Remembering the Past
The months after Cedric's death was not easy for Harry. That certain day seemed to have changed something in him for good, his mind was somewhere else most of the time and Hermione could only guess that he was blaming himself. If Harry hadn't asked him to touch the cup together, Cedric never would've found himself in that graveyard. That was the root of his guilt. "Kill the spare," the dark lord had said. He was a spare, just another boy on his way to his real target, Harry.
Hermione's parents knew enough of Voldemort that when she told them he was back, they glanced at each other worryingly. She didn't tell them all the truth, they only knew that he was a bad wizard and he hurt people in his time. The murder of Harry's parents, Ginny's possession or Cedric's death would be more than enough to lock her in her room just like the Dursleys did to Harry. Thankfully, they still believed Hogwarts was one of the most secure places in the Wizarding World while Hermione herself wasn't even that sure anymore.
Hermione and Ron had been chosen as the new Gryffindor prefects this year and although she wouldn't openly say that to Ron, she expected it to be Harry, not him. He was as shocked as everyone else, but the pride of being a prefect overtook that shock quickly.
When Harry stood on trial before the Wizengamot, he was facing ridiculous crimes that he didn't commit and was about to be expelled just because he used the Patronus charm to protect himself and his undeserving cousin. Dumbledore came to his rescue and supported him when he claimed that Voldemort was back. Yet, after the trial, Dumbledore was ignoring him. It bothered Harry; he wanted to speak to him and he constantly avoided Harry. Harry thought that he had done something wrong or he was simply punishing him for using magic outside of school.
"Have you got your badge?" Mrs. Weasley yelled out to Ron from the kitchen as he hurried towards the front door.
"Yes, mum. I've got it." He sighed and rolled his eyes. Of course, he had it. Ever since the day, he received his badge; he couldn't take his eyes off it. He had pinned it to his sweater and whenever he looked slightly down, he was getting distracted by how shiny it looked. It was going to take a long time to adjust.
"We're going to be late!" Mr. Weasley yelled out, holding a baby blue teacup in his hands. They gathered their belongings, including luggage and suitcases. The portkey started to vibrate, signalling its time. They hold onto their belongings and put their fingers on it. As the air around them moved, the teacup began to vibrate more violently, the trio and Ginny closed their eyes. The older ones were used to it by now, but that wasn't the case for the younger ones. They couldn't land on their feet yet.
Hermione and Harry boarded the train after saying their goodbyes. Ron was attempting to break free from his mother's kisses. Ever since the day he got the letter, she was pampering him up with her attention. Although he appreciated the interest, he just wanted to get on his train before he was too late. He didn't want to live anything like third year again.
Ron and Harry were talking about quidditch again and as though Hermione had her book in her hands, she was casually listening to them. Slytherin and Ravenclaw had tied in the quidditch finals the previous year. Gryffindors were not bothered about the outcome, although they were relieved that Slytherin did not win.
"I wonder if Krum will be playing this year?" Ron murmured, turning to enjoy his chocolate after a brief glance at Hermione.
"Yes, he mentioned he'd been working out a lot recently," Hermione replied as she turned the page.
"Are you two still," Ron sat up straight, "talking?"
Hermione's eyes darted briefly to the letter in her bag. "Occasionally..." Ron was still waiting for her to continue and she cleared her throat. "He wished good luck for the both of us!"
Ron blinked in confusion. "What do you mean both of us?"
"For being the new prefects of Gryffindor," she looked at the people passing by their door. "Speaking of prefects, we are supposed to go to the prefect compartment," she said awkwardly. "We'll be back soon," she looked at Harry.
Harry shook his head. "Don't worry about me, it's okay. I wanted to sleep anyway,"
Ron met Hermione's eyes and said 'okay' before leaving their compartment. Only the Hufflepuff prefects and a few sixth and seventh-year prefects were present when they entered the compartment. This place was definitely larger than theirs. The centre of the room was dominated by a large circular table. That's where they would gather before heading to Hogwarts.
