Cardigan
A few months after confessing to each other, and the lost hope that Reprifors would be the key to helping Anne, you and Sebastian were still searching for a cure, together now. You went through every charm and spell in the books available to you, and the weekends you used to share for bonding and hanging out had begun to turn into more research sessions, and you noticed how Sebastian had become more absorbed into helping Anne, and it felt like you were going back in time to when he would avoid you. But he wasn’t avoiding you to get away from you, he promised that he wouldn’t hide away from you. But Anne was only getting worse, and you were back to square one.
You sat with Ominis, going over the lessons you shared that day, when you brought up your concerns. Ominis had noticed that Sebastian was missing a lot, and that he wasn’t just avoiding you. You furrowed your brow as you turned the page, lost in thought as to what Sebastian was doing. Sebastian, on the other hand, was sneaking around the restricted section of the library, searching for a book he had seen the night before. He evaded the wandering ghosts and the librarian, reaching for the bookshelf. He breathed out a small breath, the book grasped in his hands. Quickly, he made his way out of the library, and headed to an abandoned room, closing the door quietly behind him. Opening the book, his eyes grew dark, tracing the words on the pages and muttering to himself, the pages seemingly oozing with dark magic.
Sebastian didn’t join you and Ominis for supper, which caused you to worry. You excused yourself and walked the halls, searching for any sign of the brunette. You came across Poppy, who had been walking opposite you with a book about Hippogriffs in her hand. “Hey, Poppy!” You greeted, walking over to her. Poppy smiled at you, closing the book. “Hey! What are you up to?” You explained to her that you were searching for Sebastian, who didn’t show up to supper. Poppy furrowed her brow as she thought back to when she last saw him, “I’m pretty sure I watched him walk into one of the forbidden room up the hall, but I’m not sure which one.” You thanked her and began walking down the hall, checking different rooms for Sebastian. When you made it to the third door, you creaked it open slowly, the sound of someone muttering on the other side making you cautious. You opened it wide enough to pass through and closed it quietly. Sebastian sat in the center of the room, book in one hand and wand in the other, talking to himself. You took a step forward, trying to figure out what it was you were looking at. The cover of the book looked like the ones from the restricted section of the library, and you could see a green haze faintly wrapped around the book and up Sebastian’s arm. Your eyes widened as you realized what the book was about, and quickly made your way to the center of the room with Sebastian.
“Sebastian, what on Earth are you doing?” You questioned, standing in front of him, horror painting your face. Sebastian broke from his trance, slightly confused as he looked up at you. “What are you doing here?” He asked, closing the book, and standing up, fixing his robes. You looked at him in disbelief, “What am I doing here? What are you doing?” You asked, trying to be calm. Sebastian looked down at the book and back up at you, still puzzled. “I might have found a way to actually help Anne. It’s our last hope!” He defended himself, slightly angry that you would even question his methods. You raised both eyebrows and frowned, “Our last hope? Sebastian, that’s Dark Magic!” Sebastian shook his head as he headed for the door, “Be quiet, no one was supposed to know. Now, come on, we have to go.” You stood there, shocked at his blatant disregard for the way he was going about things, staring at the back of his head. Sebastian stood at the door, waiting to hear you walk up behind him. “Let’s go.”
You spoke to Ominis about what you had witnessed, and Ominis’ face fell in concern and worry. “This isn’t good, does he know what could happen if he’s caught?” You shook your head, dropping into an empty chair in front of the fire. “What do we do?” You asked, rubbing your temples. Ominis thought hard, trying to find the best way to go about getting Sebastian to stop. “Bring him here, we need to talk to him.” You did just that, making your way to Sebastian, who just walked into the common room. “Sebastian,” You started. “We need to talk.”
