers.
“Well. I have just been chased by a murderer…” Betsy starts.
“Oh dear. Gonna milk this are we?”
“Mother…I could have been maimed.”
Lisa chuckles at that. “Well go on then, what is it you want?”
“If you say a kebab—” Carla cuts in and Lisa smiles.
“No, I don’t fancy them like she does.” Betsy retorts.
“Not sushi, I’m already going to have to suffer through MAFS.”
“You already agreed to watch it, mother, no take backs now.”
Lisa heavily sighs.
“Besides, I pick Chinese.” Betsy declares.
Lisa glances over at Carla. “That work for you?”
“Of course.” Carla says, one side of her lips curving into a smile.
“At least your taste in food is better than your taste in television.” Lisa replies.
“If I let you’s two have it your way, all we’d watch would be the news…” she says looking at Lisa “or police procedurals.” She finishes gesturing at Carla.
“Yes, and I cannot sit through another of those with your mam at the moment as it is.” Carla jumps in.
“Oi, what are you implying?” Lisa’s eyebrow raises to the challenge.
“Just that I’d have had a lot more enjoyment of Vigil, if you didn’t spend every other minute explaining in great detail why procedurally, none of that would have happened.”
Lisa sputters indignantly. “It was completely unrealistic! There were so many things that just never—”
“How could she possibly have had jurisdiction to investigate on a submarine,” Betsy mimics in Lisa’s voice. She makes eye contact with Carla and they’re both smirking.
“It’s not possible!” Lisa practically shouts. She’s not angry, she just thoroughly dislikes inaccurate police portrayals.
“It’s all just for a bit of fun and intrigue though, innit?” Carla says, trying to calm her.
Betsy pipes up then, still mimicking her mother’s voice. “It’s not that, it’s the damage to public expectation—” and she gets cut off because Lisa’s tickling her suddenly and she’s laughing and trying to wiggle away from her. “Mum! Stop it.”
“Serves you right for mocking your mother. I’m just saying, that there are protocols in place for a reason and some of the things they show these officers do can just completely undermine public confidence in the administra—"
“Alright, alright, don’t get your knickers in a twist, again.” Carla interjects. “I’m not saying I’ll never watch it with you, just that tonight’s a nice break.”
“You said you liked it!”
“Well I did like parts of it. And, I fancied that DS. Must have a thing for that lot or summat.” Carla says as she runs her hand through Lisa’s hair, soothing away the tension that’s building within her.
Lisa smiles a little at that, feels her indignation diffuse almost entirely through the touch and leans in to kiss Carla behind Betsy.
“Would you two get a room?” Betsy interjects, drawing their attention back to the fact they aren’t alone.
“Uh, I have a room. I have the whole flat actually.” Carla responds.
“Yes well, psychologically harming a child is still against the law in your own flat, isn’t it?” Betsy asks turning to her mum.
“Well, if I do recall correctly, you’re the one who is consistently telling me you aren’t a child, so which is it?”
“Does that mean you’re ready to admit I’m an adult then?” Besty retorts.
“If you’re such an adult, maybe you should be getting us tea then, yeah?” Lisa responds.
“Well, I would, but you know what she pays me?” Betsy deflects looking at Carla. “Basically working for free.”
“I will personally pay for it, if you two stop bickering and we can just get to the show.” Carla offers.
She loves watching Lisa and Betsy verbally spar, recognising it’s in their nature but she also knows that after the day they’ve had, it’s probably better for everyone if they can get to relaxing.
“Let me get my phone and get it sorted.” She says standing up. Lisa watches her get up with a soft smile on her face, and lets her gaze follow the brunette as she walks to the table to get it.
“You are so down bad. She’s steps away.” Betsy mutters.
“Down what?”
“Never mind. Boomer.”
It’s not long later that they’ve all got their plates full, and Betsy’s selecting the episode for them to watch.
“Right, so, let me get this sorted. I can’t remember what episode we finished up until.”
“So, these people…they get married and then what?” Carla asks.
“Hang on, have you never seen MAFS?” Betsy swings her eyes towards Carla. The opportunity of this being the first time to bring Carla into this world completely lighting up her face with delight.
“Well, I’ve heard of it. But I’ve never watched it.”
“Count yourself lucky you’ve made it this long without.” Lisa tells Carla.
“No. Carla, seriously, you’ve been missing out. We have so many series to catch you up on!” Betsy exclaims as Lisa falls back into the sofa groaning. Betsy turns back to her mother briefly. “She has to understand and there’s no better way than to just watch it all happen.”