Hermione sat at the table, greeting the other prefects silently. Ron was already by the eating area getting biscuits and tea as if he had been here many times before. He placed a cup in front of her and sat down. The Hufflepuff prefects had a silent conversation before they decided to join them.
The silence was starting to get annoying when the sound of the door creaking caught all the attention. The room became quieter than it had been when the door opened, revealing the two Slytherin students. Not just any students but the worst boy and girl in Hogwarts.
Draco made such brief eye contact with Hermione that she would've missed it if she wasn't staring at him already. Pansy scoffed at them and yanked on the chair. She took a seat and waited for Draco to join her, but Draco was distracted by the tea in front of Hermione and Ron. He glanced behind them and went over to the food and beverage stand.
The sound of him pouring the water was the first thing that broke the silence. Hermione watched around the room, averting her gaze from Pansy in particular. They wouldn't stop bickering even if it was just for a second. It was best to avoid the conflict and start the new year with a clean slate.
Of course, Hermione was the only one who had such a thought. Pansy thanked Draco for the tea he had given her and took a loud sip while looking at them. They seemed like they could be in a relationship, and it wasn't just Hermione, everyone was speculating on it. Also, witnessing Draco Malfoy offer someone something out of goodwill couldn't possibly be real. A relationship seemed like the only answer.
"We all know you had to be here," Pansy said, pointing her teaspoon at Hermione then turning it to Ron. "However, I'm curious as to whose smart idea it was to choose you."
"The same one who chose you apparently," Ron squinted.
"Ow! You almost hurt my feelings, Weasley!" She laughed. "Obviously, I would be the prefect of Slytherin. There was never a better option," she smirked and added a cube of sugar into her tea.
Hermione knew it was best to remain silent, but Pansy was as annoying as anyone could be. Hermione couldn't just sit there and do nothing. "I can think of at least ten more people," she sighed, "but who am I to question the Headmaster's choices?“
Draco and Pansy both raised their heads at the same time. Pansy bit her lower lip and irritatedly glared at Hermione. She cast a peek towards Draco, expecting him to intervene, but all he did was blow on his tea. The girl pressed her lips together and inhaled deeply through her nose.
"Hey, Granger." A little grin appeared on her face. "I guess we'll spend more time together from now on," Hermione raised one eyebrow and Pansy continued, "but now that your boyfriend isn't here, I doubt you will join us at our table anymore."
"What?" Ron turned to look at Hermione.
"It wasn't a big deal—"
"It certainly was for us, right Draco?" He nodded taking another sip. Pansy redirected her focus to Ron. "We couldn't believe our eyes, Weasley. She told us that we could get extra points if we wrote some stupid paper. I thought she was being all nice and cute for Krum, but she had the audacity to call us her new friends as well, can you believe that?"
Hermione stared at the brunette, ignoring both the disbelief on Ron's face and the thoughtful look in Malfoy's eyes. Pansy was dead set on getting off on the wrong foot. "I was definitely foolish in assuming you could act your age for a change, but I've learned my lesson now."
"HEY!" Pansy jumped to her feet.
The door opened once again and the Head Boy and Girl watched the room carefully. "Is there a problem?" Roger Davies asked. He was a Ravenclaw in his seventh year and the quidditch captain, but Hermione doubted he'd continue being a captain this year. Being a Head Boy meant a lot of responsibilities. Hermione was only a prefect compared to them, and she knew it was going to take a lot of her time.
Alicia Spinnet, the Head Girl, was standing next to him. If Hermione hadn't known Alicia, she would've assumed that Dumbledore chose the ones who played Quidditch, but she simply was the best candidate in her year to be the head girl. Hermione was proud of her fellow Gryffindor.
"No," Pansy muttered and sat back down.
Ravenclaw prefects also joined them and Alicia observed them all with a furrowing brow. "We do not care about your house, your past, your arguments or your background. Each of you were selected for a reason and I trust the Headmaster on that. Whatever those reasons are.“
The air suddenly became serious as she sent daggers to them all. Pansy shifted on her chair uncomfortably, the rest of them glancing at each other in confusion and uneasiness.