“Sebastian, you know the dangers of Dark Magic! You could be expelled!” Ominis said, moving a chair to sit in front of Sebastian, who only scoffed in response. “You could go to Azkaban!” You chimed in, pleading with Sebastian to listen. He raised an eyebrow, glaring at the two of you. “It’s the only way. Nothing else works. You understand that, yeah?” Ominis shook his head, standing up and pacing. “I can’t stand by you in this situation. It’s wrong and dangerous.” Sebastian stared at you now, waiting for your response. You couldn’t speak, unsure what to say. Sebastian took your silence as an answer, and stood up, walking out of the commons. “I have to stop him, who knows what he’ll do.” You said, getting up from your seat and chasing after him.
You followed him to the lake and walked onto the dock. “Sebastian, you have to understand. We-“ “it’s like I don’t even know you! You were always ready to help Anne, but now you won’t?” He interrupted you, eyes dark as he paced around. You furrowed your brows, “I do! But this just isn’t the way to go!” Sebastian glared daggers at you, and you realized that what you said just placed you on Ominis’ side. “Do you even care anymore?” He shouted, gesturing around. You nodded, “I do care! But it’s wrong! Do you know what those kinds of spells could do to someone?” Sebastian scoffed, “Of course I do! I’ve been reading through them for weeks now!” You felt tears prick at your eyes, trying to fight them back, you continued. “I only want what’s best for you, Sebastian.” You said, quietly. Sebastian had his back to you, staring into the depths of the lake. He looked over his shoulder at you, before moving to leave. You tried to follow him, stopping in your tracks as you heard him mutter, “Maybe the best thing for me is for you to leave.”
You froze, watching Sebastian as he walked away, not turning back. You couldn’t stop the tears falling from your eyes as his words played in your head. You had just lost the person you cared for the most; you felt your body shake with sobs as you slowly dropped to the ground. Maybe you were wrong. Perhaps it was the only way to save Anne. But it was still wrong, right? You sat there for a long time, looking into the lakes as your tears dropped and made ripples on its surface. After all you went through, from meeting as kids to Anne being cursed, from finally expressing your feelings and still working on a way to help her, it was all over. The sky grew dark as time passed, your eyes stung from the cold that the night brought, and your cheeks were stained. Ominis had left the commons after an hour or so, noticing that only Sebastian had come back. He found you, arms wrapped around your legs as you sat at the edge of the dock, and sat next to you. You sobbed harder this time, trying to tell Ominis what had happened. He tried his best to comfort you, promising that the two of you would find a way to bring him back. He knew just how much you were going through, having been there the whole time you were battling those original feelings. After a while, the two of you walked back to the castle and back to your house, and you trudged up to your dorm.
Weeks had passed, and Sebastian didn’t even utter a word to you. You began to feel like you were the bad guy, the one who was in the wrong. You beat yourself up over it, silently. You refused to do anything that wasn’t on your schedule, and only ate a little before returning to your dorm to read through your schoolbooks. Ominis had begun to worry about you, seeing how you were becoming like a ghost in the castle. You didn’t participate in class anymore, sitting alone and quietly doing your work, distancing yourself away from everyone. You opened your charms book, flipping through the pages to reach the healing spells, taking out a quill to continue your study. You needed to find a way to help Anne, one that didn’t include dark magic, and had hoped that you could tweak the spells to have more of an impact. You told yourself that everything you were doing was best for everyone, and began to believe that you were the cause of all of this.
That night when you woke up in the middle of the night, going downstairs to get a drink, the noises you heard. That was Mr. Sallow’s house being raided, and Anne being cursed. If you had done something then, instead of heading back to bed, Anne wouldn’t be in agony all the time. Maybe, instead, you would be the one cursed, and Sebastian would have his sister back. That mentality broke you even more, and you began to not care what you did as long as it got you closer to a safer cure, even if that meant spending the hours you should have been sleeping to study, skipping meals to grab a new book to look through, even not paying attention in most of your classes just to work on your own formula.