Carla nods along.
“So, the way that it works is, there are these experts who decide on who to pair these people up with based off their personalities and stuff, and then, they have to live together like they are married for a bit. And then basically at the end of it, they decide if they’ll stay together and commit or if they say no.”
“And this actually works?”
“No.” Lisa responds. “They just say they will and then they break up.”
“Oh, sounds like I could’ve been a contestant then.” Carla says sarcastically taking a sip of water. Lisa’s eyes glance over to Carla’s but before she can say anything Betsy’s responding.
“That’s not true, mother. There’ve been a few couples. One of them even has a baby now. And, hey, they had their first lesbian couple get engaged last year.”
“Just proving that sexuality has nothing to do with intelligence.” Lisa answers. “It’s just so dumb. How could people just go into a marriage without any kind of planning, on nationwide television, thinking this is a good idea?”
“I imagine it’s the potential for love…or fame.” Carla answers.
“It’s stupid.”
“Romance still dead I see.” Carla answers joking to Lisa.
“Hey, I am dead romantic., that’s what I am.” Lisa says.
“I’m only messing.” Carla says, with a half-smile apologetically in Lisa’s direction. “I just think that you’re being too hard on the show. People want to find love, who cares how?”
“So, you’re saying you’d go on this show?”
“Well, I never said that.” Carla responds.
“I would.” Betsy says. “It seems fun!”
“I don’t think so young lady.” Lisa tells her, just as Carla says “I’d love to see that.”
They make eye contact for a moment. Lisa surprised, Carla smiling.
“What, you have to admit, it would make for good telly.” Carla explains.
“Nothing about this show is good telly. It’s all just people doing wild things for attention, in totally contrived situations that make absolutely no sense. I have no idea how people waste their lives watching any of this.” Lisa says, taking a sip of her own water and then placing it down emphatically.
A while later
“I mean if I were Hannah, I wouldn’t fancy this Stephen bloke either, he seems like a real ratbag.” Lisa says emphatically. “Hannah deserves so much better.”
“Oh, does someone have a little crush, darling?” Carla says with a big grin on her face.
“What? No! I just can’t understand how he is upset with her that she almost did something he just did to her. He said he didn’t want them to talk about things they discussed off camera. And then he does, but doesn’t want her to? And then got upset that she might? Peak entitled male behaviour.” Lisa says with a snort. “You know how I feel about that kind of thing.”
“He is easy on the eyes though.” Betsy says raising her eyebrows.
“You know what though, that don’t matter because scum is scum no matter how it looks.” Carla responds practically. “And your mam’s right, you can’t have double standards like that, they don’t work. Justice for Hannah!” Carla exclaims, smiling at Lisa.
“Spoiler alert: I think she’s kind of a ratbag too.” Betsy shrugs.
“I’ve not yet seen one of these people who isn’t.” Carla tells her in response.
“Do you think she’ll settle for him?” Lisa asks, genuinely distraught.
“I don’t know darling, but I think you’ll survive if she does.”
“I just can’t handle women accepting being treated like that by their partners. It’s so absurd. The experts really should be saying something about this, because he’s in the wrong, and I won’t hear otherwise.”
Carla smiles at how impassioned Lisa gets when it comes to men mistreating women. It’s something that Carla finds really endearing about her partner. How much she wants women to be treated properly, how staunchly she fights for it in her job, and even how slighted she feels just bearing witness to perceived injustice.
“I need a snack, do you guys fancy some chocolate?” Betsy asks them as she heads into the kitchen.
“Yes.” Lisa answers.
“I’ll steal some of hers.” Carla adds.
Lisa glances across the sofa smiling at Carla. “Just try it, Connor.”
“You can’t resist me, Swain.”
“We’ll see about that.”
Carla narrows her eyes. She loves a challenge. She makes a quick decision. “I’ll make it worth your while…” Carla trails off, letting her voice drop a little, so that Betsy couldn’t hear. Her voice dripping with syrup. “Maybe share some with me now…and we can share some whipped cream later?”
Lisa puzzles on what Carla’s offering.
“Like we did that day with the egg nog.” Carla clarifies.
Carla can see the moment Lisa realises. Oh. That kind of whipped cream. She can see the memories of exactly what they’d done with each other and the whipped cream all invading Lisa’s mind just by the glint in her eye.
“Whaddya say?” Carla asks.