"That means, you will be doing everything we ask and act as expected from the prefects. Am I clear?" Roger asked them all, but he was looking at Pansy every other second.
They all nodded and listened as the Head Girl and Boy gave them a brief informative speech about their responsibilities and capabilities. The older prefects came in, but they already knew everything and didn't really listen. They were more focused on their friends who'd be joining them soon.
They were allowed to take points from the houses, but they could not take points from other prefects. They could also issue detentions but later they would have to report to the Head Boy or Girl as to why they gave someone detention. They were going to patrol the hallways after curfew to ensure that other students were not out of their dorms. They had to be especially cautious with first years because they had a habit of getting lost around the castle. In case of an emergency, it was up to them to lead the students. They were expected to complete these tasks on a regular basis.
They had to act as role models around the others and set good examples. Hermione doubted Malfoy or Pansy could actually do that, but she hoped that they would at least take their duties seriously. She still had no idea why they were selected but she believed Dumbledore must have had a good reason.
"You'll be patrolling in pairs, whether it is with your housemate or not isn't certain yet," Alicia said and noticed the prefects in front of her glancing at each other. "Even if it is, it doesn't change anything. It might actually be better than you expected."
Although no one else noticed Malfoy's scowl and his jutted chin, Hermione was certain he did it on purpose to draw attention to himself. She didn't want to spend time with him either but she wouldn't show her dissatisfaction like that in front of everyone. She shifted her gaze to the Head Boy and Girl.
After the introduction for their duties was over, Hermione tapped on Ron's arm and headed to the door. After leaving the compartment in a hurry, they reached their side and found Harry eating a sandwich. His eyes brightened upon seeing them but slowly diminished. "What happened? Were you two running?" He chuckled.
Hermione and Ron looked at each other before Ron moved forward and sat across from him. "Sort of,"
Hermione sighed when Harry looked at her for an answer. "We've just met the other prefects,"
"And?"
"It certainly doesn't make sense, but Dumbledore must've—"
"It's Malfoy!" Ron cut in and avoided Hermione's eyes specifically, knowing how much she hated being interrupted.
"What?" Harry looked at Hermione for confirmation and she nodded, closing her eyes.
"I know! And Pansy Parkinson, too. The worst two, if you ask me. I don't know what Dumbledore was thinking about, but they definitely don't set good examples to be prefects."
—
Hermione was trying to adjust to her newly added responsibilities while trying to maintain a cordial relationship with the other prefects. Hufflepuffs were okay, they both didn't talk much but were diligent and disciplined. To be honest, she wouldn't ask for anything more. Ravenclaws were also fine, Hermione was having short conversations with them about their classes and the history of magic when the hallways were clear. Slytherins were, well, Slytherins. They either never talked or just waited for it to be over. Pansy was deliberately being late and putting Hermione in a bad spot, too. She wouldn't even warn the students who were out after curve and Hermione did all the work. Malfoy on the other hand was quieter than she expected him to be. He was trying to make it as fast as possible and be done with it. She was glad at least he was completing his tasks when he was with her because whenever she saw him or Pansy, they never acted like prefects and even abused their power.
Hermione couldn't really say she made new friendships, but she was determined not to let it bother her. It had only been a few weeks of classes and she was going to work with them until they graduated. She had started with the Ravenclaws and worked from there. It wasn't long before they invited her over for study sessions and Hermione quickly met more Ravenclaws. It turned out that she had a lot to talk about with the half-blood Hufflepuffs and soon began to share her favourite films and books with them. They recommended each other cool spots in muggle London and even promised to meet there soon. In the meantime, she had learned to tolerate Slytherins and even sparked up a few conversations.
"Is it you again?" Draco hung his head low.