Ominis began to scold Sebastian, telling him that what he was doing was wrong, and how he was incredibly rude to you. Sebastian would only brush him off, muttering “It’s for Anne.” Ominis’ concern for you had begun to increase when he watched you in potions, barely grabbing the right ingredient for you potion and placing it into the cauldron. Some days, you wouldn’t even show up to the dining hall, and he had to sneak food out for you and try to get you to eat. He mentioned this to Sebastian, who stayed quiet about the matter. He kept looking into Dark Magic to find a way to help his sister, but he was met with one dead-end after the other. He began to believe that, maybe, the Dark Arts would not help him. But if that wasn’t the way to go, then what was?
Sebastian walked into the greenhouse, taking his seat next to Ominis. He looked around, noticing that you hadn’t shown up yet, and frowned. His gut was telling him that it was his fault that you had secluded yourself from everyone. It wasn’t his gut that old him that, of course, Ominis had made that fairly clear to Sebastian after the first week, but he was too absorbed in the Dark Arts to really care. But now, after he still hadn’t found what he was looking for, he slowly stopped looking at the books, and had put all but one back. It was as if a fog had been living in his mind, as he started to recognize faces and voices again.
Later that day, while Sebastian was walking down the dirt path to the creature pen, he was discussing with Ominis how he felt after the whole ordeal, breathing in the fresh air, and enjoying the breeze. Ominis shook his head, “We tried to tell you, Sebastian. It does things to people.” Sebastian looked down and furrowed his brows, while Ominis continued. “They were right, you know.” Sebastian looked up, confused. “They told you that it was dangerous. What would have happened if you were put away?” Sebastian thought hard about the question, Anne’s face appearing. “I wouldn’t be able to see Anne ever again.” He whispered. Ominis nodded, stepping over a rock. “Exactly, we only wanted you to be safe, and still able to see your sister. It was never about anything else.”
The two had made it to the pen, looking for the professor. Poppy’s small figure ran past them and to one of the gates, yelling at a group of students that had gathered around it. Sebastian couldn’t quite make out what they were saying, and moved closer. Poppy’s voice was stressed as she told the boys to leave the creatures alone; they were poking their wands in and prodding the small creatures in the head, aggravating them. “Stop it!” Poppy yelled, grabbing the sleeve of one of the boys. Another figure rushed by Sebastian, and he recognized it, you. You walked up behind Poppy, glaring at the boys. “You heard her, leave them alone.” You said, your face void of any emotion but anger and annoyance. The leader of the group scoffed, shoving his wand into the pen again. He looked up at you, grinning. “What are you going to do about it, hm?” You narrowed your gaze as you grabbed Poppy, moving her away from the pen and the boy and placed her behind you. In the corner of your eye, you saw the small creature grab hold of the wand with its sharp, needle like claws, and began to climb up it. The boy didn’t notice and pulled his wand back up and tried to point it at you. He was met with the angry chittering of the creature on the tip of his wand, ready to pounce on his face. Panicking, he threw his wand at you, and you tried to grab the little fellow before he hit the ground. Frightened and angry, not knowing that you didn’t mean it any harm, it lashed out and scratched at your neck and hands, leaving a bunch of thin, deep cuts all over. You hissed in pain but kept your composure as you held the creature gently, leaning over the pen to place it back on the ground to be with his group. You picked up the wand and handed it back to the boy, who stared in horror and guilt and blood started to soak your collar and sleeves. “Don’t do it again.” You said, glaring into his eyes. He nodded and ran off with his friends.
You heard Poppy gasp and move to stand in front of you, eyes wide as she saw all the cuts you had received. “You’re bleeding!” She shouted, snapping Sebastian out of his trance and rushing over with Ominis. The professor was already rushing over, walking over only to see the boy throw the creature at you. You shrugged in response, twitching slightly at the pain. “You need to go to the infirmary now! Those cuts on your neck look deep, you could bleed out.” The professor said, looking at the wounds to see just how bad they were. You nodded slightly, wincing as you began to walk up the hill again. The professor looked worried and looked over at Sebastian and Ominis. “I’m afraid they wont make it to the infirmary alone, can one of you go with them?” They asked, and Sebastian quickly nodded and raced after you.