“Could not possibly want to share my chocolate more.”
Betsy plops down just between them passing Lisa her chocolate. “Right, what’ve I missed?” She asks.
“Gosh, not a lot.” Carla answers. “That other couple, they seem to have it more figured out though.” She has no idea what’s happening on the show, she’s been too focused on flirting with Lisa (she has noticed that Lisa’s cheeks are turning a delicious tinge of pink ever since she brought her mind back to that particular memory), but she is also mindful that the evening is supposed to be about comforting Betsy.
“What couple?”
“I don’t remember their names.” Carla lies, but only partially. She has no idea what couple she’s talking about but truthfully, she doesn’t really remember anyone’s name in this show, and she’s not that emotionally invested. Not even compared to Lisa, who seems to have really gotten into it despite her initial protests.
“Was it Kieran and Kristina?”
“That sounds right.” Carla says with a nod.
“I think they’re better suited. I could see them going the whole way.” Betsy says as she takes a bite of chocolate.
Carla reaches around Betsy and slowly, without breaking eye contact with Lisa, grabs a piece of hers. Lisa bites her lip.
“Hard to know this early, isn’t it?” Carla responds. “Some of these people seem like they already hate each other and it’s only been days, right?” She glances back at Lisa, bringing the chocolate up to her mouth and takes a very slow bite. Lisa’s eyes do not leave her mouth the entire time.
“Yeah, I do question how the experts decide to put these people together for some reason, seriously, Mel…Paul…Charlene…what were you thinking?” Betsy asks.
“On a first name basis with them now, are we?” Carla teases her.
“Of course, I am! It’s already at series 9, this isn’t my first rodeo.” Betsy turns to Lisa. “Why are you so quiet? You’re not even eating your chocolate.”
“Um, no reason. Just listening to you two.” Lisa answers, looking at Betsy but sneaking a glance at Carla, who she knows has not stopped looking at her.
“What do you reckon? Any of them stay together?” Betsy says as she grabs a cushion, placing it on Carla’s lap and stretches out then, putting her feet on her mum’s lap, throwing a blanket over top of herself.
Carla glances across the sofa at Lisa. She knows that whatever ideas or thoughts they’d had about any kind of…dessert…would have to wait until later. But she also knows (because her memory serves her well) it would be absolutely worth the wait, and also, in the meantime she still got to enjoy Lisa flustered.
She turns her attention back to Betsy. “Hard to say, I’ve only just started watching.”
Another episode later, they’re still on the sofa. Betsy’s seemingly fallen asleep on Carla’s lap, or at least breathing deeply like she might be.
Lisa leans forward and quietly turns the television off. She turns to Carla.
“What do we do about her?” Carla whispers to Lisa.
“I’m awake.” Betsy responds rubbing at her eyes, voice a little groggy.
“Shall we go to bed?” Lisa asks everyone as Carla yawns.
“I think so.”
“Will you be alright sweetheart?” Lisa asks Betsy as her daughter sits up and puts her feet down on the floor. She’s a little worried for Betsy to be alone. She isn’t sure how Carla would feel about her sleeping with them, hadn’t had a chance to talk to her about it, mention that it’s something Betsy had done when she was younger when she felt scared or frightened. Carla isn’t her mother so Lisa realises it could definitely pose a bit of a challenge to be comfortable with that level of…presence in your bed.
“I’ll be fine.” Betsy responds.
“You can always sleep in with us, if you like.” Carla offers as she gets up off the sofa. She doesn’t even look at Lisa, doesn’t even give her offer much thought, just says what seems to her to be an obvious suggestion.
Lisa manages to keeps her mouth closed to hide her surprise but it’s still present. It’s like Carla had just read her mind.
“Thanks, but, I think I’ll be okay.” Betsy says. “I am basically an adult after all.”
“Well, open offer.”
“Thanks.” Betsy says, and she goes in to do her nightly routine, brushing her teeth and readying for bed.
Carla turns back to Lisa. “Didn’t you mention going to bed? What?” She asks, noticing that Lisa hasn’t moved from the sofa.
“Thank you. For tonight, for everything. You’re so good to us both.”
“I’ve hardly done anything, that show wasn’t so bad.”
“No, not that. Being here, getting her Chinese because she wants it, spending time with us. Inviting her to sleep with us if she needs to, you just…Betsy’s so lucky to have someone like you in her life.” Lisa says as she finds her footing both figuratively and literally, getting up to step into Carla’s space.