Hermione looked him up and down with a criticising look. "Don't you know the schedule already?" She didn't particularly wait for a response. "Tuesday one week and Friday the other. We have the same classes both of those days, you should remember.“
He stood before her, hands in his pockets as he met her glare. "You can't expect me to keep track of every one of you I have to waste time with."
"Waste time? You think this is wasting time??" She sighed and rubbed the bridge of her nose.
"Isn't it? Be honest with me, I'm sure you'd prefer to spend your evenings with other people doing other things that you do."
Yes. Instead of counting the minutes with him, she wished she was with her friends. It didn't matter what they would do; just chatting with them was enough for her to enjoy herself. Malfoy would constantly whine about everything like a child. So yes, he was right for once, but she was too proud to admit that to him.
He interrupted her thoughts with a sigh. "Seriously, Granger. Don't tell me that we're not wasting our time here. People don't work together well when they don't like each other."
"You don't have to like someone to work with them. Stop making excuses for not completing your tasks. You don't even check the hallways, I'm doing all the work here!" She pointed her finger to her chest.
He slapped his forehead in frustration. "That's what I'm trying to say! There's no one out, when was the last time you warned some first years to go inside? Even if they don't know the whole school, they are aware that strolling around the castle late at night is not a good idea."
Hermione peered into his eyes as if she was searching for something. It worried her deeply that he was more aware of his surroundings than she was, something she just realized now. She was at a loss for words. There were evenings when she wished she was back in the dorm sooner since no one was out, but she waited for the time to pass anyway. The portraits were observing every single student, and she always assumed they were speaking to the Head Boy and Girl, if not Dumbledore himself.
She took a step back and averted his eyes, which only seemed to encourage him more. "I'm not trying to get into your head or anything like that, even if you won't admit it, you know I'm right... If you just accept what I'm saying and shorten our time, I won't bring it up again or taunt you with it."
Hermione scanned his face for any little twitch of his muscles. She had noticed how the thin skin beneath his eyes would twitch when he lied, or the side of his mouth; there wasn't any. His eyes were big as he practically begged. He must've really hated this.
With this request, any attempt of burying the hatchet was out the window. He didn't even like starting conversations. She had tried her best and she was done listening to him complain all day; a little less of it seemed like a good idea.
"Alright, you do have a point. Let's say 10 minutes?"
He raised his eyebrows and laughed. "10 minutes? It doesn't change anything. I say 20."
"It already takes half an hour! We can't go to our dorms that early,"
"Okay, that's easy. We'll find something else to spend our time with," his eyes were full of mischief.
Hermione stared at him as he suppressed his smirk. "No! We're not doing magic at night! Especially non-supervised!"
"Why are you so against it? Don't you remember third year—"
"No!" She interrupted him taking a step closer and cleared her throat. "We agreed, if you remember, not to talk about that ever again."
Malfoy parted his lips and watched her reaction, but she didn't interrupt him again. "I agreed not to tell anyone about it, which I didn't if you want to know. There was no such thing as not talking about it with you."He could see the panic and irritation in her eyes and decided to push more. "Do you know how hard it was to keep that to myself? I thought about telling Potter once or twice. I wonder how he would feel if he knew you used his cloak at night!"
"He already knew!"
—
2 years ago...
Hermione carefully hid beneath the cloak to cover her feet. No one except the prefects or professors would be out at this hour but she didn't want to raise her risk of getting caught. She had been taking extra classes this year and although McGonagall gave her a Time Turner, she wouldn't bat an eye even for her top student. But, Hermione had no choice. The common room was too noisy most of the time and she had to study more to catch up.
She took a few books and sat down reading, casting a little lumos spell. After half an hour she had already memorised the spells and their movements they have learned during this year's DADA classes.
"You know that won't work,"
The sudden panic made her drop her quill in an instant. This was bad. Terribly bad. While she was afraid of getting caught, she was more terrified to see that person being Draco Malfoy, because he would definitely snitch on her.