“Wait! Let me help you.” Sebastian shouted as he hurried to your side. You shrugged him off and tried to walk faster, staggering a bit. You pressed a hand to your neck, noticing that it hadn’t stopped bleeding, nor did the cuts on your arms. Sebastian kept following you, desperate to get you to the infirmary as soon as possible. “I don’t need any help.” You said, narrowing your gaze at the castle, which began to get blurry. “But you do need help! You’re bleeding out!” Sebastian tried to reason, becoming frustrated at your stubbornness. Was he like this too, when you tried to talk him out of using the Dark Arts? “I can help myself. Now go away.” You kept walking, blinking away at the blur that had begun to take over your vision. Sebastian ran ahead of you, unsure what to do. He couldn’t stop you; you would bleed out as he tried to explain himself, but if you kept refusing his help, who knows how far you’d get before dropping to the ground. “Look, I’m sorry, for everything.” He started, trying to grab your arm and drag you to the door. You kept your gaze narrowed, not responding. “You were right, I shouldn’t have looked into the books! I thought it was the only way to help Anne, but it wasn’t. I realized that you were looking out for me, and Ominis and Anne. I didn’t care what happened if I got caught, I wasn’t thinking. But you were!” He pleaded with you as he continued to pull you to the doors, your foot dragging behind you and your breathing becoming ragged. He had no choice but to pick you up, whether you wanted his help or not. Lifting you up, he began to quickly walk to the door. “I’m so sorry. You were right about the magic changing people, I have no idea what I was thinking. It was selfish of me to do something like that, and even more selfish of me to say those things to you.” He pushed his shoulder into the door, walking through and down the hall. “I never meant to hurt you, I swear. It was dumb of me to think that you didn’t want to help Anne, I’m sorry.” Tears swelled in his eyes as he hurried down another hall, the infirmary near the end. “I swear, I will make it up to you. I will never let you down again.”
He slammed open the door and shouted into the room for help. A nurse was by his side immediately, guiding him to a bed to put you in. She checked you over quickly, noting that you were still conscious, barely. Sebastian watched anxiously as she ran to grab bandages and ointments, placing them on a tray and grabbing her wand. She used a simple spell to stop the bleeding, but couldn’t close up your wounds. She grabbed the ointment and a cotton pad, dabbing the substances onto your cuts. You hissed in pain, the evident alcohol mixed in the solution burning like hot lava. She asked Sebastian to hold your arm still so she could do the same there, and he grabbed your forearm in one and hand in the other, holding your sleeve up and squeezing your hand. Once again you hissed in pain, watching as the magical ointment bubbled and snuck into the open cuts. Afterwards, she wrapped you up, giving you a final check and handing you some of the ointment and bandages for when you needed them. You thanked her and walked out with Sebastian.
“You’re going to need help dressing those wounds.” Sebastian said matter-of-factly. A small smile tugged at your lips as you scoffed. “I suppose they are. Guess I’ll ask Ominis to help me out.” “Oh, come on!” You turned to Sebastian, seriousness now taking over your smile. “Did you mean what you said?” Sebastian looked down, remembering how you had been conscious the whole time he was rambling. “Yes. Of course.” You nodded, grabbing his sleeve and walking off to the common room. “You’ll have to redeem yourself; you know.” Sebastian nodded and smiled as he walked with you.
With the help of Ominis, you helped Sebastian get over what hold the Dark Arts had on him, and he returned to being himself, the same one you had loved for lord knows how long. You showed him the theories you had come up with and how you wanted to try to tweak the spells to make them stronger, and Sebastian began to find hope again. Two weeks later, he brought you back to the lake where he left you, the bright sun shining down on the two of them. “I hope you can forgive me, for everything.” He said, looking out at the water. You hummed in response, leaning your head on his shoulder. “I love you too.” “I didn’t even get to say it!” “I knew what you meant.”