She places both hands gently at Carla’s waist, pulling her in closer to her body so she can lean up and place a soft kiss on her lips. “And I’m even more lucky,” she practically purrs into the kiss.
“Yes well, as much as I’d like to explore you getting luckier, I do think with the hint of Betsy maybe coming in at any point we should table the whipping cream for a different night.”
“Don’t worry, I won’t forget about it. Besides, you’re still recovering.”
“I know, but I am starting to feel better. And anyway, I could see you thinking about it all night. Don’t think I didn’t see those glances, missus. And the very real flush of your cheeks.” She teases as she brushes the back of her index finger over one of Lisa’s cheeks.
“Well, I can hardly be blamed for that, the things you did with your tongue…” Lisa trails off as Carla smiles broadly, leaning down to kiss her again.
“Soon, sweetheart. For now, let’s get ready for bed. It’s been a long day.”
Carla holds Lisa’s hand as she guides them both into the bedroom and then into her en suite.
It’s become a very well-established routine for them. The order that they ready for bed. A sychronised dance almost, when Lisa leans forward to spit out her toothpaste, Carla leans back, and vice versa. It’s like they know the steps without ever having formally learned them. It brings a slight ache to Lisa’s chest that they have this level of comfort and familiarity.
They change into pyjamas—sometimes they wear them, sometimes they don’t—but given Betsy’s emotional state, they both agree that with the potential of her joining them, it is for the best.
They both then slip into bed, and through unspoken agreement, find their way into each other’s arms. For tonight, Lisa has her head resting on Carla’s chest.
“Do you think she’ll be alright?”
“Who, Hannah or Betsy?” Carla jokes.
“Oh, you’re so funny.”
“I think she’ll be fine. Betsy’s a strong girl, and while it’s a shame she’s had to deal with so much at such a young age, it has built resiliency. And hey, at least we probably won’t have to worry if she’s in her bed tomorrow morning.”
Lisa chuckles and then sighs, grabbing one of Carla’s hands and running her fingers through Carla’s up and down. She loves the feel of their hands grasping on to one another. “And you’re sure you’re okay about Rob? I meant what I said you know, that it would be okay if you were upset about him.”
“Well, I won’t lie, I am worried he might die. But at the same time, I am more worried about you and Betsy. I grew up with Rob, and there’s a part of me who will always love him for who he was, but that doesn’t mean I don’t see what he’s become now, and fear for the people I love because of it.”
Lisa lets it land that Carla’s just basically admitted to loving her and Betsy both. She knew that based off Carla’s actions, but the fact she said it brings a soft glow inside her.
“Well, hopefully, he just collapses and is found unconscious and we can get him treatment and back to jail without any harm to anyone else.”
“Do you think they’d charge him with additional crimes?”
“Well, there are any number of charges he could face, he attacked the prison guard at the hospital, he held you against your will, he assaulted me. But either way, it won’t matter because he won’t ever get out again.”
“Do you think…if he’s caught alive…that if he told them what happened…I’d face charges? Or what if he tells them about your deal?”
“It will be our word against his, and he’s the one who’s a convicted murderer, and on the run from police. I don’t think we have much to worry about there, darling, don’t worry. I will make sure of it. I will handle it for us.”
Carla lets that sink in. She believes Lisa, she knows she means what she says, has shown it with her actions in the past. When Lisa had walked into that abandoned building right after Carla pushed Rob, she hadn’t hesitated to take charge of the situation, and she had backed Carla up, and never revealed what had actually happened.
“You know, never really considered all the perks to dating a local copper. Can’t believe I haven’t given it a go ages ago.”
“Oh, really? And do these perks make up for being unable to enjoy the third series of Vigil once it comes out?”
“’Course it does! I can just watch it without you.” Carla says as Lisa shifts and begins tickling her, and soon they’re both laughing and out of breath.
“I love you,” Carla says with her heart thumping and a big smile on her face. “I wouldn’t change a single thing about you, and I will happily watch every police procedural with you. Besides, seeing you all bothered about the accuracy…it’s kinda hot.”
“Oh, really? Well, I love you too, and I’d love to hear more about this ‘kinda hot’ business.” Lisa says, her face flushed from their play, but also with a hint of intrigue of her own in her voice.
She slides up Carla’s body and pulls her into a warm kiss.
“Bit more of a shower than a teller, me.”
“Then show away.” Lisa says with a faint smile on her face and a glint in her eye.
So she does.