She noticed him looking over her notes and she shut her book. "Mind your own business.“
"You speak as if I broke into the library, tell me one reason not to call the professors.“
Hermione quietly cleared her throat and brushed her hair aside. "I don't care.“
"I know you do," he reached for the book she shut off, "let me see... isn't this the new spell we learned today? What are you doing reading about it?"
She took back the book. "I said mind your own business.“
His eyes went between her and the book and finally landed on the wand that rested on the table. "Don't say you were practising by reading it!" His eyes went big, and she felt a little embarrassed at how he was genuinely shocked at this new revelation. "This isn't the History of Magic class, Granger.“
She didn't meet his eyes and started to pack her notes, as she was about to leave he grabbed her wrist. She instantly yanked her arm away from him. "What do you think you're doing?"
He stood directly in front of her. "I'll help you,"
"What?"
He nodded. "I will help you practice properly, that's not the way to study DADA and... you will help with my History of Magic paper in return,"
She shook her head unbelievingly. "Why in the name of Merlin would I do that?"
"Because I caught you here?"
She smirked. "You're also out of your dorm Malfoy, remember?"
He bit his lip not to grin. "Yes, but I didn't break into here. Plus, I know you're too proud to tell your friends that you can't cast 'glacius'. If you help with my paper, I will help you practice, and before you even ask I promise not to tell anyone... what do you say?"
"Can't believe I agreed to that stupid idea of yours! It wasn't even that difficult.“
He looked away smirking as if he was reminiscing. "I was also surprised. Why would you, out of everyone, have a problem with a spell like that, I heard you petrified Longbottom in our first year.“
He was right. Glacius was even similar to petrificus totalus, and she could do so much better. She lowered her face, suddenly interested in her shoelaces. "I was too busy," she said quietly.
"I figured that much." He took a long breath as neither of them said anything about the matter. "How about a new agreement? I already proved my loyalty to my word."
She scoffed. "And what do you suggest that we do? You know they might watch.“ She pointed to the portraits with her eyes. There wasn't any that could hear their conversation, but she didn't like talking about this so openly.
"Prefects can also check the classrooms, right? We can go in one to check and do whatever we want. You can read your books and maybe I'll take a nap.“
"Or better, we take our chance and leave early. We'll see if any of them actually report anything.“
He looked a bit taken aback. "Bold. Alright, Granger, it's fine by me. I'll see you here next week," he turned and left without saying anything further.
On the other hand, the students were having a hard time with the new DADA professor, Dolores Umbridge. She was present at Harry's trial and had voted against him, she clearly didn't like Harry and was trying to prevent students from using magic in her classes. Harry tried to protest by saying that they would need actual magic against Voldemort and she shut him up by saying that he wasn't back and gave him detention for no logical reason. It wasn't any kind of detention, the words he wrote on the paper were brutally carved on his hand. When Hermione noticed his scars, she immediately advised him to talk to Dumbledore and tell him what happened. He didn't think it would be any help and wanted to take care of this situation by himself. He went to her room to be tortured by his own hands for a week and he still refused to take action so as to wouldn't let her feel like she's won or do anything worse.
Hermione had never been that good at DADA classes, but she knew from the beginning of the year that the Ministry would interfere with Hogwarts' everyday life. They were not admitting that he was back, yet they were still afraid of him. What could they expect if he suddenly attacked one of the students? They had to know at least a basic protection spell, and the ministry puppet Umbridge was not letting them do that.
That was it for Hermione, she was okay with the information on the book pages but Harry was right, this class was supposed to be teaching them how to protect themselves and none of them were ready, they had never been in an actual duel before.
Except for Harry.
When she realised the things he had done and was capable of, she managed to convince him to teach the other students some spells he knew. He refused at first, didn't feel like he was capable of teaching, but later agreed and they set up a meeting at a bar in Hogsmeade. There were 10 to 15 people and she had to convince them that Umbridge's way was not enough and Harry as the only person who fought Voldemort before, could teach them how to protect themselves. Thus, the Dumbledore's Army was established.
They were practising in the Room of Requirement in secret for weeks now. Since Hermione and Ron were prefects, it was easy for them to clear the hallways leading to the Room of Requirement. Today, Harry was going to show them the Patronus spell before Christmas and they tried to be extra careful not to get caught. Umbridge had set up an Inquisitorial Squad, consisting of Malfoy and his friends, and they were essentially doing anything to butter her up.
After patrolling for a few minutes, Malfoy and Hermione would go to an empty classroom as they talked before and he would indeed take a nap while she read away from him. They decided it was best not to be in their dorms during patrols, even though Hermione had suggested the idea before. They'd exchange a few words every now and then, but they never held a conversation longer than two minutes. She teased Malfoy about how ridiculous it was to do anything for that insane woman once he joined the Inquisitorial Squad, but he seemed to be taking his new role seriously and stopped talking to her altogether and didn't wait in the classroom to pass time anymore. That was better, actually. She had joked about it before, but lately she really had started to feel like if they could manage to get past their differences, they could be friends. He would sometimes make a joke by himself, and when Hermione laughed, he would freeze and stare at her blankly. His recent acts, on the other hand, reminded her of who he was and what they were. He was right, they could never be friends.
Hermione sneaked into the room of requirement without being seen and waited for others to come. When they were all gathered, Harry stood in the middle.
"In order to cast a Patronus spell, you'll have to focus on your feelings. I know that most of the spells we've worked with had something to do with feelings, improvisation and stress control, but this one particularly relies on your emotions." Everyone looked around at each other. Hermione didn't like spells like this, it was easier to go by the book than to rely on her feelings alone. "You need to think of a memory, a happy one especially. That memory will give power to your Patronus, so… it has to be a strong one. Then you will chant the words, 'expecto patronum'. Don't get disappointed if you can't get it at first, I also tried hard to get it right," he smiled nervously. "Alright then, let's get started."
Hermione thought it would be much harder than she expected but it was easy, she was going to think of the day she found out that she had magic in her blood and was offered to go to a school of magic. She thought of the moment she read the letter and spoke out the words, "Expecto Patronum."
Nothing happened. She decided to try a few more times but there wasn't a single speck of light coming out of her wand. She was getting flustered as she watched the others, there were already various glowing animals in the room. Ron had a dog Patronus running around and she still couldn't conjure a bit of light, to begin with.
"Do you need help?" Harry stood next to her.
She sighed. "I don't know why it isn't working."
"You should try yelling a bit more,"
"Yelling?"
He nodded. "So you can feel it better,"
She thought of the letter in her hands and yelled out the words, her blood was rushing to her body in every direction. There was still nothing. She looked down at her hands, she was always struggling with DADA class spells. She even had gotten help from Malf— she shook her head, thinking of him was no good in this situation.
"Relax a bit. I know you're getting frustrated but you should give it some time. Do you remember my first time?" His lips curled upwards thinking back.
"I remember you eating a lot of chocolate," Hermione shook her head, chuckling at the memory.
"I guess all you need is some chocolate after you faint," he laughed and looked back at her lovingly, "it's okay if you can't do it your first time... Maybe the memory isn't enough?"
"No, it's right. It has to be." She objected immediately.
"You can try a different one, don't think of a memory, just think of a time that you were happy."
Hermione thought about that for a second and tried to imagine a memory where she was happy. The first image was the letter again and she let herself get lost in her feelings. The second image was from her first year, Harry and Ron coming to her rescue in the girls' toilet and them leaving as friends. This memory started a chain reaction and she saw all the times she was with her friends, laughing. Winning the house cup, house championship, all the other students admiring her skills, Ron making a joke that cracked her up, saving Buckbeak and Sirius, lots of images of the trio laughing in the dorm, in Hagrid's Hut, in the Burrow, on the Castle Grounds. Getting the letter was just the beginning, what made her truly happy was the fact that now she had people around her that were glad to be with her and they were accepting her as she is. With that revelation, she yelled out once again and a little glowing otter came out of the tip of her wand, running and rolling around. It was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen.